wrestling / Video Reviews
Dark Pegasus Video Review: Twist of Fate: The Matt & Jeff Hardy Story, Disc One
Twist of Fate: The Matt & Jeff Hardy Story by J.D. Dunn Because these two discs are divided among the brothers, I’ve decided to review them separately. Matt Hardy Editorial: Okay, maybe I’m old-fashioned and don’t know all the subtle moral nuances of wash-your-dick-off-in-the-bathroom-sink sex, but I’m pretty sure there are literally NO circumstances under which it would be okay to sleep with your friend’s girlfriend while you’re married. None. Seriously, can anyone come up with a scenario in which they’d say, “Oh, well, now that I know that, Edge is a real hero?” Well, okay. There’s one. If, in fact, Osama Bin Laden threatened to set off a small tactical nuclear device inside of a major American city, and the only way to talk him out of it was to send him an Edge/Lita sex tape. Okay, *then* it would be okay. You should still send your friend a heads-up, though. I would respect Edge infinitely more if he had just said, “You know what. We were on the road. I got horny. She was a hot chick. Do the math.” It wouldn’t make it right, but Edge trying to say there’s some sort of rationalization that would explain it all away seems a bit sleazy. Edge caused problems with Matt, but Matt caused problems for the WWE by going public with the situation, so he got fired. Jim Ross implies it was a raw deal. Matt spent some time in Ring of Honor before the WWE decided things were settled down enough to bring Matt back for a feud with Edge. They agree that things aren’t forgiven, but they are in the past. Matches Matt quickly take things over to the announce table, but Kane tosses him off into the crowd barrier. Kane takes over on offense, and things get sluggish. You know, for a psychopath, he’s awfully slow. Ross and Lawler debate the morality of bartering for sex and whether or not Kane & Lita’s baby would be ugly. Ross reminds us that he was set on fire by Kane. Ah, who can forget that Emmy Award winning segment? Kane berates Matt for not fighting back, which is the same thing I’ve been doing for five minutes. Matt grabs a chair, but Kane boots him and takes it from him. To the ring, Matt slips out of the Tombstone and hits the Twist of Fate for two. Kane catches him with a chokeslam and tosses the steps in the ring. Lita runs in and begs Kane not to kill Matt. Kane tells her to watch what he’s about to do. Unfortunately for Kane, that entails grabbing the steps and turning around into a chairshot. The steps collapse on Kane, and Matt is able to get the win at 10:35. Ten minutes of sluggish Kane offense and a lucky shot from Matt do not make for a good match. *1/2 You can win by pinfall, escape or submission. Lawler inadvertently voices how stupid this style of cage match is in a blood feud. Paraphrased: “I hate you with every fiber of my being. I’ll do anything to get my hands on you! Now, let’s have a match where I have to run away from you in order to win.” Edge scurries up, but Matt catches him. They do the same thing near the door. Matt takes him over into a headlock, but Edge rakes the eyes. Matt gets two off a flying clothesline. Another flying clothesline sets up a Twist of Fate attempt, but Edge counters to a chinlock drop for two. Edge goes up, but Hardy catches him going over. Edge blocks the Side Effect and slams Matt’s head into the cage. Edge gets a missile dropkick off the top. Edge smacks him around for a while, and delivers a DDT. It gets a series of two counts. Edge decides to have a little more fun with a pair of turnbuckle powerbombs. The announcers start to beg for Matt Hardy’s life, which would be more dramatic if we hadn’t seen him in all those TLC matches taking a much bigger beating. Matt goes for a huracanrana off the top, but Edge counters it to a powerbomb. The referee starts counting them down for some reason before Edge rolls to a cover. ONE, TWO, THR-NO! Matt explodes with the Side Effect. ONE, TWO, THRE-NO! Edge says, “Enough of this” and goes for the door. Matt pulls him back at the last moment, but Lita hands the briefcase to Edge. Edge takes a wild swing, but Matt ducks and ties him up in the ropes. FISTS OF FURY! Matt bulldogs him on the briefcase and then tosses him, facefirst, into the mesh. Lita tries to climb up the cage, but Matt knocks her off. Edge is busted open this time, and this time it’s Matt kicking him squarely in the head. Matt goes up to the top with the briefcase, intending to bash Edge’s brains in. Instead, Edge shoves the ref into the ropes, crotching Hardy on the top. He spears Matt against the cage. Edge goes up, but Matt catches up with him again. This time, Matt does get the Side Effect off the top. Lita panics and grabs a chair. The ref takes it away from her, but she gets in the cage anyway. Matt covers. ONE, TWO, THRE–NO! Lita breaks it up! Matt goes after Lita, and Edge crawls for the door, sacrificing his piece of ass to save his ass. Matt catches up with him and pulls him back to the middle of the ring. Lita swings the briefcase at him, but Matt blocks it and gives her the TWIST OF FATE! Lita’s out of it. Matt turns around right into a SPEAR! ONE, TWO, THRE-MATT KICKS OUT! The crowd is really into it by now. Edge crawls up, but Matt catches up with him again and slams his head off the steel. Edge falls back to the canvas. The crowd eggs him on, so Matt dives off with a legdrop off the top of the cage. Matt drapes an arm over Edge…ONE, TWO, THREE! (21:32) This started out slow, but heated up considerably down the stretch. Not quite good enough to reach that **** plateau thanks to the tedious opening beatdown, but better than a lot of people would have expected. Edge crawls up the ramp rather than be stretchered out. ***3/4 King Booker and Sharmell join the commentary crew because Book is the other qualifier. Thus, we get the awesome commentary pairing of JBL and Booker. Matt hits a gutbuster and knees Mercury in the midsection. That sets up a gourdbuster for two. Hey, look at the motivated Matt Hardy! He misses a moonsault…by a lot. Mercury hits a Stroke for barely a two count and goes after Matt’s arm. Mercury blocks a charge by booting Matt’s shoulder, and then Matt can’t even get him up for Splash Mountain because of the bad shoulder. Hey, this is turning into a decent little psychology match. We go to break and come back to Matt fighting out of an armbar. Mercury legdrops the arm and then snaps it off the top rope. Back in, Mercury goes back to the arm with an overhand wristlock. Matt counters to a jawbreaker but Mercury punts him and goes right back to the arm. Majestral gets two, and it’s back to the arm. Mercury gets caught going up and gets slammed off. Matt hits the clothesline and bulldog for two. The Side Effect gets two more. Matt catches Mercury on top again and finishes with the Super Twist of Fate at 13:49. Fun little match. **3/4 Nice little mat-wrestling sequence to start. Kennedy gets an elbow to Matt’s mouth but runs right into a boot. Matt backdrops Kennedy to the floor as we go to break. We come back to Matt hitting an elbow to the back of Kennedy’s head for a two count. Kennedy blocks a backdrop and hits the single-arm DDT to give use the story of the match. He goes right after Matt’s shoulder. Matt fires back with his good arm, and they clothesline each other. Matt tosses Kennedy to the floor but gets shoved into the steps. Back in, Kennedy slaps him around and locks in a cravat. Matt slugs his way back again, but Kennedy, again, blocks a backdrop and starts forearming Matt in the face. Kennedy hits a sickening running knee and another! Matt slugs his way back a third time, but Kennedy tosses him on the bulldog attempt. Matt hits it on the second try and gets two. The Side Effect gets two more. Kennedy gets two off a Jackknife Roll, and they slug it out. Hardy counters the Finlay Roll, but Kennedy counters again and hits it! ONE, TWO, THRE-NO! The Kenton Bomb finds Hardy’s knees! ONE, TWO, THR-NO! Hardy’s legdrop gets two, but Kennedy counters the Twist of Fate. Matt reverses a whip and hits it anyway at 18:55. Hey, can’t complain about a couple of midcarders getting a chance to shine, and Kennedy has to have something to do while he awaits Mania. Good TV match, which is becoming a welcome trend from the WWE. ***1/4 This was one of the Hardyz last matches before leaving OMEGA behind for the WWF. The Thrillaz are Mike Maverick and Shane Helms. Helms plays to his hometown crowd, turning the Thrillaz into the babyfaces. The Hardyz ran with it and played up their WWF contract by saying they were better than everyone now. Matt and Shane wrestle to a stalemate, or, as Shane calls it, “That Ring of Honor bullsh*t.” Matt beats down Shane in the corner, but Shane BURSTS out with a Thesz Press. Big pop for that. Jeff runs in but gets speared silly by Maverick. The faces powerbomb the Hardys who clear out. Jeff and Mike get in, and Jeff bumps around like a madman. I think Jeff could have had a great career if he developed a cocky heel character (and stayed off the drugs). The Hardyz go for Poetry in Motion, but they’re heels, so Maverick just catches Jeff and slams him. The Thrillaz hit Poetry in Motion for real, setting up the 69 sell. The Hardyz are so traumatized that they have to share a hug on the floor, so Mike tosses Helms out on them. Back in, Shane assumes the face-in-peril role 12 minutes into the match. Jeff hits a springboard Swanton into a quebrada. Jeff hits a slingshot Arabian Press, but he stops to hug Matt. Matt tags in and applies the sleeper, but Shane reverses to his own. Matt and Shane start joking about internet fans and what the star rating is for this match. Shane also notes that this received MOTY votes. Matt V-Bombs (Crucifix Bombs) Shane. The ref gets bumped, so the Hardyz grab a chair. Oh, but it backfires, of course. Helms finishes with a splash off Maverick’s shoulders at 20:13. Yeah, I can see how this got MOTY votes. The heat is off the charts, and these guys were doing things that had never been seen in the major leagues. Plus, they used a tag style that was forgotten at that point. **** |
The 411: The documentary doesn't really tell you anything you didn't already know if you've been around for a while. It does provide a few details on how the Matt-Lita-Edge triangle went down. Matt comes off as a really driven and sympathetic guy who has been screwed over by politics and ill-timed injuries. I can definitely see him becoming an agent or booker when his career is over. Until then, though, hopefully he'll get a chance to shine as a singles star. Most of the matches are solid but nothing special. The bigtime ladder matches are available elsewhere, so that didn't leave a lot for this DVD set. The OMEGA match is worth a look, though. Ultimately, the DVD is a lot like Matt himself – I like it, but I'm not wowed. Thumbs up. |
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Final Score: 7.0 [ Good ] legend |
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