Tremendous Tirades Throwback: TNA Final Resolution 2005

Tenay and West welcome us.

PYRO!

Franchise is with JJ! JJ says if it Nash, he doesn’t care who it is! He says DDP brings nothing, Monty is a Double A ball player and he has bitten off more than he can chew. He says Nash may be big, but he is nothing flat on his back. JJ says he earned the right to call himself the King of the Mountain. He says Dusty’s plan has backfired, and this is his world, Planet Jarrett!

Match #1 Michael Shane, Kazarian and Daniels vs. The 3LK (Konnan, James and Killings)

Daniels has the Fallen Angel Robe back!

Konnan goes retro with his mic work, but the crowd loves it! James turn! I am still entertained by him.

Daniels and Konnan to start. Lock up as they chant for Daniels, arm bar by Konnan, reversal and Konnan takes Daniels down. Nice reversal/mat work here and Daniels grabs a leg lock, reversal and a shoulder block to Daniels. Off the ropes and a clothesline to Daniels. Shane in and a slam to Shane. James in…NIZZIE LEG DROP to Shane by Killings! Right hands by Killings to Shane, and Killings in control. Off the ropes, split and a clothesline by Killings. Jawbreaker by Shane and a tag to Kaz. Drop toehold by Killings, tag to James. Dancing double punches to Kaz, they dance and then kick the shit out of Kaz! Arm bar to Kaz, and James takes him down. Kaz gets a tag, but Shane was in the wrong corner. Arm bar still by James and Kaz almost gets the tag again, but no. Kaz rakes the eyes and James chases him and a tag to Daniels and Kaz takes James down. They double-team James and Daniels takes him off the ropes and levels him. Tag to Kaz who gets a clothesline to James. Shane tagged in and right hands to James. Triple–team in the corner and Daniels back in. RANA reversed into a power bomb by James! Tag to Kaz and Killings. Killings takes them all down with right hands! Ax kick to Shane! Covers and Daniels saves him. YAKUZA kick by Kaz and every one is in! Face buster by Konnan, Shane and Konnan clothesline each other! All 6 are down! They all pair off and right hands are flying. Kaz to the floor, Daniels to the floor! Shane gets a reverse DDT by Konnan and kicks out! Kaz takes Killings to the floor, and Daniels is in. Split legged moonsault and he hits Kaz! Konnan and James grab Shane, Killing with the sidekick finished it!

Winners: The 3LK @ 14:23 ***

Traci and Trinity are with Dusty, there is a contest to stay in TNA between them and Fairplay. They have to search for clues in Universal. Fairplay makes fun of Dusty. Dusty smacks Traci’s ass. Dusty dogs on Fairplay.

Match #2 “Primetime” Elix Skipper vs. Sonjay Dutt

Lock up and Elix with an arm bar. Reversal and Dutt with a headlock but Elix shoves him off. Lock up and Elix takes Dutt to the corner. Dutt on top, and rolls off and gets a roll up on Elix for 2. Another and another 2. Head scissors with like 3 rotations by Dutt and Elix to the floor. Baseball slide to Elix, and Dutt follows out and Elix tosses him over the rail. Dutt up and springs off the guardrail and flies onto Elix. Back in the ring and Dutt with a 2 count. Headlock by Dutt and Elix escapes. Arm bar to Elix and Dutt wrenches on his arm. Dutt to the apron…springs in and a drop kick to Elix’s arm and gets 2. Dutt grabs the arm and Elix is hurt. Stunner like move to Elix’s arm and he is in trouble. Dutt up top…ELIX RUNS AND LEAPS TO THE TOP AND DROP KICKS DUTT TO THE FLOOR! TNA! TNA! Elix to the floor…and rams Dutt to the apron, then again. Dutt sat on the railing…spin kick by Elix and he kind of catches the rail and still hits Dutt. Dutt rolled back in and Elix covers for 2. Grabs Dutt’s arm and SLAMS him down. Stiff kick to Dutt in the back, misses another but hits on the way back. Cover and gets 2. Tries the play of the day, reversal and lionsault but Dutt but he eats knees! Elix picks him up and a gut wrench suplex to Dutt. Off the ropes, Elix to the apron…but flips in and gets a clothesline to Dutt. Elix with knees to Dutt, then sets him on top…Elix goes up…Dutt fights…SUNSET FLIP POWER BOMB TO ELIX! Both are down and fight up…right hands by Dutt then running elbows to Elix. Back suplex by Dutt for 2! Right hands by Dutt, tilt a whirl and Dutt with a tornado DDT for 2! Dutt goes up top…Misses the Hindu press, rolls through…Elix with a SPINNING Rock Bottom variation finishes it!

Winners: Elix Skipper @ 10:12 ***½

Promo for the new guy, looks cool at least.

Nash with DDP, they talk about the matches. Nash says they work together, but DDP says no, this is not the N W O. He says they take out Brown, and then face off like gentlemen. DDP says he doesn’t trust him, Nash says if he hits him, the deal is off. DDP is still not sure.

Kid Kash/Dustin Rhodes promo video.

Match #3 Kid Kash vs. Dustin Rhodes

Kash attacks at the bell, but Dustin with a clothesline. Kash to the floor and Dustin is on fire. Kash in with kicks to Dustin and off the ropes…elbow by Dustin. Sling shot to Kash as he eats the ropes. Dustin up top? Kash knocks him off…right hands and goes up… Dustin tosses him off and Kash holds his knee. Dustin attacks and the ref keeps him away as Kash holds his knee. Don’t but it Dustin…LOW BLOW BY KASH! SWERVE! Drop kick to Dustin’s knee by Kash. Elbow to the knee of Dustin and he locks it up and tries to take Dustin apart. He slaps Dustin now, and right hands by Dustin. Drop kick by Kash to the knee again. Spinning toehold by Kash. Dustin with right hands escapes, back slide to Kash gets 2. Kash with another low blow, and then shoves the ref. Spinning toehold again, but Dustin with a roll up for 2. Kash clips his knee, and wraps his leg in the ropes and kicks away at it. Kash pulls on his leg now, and then right hands to Dustin. Dustin is down and Kash with a knee drop on his knee. Another and then the frog splash to Dustin’s knee! Figure four by Kash! Dustin with right hands and tries to escape, but Kash pulls back and locks it in further. Dustin tries to turn it…and does! Kash fights and releases it. Kash kicks the knee of Dustin but Dustin with a sleeper hold! Reversal, Kash with a sleeper! Dustin is down and Kash still has it locked in. Ref checks and Kash says he is done. Arm check…1….2…NO! Dustin is fighting still. Up and elbows out. Right hands back and forth…Clothesline to Kash and another by Dustin! Right hands, drop down punch by Dustin. Atomic drop by Dustin, but his knee went out. Kash up top…Cross body, roll through and Dustin gets 2! Kash misses a kick…curtain call reversed, spin kick and Kash gets a CLOSE 2! Kash shoves the ref, the ref shoves back! BULLDOG by Dustin and that is all!

Winner: Dustin Rhodes @ 10:53 ***¼

Fairplay says the 2 bimbos cannot beat him. He finds Dusty’s hat and mocks Dusty. He found the clue!

Video package about Monty almost beating JJ, Nash’s and DDP’s want of the title and how the match was made.

Raven vs. Erik Watts video package.

Match #4 Raven vs. Erik Watts

I miss the Lord of the Rings Helmet. Watts is out with a chair.

Raven attacks right away as he gets in the ring. Choke by Raven, and off the ropes…drop toehold and Watts to the floor. Watts to the railing, as the crowd wants one more time. Russian leg sweep into the railing now, and Raven back in and breaks the count. Right hands by Raven, and Watts head first into the railing. Back in the ring, and Raven scrapes his face with his boot repeatedly. Right hands by Raven and Watts is rocking…clothesline by Raven and Watts is down, cover and a 2 count. Watts sent to the floor and Raven follows. Slams his head onto the apron and Raven chokes out Watts. Back in and Watts with a back elbow to Raven, then a mule kick and Raven to the floor. Watts follows and takes Raven down. They fight on the ramp, and Watts brings him back down. In the ring and Watts pulls him back out and Russian leg sweep to the rail by Watts. Watts looks blown up and struggling. Back in the ring and Watts calls for the choke slam…grabs him…choke slam to Raven. Watts yells at him, then goes to the floor and gets the chair. The ref grabs the chair, LOW BLOW to Watts! Raven up, grabs the chair…wedges it in the corner…and Watts head first into the chair. Drop toehold of doom, Watts stops it, reversal but Watts eats it. Raven grabs him…Watts fights back with right hands. Watts grab the chair…kick to Raven then right hands. Watts mounts him in the corner and Raven with an atomic drop and gets 2. Right hands by Raven…but Watts stops him. Power bomb into the corner by Watts gets 2. Tries the Choke slam, reversal…ankle lock by Raven! Watts rolls out and SUPER KICK by Raven gets 2! Clothesline flips Watts around! Watts with a drop toehold…STF! OH MY GAWD STF! Raven reverses and gets the ankle lock again. Watts fight out and the world’s worst choke slam by Watts. Tries again and a good one and Raven is done!

Winner: Erik Watts @ 10:20 (ASS)

Raven tells Watts he is sorry, and he says he let his hate of DDP blind him, and he is sorry. He respects Watts for his family and friends. He is sorry. Then he attacks Watts with a trashcan! He tossed Watts off the stage.

They hype the new Impact schedule.

Here comes Piper.

Match #5 Scott Hall vs. Jeff Hardy: Rowdy Roddy Piper Special Ref

ELVIS SCOTT HALL IS HERE!

Piper does a police check on Hall and finds something! West makes a joke about Hall being used to a search. He pulls out a chain now! Piper is great! Hall searches Piper now! Hall finds handcuffs on Hall!

Here we go! Hardy with a duck under and slaps Hall. Hall down again and Hardy surfs on him? Kick by Hardy, and up top…whisper in the wind moonsault by Hardy! Hall takes him down now, and catches him…fall away slam by Hall. Cover and a slow 2 by Piper. Hardy with a rollup and a faster count for 2. Another roll up and another quickie by Piper. Hall on the floor and Hardy with a baseball slide. Plancha by Hardy! Hall slammed off the steel steps. Back in the ring…leg drop to Hall’s nizzies. Hall escapes the flat liner and elbows away at Hardy. Corner clothesline by Hall, and another. The Hardy party is annoying as Hall levels Hardy again. Deathlock variation by Hall, and pulls Hardy’s dreads. Piper breaks it up and a choke slam by Hall for 2. Hall slaps Hardy, then throws him into Piper! WE HAVE A PIPER DOWN! Hall undoes the turnbuckle and gets KNUX! PIPER grabs then and EYE POKE! Twist of fate! Hardy up top…Swanton finishes it.

Winner: Jeff Hardy @ 5:50 (BALLS)

Hardy says he will whip JJ’s ass. Piper says he will get his shot, and says Hardy is the next champ. ABYSS IS HERE! HOLY SHIT! TORTURE RACK BOMB! He levels security as Tenay says he isn’t even on the roster!

Traci hits on some guy in an attempt to find a clue. Trinity is here, and then tricks Traci to leave. The dude has no clue, so Trinity is pissy.

Match #6 Winner to face JJ later: Monty Brown vs. Kevin Nash vs. DDP

Nash is all business, as he has his traditional ring gear on, no Elvis suit for Nash. Nash even dyed the hair!

DDP and Brown lock up…headlock by DDP, reversal and Brown tosses him off. Lock up again…arm bar by DDP, tries a cutter but shoved away again. Nash claps for DDP and Brown says he wants him! Brown and DDP lock up again…shoulder block to DDP and he goes to the floor. Back in and he talks with Nash, and Nash is up for it. Lock up and Nash and Brown are at a stalemate…but Brown gets Nash back to the corner and a clean break. Nash mocks Brown, then they lock up and Nash takes him to the corner but Brown fights out and takes Nash down. Nash pulls him back and Brown eats the turnbuckle. Right hands to Brown, then a back elbow and DDP sits back and watches. Sidewalk slam to Brown for 2. Knees by Nash in the corner, then a headlock. Back suplex to Nash and Brown is up and Nash to the floor. Pin, submission or over the top to win BTW. Clothesline to Brown by DDP and then the spinning clothesline for 2. DDT by Brown and he gets 2 as Nash breaks it up. They double-team Brown in the corner and then Nash charges DDP and DDP ELIMINATES NASH OVER THE TOP! Nash tries to swerve DDP! Brown has DDP…running power slam…NO! DIAMOND CUTTER but Nash pulls DDP out! Slams DDP into the ring post and rolls him back in. Small package by Brown and he gets 2. Roll up by DDP and he gets 2. Clothesline by Brown for 2! DDP is pissed. Knee by Brown…then clubbing shots to the back of DDP, covers and gets 2. Corner clothesline by Brown and DDP is down. DDP to the corner and another clothesline. Fall away slam to DDP. Power slam by Brown gets 2. Chops by Brown, DDP with a shot to Brown…tries a Diamond cutter, reversal by Brown, off the ropes…POOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUNCE! THAT IS IT!

Winner: Monty Brown @ 9:45 **

Brown helps up DDP and they shake after the match.

Match #7 America’s Most Wanted (James Storm and Chris Harris) vs. Team Canada © (Eric Young and Bobby Rude) w/Coach D’Amore

AMW attacks Team Canada as they talk with Coach! They fight on the ramp and Harris levels Rude! Young with a suplex to Storm on the ramp. Harris rams Rude to the railing and Storm with a swank head scissors on the ramp to Young! Coach is pissed as Harris drops Rude throat first on the railing. Rams Rude head first onto the railing and Storm has control on Young and rams him to the steel! Young in the ring and Harris waits for him. Harris repeatedly levels Young who has a big knot on his head and Harris tosses Young to the floor! Young in, clothesline by Harris and Young wants no more as he rolls to the floor and they get a close up of Young’s big ass knot! Harris goes outside and brings him back in. Left hands by Harris and tag to Storm…double toss on Rude onto Young! Team Canada to the floor and they pick up Young and toss him crotch first onto Rude on the floor! Rude back in as Storm tossed Young into the rail again, but Rude in control now. Storm with a backdrop though and gets a roll up for 2. Young nails Storm and Rude drills him and Team Canada slows it down and gets control as Young comes back in. Crowd HOT AS HELL for this match! Young chokes out Storm, and then the Coach gets a cheap shot. Rude sneaks in without the tag and gets a 2 count on Storm. Suplex by Rude and he gets another 2. Storm fights up, but Rude pulls him down again and then tags Young. Double-team kicks to Storm, and he is in trouble as Young lays in some stiff right hands. Side back breaker by Young gets 2. Tag to Rude, and he brutally clubs away at Storm. Harris rushes in, but that allows Team Canada to double-team Storm. Chops by Rude, but Storm gets a kick in and then an ENZIGURI! One to Young on the apron and a FLAIR FLOP TO THE FLOOR! Rude takes out Harris and NO TAG for you! Young with the elbow from the top for 2! Snap mare to Strom then a side headlock on the mat by Young. Storm with elbows, sunset flip gets 2 for Storm. Tag to Rude, and a high knee drop gets 2. Rear neck vice by Rude, and Coach sings OHHHHHHHH CAAAAAAAAANNNNNNADA! Rude pulls back and the crowd is behind Storm. Slam by Rude, and Storm reverses a back suplex, then Rude misses a charge and eats the steel post! TAG TO HARRIS! Left hands for Team Canada! Bulldog to Young! Rude in, and he throws Rude into Young, full nelson slam to Rude! Lariat to Young! Stalling suplex on Young…down and Harris covers for 2! Storm with a power slam to Rude for 2! Harris goes up top…they set for the Death Sentence… Young up top with Harris…Storm over now…TOWER OF DOOM and they nail Rude! All 4 men are down! Storm covers Rude and gets 2. SUPER KICK TO RUDE! Cover 1…2…D’AMORE BREAKS IT UP! AMW corners Coach! They handcuff him to the steel posts! COACH IS CRAZY PISSED! Young off the ropes…HEART ATTACK! 1…2…NO! Young kicks out! They set for the Death Sentence again…Devine is out! Harris chases him and Rude KILLS HARRIS! Devine KILLS Storm with the Hockey Stick! Young covers 1…2…KICK OUT BY STORM! Devine has what is left of the stick…SPINE BUSTER ON DEVINE! Rude in…AMW WITH THE POWER PLEX! 1…2…NO! RUDE KICKS OUT! Young takes Storm to the floor as the crowd chants BULLSHIT! CATATONIC TO YOUNG! Devine slides a chair in…NORTHERN LARIAT TO HARRIS and he eats chair…1…2…FOOT ON THE ROPES! Team Canada is PISSED! Devine has the chair, reversal in the ring and DEVINE NAILS YOUNG! Harris covers…1…2…3! NEW CHAMPS!

AWESOME MATCH!

Winners: America’s Most Wanted 19:10 ****

Traci and Trinity beat Fairplay’s ass and steal the clue, then they fight. They each have half a clue. Dusty tells them to bring him a tag team, and the one who brings the best wins. They can’t have worked for TNA though. Fairplay whines like a bitch in the background.

Ultimate X Preview.

Match #8 Ultimate X VI: AJ Styles vs. Chris Sabin vs. Petey Williams © w/Coach D’Amore

Here we go! They stare down, and wild rights by all 3 men. Williams with a right hand to Sabin, and then to AJ. Williams off the ropes, then goes to the floor. Sabin chases, Williams back in and AJ with a right hand, now Sabin and Williams to the corner. Double-team by AK and Sabin…fore arm in the corner by AJ to Williams. Drop kick by Sabin to Williams! AJ and Sabin lock up and reversal series, AJ down, kip up, Sabin tries to climb but AJ pulls him down. Boot to Sabin by AJ, and AJ springs in to grab the cables and misses. Sabin to the floor, works on Williams and AJ runs and DIVES onto both men! AJ back in the ring and climbs up to the cables. Sabin in and up top as well. They duke it out and they stand up top…DROP KICK TO AJ who bounces off the steel guard! Sabin lands safely and climbs up top. He scales the cables and Coach is in to stop him! Williams in and crotches Sabin, Ref Mike Posey KICKS OUT COACH D’AMORE! NA NA NA NA! NA NA NA NA! HEY HEEEEEEY HEY! GOOOOOOOD BYE! Williams and Coach are pissed and he is gone now. Williams back to the ring and pulls AJ out and rams him into the rail. Suplex to Sabin, rolling into another and Triple chants now! Williams knocks AJ back down, and Sabin now fights back. Chops to Williams, but Williams takes out his knees and SHARP SHOOTER! SHARP SHOOTER ON SABIN! AJ in and climbs up and scales the cables but Williams is up and pulls him down. Williams knocks Sabin to the floor, and grabs AJ. Right hands to AJ and TREE OF WOE! Williams climbs up and stands on AJ’s balls! Sabin crawls back in but Williams keeps him on the apron and kicks away at him. AJ with right hands to Williams, PELE KICK to Williams! Sabin climbs up the structure and AJ pulls him off and tries, Sabin pulls him back off and he is up and climbs. AJ grabs him…Sabin is on his shoulders…. Williams scales the cables…RANA ON SABIN WHO WAS ON AJ’S SHOULDERS! Russian leg sweep on AJ by Williams, and he goes to the corner to climb. AJ in an opposite corner. They climb across and meet in the middle. Williams wraps his legs around the cables…Sabin pulls AJ down and Williams is hanging there…AJ with a spring board and barely gets Williams who falls down! Sabin climbs now…starts to scale across…AJ up as well…Sabin gets the SUPER RANA on AJ! This is awesome chants now. Williams tries a reverse DDT, AJ flies and gets the Asai DDT! DOUBLE DDT! SWEET! AJ climbs now, he goes across…MISSILE DROP KICK BY SABIN WHO TURNS AJ INSIDE OUT! HOLY SHIT! Williams with a Foley like clothesline to Sabin and they go to the floor. AJ tries to get up and he looks hurt. Williams climbs…AJ is up and they climb the structure. Williams rams AJ’s head off the steel and then wraps his arm up and rams it repeatedly! AJ GOT STUCK! HE WAS STUCK and looks really hurt! Sabin up, and in the ring as is Williams. CRADLE SHOCK TO WILLIAMS! Sabin climbs…he scales across…AJ in and pulls him off…tries the Styles Clash…TRIANGLE CHOKE ON AJ! He powers him up…power bomb on Sabin! One armed Styles Clash to AJ who really looks hurt. AJ climbs up…and has trouble reaching the cables. He goes across…he is close and FALLS OFF! The right arm is too hurt… Williams up…CANADIAN DESTROYER ON AJ! Williams and Sabin are up and DDT ON SABIN! Williams sets for the Destroyer…then climbs. Sabin pulls him down and a RUNNING POWER BOMB INTO THE CORNER! Sabin climbs as AJ is dazed. Williams climbs…Sabin is further across…and is upside down trying to get the belt…they both have it…they tug at it…AJ SPRINGS OFF THE ROPES ACROSS THE RING AND SNAGS THE BELT OUT OF MIDAIR! AJ WINS! NEW CHAMPION!

Winner: AJ Styles @ 19:52 ****¾

JJ and Nash argue about the belt. JJ says he had his chance.

Match #9 Monty Brown vs. Jeff Jarrett ©

Borash in for the super special ring announcing tonight.

Here we go! JJ talks smack, and we lock up. Monty takes him to the corner and they battle to the other corner and JJ with an arm drag. JJ STRUT! Lots of Monty chants. Lock up, go behind by JJ then a headlock. Off the ropes…sweet dropkick by JJ…strut as well. Now he poses in the corner and then mocks Monty. They circle, lock up and JJ with another headlock. Off the ropes…they collide and JJ tries again and nothing. PRESS SLAM on JJ and down he goes! Knee by JJ and a knee to Monty in the corner. Tries an arm drag, but Monty reverses him and Monty STRUTS! Right hands to JJ in the corner by Monty, and catches JJ off the ropes…JJ escapes, off the ropes again and Power slam by Monty for 2. Monty stops the RANA by JJ and a head butt to the gut gets 2. Monty misses a clothesline and flies to the floor. FLYING CROSS BODY BY JJ, MONTY CATCHES HIM! Back breaker to JJ! Right hands by Monty and picks JJ up…JJ escapes and Monty eats the steel post! Monty tossed into the fans now and they brawl through the crowd. Chair shot to Monty by JJ. Another and Monty is in trouble! Monty thrown back over the rail to ring side and JJ follows. JJ with a chair shot to the gut of Monty. Monty slammed on the table in front of Tenay and West. JJ grabs a big chair from Tenay and slams it on Monty! Monty now slammed onto the railing again. JJ grabs the belt and the ref stops him as Monty slides back in the ring. Sleeper on Monty now, and JJ tries to wear the big man down. Monty down to a knee and JJ has control. Arm drop 1…2…NO! Monty is alive! To his feet now and back elbows to JJ. Off the ropes…SLEEPER by Monty! Knee breaker ala Flair by JJ, and roll up by Monty for 2 as JJ went for the figure 4! JJ missed the rope choke and crotches himself. Off the ropes, duck under and both men collide mid-ring and are down. The ref counts and is at 7…8…9…but they are getting up. Right hands by JJ and Monty blocks it! Monty fights back and JJ off the ropes… Monty catches JJ…ALPHA BOMB! 1…2…NO! Off the ropes, Circle of Life (1 arm neck breaker) by Monty for 2! JJ tries the stroke, and gets shoved into the ref! Boot to Monty by JJ. Grabs the guitar…EL KABONG! Monty is still up…then down. Cover…1…2…NO! Monty is ALIVE! The ref jacked his knee up, as he cannot stand. JJ has the chair, Monty has him on his shoulders now…nails Monty…who falls back and they are down. JJ covers…1…2…NO! JJ grabs the belt! He NAILS MONTY AGAIN! Cover 1…2…NO! MONTY IS NOT TAKIN THIS SHIT! Right hands by JJ, no effect! JJ off the ropes…reversal…POOOOOOOOOOOOOUNCE TO THE REF! DAMNIT! JJ has a guitar hidden under the steps. In the ring…on the 2nd ropes…MONTY STOPS HIM! CHOKE SLAM ON JJ! Monty has the guitar! EL KABONG TO JJ! The fans want the END! The ref is out still. Monty covers and gets like 10 but a new ref is out and Monty gets 2 as we get a bullshit chant! JJ off the ropes…. Monty for the Pounce but JJ nails him with the guitar AGAIN! STROKE TO MONTY! ANOTHER! LOW BLOW! 3rd STROKE! 1…2…3.

Winner: Jeff Jarrett @ 16:22 ***½

The 411: Two bad (BALLS and ASS) matches on the show, but if you can overlook that this was the best effort for TNA to date. The Ultimate X rocked, Kash and Dustin shocked, AMW vs. Team Canada was excellent and everything else just clicked big time.
Final Score:  9.0   [  Amazing ]