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Match 1: Adam Cole vs Christian Cage

LOCKUP!!! Crowd is HOT! Cage backs Cole into the corner till the ref breaks it. Cage backs up. Side headlock from Cage. Cole tries to break it. Cole breaks it. Hits the ropes. Cage with a shoulder tackle. Cole boots Cage in the corner. Cage drops Cole and sends him to the outside. Cole to the apron. He spits at Cage then runs around the ring. Cage cuts him off and hits a clothesline. Cage sits Cole on the corner, slaps him, rises up, Cole slinks out and superkicks the leg. Cage gets locked up in the Tree of Woe. Cole stomps him in the chest. To the outside, and Cole sends Cage into the ring steps!

Back from a break and Cole tries for a knee, only for Cage to toss Cole over the to prope to the outside. Cage to the top rope. He flies! Cole sends him into the floor! Cole gets Christian into the ring, heads to the top rope, dives, and eats boot! Cage mounts and hits some punches, gets to 10, then lets Cole head to the center. Kick to Cole, springboard off the corner into a rollup for 1.2…NO!!! Uppercut, whip, reversed, and Cole hits the corner, Cole swings upward with a kick. He locks the head for a Tornado DDT off the top rope! Cover for 1..2..N!O!!! Cole wants some time, and it works, but only for a second. Misses an enziguri, Cage oes for Killswitch, Cole escapes, pushes, Cage climbs up the top rope, Backstabber from Cole! Cover for 1..2…NO!!!! Cole talks some shit so Cage gets an inside crade. 1..2..NO!!! Kick from Cole is caught, reverse DDT! Cage to the top rope, dives for a headbutt, and Cole moves out of the way!! Kick to the knee, superkick! He hits the ropes! Running Kne! Cover for 1..2……N!O!!! They go back and forth until Cage gets Cole on the second rope and steps on his back. Right hand! Cage with a springboard, and Cole kicks him out of the air! Cover for 1..2..NO!!! Cole to the top rope. Cage slow to stand. He hits a right hand! Runs up to the top, rana off the top!!! Cover for 1..2…NO!!!! Cage runs out of the corner, kick to the knee from Cole! Panama Sun—no! Cage pushes him upward, tursn for a spear, but gets kicked in the face!!! Cole drops the kneepad, Cage ducks, rollup for 1..2..NO!!! SPEAR!!! 1…2…..NO!!!!!

Cage goes for a Kilswitch, Cole grabs the ropes! Cage grabs him, eye poke!! LOWERS THE BOOM! COVER! 1…..2…..3!!!!!!

Winner: Adam Cole
Yo, everything before the commercial break had me questioning this match, as very little happened, but when they got back, this shit was amazing. Good lordy.
Total Rating: ***1/2
Match Time: 14:52

After the match, Fish and KOR come down to attack Christian, but JB and Lucha are not far behind, attacking ReDragon up the ramp!

Hangman’s music hits, but Cole grabs a mic and tells Page to cut the music. He just beat a legend, and he’ll beat Page any day of the week.

Page takes the mic out of his hands and says next week, there’s a live Rampage in Texas. So he’s defending the title in a Texas Deathmatch. Page tells Cole he has a week to get his affairs in order. Nice.

We head to ROH’s most recent event where Jay Lethal hit the ultimate level of frustration. Gresham told him he changed, while Jay shoves his face and they go at it until Sonjay attacks Gresham as well. This elicits the return of Samoa Joe, who we will see tonight.

HE’S HERE!!!!

Match 2: Samoa Joe vs Max Caster

Joe with a headbutt after Max hits some chest pokes! He corners Max and hits a hard chop, then a whip, and a back elbow. High kick to the side of the face! Joe with an elbow drop! Max rolls to the outside. Joe looks to dive. HE DOES!!! Right into Max! Bowens distracts and Max hits a right, then rolls Joe into the ring and hits a right, another, a back hand but joe eats it. HUGE shoulder.

He grabs Max, sits Max on the top rope, bends him over…OMGGG MUSCLE BUSTER!!! Cover for 1…2…..3!!!

Winner: Samoa Joe
A squash, for sure, but that pop for the Muscle Buster, both from me and the crowd, was great.
Total Rating: NR
Match Time: 2:43

Lethal is backstage with Sonjay, and he’s mad that Joe dodged his call for months! Next week, they’re going to have a welcoming party for Samoa Joe.

Match 3: Shawn Spears vs Sean Dean
I come to the match already in progress. Shawn sends Shawn to the outside. Shawn sends Shawn back into the ing and chops Shawn in the corner. Shawn with another chop, but he misses and Shawn hits a chop of his own. Another chop! A third chop from Shawn! Shae kicks out, pumphandle into a neckbreaker to Shawn! Shawn covers! 1..2…NO!!! HE STOPS THE PIN! Shawn stands, waits for Shawn to stand. He grabs Shawn and puts Shawn on his shoulders.

We head to the back, and security guards are laid out. Lol. Apparnetly someone in the earpiece is telling Excalibur something.

We head backstage again, and Wardlow is destroying some more security goons. Wardlows fits do not miss. Wardlow gets to the curtain and the crowd pops loud. MJF is pissed. He clocks some more security down as he heads to the ring.

More security come in as Shawn gets a surprise rollup on Shawn! 1..2….3!!!

Winner: Shawn
Wardlow is beloved.
Total Rating: NR
Match Time: Stopwatch Issues

MJF gets in the ring to try and calm Shawn Spears down, but Spears is PISSED.

Backstage, Tony is with Yuta, Trent, Chuck, and Orange. Cassidy has an injury? Awww maaaaaannn!

Chuck wants to talk to Yuta. They helped train him. Chuck bought those tights. He can be the best wrestler with them. He loves Yuta.

Trent says no, he doesn’t love him. Learn something from the guys you’re trying to turn your back on. He shoves Yuta, Yuta tells him not to touch him.

I’m glad that the guy who didnt care that I broke my elbow grew up to win an ROH Title.

So earlier tonight, Santana, Ortiz, Eddie Kingston, and Mr. Socko kicked JAS’ ass in a hallway. Kingston even threw a TV.

Kingston and Co come down to the ring with a mic! Kingston wants to talk.

They don’t need music. He calls out Jericho, calls him a two-face coward. Y’all see Jericho run? Jericho and his peeps, on site. That means he can be with his wife and kids, he’s attacking. The other two morons…on site. Garcia! My man! Kingston knows where he lives! He’ll show up at his house! ON SITE!!!

Santana lookin clean calls them The Jericho Bitch Society. They scrubs. This is what they do. Better bring the harest fights to these dogs, because this is what they do.

Ortiz tells Jericho when he grows a pair and stops running, come to New Orleans next week for a six man. Either way, on site.

Kingston says they’ll beat that ass like Junkyard Dog and Butch Reed style.

We are BACK and Jade Cargill is here! She’s in leather pants. Thanks.

Tony asks her about her baddies. They aight. Jade tells Tony to cut the shit, although there is no shit to be cut.

She wants to introduce her baddie section, then tells the camera men to do their job. A baddie is a beautiful woman with confidence that knows herself, and she wants all the slobs to know that she knows herself. Sterling says it was difficult to find good looking people in Boston, but Jade did it. He is here to inform us that the one person not invited in the Baddie Section is Shafir. Let’s just address her as number 30. She is tired of all these MMA losers coming into this business. All these wrestling rejects coming into her ring on her show. The problem? Thankfully, Jade is the problem solver.

Marvez is backstage with MJF and Spears. MJF cuts him off quick, says not to say Wardlow’s name. Spears tells Wardlow he’s pissing up the wrong tree. MJF prays Wardlow shows up next week, because there will be twice as many security guards. As far as Shawn Dean, MJF vs him next week. There will be a Purple Heart for him, because MJF will injure him more than anyone else ever could in combat.

He then requests that the tv behind him be fixed, and shouts that he works at a circus while walking away. Hahaha.

Match 4: Tables Match
The Butcher and The Blade vs The Hardys
The Hardys run down during their entrance and attack. Jeff gets Blade in the ring, where some tables are already laying in wait. Blade sends Jeff into the corner where a table is set up, but Jeff stops himself. Blade removes his beanie and scarf, waits, and runs himself into a table, but JR explains that this doesn’t count. Butcher tries to send Matt into the timekeepers table, but Matt breaks away, then pick up a chair, only for Butcher to punch right through it. He runs into the ring and Jeff is hurting in the corner. Butcher locks up from behind for a German through the table. Jeff with back elbow. Matt is in the ring. He beats Butcher down. Double DDT. They lay Butcher on a table that’s propped up on only one leg. Jeff to the top rope! Matt holds Butcher down. Jeff looks to dive, but Blade trips him up! Matt runs to the corner, Blade hits a shoulder. He grabs Matt, hooks the leg, spins with a neckbreaker. Butcher goes after Jeff as Blade gets to the top rope. Suplex and Blade hits a crossbody, sending Jeff into the table. The table doesn’t break, and I’m not 100% sure what’s going on here….

We come back and Matt is beating down on Butcher’s back with a chair. It is explained that Jeff Hardy has been eliminated, and Matt is going at it in a 2 v 1 situation. Matt lays Butcher out on a table, kicks Blade off the apron, flies with a leg drop, and Butcher has been eliminated!

Blade is on the top rope as Butcher is dealing with Matt outside of the ring. Butcher continues to beat down Matt across the barricade, Blade grabs a chair, Butcher and Blade grab Matt and suplex him over the barricade and down to the mat. Jeff Hardy is nearby! He moved the table! Jeff kick Butcher, Inverted atomic drop, leg drop to the Butcher’s Meat! Jeff kicks Blade, TWIST OF FATE! Another Twist of Fate from Matt to Blade! Jeff is searching under the ring. He finds a ladder!

There are two tables set up, Matt lays Blade out on them. Jeff makes the climb. Jeff with a dive off the top onto Blade, ending the match.

Winners: The Hardys
From a purely storyline perspective, I don’t think we really needed this match at all. From a wrestling standpoint, this was a bit of a miss, considering the rules were convoluted and didn’t really make much sense. Seems to me that a table spot was blown and they had to plan on the fly for the “eliminations,” because it made little sense.
Total Rating: *
Match Time: 11:56

Andrade and Co come down to the ring, looking to attack, but Sting’s music hits! He’s here with the bat! He hits both of Private Party, then walks down the ramp looking to attack. He points out Andrade, and BUNNY gets in front of him? Lol.

JB and Lucha are backstage. Christian is PISSED. He tosses his water bottle in anger, and leaves. JB and Lucha challenge ReDragon to a match next week for the titles.

Match 5: Owen Hart Qualifying Match
Julia Hart vs Hikaru Shida
Hart attacks as soon as the bell rings then kicks Pillman and Garrison to the back!! Wow. Shida attacks in the corner, then goes under the ring to grab a chair! She sets it up outside, then runs and hops up for the knee strike. She hits a dropkick instead! She grabs Hart, sends her into the ring. Hart mounts Shida and hits a bunch of right hands as Shida tries to block.

We are back and Shida has the hair of Hart in her hand. She lifts Jukia on her shoulders but Hart rakes the eyes!!! She stands down in a headlock and hits a bulldog. Cover for 1..2..NO!!! Hart to the top rope. She dives and tries for a Twisted Bliss move but Shida moves, hits an elbow strike!! Spinning knee to the head!!

Shida lifts Hart, lifts up and slams her down with a Falcon Arrow! Cover for 1…2…..3!!!

Winner: Hikaru Shida
Short and to the point, but with enough story profession for Julia to keep the interest in her going.
Total Rating: *1/2
Match Time: 7:08

Serena Deeb’s music hits. Shida waits for her with her stick, but Deeb is behind her with a chair! Shida turns! Chair vs Stick! Who wants it more?!

Swerve talks about Vegas, talks about he and Lee being put through a table. What’s goin on with him and Starks, it’s not over, he aint forget. But for now, he’s gotta get ready. There’s some stuff he needs to do. He walks into the locker room.

Starks and Hobbs come running into frame, then into the locker room and attack Swerve!!! Lee runs in shortly after and gets him some! He hits a pounce, sending Hobbs through a wall. Nice.

My fingers aint ready for this match…

Bobby Cruise here to do the announcing.

Match 6: ROH World Tag Team Champioship Match
AAA World Tag Team Championship Match
FTR vs The Young Bucks
Cash and Matt to start. We got twenty minutes here. Lockup! Stiff. Cash backs Matt into the corner. Matt spins him, shoves him in the chest, Cash shoves back, sending Matt flying. Cash threatens with a fist. They back up, Cash shoots the leg, rough headlock on the mat, Matt rolls into a pin for 1..2.NO!!! Side headlock takedown from Cash, Matt gets the head scissors, kip up and Matt gets a side headlock. Cash escapes, gets his own, they hit the ropes, Matt shoots Cash off, and he hits a shoulder tackle, sendin Matt outside. Csah grabs Matt’s bandana and mocks the Bucks pose. Matt gets on the apron, then into the ring. He runs, drop toe hold from Cash! Tag to Dax. Dac works the arm, Matt backs him into the corner. Tag to Nick. Dax backs up to the corner. Lockup and Dax gets a side headlock into a takedown. He stands, cinches the hold, works the arm, Dax grabs Nick’s stupid headband and puts it in his trunks, then tosses it into the face of Matt. They hit the ropes, Dax with a slam, Nick kicks form below, arm drag into a lock, Nick stands, backs Dax into the corner, tags in Matt, Dax runs out of the ring around it, and bac in, and we get all four men in the ring! Nice.

Dax and Matt circle the ring. Matt sends Xash off the apron, so Dax knocks Nick off. Hard right from Dax, he hits the ropes, Nick pulls his leg out! Matt hits the ropes! Cash pulls HIS leg out! Nick and Cash enter the ring and meeti n the center for some back and forth! Matt and Dax do the same!! Cash gets sent to the outside! Double hip toss to Dax! Double dropkick! Cash back in! He sends Nick out! Back to the apron! Tag from Dax. Cash in with a Sharpshooter!!! Superkick but Cash duks!!! Dax in! SHARPSHOOTER TO NICK FROM DAX!!! Nick rakes the eyes of Cash! This breaks the hold! Nick sends Dax out of the ring. Cash is in the heel corner, Nick to the apron. Running high kick. Matt with a clothesline!~ Another kick and a cannonball senton from Matt! Right hand from Matt. Elbow form Cash, another, he stands, right hand form Matt, an uppercut, whip to the ropes. Right to the gut again. Side Russian Leg Seep! Matt drags Cash to the corner and hits the top rope. He dives off the second with an axe handle. Nick claps, faking a tag, and ref is coo with it. He chokes Cash up on the second rope with his boot. Nick

We back, and Cash is reaching for a tag. Matt runs in to stop it, Cash kicks him away, Cash dives to tag, but Nick is on the apron and Superkicks Dax down!!! Whip to Cash in the corner, The Bucks try for a double team, but Cash moves! Nick dives, and Cash hits a huge uppercut. Tag to Dax! He runs in, punch to Matt, another, another, right, left, some to Nick, then to Matt, suplex to Matt, suplex to Nick ONTO Matt! Clothesline sends Nick to the outside. Chop and uppercut combo in the corner, over and over to Matt .Whip, surprise rollup for 1..2.N!O!! WE get the trading of some pins from both men, both triyng for a backslide, ending up in a seated position and roll into a double pin that Knox counts till 2… PILEDRIVER FROM DAX!!! Cover for 1..2…..NO!!!! Dax grabs the head, locks him up in the corner. He sits Matt up on the top rope. Chop to Matt. Cash grabs Nick and hits a back suplex to him on the apron!!! Dax trips up the legs of Matt! Tag to Cash, Dax with a superplex, as Cash waits on the adjacent corner! But Nick is up! He hops up, head scissors sends Cash down! All four men are down as the crowd chants for AEW!

Nick in off the tag. Running knee to Cash, another knee, elbow, bulldog, and Matt dropkicks him as he falls. Tag to Matt. Nick rolls to the apron, kicks Da hard in the chest, hits Cash in the shoulder, dives over the top rope with a face buster, then tries for a moonsautl onto Dax, but Dax hits a brainbuster!!!! Matt kicks Dax hard, but Cash has Matt in a Gory setup! He slams Matt down hard with a Gory Bomb!! Cover for 1..2…NO!!!! BIG RIG ATTEMPT!! No! Matt counters!!! LOW BLOW! Knox doesn’t see it! The Young Bucks hit a Big Rig on Cash!!! Cover for 1…2…NO!!!!!

Matt gets Cash on the shoulders, More Bang for Your Buck! 450! Moonsault! Cover! 1…2……NO!!!! Matt rolls Cash over and pins again for 1..2..NO!!! Another!!! 1…2..NO!!!! Matt is frustrated! He tells Nick to go grab a title. Nick grabs one of the ROH belts, but Dax is there to play tug of war with it. Rollup from Cash for 1..2….NO!!!! Nick kicks Dax in the chest, BELT TO THE FACE OF CASH!!! ROLLUP!!! 1…..2……NO!!! DAX IS IN TO STOP THE PIN!!!!

DOUBLE SUPERKICK TO DAX!!! Tag from Matt! Nick is the legal man! They head over to Cash. Each grabs an arm. BTETRIGGER!!!!! Cover for 1..2…….NO!!! FOOT ON THE ROPE AND THE CROWD POPS HARD!!!!

Bell rings, but Knox tells the boys no, no, no, foot was on the rope! The Match is NOT over! We even get a replay to show proof. Knox calls for the match to continue. Tag to Matt. Matt lifts Cash, Nick to the apron. They’re goin for the Meltzer Driver, Nick springboards, Dax is in! He catches Nick midair!!

Powerbomb!!! Matt hits the piledriver, though!!! Cash and Dax in the ring! They grab Matt! Matt spits in Dax’s face! FTR TRIGGER!!! They kiss Matt on the cheek! Big Rig!!! Cover for 1..2..3!!!!!!

Winner: FTR
I need a cigarette! Lordy, that was great. SOOOOOO MUCH credit to both teams, but ya gotta give a hell of a lot of love for that crowd, because they were hooked the entire time, and so was I. This shit was great, instant classic, and really the only complaint I have is that it wasn’t ten minutes longer. Ok, also, maybe, Knox looking a little too dumb in this one. I know it’s a thing, but sometimes it really comes off as amateur.
Total Rating: ****1/2
Match Time: 20:08

End Show