Cook’s ROH TV Review: 12.25.20

Hey kids! It’s Ring of Honor’s Christmas tradition this week, a ten-man tag team match with two captains picking & opening presents to find out their random partners. This year, the captains are Jay & Mark Briscoe. Judging from the video shot of them opening presents, both men seemed optimistic. Let’s see who was right, and let’s hook em up!

In Memoriam: Brodie Lee, who did not exactly have the best win-loss record during his time in ROH. That’s more of a damning of the people in charge at the time than of Brodie Lee himself, who was an exceptional competitor and a fantastic man from all accounts. I have more thoughts on Brodie here.

Cook’s ROH TV Review 12.25.20

– Quinn McKay wishes us a happy holidays and runs down the card for tonight. The Christmas 10-man tag team will headline, but we also have a Dojo Challenge pitting Ken Dixon & Eric Martin against Dante Caballero & Joe Keys.

– Jay Briscoe opens some presents to decide his team for later tonight. He likes the first pick so much he’ll stay right on that table. He likes the second pick too, so he’s staying right on that table. He’s not thrilled with the third pick, so he goes off the table. He likes the fourth pick.

– Dixon & Martin don’t seem to like each other too much based off of this prematch promo. Two different approaches. Dante & Joe know Ken pretty well. They were trained by Jonathan Gresham and were encouraged to start on a new foundation. If they win, they’re more than the ring crew! Yowie wowie.

– Ian & Caprice are still here working the holidays.

Eric Martin & Ken Dixon vs. Dante Cabalerro & Joe Keys: No stats on these guys? ROH asleep at the wheel. Commentary putting over these guys for casting aside their previous personalities and assuming the ROH dojo persona. Typical right-wing spin you’d expect from Sinclair, I suppose. Dante & Eric start. Ian telling us we’ll see a lot of basic moves. Taught by Will Ferrara & Jonathan Gresham. Dante’s been taught to de-emphasize his Cuban roots, apparently. I would probably enjoy this more if I wasn’t being told repeatedly that these guys are going back to the basics and forgetting their actual personalities. ROH totally doing the thing everybody complains about with WWE. Ian trying to draw the comparison with New Japan, but I’m not buying that. Dixon gains the advantage on Keys as we go to commercial. We come back and Dixon makes the tag to Martin. BIG BODYSLAM AND MAYBE THE TIDE WILL TURN BETWEEN THESE 4 GUYS IN GENERIC TIGHTS. Cabalerro making a run, at least he has a bandana. Crossface on the bearded guy! Martin makes the save! Ian making a Buzz Sawyer shoutout was not something I expected, but it happened. We hitting some moves for a near-fall. Pumphandle slam, clothesline, people down, Will Ferrara out there slapping the mat. Joe Keys comes in. He goes up top after some offense, hits a diving headbutt because people that do that are smart. Half crab. Ropes. Keys eventually hooks in a Liontamer, and there’s a tap out.

Winners: Dante Cabalerro & Joe Keys
Match Rating: *1/2

– I can’t say it was technically bad, but I was never given a reason to care about anybody in the match. Sorry, I would like to care about people! Ian trying to sell us on these two guys as a tag team, and how great everybody is. God bless him.

– Mark Briscoe is not happy that his big brother got to pick first. Just like it was back in the day! He likes the first pick. The second pick will work! He can make the third pick work, though he doesn’t seem excited. He loves the last pick! It’s Christmas time!

– Brian Johnson has joined Ian & Caprice on commentary. I’m not sure who asked for that, but they are on my s*it list. He gives Ian & Caprice Bozo 1 & Bozo 2 t-shirts.

Jay Briscoe, Flip Gordon, Brawler Milonas, John Walters & PCO vs. Mark Briscoe, Beer City Bruiser, Dak Draper, Tracy Williams & Dalton Castle: Some entertaining Christmas lists for these gentlemen. Walters & Williams start off in a Pure battle! Hot Sauce off to a good start. Dak tags in, he wants some of Walters. He gets a little, Flip tags in and dropkicks Draper. Flip with a sleeper! The Bouncers get tagged in, and they’re tagging each other! They don’t mind fighting. Double cross-bodies! PCO & Dalton Castle tag in. Two former world champions! Some solid grappling here. Now some ground and pound! We return from commercial, Dalton ditches the turtleneck, then tags in Mark. PCO tags Jay, and here we go! The Briscoes exchanging, and everybody else runs in and exchanges! It’s broken down! Flip might have killed himself on that dive. PCO & Mark going at it as you’d expect. PCO with a dive! Jay & Mark back in the ring, tag to Walters, cover on Mark gets 2. Walters tags Gordon, Jay’s team working Mark over now. PCO contributing. Mark gets out with a tag to the Bruiser, who works Walters over. We return from commercial and Walters & Williams are back in there. Williams tags Mark in, Mark hits the vertical suplex for two. Tag to the Bruiser, who hits the nerve hold on Walters! Good sequence here, but things break down right away. I was going to try to call this for a minute, but that’s not happening. Draper with the delayed backdrop suplex. Jay sends Draper out of the ring, Williams comes in, gets locked in a triangle choke by Walters, but Beer City Bruiser goes to the top rope, hits the frog splash! PCO breaks up that cover! PCO with a double arm DDT on Dak, hits the PCOsault and gets the 3 count!

Winners: Jay Briscoe, Flip Gordon, Brawler Milonas, John Walters & PCO
Match Rating: ***

– I gotta say it, John Walters stood out to me in that match. PCO got the win, good for him, but Walters was the glue in there. Give that man the Pure Title, especially since he’s not acting like he’s related to the Governor of Arizona.

– Happy Wrestling, and Happy New Year!
–

6.0

The final score: review Average

The 411

It's a Christmas show, so I wasn't expecting much, and I didn't get much. The traditional 10 man tag was good, I have no idea why they trotted that first match out there instead of recapping their PPV unless they have an angle in mind for those gentlemen. If it's me booking, I recap the PPV at the start, break everything down, give the 10 man tag the rest of the time. But that's just me. I also wouldn't put an annoying wrestler on commentary for the main event. That's just me.