Dark Pegasus Video Review: No Mercy 2002

No Mercy 2002 by J.D. Dunn October 20, 2002 Live from Little Rock, Ark. Your hosts are Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole and Tazz. Mildly funny cold open sees Kane and The Undertaker enter the dressing room and compare notes on how their weeks went. Opening Match, World Tag Team Titles: Chris Jericho & Christian vs. Booker T & Goldust. Jericho had problems with Booker T, and the other two just kind of got sucked in by proxy. Goldust cleans house on the champs before Christian snaps his neck on the top rope. The Canadians take over on offense, but Booker gets the hot tag (and a big pop). The Scissors Kick misses, and Booker crotches himself on the top rope. Goldust blind tags himself in and gives Christian nothin’ but Shattered Dreams… Shattered Dreams. Jericho jumps him and puts him in the Walls of Jericho, but Booker breaks it up and hits the Scissors Kick. Christian makes the save. Jericho tries a Lionsault, but the rope breaks under his feet. Oooh. That looked dangerous. Jericho improvises, bulldogging Goldust on the title belt and finishing with a moonsault at 8:47. Not bad, outside of the ring breaking down. **1/2 In the back, Funaki, Smackdown’s #1 Announcer, gets a word with Al Wilson. Ah, yes. Torrie Wilson’s father and the greatest thespian in the world. Funaki asks the question that’s on everyone’s mind: why was Al wearing clothes when he was in the shower with Dawn Marie? You know, they really missed an opportunity by not having Torrie’s father be embarrassingly racist and anti-Semitic. Then Torrie could go around apologizing to everyone in the back for her dad calling Booker “a colored” and telling Billy Kidman to “get him one of them bready Jew donuts from catering.” Torrie Wilson vs. Dawn Marie. This would actually be okay if they didn’t try to wrestle. Unfortunately, they do try. Referee Mike Sparks gets steamrolled as their brawl gets out of control. Dawn chastises him for copping a feel. Torrie gets two off the schoolgirl rollup. A Torrie neckbreaker finishes at 4:41. Pretty bad. I’d forgotten how hot Dawn was, though. 1/4* In the back, Rob Van Dam tries to rip-off Ric Flair’s interview style. It would have been better if he had called some kid “fat boy.” Coach spots Tracy, the Undertaker’s tryst, and asks her about her claim that Taker was cheating on Sara. She screeches that she wants to see him hurt in the Hell in a Cell. This whole thing was stupid. Tracy, btw, is better known as “Jacuzzi Girl #2” from Back to the Future, Part 2. The WWE spares no expense when it comes to its bit players. Rob Van Dam vs. Ric Flair. Talk about your clash in styles. Van Dam charges and hits a flying thrust kick. That leads to a handspring moonsault for two. A springboard kick gets two. Flair finally goes low and clips Rob’s leg. Lots of chops and wrapping Van Dam’s leg around the ropes follows. Rob fights back, but Flair pokes him in the eye and clips him again. Van Dam comes back with a series of rollups. It actually looks like Flair is guiding him through them. Rob reverses a figure-four. Flair goes up but gets slammed off. That sets up the Rolling Thunder, but Flair has his foot on the ropes. The Frogsplash finishes at 8:01. This was oil and water mixing to create not a beautiful rainbow in the gutter, but a big ol’ mess. * Meanwhile, The Big Show asks Stephanie McMahon why he’s so underutilized. Eric Bischoff bursts in on them and demands to know what’s going on. This would lead to Bischoff trading Show to Smackdown for Batista, Randy Orton, Val Venis, D-Von Dudley and Stephanie’s credibility as a General Manager. Recap of the history of the Intercontinental Title, which was being retired. Recap of Noble and Nidia feuding and then turning on Tajiri, who was caught in the middle. Cruiserweight Title: Jamie Noble (w/Nidia) vs. Tajiri. Tajiri attacks and hits a moonsault off the apron. Noble takes over and kicks his way back. Tajiri likes the idea of trading kicks, though. Tajiri blocks a sunset flip, but Noble drops him with an Electric Chair drop. Noble screams, “C’mon, boi” several times and targets the back. Tajiri comes back with the Tornado DDT and goes nuts with the kicks. The Handspring Elbow sets up a modified Gory Spin and a German Suplex for two. Tajiri hits the Buzzsaw Kick, but Nidia has the ref distracted… with her tongue down his throat. You know, herpes is a communicable disease, WWE. That allows Noble to hit the Tiger Bomb for two. Tajiri tries a Victory Roll, but Nidia reaches in and grabs Noble’s ankle to keep him from going over. Noble is able to block and pin Tajiri at 8:16. Tajiri kisses Nidia after the match, so Jamie offers to show him how a good, ol’ Southern Boy kisses. But, she’s not even your sister! Tajiri Buzzsaw Kicks Noble, knocking him into Nidia. **1/2 In the back, Chris Benoit tells Eddy Guerrero that Chavo is getting beat up by Kurt Angle. Eddy says he’s not going to fall for the same trick twice (they tricked him on Smackdown). Turns out that Chavo really was getting his ass kicked, though. Agent Finlay keeps Eddy from attacking Angle. Recap of the Katie Vick angle. See, Kane used to be a party animal in between furloughs from his 20+ year stay in the insane asylum, dodging the psycho stalker that showed up every May 19, and watching wrestling on Sunday mornings with his “Uncle Paul.” One night, his friend Katie wanted to go home from a party, but she was a little drunk, so Kane decided to drive, and, despite the fact that he was a masked man who had burns all over his body (or psychological burns, who the hell knows) and may or may not have set the fire that killed his parents (except for “Uncle Paul,” who turned out to be his real father), Katie agreed to let him drive her home. Unfortunately, an animal ran out in front of them (perhaps tossed out in front of them by up-and-comer Terra Ryzing), and Kane swerved to avoid it. He lost control of the vehicle, and Katie was killed in the accident. If only he hadn’t been wearing the mask, he might have had peripheral vision. Kane was never charged with any crime, but of course, had he been, he probably would have been found “Not Guilty by Reason of Insanity,” given that he was already in an asylum for burning down the funeral home and killing his parents. You have to hand it to Paul Bearer, though. He managed to keep the whole thing out of the papers so the Undertaker (who he was managing at the time) wouldn’t find out that his brother was still alive. World Title vs. Intercontinental Title: Triple H vs. Kane. The Intercontinental Title, which at this point contained the combined histories of the U.S. Title, Hardcore Title, and European Title, will be dissolved no matter whhho wins. Kane tries to throttle Hunter, but Hunter comes back with a neckbreaker. Another neckbreaker gets two. Lots of plodding offense follows. Kane walks into a spinebuster. Sleeper puts everyone but Kane to sleep. He comes back with a backdrop and the flying clothesline. Ric Flair runs down to help out, though, distracting the ref while Hunter grabs the title belt. A belt shot gets two for Hunter. Hurricane Helms runs down to even things out, but he eats a Pedigree. Kane blocks whatever Hunter was going for and sets up for a chokeslam. Hunter blocks, and Kane accidentally boots the ref. Oops. To the floor, Kane chokeslams Hunter through the table. Flair fires off a few chops on Kane, but Kane no-sells and glares Flair down. Back in, Kane grabs the sledgehammer, but Hunter goes low. Kane shrugs it off and goes for a Tombstone, but Hunter uses the sledgehammer. Kane gets distracted by Flair again, allowing Hunter to hit the Pedigree at 16:13. Most people hate this because of the angle that led to it (and because they dissolved the IC Title). It was pretty bad for the first ten minutes, but once Ric Flair arrived on the scene, it picked up. ** In Stephanie’s office, Stephanie tricks Tracy into revealing that the whole thing was a ruse by Paul Heyman. Tracy, who has apparently been an actress for over a decade, doesn’t realize that there is a camera and cameraman in the room with them. Nor does she realize that the Undertaker is hanging around behind the door. Wait. Why did the Undertaker need to hear that? He’s the one who KNOWS that she’s lying. Vacant WWE Tag Team Titles, Tournament Finals: Chris Benoit & Kurt Angle vs. Edge & Rey Mysterio. Stephanie was sick of Raw dominating the tag scene, so she created a new set of tag titles. This would be the finals of an excellent tournament to crown new champs. Angle and Benoit were still feuding, but Stephanie demanded they get along or get suspended. Angle arrogantly tosses Rey around and asks him to tag in Edge. Rey refuses because he wants to prove himself, though. Rey hits Angle with a seated dropkick and a headscissors. Edge goes 50/50 with Benoit before Angle cheapshots him with a knee. They repeat the spot, only this time Edge spears Angle off the apron. Cool. The heels isolate Edge and settle in the tag formula. Angle belly-to-bellies Edge. Benoit nails Mysterio and goes up, but that extra time allows Edge to crotch Benoit and hit a superplex. HOT TAG TO MYSTERIO! Mysterio knocks Angle off the apron and hits a sliding dropkick to Benoit’s face. Angle storms back in but gets sent right back out by Rey. Rey hits that guillotine legdrop that I hate, but at least he set it up well. He goes for a Wheelbarrow Bulldog, but Benoit just drops him and turns it into the Crippler Crossface. Edge hops in and saves. Rey sets up for the 619, but Benoit catches him. Edge dropkicks them over, and Rey gets two. Rey goes up, but Angle returns, runs up the ropes and tosses Mysterio all the way across the ring. AWESOME! Thing settle down again, this time with Mysterio playing face-in-peril. Angle hits a backbreaker and an overhead belly-to-belly. Benoit adds more punishment, including the sickening chops. Rey headscissors him into the buckle, though, and gets the HOT TAG TO EDGE! Rey hits Benoit with the Broncobuster. Edge lofts Rey up into a huracanrana on Angle. ALSO AWESOME! ONE, TWO, THR-Benoit breaks it up with a Swandive Headbutt, but he waylays his own partner. Edge tosses Benoit and covers again. ONE, TWO, THRE-NO! Angle hits a desperate German, and Benoit returns to add the Crippler Crossface. Rey sneaks in to break it up with the 619. SWEET MERCIFCUL ZEUS! Angle goes for the Anklelock on Edge, but Edge shoves him into the ropes and small packages him on the rebound (how he beat him earlier in the year). ONE, TWO, THRE-NO! Fans thought that was it. Edge reverses to his own Anklelock, but Angle rolls through and reverses, getting the tapout at 21:58. Wow. You know these might be four guys who are either crazy, broken down, dead, or a combination of all three, but this night, they were ON. Not only was the match intense, action-packed, and exciting at every turn, but it was creative in how they wrestled one another. One of the best straight-up tag matches I’ve ever seen. ***** In the back, the Undertaker intimidates a doctor into giving him a shot so he can make it through Hell in a Cell. Wonder if this will make WWE 24/7 when the time comes. I joke, but honestly, it’s one of the most telling segments of the past few years. According to the WWE, that’s what real men do. If they’re hurt, they shoot up and take the consequences later because they’re rugged. Of course, when the consequences are killing your wife and kid, thinking you can beat Randy Couture, or dying in a hotel room, it all becomes a “personal choice.” Hopefully, things are different now. Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Victoria. There was actually an angle here, as Victoria claimed Trish slept her way to the top of the fitness model world. It was supposed to make Victoria seem like a whiny heel, but all it did was make young guys wish they owned fitness magazines. This goes along okay (compared to the earlier women’s match). Okay, that is, until they botch a monkey flip. That looked bad. Trish comes back with the handstand huracanrana and backdrops out of a Canadian Backbreaker. Victoria sideslams her and goes up, but Trish catches her with an Electric Chair. The Chick Kick gets two, and Trish hits a pair of neckbreakers. Hey, Triple H did that same thing in his match! That sets up Stratusfaction, but Victoria apparently blocks it. Trish rolls her up for the win at 5:33. * Rikishi joins us from “The World” to talk about how the December 2000 Hell in a Cell changed his life. WWE Heavyweight Title, Hell in a Cell: Brock Lesnar (w/Paul Heyman) vs. The Undertaker. Taker’s hand is in a cast from an earlier Lesnar attack. Lesnar ducks a swing and takes the Undertaker down on a go-behind. A brutal powerslam gets two. Taker gives him a gutshot with the cast. Brock tries to run away, but there’s nowhere to go. He’s finally forced to attack the Undertaker’s injured hand. Taker fights back with his cast. That’s kind of cool psychology, really. Taker is able to inflict more punishment with the hard cast, but it also hurts his hand every time he uses it. Brock is busted open. Taker tosses him facefirst into the cell, which probably doesn’t help matters much. Taker covers on the outside… for two? Cole explains that it is FCA. Taker repeatedly drills Lesnar into the mesh as Brock bumps around like a madman. Taker drapes his neck over the apron and drops an awkward knee off the top for two. Heyman tries to reach through the cage, so Taker yanks him into the chainlink by his tie, brutalizing Brock’s agent against the steel. Brock finally manages to flapjack Taker into the cage to take over. Brock ties the Taker up with Heyman’s belt and hits his broken hand with a series of chairshots. Brock rips the cast off…eventually. The champ sets Taker up on the turnbuckle and swings his feet into him. Taker lowblows him and drops an elbow off the top. Brock escapes to the apron where Taker boots him into the cage and tackles him with a tope. Brock slams the ringsteps into Taker’s head, busting him open big time. He casually tosses the ringsteps over the ring, which is the most impressive thing he’s done all match. Not that Brock has had a bad match or anything, that’s just really impressive. Taker runs into a spinebuster. ONE, TWO, THRE-NO! A wobbly Taker fights back with his “injured” hand. Cole covers nicely by saying Taker is probably running on adrenaline and not feeling pain. Taker stomps on Brock’s hand and goes Old School. Brock yanks him off the top, but Taker counters his F5 to a chokeslam. What broken hand? It only gets two. Brock is about to go for the Last Ride, but Taker backdrops him over and delivers a DDT. ONE, TWO, THR-NO! Brock drives Taker into the corner to counter the Last Ride. Taker gets it anyway. ONE, TWO, THR–NO! Brock gets his hand on the rope. I guess it’s Falls Count Anywhere but near the ropes. Lesnar counters a Tombstone to the F5 for the successful defense at 27:16. Solid effort that suffered gaps in psychology and logic that held it back. The hand psychology was right there for them to use. All they had to do is a spot where Taker was unable to do the chokeslam, or couldn’t deliver a “soupbone” because of the injury. Instead, it was move-sell, move-sell, move-forget to sell. The match was appropriately violent, though. ***

The 411: Hey, you gotta see the tag match at least once. Smackdown was in a serious groove at the time, and had they been able to put together those matches with good booking instead of non-sensical Scooby Doo angles, lesbians, Al Wilson, and Undertaker's "mistress," they probably would have been remembered as being on par with WWE 2000 or the NWA in 1989. As far as Raw is concerned… well, they had Trish Stratus. Thumbs up for the tag match and HIAC.

Final Score:  7.5   [ Good ]