411s WWE Confidential Report 08.09.03

REMEMBER: IF YOU SEE AND HEAR IT HERE, I FEEL THE SOCIAL GLARE, I FEEL THE ATTITUDE
So busy. Busy weekend. No time for Confidential recap. Abbreviated recap follows. Heading from “Glass Danse” by The Faint. It’s Confidential.

SEGMENT #1: WWE IN KUWAIT
Ivory, Terri, Bradshaw and Faarooq were on a tour of military bases in Kuwait to lift troop morale and learn more about the current conflict. Mostly, learn about the current conflict. For God’s sake, if you need a wrestling show (or worse yet, a recap of a wrestling show) to tell you what’s going on in Iraq and Kuwait, you need to watch less wrestling. It’s called a newspaper, fanboy.

SEGMENT #2: MAKING OF THE SUMMERSLAM COMMERCIAL
David Sahedi and Brock Lesnar on the making of the WWE Summerslam commercial. Y’know, the one where Brock F5’s the shark. The shark was assembled by “shark wrangler” Cleve Hall. Brock was skeptical at first, but warmed to the idea of the commercial. Especially the sexy ladies.

SEGMENT #3: OUTSIDE THE ROPES: REY MYSTERIO
Josh Mathews asks Rey 10 questions. Here are the answers, in order: Yes. Jason. “Are you older than 18?” 3 seconds. No. Stereo, Radio, something in Spanish. Mighty Mouse. Yes. “It’s a party town.” “It’s all good.” “Rey, 619, Rey Mysterio…”
That’s right, 11 questions. Hooray!

SEGMENT #4: RUTHLESS AGGRESSION IN SYDNEY
Trish and Stacy tour the Melbourne Zoo to meet a kangaroo, then head to the Flaming Bull restaurant to eat kangaroo. I’m serious.

SEGMENT #5: FROM THE VAULT
Chris Jericho picks two matches, apparently just because he can. King Kong Bundy vs. S.D. Jones from Wrestlemania I, and the British Bulldogs vs. Greg “The Hammer” Valentine and Brutus Beefcake from Wrestlemania II.

SEGMENT #6: SHOUT OUTS FROM THE TROOPS
A few dozen troops in Kuwait send messages and greetings to loved ones, thanks to the WWE. That’s it, just a nice gesture.

NEXT WEEK ON CONFIDENTIAL
Gotta go. Next week, a ton of work in service of a special announcement. Take care.