wrestling / Columns

The Mount Rushmore of Ridiculous & Absurd Moments From 1999 WCW

July 4, 2019 | Posted by Caliber Winfield

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Greetings, all.

Everyone here listen to wrestling podcasts? What are ya’lls favorites? I love me some 83 Weeks & Something To Wrestle. Both are very different in style, but both endlessly fascinating and funny. Bischoff’s has been real eye opening, because he gives explanations for a lot of the more seemingly foolish actions done in WCW during his reign, and it makes you view them in a different light. Plus, Bish’ is very humble, and more than willing to admit his mistakes.

Both of these podcasts also made me realize just how much bullshit has been going on in the dirtsheets over the years. So many things I held true turned out to be complete bull.

Last time we hung out in WCW during the year 2000, and today we’ll go back to 1999, when everything started coming off the rails, despite the previous year being their most successful by a country mile.

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FINGER POKE OF DOOM

Why It’s On The Mountain: I think it’s pretty obvious. Although, to be honest, the FPoD is blown way out of proportion. Was it not the greatest idea in hind-sight? Yes. However, I was in the prime of my wrestling fandom at the beginning of 1999, and I remember this night crystal clear. In the living room was RAW, because I was a huge Mankind fan and really wanted him to win the strap, and in my room was Nitro, because I was a massive nWo mark, especially for the Wolfpac, and wanted to see Nash demolish Hogan. I was honest to God running back and forth between rooms, and when the big swerve happened, I lost my motherfucking mind. No joke. I was legit jumping up and down, and was SO happy. Because my all-time favorite angle ever was the nWo, and to get my boys back together, was a dream come true.

Nash says that they did this so Goldberg could have a heel machine to run through, however, by the next month, he was in a feud with Bam Bam and the nWo had shifted to Flair. I have no idea why this was, but I guess it just speaks volumes to WCW at the time. With all that said, I still love the moment. It was original, absolutely nobody saw it coming, and it got people talking. I mean, look at the pop from that crowd, and they were DYING to see Goldberg just smash them. Sadly, it never happened.

Kevin Nash [C] vs Hollywood Hulk Hogan – WCW World Heavyweight Championship
Man, the crowd is massive, and hype as all hell. It’s crazy to think they’d blow this. Funny to think that people thought Hogan was gonna wrestle in slacks. I love Nash’s entrance, because they legit set of 30 seconds worth of NON-STOP pyro, then Hall comes out, and after that it’s another 10-15 seconds. It’s so over the top. Hogan calls Nash a “spoon” twice. What an odd insult. It’s as odd as if he were to call him a fire-place poker. Nash was seriously over at this point, and it made sense for him to take the strap, I don’t care what anyone says. They posture up a bit, Nash shoves Hogan, and Hogan pokes him, causing Nash to hit the ground for the pin. There’s a big nWo fan in the crowd with his face painted, he’s like, 4th row, and he loses his damn mind when this happens. Goldberg finally shows up, and starts trashing the nWo. Luger shows up and attacks Goldberg, allowing everyone else to pile on. Bischoff is on commentary, and he’s ridiculously annoying here, as he gives sound effects for tazers and spray paint while being extremely over the top in his celebration. It’s pretty awesome. . Goldberg gets handcuffed to the ring, and proceeds to get his ass kicked as well as shocked with the tazer.
Hogan wins the title with a Finger Poke at 3:34 | *****

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HOGAN AND STING “SHOOT”

Why It’s On The Mountain: The FIRST FREAKING SHOW! The first freaking show that Russo gets to write and he immediately pulls one of his stupid fake-shoot angles. You know, I recently watched Vice’s Dark Side of the Ring episode on the Screwjob, and of course, Russo takes credit for it. However, you immediately know it’s a huge load of crap, and not just because it came from his mouth, but because after Montreal, this dork did this type of crap damn near every day. Never once before. But infinitely afterward. There was no explanation for this, it was NEVER mentioned again. Ever. In my research, nobody seems to know what the hell was going on with this. The rumors are that Russo wanted to repackage Hogan, and give him some time off. So, he wanted Hogan getting squashed in 30 seconds, which of course wouldn’t work. So, then I guess this was their response? To really confuse and piss off people who paid money? I’m getting so damn irritated just having to reflect on this crap.

Sting [C] vs Hulk Hogan – Halloween Havoc 1999
So, Hogan’s music plays, just about the entire thing, and Hogan doesn’t show. Sting’s music plays, he comes out. They play Hogan’s music again, it goes about half-way through before Hogan comes out in street clothes. I’m getting angry all over, because there’s a lot of people in the crowd with signs, kids, who were looking forward to seeing Hogan, and it’s fucking ruined because of Russo and his stupid, lame-duck bullshit. So, they talk for a second, then Hogan lays down and Sting pins him. They immediately cut to the Goldberg vs Sid package, as the crowd boos like crazy, and rightfully so.
Sting pins Hogan after he lays down at 1:32 | NO RATING

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nWo 2000

Why It’s On The Mountain: It’s about to be the new millennium. The turn of a century. Pretty much everyone alive for it ain’t gonna be around for the next one. Wrestling is at the heights of it’s popularity. WCW has had major ups and downs, Russo has been fired, sent home, you name it, along with all the other bookers. So, what’s their big idea to right the ship? Bringing back the nWo, however, it’s black & silver, and they’ve underlined the word “new”, so that way, you know it’s NEW. The nWo, in this humble writer’s opinion, is the greatest angle in wrestling history. I loved it even as it ran it’s course into 1998, and then had my love rejuvenated with the Wolfpac. However, the first quarter of 1999, I was done with it. 9 months later I, nor anyone else, was hankering for the nWo to return. But they did.

On the December 20th, 1999 edition of Monday Nitro, Bret Hart was facing Goldberg one night after they met at Starrcade, and near the end of the match it appears that Hall & Nash have shown up to pummel Bret whilst the ref is out. However, it’s a swerve, bro. They attack Goldberg, and as Piper pins Goldberg, the ref counts 3 and Bret keeps the strap. Yes, you read that correctly. Then Double J runs out, and they spray paint a few people, and announce the band is back together. I mean, absolutely no one gave a shit. It was such an uninspired rehash. Immediately after this, Bret, because of Goldberg, was injured and out forever. Hall & Nash quit giving a shit, and eventually all you had was Jeff Jarrett and the Harris Twins. I mean, what did they expect to happen here? There wasn’t nearly enough time since the last reincarnation for there to at least be some nostalgia pop to this. Especially when the last time you saw the nWo, they’d been far and away the focal point of the company for almost 3 years in a row. Even if Bret hadn’t been injured, and Goldberg hadn’t fucked himself up on Thunder, losing the group’s main foil, as this was the SECOND time they’d reformed the nWo for Bill, it wouldn’t have worked. There is nothing in wrestling that was more over-exposed than the nWo at this point. It’s lunacy to think it’d work. Or, easier, it’s just on par Russo booking.

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MARCH 8TH, 1999 EDITION OF NITRO WITH NO WRESTLING THE FIRST HOUR

Why It’s On The Mountain: I know here at Mt. Rushmore we don’t list things or place any moment or match above another, but, I really feel like this needs to be number 1. The first hour of this damn show, had NO WRESTLING. NONE. Now, it wasn’t that it just didn’t have wrestling, but the stuff that we got was absurdly boring, and borderline terrible in some cases. Here’s the order of things we got:
Footage of the barbwire steel cage being built for Hogan vs Flair, a SIX MINUTE clip from Thunder of Anderson talking to Flair, Nitro girls at a Nitro party, Jazz choreographing some dances, ANOTHER long-ass clip from Thunder where Hogan speaks on his distaste for Flair, more from the Nitro party, Konnan music video, we get ANOTHER clip from Thunder, however this time we watch Nash & Hogan watch it, this is insane. We get a video on Sexy Flexy Lexy, an ad for a K-Dawg shirt no one wants, because Konnan was a cringey dork, we then get a clip that I like and found pretty damn funny where Buff & Scott get in trouble and in order to get out of it they have to do minor police work, back to the stupid Nitro party, a video on Rey vs Nash, footage of Hogan & Nash going to a shooting range with Torrie Wilson, then going to dinner with her to discuss taking care of David Flair.
Finally, after all that, it’s time for the damn show to start.

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Mt Rushmore, WCW, Caliber Winfield