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Jeremy’s Impact Wrestling Review 1.5.21

January 5, 2021 | Posted by Jeremy Thomas
Impact Wrestling 1-5-21 Sami Callihan Eddie Edwards
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Jeremy’s Impact Wrestling Review 1.5.21  

Hello there, Impact fans! It’s Tuesday and that means it’s time for another episode of Impact Wrestling. I’m Jeremy, and y’all know how this works. Or actually, you don’t because this is going to be a little different. I will not be able to do a full recap as normal this week, as Impact is no longer sending out screeners and I can’t live recap as full and focus on news posting. As such, this will be a much briefer coverage than usual. We’re looking for someone who can give you weekly live coverage. Either way, I’ll still be watching weekly because dammit, this company has won me over in the past six months. Anyway, let’s jump right in!

As a reminder, the GoFundMe for Larry’s daughters is still active and if you can make a donation, that would be awesome. Thank you so much to everyone who’s done so thus far.

* Previously on Impact: The Good Brothers feud with the Motor City Machine Guns and ally with Kenny Omega, who gets involved after Karl Anderson’s win on the last live episode. The Brothers and Kenny leave the Guns and Rich Swann lying to end that episode, leading to the six-man tag match being created for Hard to Kill.

WE OWN THE NIGHT! (AKA Title Sequence!)

Ace Austin vs. Blake Christian vs. KC Navarro vs. Crazzy Steve

Happy to see Ace back! I’ve missed him over the last several weeks. Steve jokes around with Navarro and Christian and gets knocked down, the veterans fight on the outside while Christian and Navarro do some aerial work on the inside. Austin trips Navarro off the ropes and pulls him out for a beatdown, then slides in and faced off with Blake. Fulton with the distraction and Ace attacks. Austin eats a kick to the face and a headscissors takedown, Austin counters and kicks in the corner. Irish whip and Steve sends KC out of the ring, locks in Upside Down on Ace for four. He’s up and leaps off into a fist to the gut, Ace with punches but gets whipped into KC. KC with a rana to Steve, off the ropes and he hangs Austin on the ropes. Springboard apron dropkick, he goes up but Blake shoves him to the floor. Ace with a kick to Blake’s head, he goes up, superplex attempt stopped by Steve who goes for a powerbomb but gets blocked and knocked down. Blake slips out the back of a superplex, kicks Ace and dives onto Navarro. He punches Ace in the gut but eats a kick from the apron. Steve and Ace fight, Austin knocked to the floor. KC dives through the ropes onto Blake, Austin back in and he dives onto Blake and KC. Steve and Ace now fighting, Steve in control in the corner. He goes up to the second rope, but gets punched off the rope, pin by Ace gets two. KC in and he takes Ace down with a neckbreaker off the ropes for a two-count. Black takes KC down, springboard but misses Ace, caught with a standing Spanish Fly, frog splash gets two, broken up by Steve. Steve on Blake now, and he splashes Ace. Runs at Blake but eats a boot. He charges and gets caught into a tree of woe over Ace. KC comes in, gets caught with a short-arm reversal and a DVD onto Blake AND Ace! Steve with a diving DDT off the top, pinfall.

Winner: Crazzy Steve (7:08)
Rating: ** 1/2
Thoughts: Good fast-paced action to start the show. It gave the newcomers in Navarro and Christian some spotlight work while giving Steve some needed momentum heading into Genesis

* Josh and Madison hype Genesis and then talk the Hard to Kill main event. Omega’s bus is here again, with Callis on it. Rayne hypes up tonight’s Knockouts Tag Team Title semifinal tournament with Grace and Jazz facing Havok and Nevaeh.

* Sami Callihan video time. Joy. He does the hacker thing and says everything in life has a purpose. Eddie Edwards’ purpose is to show the world anything is possible if you work hard and play by the rules. But Sami is here for the reality check: we don’t win in a fair world, and bad guys win in the end. He gives Eddie advice for tonight: make sure Alisha isn’t at ringside. Thumbs up, thumbs down.

A new AEW ad has Tony and Tony wishing Happy New Year’s and talking about helping the less fortunate (Impact) during the holiday season. They hype Night One of New Year’s Smash on Dynamite tomorrow including Snoop Dogg, Wardlow vs. Jake Hager, Shida defending the Women’s Title against Abadon, the Bucks and SCU vs. TH2 and The Acclaimed, and the weigh-ins for Darby Allin vs. Brian Cage. Also, Sting and the return of Jon Moxley, Cody vs. Matt Sydal, and Kenny Omega defending the World Title against Rey Fenix. Khan hypes up Fenix and talks trash about how Callis said he was partially responsible for the creation of AEW while hyping up Omega and calling Callis a parasite. He calls himself a patron of wrestling and says he’ll buy another ad using the $100 from his grandmother’s Christmas Card. That’s delightful.

* Omega, Callis, and the Good Brothers are in the trailer celebrating with all their gold. Callis talks about the six-man tag match at Hard to Kill and says they have to win it. Kenny says it’s a foregone conclusion. He says Swann and the Guns have no history or chemistry. They’re fueled by hate and jealousy. They’re a team, but Kenny and the Brothers are a family. Callis wants a belt.

* Cousin Jake is in the ring with Rhino and says it’s been the hardest few weeks of his life and that betrayal from family cuts deep. He pleads for Cody to fix this, and then calls out Eric Young and Joe Doering. Here they come, with Cody bearing a shaved head. Joe has the most ridiculous fur coat of all time and I am HERE FOR IT.

EY says Cody answers to him now, because he showed him the truth. They’re looking at the real world and the design. The trio walk to the ring, and they get in. It’s match time.

Cousin Jake & Rhino vs. Cody Deaner & Joe Doering

Jake pleads with Cody and gets attacked. Cody is beating on Jake like a man possessed and stomps him down, then chokes him in the corner. He manhandles Jake and chokes him against the rope as EY barks orders. Joe tagged in and he kicks Jake in the head, then stars to beat on him Jake ducks a clothesline but gets crossbodies and we’re on break.

Back from break and Cody is choking and stomping Jake in the corner. He picks Jake up, slams him into the corner, charges in with a clothesline. More stomps and he chokes Jake in the center of the ring for a four-count. Jake slips out the back of a suplex and tags in Rhino, who comes in hot. Belly to Belly Suplex. Jake in and is pleading with Cody, but Joe attacks Rhino and EY distracts Jake allowing Cody to hit the low blow. DDT and the pinfall.

Winner: Cody Deaner (7:53)
Rating: ** 1/4
Thoughts: Cody’s new look and attitude are good for him and anything that gets him a chance is good in my book. Match was fine but repetitive, dragging down a bit due to the same thing happening over and over but all in all it was fine.

They attack Cody after but Dreamer comes out with a kendo stick to make the save and run off the heels. Dreamer gets a mic and says EY betrayed him so he knows what it’s like. He calls them out for a six-man tag match at Hard to Kill under Old School Rules.

* Gia Miller welcomes Matthew Palmer and asks about his three-minute challenge with Moose. Palmer says he didn’t mean to rip Moose’s shirt and drove ten hours there to get his foot in the door. The way he sees it he has two choices: cower and be ashamed or get in the ring with Moose, possibly get his butt kicked, and hold his head up with pride. If he lasts the three minutes, the whole world will know who he is.

* Johnny Swinger is in an office when Detective Acey Romero comes in. Acey wants to get to the bottom of how Larry was set up. He says Steve told him that Swinger has information, and Swinger suggests he talk to the Knockouts. “Just barge into the locker room, I do it all the time.” Good luck there, Acey.

* Deonna and Kimber walk down to the ring. Deonna gets a mic and says she doesn’t know what Taya Valkyrie’s problem is. She notes that Taya got angry after Deonna beat Rosemary and then Deonna and Kimber cost Taya and Rosemary their tournament spot. She says the question is what happens when she locks in her submission moves and puts over all her accomplishments and names. She says the only question at Hard to Kill is whether Taya finally accepts reality.

Taya then comes out with Rosemary and they walk down arm in arm and you cannot convince me they are not a couple in storyline. Taya says Deonna is delusional but she’ll make it easy: she’s the longest-reigning Knockouts Champion in Impact history and Deonna has never faced her. She says she’s seemed distracted with everything, but she never lost focus and she wants the Knockouts Champion. Deonna says she lost the title to Grace, who she beat. Deonna says it’s only a matter of time before Rosemary leaves and Rosmeary is pissed. She says to look around at everything she’s done and calls this the Age of the Virtuosa. She mocks Taya’s Longest Reigning claim and says when she breaks Taya’s arm at Hard to Kill, that won’t matter anymore. Taya gets up in her face and shoves Kimber down. She says a husband jab is not very original and says Deonna is scared of her, the unknown, and that she’s going to humiliate Deonna when she becomes a two-time Knockouts Champion and ends the Age of the Virtuosa and opens the Era de la Wera.

* Rohit walks up to Bey and says he’s been thinking of a New Year’s Resolution. He forgives Bey for wanting an X-Division Title shot at Hard to Kill. He says they’re even now, but Bey says they aren’t even until he’s X-Division Champion again. He says he’s not here to squabble; he came here in peace. Their problem is Manik and if they unmask him it’ll be down to them. Bey likes that and asks where he is; Rohit says they should go find him and off they go.

* TJP is backstage reading a magazine anbd Rohit and Bey walk up, asking if he’s seen Manik. TJP says he’s probably close by but he hasn’t seen him. Rohit says they want a tag match of Manik & TJP against Bey and Rohit. TJP says he doesn’t get along with Manik, but if he sees him he’ll let him know.

* Tenille and Kaleb with a K approach Rosemary and says she sees what Taya’s been doing, going after bigger and better things, and asks where it leaves Rosemary. Rosemary says their alliance is stronger than ever. Tenille says she knows about partner split and Kaleb lists all Tenille’s failed tag teams. She says one door opens when another closes, and Rosemary knocks on Kaleb’s head, saying she’s not interested.

Knockoutu Tag Team Championship Semifinals
Jordynne Grace & Jazz vs. Havok & Nevaeh

Jordynne & Nevaeh start off and lock up. Some counter wrestling to start off, Jordynne with a couple pin attempts. Nevaeh takes over, Grace flips out, Nevaeh counters and comes off the ropes for an awkward sequence that results in a shoulderblock to Nevaeh. Havok is in, Grace off the ropes, shoulderblocks do nothing until Grace is knocked down. Jazz tagged in and they stare down. Havok with a shove, Jazz talks some shit and slaps Havok. They start trading big shots, Jazz takes control. Forearms back Havok into the corner, but she reverses a whip across the ring and hits a clothseline. Tag to Nevaeh, they slam Jazz into the corner back-first. Splashes by both Havok & Nevaeh, cover but Grace breaks it up. Jazz rakes Nevaeh’s eyes, elbow to the back of the head. Tag to Grace, kick to Nevaeh’s cut. Double Irish whip and double back elbows, Grace pins for two. Jazz in now and they work Nevaeh in the corner, double underhook suplex by Jazz and a cover gets two. Tag to Grace, double suplex to Nevaeh, Grace covers for two. Elbow to Nevaeh’s jaw and chops in the corner, Jazz tagged in. Axehandles to the back of Nevaeh and Jazz takes Nevaeh down, cover gets two. Grace tagged in, double axehandle off the top to the arm. Jazz back in, Nevaeh fighting back with elbows but cut off, she hits a neckbreaker on Jazz and both are down! Both tags are made, Havok is in hot and kicks Grace down. Hard charging boot to the corner, BIG power bomb to Grace, Jazz breaks up the pin! Grace fights off Havok, Nevaeh charges into a boot, Jazz is in and takes Nevaeh down, schoolboy to Havok and a near-fall! Grace tags Jazz in, douvle whip into the ropes, she kicks Jazz and chokeslams Grace! Havok picks up Jazz, Tombstone and that’s it!

Winner: Havok & Nevaeh (9:49)
Rating: ** 1/4
Thoughts: This had moments of great action, punctuated by some very awkward spots usually involving Nevaeh. I wanted to like it more than I did, but it wasn’t exactly bad per se. It was just a bit disappointing.

* Rich Swann and the Guns are backstage with Gia Miller. Sabin says he wanst to know who Omega and the Good Brothers think they are. Impact was built onthe backs of people like the Guns and Swann, and they better be ready at Hard to Kill. Swann says he’s been a Machine Gun from the inner city before, but now he’s repping Detroit with the MCMGs, one of the greatest teams in wrestling history. Since they brought up Clearner, Kenny Omega, he says the letters on his title belt don’t say AEW, they say Impact World Champion and he’ll be damned if he lets someone come in from another company to say they run this place. They’ll show Kenny and the Brothers that pain is temporary and pride is everything. Shelley says he’s not scared to get his ass kicked, and suggests they go to the camper. That’s where they head.

* Back from break, Swann and the Guns walk out to the trailer and slam on the door, telling them to come out. Omega and the Good Brothers attack from behind of course, and beat them down, with Omega choking Sabin with his shirt. That didn’t go well for Team Impact. They mock Swann and say Kenny is the REAL World Champion, and Omega says these babyfaces were easy to kill.

* Backstage, Jordynne Grace apologizes to Jazz and says winning the tag titles meant everything to her. Jazz says losing was not part of the plan, and Grace says she’s disappointed in herself and disappointed for Jazz. She apologizes, and Jazz says no apologies because she’s grateful she got to mix it up with the new generation. Grace wants to give her one more match, a singles bout between then at Genesis. Jazz is in, and we have a match.

* Deonna and Kimber ask Father James Mitchell if it’s done, and he says Su Yung is not Su. But she’s not Susie, either. She comes out in a suit and says she’s Susan.

* Eddie Edwards is backstage with Alisha prepping for his match with Callihan tonight.

Three Minute Challenge
Moose vs. Matthew Palmer

Poor Matthew, we hardly knew ye. He charges in and lays in fists at Moose’s command, but Moose with a standing uranage to destroy Palmer. He does it again and stands over Palmer, talking trash. Moose mounts for some punches to the head, then stands and circles to talk trash. Kick to the gut of Palmer, and he tells Palmer to give it his all. Palmer with punches but he gets knocked down and kicked in the head. A stomp and kick as we’re at 1:22 left. He yells at Palmer, hits an axehandle, then stalks him and throws him across the ring. Moose tells Palmer to give it his best shot and he hits a jumping knee. Moose with a takedown and a power bomb. He lies in wait and out comes Willie Mack. Moose is distracted and Palmer lasts the three minutes!

Winner: Matthew Palmer (3:00)
Rating: *
Thoughts: All story, and there’s nothing wrong with that.

* Ethan Page is backstage on a couch, saying everything is unravelling since they lost the titles. Karate Man’s voice spouts Zen wackiness, and Page says he believes he’s derailed, but Karate Man says life is sending him on another path and to trust. Page says he had plans, made plans, followed through, and everything just fell apart. Karate Man says to deconstruct his life so he can come back better than before. Page says the problem is that everyone in the company has it out for Ethan Page and maybe this place is the problem. He asks Karate Man if he’s listening, and he says yes. He’s listening to a man with no confidence or purpose: he’s listening to A BITCH. Page is incensed and they stare down as Page says he’s the best wrestler in Impact history and it’s time for him to beat the crap out of Karate Man. Karate Man says all his matches are fought in kumite and it will be done at Hard to Kill. That should be interesting…

* Back from break and Matthews & Madison break down Genesis:

– Super X Cup Tournament
– Jazz vs. Jordynne Grace
I Quit Match: Moose vs. Willie Mack

Next week on Impact:

Non-Title Match: Rich Swann vs. Karl Anderson (All competitors banned from ringside)

– Next week is Impact on AXS TV week, leading into Hard to Kill on January 16th.

Sami Callihan vs. Eddie Edwards

Sami attacks right off the bat and tajes it to Eddie before the match starts. The weapons come out and Sami assaults Eddie, but Eddie manages to duck a chair shot and briefly take control until Sami throws a chair in his face. Sami stands on Eddie’s groin, then batters Eddie who fights back. Technically the match hasn’t started yet but we’re going to break!

Back from break and we’re still not in the ring, as Edwards throws Callihan back first onto the apron. He hits Callihan with a chair to the gut and Callihan fires back with a ring bell to the head. Ring bell hammer to a chair against Eddie’s head, and he tries to jab the hammer into Eddie’s eye. Eddie avoids that and backs off, then takes control. They’re trading blows on the outside, Sami with a back suplex onto the apron. Callihan is busted open slightly, and he hits a crawling headbutt to Eddie’s side. Callihan gets up and walks away to take a breath, then throws a chair into Eddie’s head. He tells Eddie he should have stayed home and then chokes Edwards against the floor. Callihan picks Eddie up and measures him for a punch, then backs up and charges in with a kick to Eddie against the guardrail. Sami sets up a chair, grabs Eddie and goes for a suplex through the chair. Eddie blocks it, fights back, and headbutts Callihan repeatedly. Callihan dazed in the chair, Eddie charges and Sami up! Big suplex through the chair and Edwards is clutching his knee. Sami FINALLY rolls him into the ring and comes in and NOW the bell starts. They’re both up, they stare off ans start trading shots. Eddie takes control and the ref tries to pull him off, and he shoves the ref! They repeat the sequence with Sami in control and shoving the ref. Eddie with a big boot, comes off the ropes into a big hand. Sami comes off into another boot and they knock the ref down, who calls it off.

Winner: Double DQ (1:13)
Rating: * 1/2 (For the whole thing)
Thoughts: It was a lot of hardcore beating each other up. Nothing innovative, just “hit with object, kick, hit with object, brief sequence, hit.” I was not a fan.

After the ref leaves, the continue fighting and Callihan dives into Eddie on the outside. He rolls Eddie in, who comes off the ropes and dives onto Sami. Eddie gets the bat and is looking a little psychotic. Sami begs off and backs up the ramp. Eddie stalks him, pounding the bat on the ramp and telling Semi to beg. Sami pulls out his phone and hits a button for the lights to go and Alisha appears on the Tron trapped in a room.

Eddie nails Sami with the bat and goes running for Alisha, yelling for her as he runs backstage. He finds her but it’s a trap and Shamrock is there. Sami comes in as well and they beat him down. Shamrock says it’s Eddies fault as Sami wraps Eddie in barbed wire. He nails Eddie in the face with the bat, and Ken and Sami mock Alisha. Ken says it’s Eddie’s fault again before they exit and Alisha tends to Eddie. Fade to black.

The final score: review Not So Good
The 411
This week's Impact was supposed to set up Genesis and is the second-to-last show before Hard to Kill, and there was some movement on both. Mostly though, I was disappointed here. The matches were what they were and were okay for TV matches mostly except the main event, which I did not like. The storyline developments didn't do much for me except for Su Yung becoming Susan and Cody Deaner's new look. Not the best show of Impact's recent history by any stretch, but it was thoroughly watchable.

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Impact Wrestling, Jeremy Thomas