wrestling / TV Reports
Cook’s ROH TV Review 5.7.21
Image Credit: ROH
Loading...Hey kids! We’ve got something a little bit different this week, as our main event actually involves the ladyfolk! Indeed, Angelina Love’s ongoing issue with ROH TV host & backstage interviewer Quinn McKay will be settled tonight. We’ve also got the Briscoes taking on some recent pains in their backside and a Brian Johnson open challenge, so let’s hook em up!
Cook’s ROH TV Review 5.7.21
Ian Riccaboni welcomes us to Ring of Honor Wrestling, as the regular host Quinn McKay is in the main event this week against Angelina Love. Quinn has been training hard, but Angelina is a decorated veteran. Brian Johnson has issued a challenge to anybody on the ROH roster. First, the Briscoes will take on Flip Gordon & EC3.
Ian & Caprice are on the call.
EC3 walks up to talk to Flip, but Flip does all the talking since he knows how to beat Briscoes.
Quinn talks to the Briscoes, who are back in the boat. Their opponents have some nerve and have it coming, son. Dem Boys are back, and the opponents need to bring their ass.
Flip Gordon & EC3 vs. Jay & Mark Briscoe: Bobby Cruise introduces this as the television main event, so apparently some creative changes were made between taping & airing. EC3 is now wearing trunks instead of the jeans he’s worn in previous TV matches. The Briscoes come out to what’s apparently some old music for them. EC3 exchanges handshakes with both Briscoes, meaning respect has been earned! EC3 & Jay start with a rasslin exchange. Jay with the early advantage but it’s EC3 eventually with the chinlock.Man, with the chinlock, the trunks, the physique and the buzzcut, EC3’s giving off some serious Randy Orton vibes. Everybody wants to look like that guy! Tag to Mark Briscoe, who kicks away on EC3’s abs before tagging to Jay, some more strikes before we hit the Ric Flair commercial.
Mark fires away on EC3 until Flip intervenes with a knee to the lower back and makes his own tag. Jay makes the tag and stomps Flip down in the corner. Double shoulder tackle, Mark removes his shirt and uses it as a choking device on Flip Gordon. Mark’s still mad about that ball shot. Jay gets wheelbarrow suplexed on the floor, and that changes the momentum. Superkick, and Flip tags EC3, who delivers a running dropkick on the floor. Not the wisest move, but Jay gets the brunt of it. Elbowdrop back in the ring gets two. Jay fights out of a front facelock, breaks EC3’s jaw, but EC3 with the Thesz press and the piston-like right hands before the Ric Flair commercial.
Vertical suplex by EC3, Flip tags in and gets a two count. Flip does the deal and gets a two count. NOBODY KICKS OUT OF THAT! Jay busts Flip’s spine on a springboard attempt, and makes the tag to Mark. Mark goes redneck kung fu on Flip. EC3 gets kicked to the barricade, Flip gets axehandled and put up top. Iconoclasm gets a two count thanks to EC3, and it’s a Pier Four brawl. Jay & EC3 fight on the outside. EC3 breaks up the double team, clotheslines both Brisoes. Ian declares EC3 a specimen. EC3 tags himself in. Mark & EC3 exchange shots, Mark & Jay hit the Redneck Boogie for two thanks to Flip. Flip springboard crossbodies Jay on the floor, then slides a chair into the ring while Mark’s trying to cutthroat drive EC3. Flip takes advantage of the ref distraction to nail Mark with a chain, and EC3 hits the One Percenter for the three count.
Winners: Flip Gordon & EC3 (10 minutes or so via pin)
Match Rating: ***
Jay & Mark are none too happy with how this went down. Solid match but didn’t quite reach that next level a lot of Briscoe tag matches do.
Brian Johnson tells us about how life can imitate art. We’re more divided than we’ve ever been, and where your loyalties lie are how you are judged. It’s no different here in ROH. Some guys are starting to build a kingdom while others preach the way of the pure. Some swear that violence is the answer, while others claim to be righteous. Some are creating their own promotion so they can change the culture, while others have an entire faction just for their family. Standing alone on an island all by himself, with a gasoline tank big enough to set all of ROH on fire is the Mecca, Brian Johnson. In 2021, while ROH is divided and people say that wrestling is for everyone, there is no more inclusive pro wrestler than him, as he is an equal opportunity ass-whooper and set to prove it. He marched into ROH’s office and demanded a match against anybody. Nobody is talking about the Mecca. He’s ready to start building his legacy & run through everybody. He’ll be remembered as one of the greatest of all time. It’ll always be Mecca vs. Everybody.
Good stuff!
Johnson’s in the ring, and who’ll answer his challenge? Why, it’s Danhausen! He’s heard there is an open challenge. Seeing as how Danhausen has already decimated Johnstone seven to ten times, Danhausen has decided to bring a gifthausen! It’s PCO! Boy, if PCO & Danhausen are on the same pagehausen, things are going to get very nice & very evil very quickly around here.
Brian Johnson vs. PCO: Danhausen joins Ian & Caprice for some announcehausen. Johnson attacks PCO from behind, but these punches, kicks & shoulders don’t have much effect. Danhausen says he sent PCO a letter. Big clothesline from PCO. Suplex sends Johnson down, then a DVD into the corner as we go to the Ric Flair commercial.
Johnson gets tossed around ringside, culminating in a backdrop over the guardrail. Uh oh, PCO is malfunctioning! He strikes the timekeeper, and pushes Bobby Cruise back first into the barricade! The referee runs for his life as PCO rams himself into the barricade. Right in front of Johnson, who takes advantage of the situation by delivering some strikes and ramming PCO into the barricade. PCO back in the ring, Johnson goes up top, clothesline off the top followed up by a few more standing clotheslines, PCO tumbles outside and Johnson with the tope suicida. Big splash off the top rope, but Johnson rolls off and PCO sits up. He’s back online, and there’s a popup powerbomb. PCO up top, there’s the PCOsault for only two! PCO starts malfunctioning again and goes after the referee. Meanwhile, Johnson undoes the top turnbuckle, which PCO runs into, rollup wiith Johnson’s feet on the rope gets a two count. PCO with the Destro Death Grip! He might extracting some teeth for Danhausen! Johnson submits.
Winner: PCO (6 minutes or so via submission)
Match Rating: **1/2
Danhausen loves that PCOhausen.
Angelina Love talks about how there’s a jealousy & bitterness towards her in ROH. She didn’t think the one that would have the biggest problem would be the backstage interviewer. Quinn McKay is associated with the age of entitlement. She’s not a wrestler. At some point in her life she had too many hits to her head or something. Angelina doesn’t have words for how dumb Quinn is being, but dumb = Quinn McKay. Quinn decided suddenly she’s a wrestler, Angelina says it doesn’t work that way, but she’s up for the mini challenge of teaching Quinn a lesson. She’s only been doing this for 20 years, and easily locked Quinn in a room & did her interviewing job better than Quinn could. So if Quinn wants to challenge her to a match, 1. That’s hilarious, and 2. She doesn’t have a problem teaching her that lesson. Mandy Leon asks why Angelina is wasting her time with this when they have better things to do, and the Allure head off.
Quinn McKay talks about how she didn’t think she would be given this opportunity. Her first love was roller derby, which she did for eight years before stepping inside a wrestling ring. She’s super in-experienced, has never had a match on television, but she’s been training her whole life how to fall and get back up again. She went to the ROH Dojo three years ago to be a wrestler, but when the backstage interviewer position came open, she went after it. Storytelling is her passion, and she loves ROH so much that she wants everybody to be able to tell their story. Angelina is supposed to be this icon and somebody that led this revolution of women’s wrestling, but Quinn wouldn’t put her on that list if you paid her. The bitterness, animosity & insecurity that she plants in the women’s minds make it impossible to build a women’s division on crumbling pieces. She lays waste to everyone and stands in the middle of it like a dark angel. In order for the division to flourish, Quinn will take the first step and stand across the ring from the hydra, and cut the head off. Now Quinn will get to prove why she was invited to ROH in the first place. What happens if she loses? If she fails, was any of it worth it?
Maria Kanellis-Bennett joins Ian & Caprice at the announce position.
Quinn McKay vs. Angelina Love (w/Mandy Leon): Angelina has the six inch height advantage and the eighteen year experience edge. Quinn offers her hand for the traditional handshake, Angelina passes on that. Mandy says Quinn has to earn the respect. Angelina with the early advantage with armbars & headlocks. Double-leg takedown and Angelina walks across Quinn! Some disrespect before we go to the Ric Flair commercial.
Quinn with a headlock on the mat as we return. During the break, she “surprisingly held her own” according to Ian. Stomp to the foot breaks the headlock, the old hair yank down to the mat gives Angelina the advantage. Quinn gets her head pounded into the mat repeatedly. Angelina chokes Quinn on the rope with her boot, then Mandy joins in the fun behind the ref’s back. McKay tossed down to the mat. Love runs into an elbow in the corner, but headscissors McKay in the other corner. Flatliner into a Koji Clutch by Angelina, Quinn’s pretty far from the ropes but she’s making a move. Angelina drags her away and reapplies the hold in the middle of the ring. Quinn looks like she’s about to go out, but Angelina releases the hold before the arm drops three times. Love is looking to have some fun here. Looks like a mistake though, Quinn hits a jawbreaker. Off the ropes, but Mandy’s trip attempt creates a distraction. Quinn turns around, manages to avoid the kick and hits a powerslam! Caprice nearly has a heart attack as it gets a two count. Quinn picks Angelina up, and locks in the Tangerine (Million Dollar) Dream! Angelina gets close to the ropes but Quinn moves it back to the middle with a body scissors. Mandy talks some crap on the ring apron about how Quinn will never be a wrestler, and that gets Quinn to break the hold and focus her attention on the ringside second. Sure enough, there’s the Botox Injection and the three count.
Winner: Angelina Love (8 minutes via pinfall)
Match Rating: **1/2
Angelina clinches a bye in the first round of the upcoming tournament while Quinn heads back to her hosting duties on ROH television.
Next week: Josh Woods vs. Silas Young, Shane Taylor Promotions defends the Six-Man Tag Team Championship against Primal Fear!
