The SmarK RAW Rant – May 10 2004

The SmarK RAW Rant – May 10, 2004

– Live from San Jose, CA.

– Your hosts are JR & King.

– Opening match: HHH v. Shelton Benjamin. Shelton gets a pair of armdrags before the bell even, and gets two. Backslide gets two. Fireman’s carry takedown into an armbar, and a rollup gets two. Back to the armbar, but HHH takes him into the corner and works him over. Benjamin misses a blind charge, but gets a powerslam for two. He pounds away in the corner and gets a DDT for two. Blinger splash misses and HHH clotheslines him to the floor to break up the momentum, but Shawn Michaels runs in for the DQ at 2:32. Well, there goes Shelton’s winning streak against HHH. ѕ* I guess if you’re gonna do a shitty finish like that, do it before the match gets going.

– Shawn calls out HHH, but Uncle Eric wants to make an example out of him and has him thrown out of the building because he’s suspended. Better make him turn in his badge and gun, too. He’s a loose cannon!

– Meanwhile, Ric Flair rallies the troops, and Eric gives HHH a title shot next week. Just what we wanted. I think we can all call the finish a million miles away.

– Tajiri v. Batista. Tajiri throws some kicks to start, keeping Batista off-balance, and dodges a charge to put him on the floor. Baseball slide and Tajiri sends him into the railing, but gets sent into it in turn by Batista and rammed back-first into the apron. Back in, Batista works on the back and gets a suplex, and continues pounding the back. Tajiri comes back with a sunset flip, but walks into a sideslam. Batista whips him into the corner and goes back to work on the back, but walks into a superkick and a leg lariat. Dropkick and he fires off some kicks, into the handspring elbow, but a lariat ends that rally. Batista tries the powerbomb, but Tajiri reverses into a DDT for two. The Big Kick is blocked, however, and a spinebuster finishes at 5:02. Hey, a finish that actually meshes with the psychology of the match, go figure. *1/2 Batista destroys him afterwards, and forces him to swallow his own mist.

– Stacy joins us to shill the new Divas DVD, but Molly & Gail Kim interrupt, all jealous and stuff. Victoria stops a potential beatdown, but Jazz reasserts herself, along with Nidia, and it’s a big cluster. OK then.

– Intercontinental title: Randy Orton v. Edge. Edge is still from Toronto, for those keeping track. Lockup battle to start, and that gets us nowhere. Orton grabs a headlock and takes him down, but Edge fights free. Orton pounds him down and starts on the neck, but Edge whips him into the corner and pounds the back. Backbreaker gets two. They slug it out in the corner and Orton goes down, so Edge stomps the back and wraps him around the post in a ringpost bow-and-arrow. He lays in some sledges to the back for two and tries a submission move on the back, but Orton fights out. Edge clotheslines him out and nails him off the apron, then introduces him to the stairs as Flair joins us at ringside and we take a break. We return with Orton in control, as you’d expect, as he gets his neckbreaker for two. Orton grabs an armbar and works on the neck at the same time, and then catches Edge with another version of the move when he fights out of it. Edge fights out again and kicks him away for the double KO. Edge recovers first with a small package for two. Orton brings him down with a neckbreaker for two, however. To the top, but Edge rolls through a high cross for two. They slug it out and Edge backdrops him to set up a backdrop suplex, and that gets two. They head up to the top and fight over a superplex, so Edge just slugs him down to the apron and spears him into the railing. Back in, Edge goes up with a missile dropkick for two. Orton goes for another neckbreaker, but Edge powers out into an Edge-o-Matic for two. Orton tries a rana, but Edge counters into a powerbomb for two. Very nice. Orton tries the RKO, but Edge shoves him into Flair, then spears Flair, which allows Orton to cradle from behind for the fluke pin at 17:58. Yeah, it’s the old “face goes after the manager and gets rolled up for the pin” finish again. Match started slow, but got going really good until the weak ending. ***

– Meanwhile, Regal leads Eugene through some training, but Eric wants him to throw the match so he won’t have to deal with Eugene anymore. And if that happens, Regal gets his job back.

– Victoria, Stacy Keibler & Nidia v. Molly Holly, Gail Kim & Jazz. Jazz takes Victoria down to start and into some crossfaces, but Victoria slugs back and blocks a blind charge. Jazz legwhips her down, into an STF, but Nidia breaks it up. Into the heel corner, but Molly gets slugged down, and then Gail gets powerslammed for two. They need to rethink their tactics. Finally a cheapshot turns the tide, and Gail fires away with forearms, into the flying armbar, but Stacy breaks it up. It’s BONZO GONZO and we’re left with Gail v. Victoria, as Gail clotheslines her into Konnan’s Tequila Sunrise for the submission at 2:41. Yeah, use KONNAN’S shitty finisher, that’s the way to win me over. Kinda shortish and not really much going on, but it made the point with the Gail v. Victoria program. Ѕ*

– Meanwhile, Trish gets all bitchy and tricks Lita into thinking Kane is there, and a brawl erupts. Some people just can’t take a joke. Besides, with all the drugs Lita seems to be on lately, who KNOWS what she’s seeing?

– Matt Hardy v. Val Venis. No match, as Kane pops up on the Titantron and reveals that Val has been disposed of.

– Rob Conway v. Eugene. Eugene is quite shockingly over. He tries going to the top, but opts for a lockup instead. Conway grabs a headlock, but Eugene reverses out of it with an armdrag. Rollup gets two for Eugene, and a backslide gets two. Crucifix gets two, but Conway lays him out with a clothesline and stomps away. He wrenches the neck, but Eugene counters out of it and hulks up. He fires back, into an atomic drop, both ways, and the airplane spin. He goes up with Conway stunned, and a double axehandle gets two. The crowd is really into this character. Legdrop gets two. Regal trips him up, however (and he claims innocence), but Eugene finishes with a bridged rollup anyway at 3:40. This guy’s got a shot. **

– Chris Benoit gets a VIDEO! With Finger Eleven’s “One Thing” to boot.

– Uncle Eric announces that next week it’s Lita v. Trish, and a 20-man battle royale to determine the #1 contender for the PPV. Ah, so no HHH match just yet.

– Cage match: Chris Jericho v. Christian. Jericho drags Christian in to start and gets a back elbow. He fires the chops and gets a rollup into the Walls, but Christian shoves him into the corner. Jericho keeps chopping and tries climbing off a whip into the corner, but Christian stops him, so Jericho gets a backdrop suplex for two. Jericho slaps him around and they fight over a choke, but Jericho throws more chops. Christian comes back with a backbreaker for two and climbs, but gets crotched to bring him down again. Jericho then tries climbing out, but Tyson Tomko intimidates him into staying. So he opts for a high cross from the top of the cage instead, and both guys are out. Jericho recovers first and goes for the door, but Tomko gives him a shot and gets tossed as a result. I agree with Dave Meltzer’s view of Tomko – this role was MADE for Sean O’Haire and why they fired him and brought this idiot up is beyond me. Jericho keeps crawling out the door, but Christian yanks him back in again and they slug it out. Christian backdrops him into the cage and chokes away. Christian hits the chinlock, but Jericho powers out and sends Christian into the cage, drawing blood. Jericho does the old cheesegrater job on him and springboard dropkicks him into the cage, setting up a bulldog for two. Kudos to Christian for a manly bladejob. Trish distracts Jericho long enough for Christian to try the Unprettier, and then he sends Jericho into the cage to get the move for real. That gets two. Christian climbs to the top, but gets met up there by Jericho, who brings him down with the butterfly superplex. Trish tries to charge in with a chair, but Jericho stupidly puts her in the Walls, while Christian quickly scoots over the top, but Jericho grabs him by the hair and drags him back in. They fight on top and Jericho takes him down with a spinebuster from the top, into the Walls. Christian crawls out and touches the floor, but his legs are still trapped by Jericho, so he has no choice but to tap at 11:41. And that’s that for the feud, as Jericho presumably moves onto Benoit from here. ***

The Bottom Line:

Another strong show in a series of them, with two matches already announced for next week’s show, and they’re already setting up the PPV! Meanwhile, on Smackdown, there’s three matches announced for the PPV (which is coming up this Sunday, in case you had no idea like most of America) and none of them look to be any good. I guess that shows which brand they really care about.