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Reviewing The Rumbles: 2010
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2010: The Drama
The very best Rumbles are the ones that have at least one marquee tale to tell and handle it deftly. Both 2004 and 1992 told the story of an underdog’s journey to a championship. Other great Rumbles can be fluidly broken down into story-telling segments where noteworthy events come one after another, not unlike the 2001 iteration that stands as my lone 10/10. Some Rumbles manage to do both…
The Participants
1. Dolph Ziggler
2. Evan Bourne
3. CM Punk
4. JTG
5. The Great Khali
6. Beth Phoenix
7. Zack Ryder (This is before anyone cared, though)
8. HHH
9. Drew McIntyre (I am reminded how much I despised this guy during his WWE run. I thought the McIntyre character was dreadfully boring)
10. Ted DiBiase
11. John Morrison
12. Kane
13. Cody Rhodes
14. MVP
15. Carlito
16. The Miz
17. Matt Hardy
18. Shawn Michaels
19. John Cena
20. Shelton Benjamin
21. Yoshi Tatsu
22. Big Show (22! Why, that’s practically #1 for Show!)
23. Mark Henry
24. Chris Masters
25. R-Truth
26. Jack Swagger
27. Kofi Kingston
28. Chris Jericho
29. Edge (enormously surprising entrant)
30. Batista
Final Four
4th – Shawn Michaels (eliminated by Batista)
3rd – Batista (eliminated by Cena)
2nd – Cena (eliminated by Edge)
WINNER – Edge
Notes/Thoughts
-The Pre-match video features Shawn and his obsession with facing The Undertaker again at WrestleMania. After Shawn and Taker had a legitimate Best WrestleMania Match Ever candidate at WM25, WWE simply had to have them face off again. So we were given a story about how the defeat was driving Shawn all-but insane for a year. ‘Taker wasn’t willing to simply grant Shawn a second ‘Mania match (who does Shawn think he is? Kane?), so Shawn would need to win the Royal Rumble to get another match against the World Heavyweight Champion Undertaker. Kane pops into tell Shawn that wanting to face Undertaker twice at WrestleMania is like putting a death sentence on your career (says the guy who’s been around for almost 20 years), and then Triple-H comes in to tell Shawn he’ll have to find another way since HE intends to win the match.
-The crowd sits on their hands for the opening of Bourne and Ziggler, despite both guys hitting their finisher before their 90 seconds of alone time is up.
-#3 is CM Punk, who gets to have the one of the best sprees in Royal Rumble history. He makes short work of Ziggler and Bourne (without their looking TOO weak for it since they each already ate a finisher, but it still makes Punk look great for getting two guys out basically right away. Solid booking!), and starts cutting one his pseudo-Jesus Straight Edge Society promos at the crowd. JTG interrupts, but is quickly vanquished, and Punk goes back to his microphone.
-Khali comes out to neutralize Punk at #5, but Punk has a great cowardly heel moment of trying to “save” Khali and convert him to the SES. Khali raises his hand in pledge… but then brings it down on Punk’s skull.
-Beth Phoenix is up next, and she looks to be gently set over the top rope by Khali. But she reaches in to kiss him, then powers him out in the same fashion that Benoit had done to Big Show 6 years prior. She starts to try to work on a beat-up Punk, but he reverses into a GTS and then dumps her. It doesn’t sound like much, but I’m relatively sure that Beth survives longer in one Rumble showing than Chyna did in two combined!
-Okay, I feel like I’m just play-by-playing Punk’s early run here, but Ryder is out next. Punk teases inducting him into the society, but stops short to just clobber him with the microphone instead before pitching him. At this point, the crowd is full on chanting “CM PUNK!” despite the fact that this is Punk at his absolute most despicable and villainous. He’s that good. After that, HHH is out, and you can tell things are about to get more difficult for Punk. Probably the biggest downside to this Rumble is that Punk does all that work to this point, and HHH would just toss him shortly after the next guy up hits the ring. Felt like they should have given Punk a better run for his work, but it was still a solid tenure.
-Legacy is still together at this point, and that’s like an eternity in wrestling time (they wouldn’t break up for 3 more months, either, at WrestleMania 26).
-Kane enters the Rumble (at #12) and decimates everyone! Brand new booking ideas!
-In a Miz/MVP angle that I seriously don’t remember AT ALL, Miz assaults MVP en route to the ring, instantly causing Matt Striker to declare that “Miz just cost MVP his shot at WrestleMania!” before the attack is even over. How does he know how badly MVP is hurt? Two rounds later, Miz is buzzed in, and MVP makes an apparent miraculous recovery to run-in and flip them both over the top. So apparently they had a feud over the US strap? Or something? I guess?
-Michaels hits the action like a dynamo, and makes short work out of petulant midcarders (Carlito, Cody, Morrison, Ted, and McIntyre) so that he is left alone with Triple-H.
-Cena is out next, and he has a decent bout with D-X. At one point, he gets them both down and does double You Can’t See Me. I’m positive he’s done this several times in his career (including at No Mercy this year to Styles and Ambrose), but this is the first instance I think I can recall seeing it, so it was neat. Trips recovers quickly to land a Pedigree, but then Shawn superkicks his partner out. Desperate Shawn HAS TO WIN!
-The fans hate Cena’s prompt elimination of Shelton Benjamin, who dares to try to horn in on the main event talent.
-Very entertaining flurry between Big Show, Shawn, and Cena, in which they forgo the whole seemingly-inevitable “Shawn and John team up on the big guy” bit, and all three guys attack each other equally. Just a solid little bit of action here.
-Mark Henry and Big Show brawl too close to the ropes, and friggin’ R-TRUTH of all people simul-tosses them. Little Jimmy’s proudest moment.
-Up to #27, I note that this has been a great Rumble with a lot of fast-paced action and great mini-segments (Punk, HHH/Cena/Shawn, HHH/Cena/Show).
-At #29, Edge has the best surprise return from injury ever, as the arena ERUPTS for him. His former-partner-turned-mortal-enemy Chris Jericho is fresh in the ring and delivers just a classic “OH SHIT” look. To look at Edge, he must have substantially bumped this return up as hard as he could because he is not in the best of shape, but who cares? It’s Edge, and it’s great.
-For the first time ever, we have a Final Four before #30 is even buzzed because only Shawn, Edge, and Cena are left shortly after Edge’s arrival.
-Fantastic drama sell from Michaels when he is eliminated by Batista (and the elimination is SO well done because you could legitimately watch it and think it was a botch based on both mens’ reaction). Shawn is the absolute master of drama–you 100% buy his devastation over his elimination–and he flips his shit after it, attacking everyone. Has there ever been a better story-teller in professional wrestling than Shawn when he’s on his game?
-Edge gets Cena out quickly to win the match, and yeah… I’m thinking he really rushed back ahead of schedule because he wasn’t tasked with doing too much on his own here. But it’s all worth it for the moment.
Rankings
1. 2001 (Austin III) – 10/10
2. 2010 (Edge) – 9/10
3. 2004 (Benoit) – 9/10
4. 1992 (Flair) – 9/10
5. 2007 (The Undertaker) – 8/10
6. 1997 (Austin I) – 8/10
7. 1998 (Austin II) – 8/10
8. 2008 (Cena I) – 7/10
9. 2002 (HHH I) – 7/10
10. 2005 (Batista I) – 6/10
11. 2003 (Lesnar) -5/10
12. 1989 (Studd) – 5/10
13. 1996 (Michaels II) – 5/10
14. 1999 (McMahon) 5/10
15. 1993 (Yokozuna) – 4/10
16. 1990 (Hogan I) – 4/10
17. 1994 (Hart/Luger) – 4/10
18. 2009 (Orton) – 4/10
19. 1991 (Hogan II) – 3/10
20. 2006 (Mysterio) – 3/10
21. 2000 (The Rock) – 3/10
22. 1995 (Michaels I) – 2/10
23. 1988 (Duggan) – 2/10
