411’s WWE SmackDown Report 11.25.11

Hi, hello & welcome to 411’s WWE SmackDown Report! I’m Steve Cook, and I figured that it wouldn’t fair to deprive you of some Cook on your Friday night just because there’s no 411 on Wrestling Podcast. Colin Rinehart should be back next week once the rash clears up, but tonight you’ve got me to guide you through the wonderful world of SmackDown! WWE.com hypes Sheamus & Zack Ryder vs. Dolph Ziggler & Jack Swagger, and I hear that the World Champion will be in attendance despite the injury he suffered at Survivor Series. Let’s get it started!

We open with highlights from the Big Show vs. Mark Henry match at Survivor Series. Show did a freaking top rope elbowdrop! Oh, and he broke Mizark’s ankle too. What’s next for the Big Show, Mark Henry & the World Championship?

Opening Promo

Our World Champion, Mark Henry, makes his way down to the ring with assistance from a crutch. Mark’s got a walking boot on his left foot, and it’s tough for him to get up the steps. The people act like they’re happy to see him in pain! Big Show did this to him, and they’re happy about it? What kind of people are they? Who does this kind of stuff? This is not what he deserves. He stands here hurt, but he’s not broken. They all revel in the fact that he stands here injured, because they wish they were the one that did it to him. Go ahead and clap. Big Show knows that Henry kicked him in the knee at Survivor Series, but he acted like he got hit in his private spot because he wanted to make him the bad guy. Henry’s out here to set an example for all the kids that watch him, and to show them that a champion fights through pain & injuries. He wanted to compete tonight, but Teddy Long & the doctors wouldn’t let him. He’s not only the World’s Strongest Man, he’s the World’s Toughest Man & the World Heavyweight Champion.

Well, it’s the Big Show! He’s got a smile on his face! Mark knows that the only way the title can change hands is through a pinfall or a submission. He knows where he kicked him, and he knows why he did it…so he could get disqualified. He felt the title slipping away. As far as the ankle goes, he just did to Mark what Mark did to him. Mark says there won’t be a next time, not only is Big Show the World’s Largest Athlete, he’s the World’s Largest Loser too. Show pauses, then knocks him out with the Weapon of Mass Destruction! It hardly seems fair to knock out an injured man! Show leaves, and Henry is motionless in the ring…

Wait a minute, it’s Daniel Bryan! Bryan’s cashing in!

Match 1: World Title Match
World Champion Mark Henry vs. Daniel Bryan

He rolls Henry over…eventually, covers, and we have a new World Champion!

Winner…AND NEWWWW World Champion: Daniel Bryan (:14)

Booker T: DAT MY BOY DEE BRYAN!

Bryan poses on the turnbuckles with the World Title belt, then stands on the announce table right in front of Michael Cole! Booker puts him back at the top of the Fave Five…but Teddy Long tells us to wait a minute! Mark Henry was not medically cleared to compete, so there’s no official match. Daniel’s not the World Heavyweight Champion! Daniel pauses, looks at the title belt, then hands the belt to Long, who hands it back to the champ. Long takes the briefcase from the referee, and gives it back to Bryan since the match never officially happened. Teddy will give Daniel another opportunity to earn a title shot tonight, in a Fatal 4-Way against Cody Rhodes, Wade Barrett & Randy Orton! The winner will face Mark Henry in a steel cage on next week’s special Tuesday edition of SmackDown! HOLLA.

Josh Mathews, Booker T & Michael Cole are your hosts. Cole is happy Bryan isn’t champ; Booker thinks he was robbed, and Josh has no opinion.

Match 1 (for real this time):
Justin Gabriel vs. Hunico

Josh tells us that the winner of next weeks World Title match will face Big Show at TLC. Tieup, Hunico with a headlock, series of reversals, Gabriel with an arm drag, Hunico answers with kicks & a clothesline. Off the ropes, Hunico thrown over the top, lands on the apron, slides under Gabreil & kicks him in the face, sending him to the outside! Hunico suplexes Gabriel back in for a two count. Tilt-a-whirl backbreaker by Hunico for a two count. Chinlock by Hunico! Gabriel elbows his way out, but Hunico with an Angle Slam! Legdrop gets 2! Camel Clutch! Man, he’s running through all the old-timers’ moves. Hunico whips Gabriel into the corner, springboard kicks him for a near-fall. Gabriel headscissors Hunico outside, then hits a twisting plancha! Cover gets two. Gabriel knocks Hunico down with a spinkick. Springboard moonsault gets two. Forearm by Gabriel, he places Hunico up top, but Hunico rakes at his face and knocks him off the top rope! Swanton Bomb finishes it!

Winner: Hunico (4:20, **)
Fun little sprint. Remember when Gabriel got a push for a couple minutes? Good times. If nothing else, Hunico is my favorite wrestler using the Swanton for a finish.

WWE went to Europe!

Alicia Fox joins Josh, Booker & Cole on commentary.

Match 2: Divas Tag Team Match
WWE Divas Champion Beth Phoenix & Natalya vs.AJ & Kaitlyn

Alicia notes that Beth has more muscles than Mason Ryan. I like her! It turns out that Kaitlyn thought that AJ was a bit distracted last week because of Daniel Bryan getting hurt…seems that AJ has a bit of a crush on the guy. Who could blame her? Anywho, Natalya powers Kaitlyn into the corner, then knees her in the midsection. Natalya misses a running charge, Kaitlyn lands a strike then takes Natalya into the Chickbuster corner. Kaitlyn whips AJ into Natalya, AJ with a big kick, head scissors, off the ropes, Natalya goes for a Glam Slam but AJ rolls through for a two count. Natalya yanks AJ down by the hair, puts her in the Sharpshooter, and it’s over.

Winners: Beth Phoenix & Natalya (1:08, NR)
Well that didn’t take long.

Kaitlyn’s all like “WUT DA HELL” , and leaves AJ to get massacred by the Divas of Destruction. Natalya puts AJ in the Sharpshooter while Beth mocks her on the microphone…Alicia leaves the announce table & Beth & Natalya decide to hit the bricks. Poor AJ. If she needs any assistance, she can contact me @OFF_FF or facebook.com/scook411.

What?

Hey, Kane’s mask is En Fuego!

Teddy Long talks on the phone about how SmackDown’s gonna be live next week. The cheesy music & lighting hits, and it’s Aksana! There’s no way any live crowd can be that happy to see her on screen, well at least not on a PG show. Aksana’s flirting gets interrupted when Mark Henry barges in asking Teddy why he has to defend his title next week. Teddy says that the show next week is huge, and Mark’s doctor says he’ll be ok then. Mark expresses outrage over Teddy picking on him because he’s hurt, and future retribution is insinuated.

Sheamus tells Zack Ryder that he already signed his petition. Ryder tries to re-mix Sheamus’s theme music to poor results. Sheamus says they should concentrate on beating Ziggler & Swagger, then they can go out and celebrate.

Ryder: WOO WOO WOO

Sheamus: You know it.

Match 3: Tag Team Match
US Champion Dolph Ziggler & Jack Swagger (w/Vickie Guerrero) vs. Zack Ryder & Sheamus

Vickie wants everybody to stand up and show their respect & appreciation for Dolph Ziggler winning twice at Survivor Series. Dolph talks about how the people have to worry about double chins & double mortgages, they don’t know what it’s like to go to Survivor Series & be double victorious. It’s not just showing off, it was him making history. #HEEL

Sheamus & Ziggler start. Tieup, Sheamus forces Dolph into the ropes. Tieup again, headlock by Sheamus, off the ropes, dropkick by Dolph! I think Dolph went to the Chris Hero School of Showboating. Headlock takeover by Sheamus. Off the ropes, Dolph misses the dropkick that time, Sheamus picks him up and hits a fallaway slam! Swagger tags in. Gobehind by Swagger, Sheamus elbows out, then pounds on Swagger against the ropes. Swagger gets clotheslined over the top, Dolph gets tossed out, then Ryder flip dives onto both of them!

After a commercial, Ryder is wailing away on Swagger. Off the ropes, forearm by Ryder gets two. Ryder whips Swagger into a battering ram from Sheamus for two. Off the ropes, Swagger with a chop block! He tackles Sheamus down and tags in the Zig Zag Man. Dolph’s all over Sheamus here, kicking & elbowing the man down. Tag to Swagger, with more of the same treatment for Sheamus. Slam by Swagger…Vader Bomb gets nothing but knees! Clothesline & both men are down…tag to Ryder! Clotheslines, whip reversed, Ryder kicks Swagger, Swagger down in the corner…Broski Boot! Vickie tries to distract the ref but to no avail. Ryder & Swagger on the outside, and Dolph runs over to eat a clothesline from Ryder! Swagger with a clothesline of his own on Ryder! Cover back in the ring gets two. Tag to Ziggler, Ryder with a rollup gets two, but Ziggler hits a big elbow drop for two. Arm bar! Ryder fights out, Ziggler with a boot & a neck breaker! Nip up by Ziggler and some showboating. Tag to Swagger, he punches Ryder down. Ryder tries to elbow his way out of the corner, but no success. Ziggler with a double-team Rocker Dropper for two! Ziggler holds Ryder for a stomp from Swagger. Slam by Swagger, he’s going for that Vader Bomb again, and he hits it this time for a two count. Ziggler tags in, gets rolled up by Ryder but lands a dropkick for a two count. They tease the tag to Sheamus, but Dolph pulls him away & tags in Swagger. Swagger knocks Sheamus off the apron and Sheamus is angry! Ryder gets beat down while the referee escorts Sheamus out of the ring. Ryder reaches for the tag again, but Swagger drives him into the corner & shoulder blocks away. Ryder fights back…Tornado DDT on Swagger! Tag to Sheamus! Irish Hammers on Swagger, Ziggler beat down in the corner, clothesline to Ziggler! Swagger blocks the attempted Celtic Cross on Ziggler, but gets Brogue Kicked for his trouble! Ryder seems to have tagged in…Ziggler tries a Zig Zag on Sheamus but gets tossed off! Ruff Ryder! 3 count!

Winners: Zack Ryder & Sheamus (13:22, ***)
Fine effort here from everybody involved, some good old fashioned tag team action that had good teases on the hot tag. Ryder pins Ziggler again, continuing that issue.

I never noticed how similar Ryder & Sheamus’s hair was before.

Daniel Bryan tells AJ about how he’s dreamed about being World Champion his whole life, and how disappointed he is that it was taken away so quickly. AJ reminds him that he still has the Money in the Bank briefcase, and he has a chance at another shot tonight. He can do this! Wade Barrett tells Daniel that he’ll get plenty more chances…just not tonight. Has he witnessed anything the Barrett Barrage has accomplished? AJ says that nobody cares, and Wade is shocked that Daniel has a 14 year old girl fighting his battles for him. Daniel points out that Wade’s won the same number of World Championships he has. Nobody’s fighting his battles for him, he’s not intimidated by Mark Henry or Wade. Wade saunters off, AJ wishes Daniel good luck and pecks him on the cheek. Daniel is pleased and motivated.

Match 4: Singles Match
Ted DiBiase vs. Heath Slater

Thousands showed up this afternoon for the DiBiase Posse party, where they deep-fried a turkey! The bell rings, but we’re interrupted by a Jinder Mahal promo! Mahal talks about how Ted’s forsaken his wealth & family to hang out with the commoners. I guess Jinder doesn’t approve. Slater attacks from behind and has a brief flurry of offense, but Ted responds with the old ten-punch in the corner. Vertical suplex gets two. DiBiase with big punches while Booker compares DiBiase to Tim Tebow. Slater rams DiBiase shoulder-first into the ringpost, a single-arm DDT gets two. Arm wringer by Slater, another single-arm DDT gets two. Arm bar by Slater, DiBiase fights out, but Slater takes him back down with a hammerlock. Another arm bar by Slater, DiBiase fights back, and a back body drop by Ted, atomic drop, clothesline, another clothesline gets two. Big clothesline from DiBiase. Dream Street!

Winner: Ted DiBiase (5:00, *½)
Kind of a dull effort here, lots of boring arm work from Slater that didn’t lead anywhere, and it’s tough to care about a prospective Jinder Mahal feud. It didn’t help that Cole went off-topic halfway through the match to start burying the other two announcers as he usually does. I think Vince yells stuff in Cole’s headset when he gets bored.

DiBiase Tebows!

Raw featured Cody Rhodes throwing water in Booker T’s face! Everyone thinks that Cody threw water in the face of a six-time champion and a former King of the Ring…no, he threw water in the face of a lowly commentator. He did it because it was his match, and he saw the mocking look on Booker’s face. He did something about it. He’s free without the mask to get revenge on Randy Orton, defend the IC title, win the Fatal 4-Way and go on to become World Champion. The world is his oyster. As a mentally-limited commentator might say: he can dig that, sucka.

Match 5: Fatal 4-Way #1 Contenders Match
Daniel Bryan vs. Randy Orton vs. Intercontinental Champion Cody Rhodes vs. Wade Barrett

How much do the rights to Final Countdown cost? I dig the “Smoke & Mirrors” re-mix for Cody. Orton & Barrett go at it right at the bell, as do Bryan & Rhodes. Orton & Barrett take center stage in the ring while Bryan & Rhodes head outside. Whip reversed, Orton bounces off the corner & clotheslines Barrett down! Big knee drop from Orton gets two. Cody eats a dropkick from Orton, then Bryan delivers a big kick. Bryan with a flying kick in the corner, and it’s Orton & Bryan in the ring for what may be the first time…

But when we come back Cody & Wade have the advantage on them. Barrett tosses Orton to the outside, and whips him into the steel steps! Meanwhile, Cody front suplexes Bryan. Wade back in and they take turns stomping & punching Bryan. Double elbow block sends Bryan down. Orton comes back in and punches away on both of them while Bryan rolls outside. Kick to the gut by Barrett. Orton escapes a pump handle slam attempt, but Cody meets him with a Russian leg sweep. Wade mounts & punches Orton, and Orton gets the same treatment that Bryan got earlier. Bryan back in with a missile dropkick on Barrett! Flying clothesline for Rhodes! Kicks in the corner on Rhodes, Rhodes gets placed up top…Bryan follows him up but Wade gets him in the Electric Chair…Doomsday Device! Wade covers, but Cody breaks it up and tosses him shoulder-first into the ringpost!

Orton suplexes Cody for a two count when we return. Wade & Randy go at it…Wade elbows him in the corner, knees him on the ropes, and kicks him down onto the apron! Bryan runs at Barrett for a clothesline, but ends up eating a Boss Man Slam! Cody breaks up the count and kicks Wade outside. Beautiful Disaster on Bryan gets two! Cody knocks Randy off the apron, but gets back dropped to the floor by Bryan! Wade whips Bryan off the ropes, but Bryan ducks the clothesline and hits a suicide dive on Cody! Orton with a series of clotheslines on Barrett, and powerslams him down! Cody gets sent back outside, Wade eats an Orton backbreaker, Bryan breaks up the count and kicks Orton’s head off! Cody breaks up that count, and Hot Shots Bryan! Cody covers Randy for the two count, then stomps away on him. Front suplex on Orton, Rhodes heads up top…Orton crotches him! Big punch, Orton follows him up…superplex! Wade kicks Orton and covers Rhodes, but Bryan breaks that up with a flying head butt! Everybody’s down! Well, now Orton’s up. Orton tosses Barrett out & tosses Rhodes out! Bryan eats a rope-assisted DDT! Orton pounds on the canvas, but Wade pulls him out & DDTs him on the floor! Cody covers for a two count, but Bryan reverses out of the pin attempt…LeBell Lock! Cody taps out!

Winner: Daniel Bryan (11:51, ***½)
Another solid effort from everybody involved here. Everybody was on point and there‘s nothing I can really complain about. Of course, I am a bit of a Daniel Bryan mark so I may be biased.

Cody is unhappy, and attacks Bryan from behind! He stomps away on Bryan, but Orton sneaks up from behind & hits the RKO! Play his music for a second, then play Daniel’s again! Will Daniel Bryan pull off the biggest miracle in WWE history? Tune in next Tuesday!

So long & good night, everybody!