wrestling / TV Reports
411’s TNA Impact Report 11.30.06
-We get highlights of last week’s show.
-Goldylocks 2.0 is with LAX in the back. Konnan says they are Americans and they have rights and will use the system to their advantage. They promise to take down Angle and Williams tonight.
-Tenay and West welcome us to the show.
-Christian Cage and Tomko make their way to the ring.
-Cage says before he gets to business, he wants to introduce us to the only man he trusts in wrestling, who made a big impression on Sting last week, he is a killer, he is Tomko. Now it is time for business. TNA wants to try and screw him and make the NWA Title match a triple threat match. Maybe, just maybe, he’ll put the screws to TNA. He is the biggest star in TNA and at Turning Point, it may be him left as he will take out both men. They have something for Abyss. Abyss knows Tomko and vice versa. He tells Abyss to come out for a chat, so he and Tomko can get to know each other again.
-NWA Champion Abyss and Mitchell come out to the ramp. Mitchell holds him back.
-Cage calls him on and says he remembers Tomko.
-Sting now appears from the rafters. Nope, it is a Sting dummy. Sting is in the ring and runs off Tomko and Cage. Cage holds Tomko back. Sting has something to say to Abyss, he wants to talk to him man-to-man, and face-to-face. He wants to talk to him alone.
-We see the VKM and they threaten war. They are doing the same thing they did in WWE, nice of them to admit it. More to come later.
-Back from commercial and during the commercial LAX beat down James Storm and left him a bloody mess.
-Christopher Daniels joins the commentary team. Harris is out to bitch about LAX and Dutt and Lethal are already in the ring, they are jobbing.
X-DIVISION #1 CONTENDER’S MATCH – Jay Lethal vs. Chris Sabin vs. Sonjay Dutt
Sabin and Jay go at it, Dutt in and they beat on Sabin. They double-team Sabin, Moonsault by Jay and Sabin to the floor. Dutt trips up Jay, some counters and then they toss Sabin again. Roll up by Dutt for 2. Another for 2. Cartwheel dropkick by Jay, Sabin in and a flatliner by Jay gets 2. Dutt gets the Dragon DDT and covers for 2. Jay then gets a full nelson suplex and Sabin tosses him, covers Dutt and that is all.
That was totally under whelming and a waste of time.
Winner: Chris Sabin @ 1:57 via pin
-After the match Sabin talks junk to Daniels and Jerry Lynn is out to break that up.
-In the back LAX beats down Chris Harris now.
-Back from commercial with a Turning Point video package.
-More VKM stuff. They have a construction cone for a megaphone. They make fun of Vince, HHH and HBK as well as Big Dick Johnson. TO be continued, joy.
-Miss Brooks is in the crowd and wanting to find Eric Young.
-JB is in the TNA Spotlight zone. He hypes DVD’s, Don West SHOULD be doing this. He also hypes action figures and the PPV.
-Tenay and West discuss AJ Styles and his recent attitude change.
-Earlier today, Tenay talked with AJ. AJ says friends argue and his deal with Daniels is in the past. Tenay discusses Rhino. AJ says Rhino wants something from him and is always in his business. Tenay says Rhino wants to help and AJ doesn’t buy that. AJ says Tenay doesn’t know him. AJ says he came from crappy beginnings in a trailer and black and white TV. AJ says Tenay doesn’t know about embarrassment. Tenay says they want to help AJ, and he says he doesn’t need his help. He made himself. AJ wants to talk about wrestling. Rhino shows up and he says AJ has the wrong attitude. He doesn’t want AJ to go through stuff like he did. Rhino had a crappy life as well and he just wants to help. AJ says they keep ending up at the same place. AJ says the next time they are together, there will be trouble.
-Back from commercial with Nash and his wacky PCS deal. He is dressed as a doctor and they are all dismissed and no one tested positive for roids, but Shelley has clymidia. Nash then tells Shelley and Starr to make him proud in their match tonight. The PCS starts December 10th.
Lance Hoyt & Ron Killings vs. Austin Starr & Alex Shelley
They all brawl to begin, no entrances. Starr works the knee of Hoyt as Ron gets a spinebuster on Alex. Bog boot by Hoyt to Alex and they clear the ring. Plancha by Ron to both men. Eric Young is in the crowd and he goes to find Traci. Hoyt misses a boot, dropkick by Starr. Starr up top…Alex tags in and Ron pulls him down to the floor. Alex gets a roll up with the tights and gets the win.
BUT WAIT…Starr shows the ref the camera footage of Alex using the tights, and the decision is over turned. Wow…just wow. Killings and Hoyt dance.
Winner: Killings and Hoyt @ 2:00 via DQ
-Goldylocks 2.0 is with Brooks and Eric Young. She challenged him apparently, and Eric says it is a contest, a bikini contest. This is the start of his weight loss voyage. I guess he accepts, RUSSO-RIFFIC~!
-We get a really odd, but cool video package for Raven’s New Movement, now called “Serotonin.” They are coming soon, so we are supposed to forget that they got jobbed the fuck out already. So they are named after a monoamine neurotransmitter synthesized in serotonergic neurons in the central nervous system (CNS) and enterochromaffin cells in the gastrointestinal tract. Right.
-Back from commercial and the VKM are still at WWE Headquarters. BG is on the phone and they go to the night shoot, and they are still there. Ok. They fell asleep outside the building. They had a nightmare about Big Dick Johnson, which is what was actually shot on WWE TV. They are America’s last hope in the defense of good TV. So ironic.
-Sting is making his way out to the ring. He has a chair and a bat with him. He calls Abyss out, and he comes out as asked. Is a conversation still one on one when it is in front of like, 900 people? Sting tells Abyss to sit, and he stands. Sting says every man has his own will. For the last 4-years, Abyss has scraped and climbed the ladder, going through tacks and barbed wire. And you succeeded and won the NWA Title. He doesn’t know anything about him, and that doesn’t matter. He is a champion and great athlete. But at Genesis, you let Jim Mitchell lead you around like a puppy. Why? Are you looking for something? Or someone to lead you from the torment. PREACH ON PREACHER! Abyss sits. Or is it because you want to be your own man and champion? Is that what it is Abyss, or should I say, Chris? OMG SHOOT NAME!
-Mitchell is here laughing. He says Sting is wasting his time. The spiritual pipe dreams are just that. Sting and Abyss are one in the same, and the rage at Genesis proved that. Before Sting tries to save souls, he should save his own. Sting says Abyss should worry about himself because he makes his won choices. Sting leaves Abyss in the ring.
-Tomko and Cage attack Abyss and beat him down. TKO by Tomko on Abyss. Sting returns to make the save for Abyss. He offers Abyss his hand, Mitchell is here to stop that and slaps Sting. He and Abyss leave. Sting smiles.
-Goldylocks 2.0 is with Petey. LAX jump him…MILITANT THUGS~! Konnan asks Angle how he will fair when it is 2 on 1.
-Back from commercial and LAX is in the ring.
NWA TAG TEAM TITLE MATCH – LAX (Homicide y Hernandez) © w/Konnan vs. Kurt Angle & Petey Williams
Angle and Hernandez to start. Lock up and a headlock takedown by Angle. Hernandez to his feet, off the ropes and to the corner they go. Angle slaps Hernandez and breaks. Lock up and off the ropes, big shoulder block by Hernandez. Off the ropes and an overhead belly to belly by Angle. Hernandez back off and tags Cide in. Rights by Cide, off the ropes and a tilt a whirl back breaker by Angle. STRAPS DOWN! Angle slam stopped as Hernandez chop blocks Angle. Cide works the knee now. He chokes out Angle, tags in Hernandez and Joe is out! Joe into Angle’s corner and he is here to watch his back. Hernandez works over Angle with a rear chinlock after an overhead toss. Angle escapes and gets a back suplex on Hernandez. Joe wants the tag, Angle crawls and tags Joe. Joe and Cide in and they brawl He takes everyone out. Off the ropes and an atomic drop, yakuza and senton to Hernandez! Snap slam on Cide! Cide tries a cutter, CLUTCH BY JOE! Ankle lock by Angle on Hernandez and Cornette comes out and rings the bell as LAX taps!
Winners: NO CONTEST @ 4:20
-The LAX lawyer is here, and since Joe wasn’t a part of the match, it is a no contest.
-Joe and Angle stand in the ring, Angle offers the hand and they shake.
-We get the wrap up video to close the show.
