USWA Championship Wrestling (9.22.1990) Review

-Originally aired September 22, 1990.

-Your host is Dave Brown.

DIRTY WHITE BOY & DOUG GILBERT (with Dirty White Girl) vs. KEN RAPER & TIM HALL
-DWB does some mat wrestling but concludes that it’s not quite dirty enough, so he drives elbows into the skull and tags in Doug Gilbert. Ken Raper tags in and falls victim to a double clothesline. Gilbert Irish whips DWB into his opponent, and that’s enough to get the win.

-The whole entourage heads over to complain about an impending dog food match with Vicious Vicki. The loser has to eat dog food, and they think the stipulation was Bill Dundee’s idea because he’s still hot headed about Tessa being chased out of the territory. They discuss rumors that Dundee and Vicki are roommates, and Bill Dundee comes out all defensive and insists that he and Vicki are just friends. We believe that, Bill.

-Dirty White Girl rears back and slaps Dundee, and Vicki heads out and a brawl erupts, with Dundee getting the upper hand with a chair and chasing the heels off.

-Jerry Lawler is here and he says he doesn’t know how much more his body can take of this feud with Eddie Gilbert. Here’s what he means…

-We head to Mid-South Coliseum, were Lawler just beats the hell out of Gilbert in a street fight, ramming him into a barricade, ramming his face into a chair, and piledriving him, and then Eddie Gilbert hits him in the face was a boot and the commentary is like “OMG, call a doctor.” So Sam Bass heads into the ring with a bottle of something and tries to spray Lawler in the eyes, but Lawler ducks and Gilbert takes a faceful of whatever it is, and he’s burned and blinded so badly by it that he has to leave in an ambulance. Interesting part, I was all set to bust on them for ripping off the Jake Roberts/Rick Martel angle that happened at around the same time, but then I checked the dates and it turns out the Roberts/Martel angle was at a TV taping the night after Eddie was blinded. So I can only assume Vince read spoilers on 411 back in 1990 and ripped off the angle.

-And then we go to action in Missouri from last night with Doug Gilbert battling Jerry Lawler. Eddie Gilbert runs in, removing his bandages and glasses and revealing he was faking the blindness. This is such a weird waste of an angle because the crowd in Missouri doesn’t know what happened at the house show in Memphis and they could have milked the “injury” for at least one TV taping and then had the shocking reveal at the next week’s house shows.

-So now the Gilberts lay out Lawler on the mat and try to break his left with chair shots. Brickhouse Brown heads out to make the save, but the heels have a noose ready and they hang him, which the camera very smartly looks away from and Lawler just has to tell us that it’s happening. So they keep working the leg over and Lawler, in the studio, points out that the referee is just standing in the corner watching the incident. Another referee heads out to try to break it up, but now the first referee attacks the second referee so the assault on Lawler can continue!

-So Lawler is vowing revenge, no matter how many photographers and referees the Gilberts turn against him. He notes that Eddie Gilbert has been barred from the building for today’s TV taping, while Eddie Marlin tries to figure out what to do about this.

THE NIGHTSTALKER vs. CHRIS FRAZIER
-Nightstalker is a masked guy and I’m POSITIVE it’s not Bryan Clark, because he’s kinda doughy and especially because he’s doing an effeminate strut for his entrance. And before the match can even get started, Eddie Gilbert storms out, having had it up to here with these stinkin’ “rules,” and beats up Nightstalker AND Frazier, then heads over to the table because he has something to say.

-He declares himself the new king of Memphis and the leader of a new era in the USWA. He demands loyalty from the new King’s Court and welcomes a new member of his entourage, evil referee Greg Wayne. Eddie shakes Greg’s hand and tells him he’s a better person than his brother Ken Wayne. File that claim under “low bars.”

NIGHTMARE DANNY DAVIS vs. KEITH ERIC
-This is Davis’ triumphant return to the area. He takes Eric down to the mat and spins on top of him. Kicks and punches by Davis, and a neckbreaker gets the win.

-Danny tells us he’s back because Jerry Lawler called him and told him some nut ran him down in a car, and Danny was shocked to hear that. I like that his motivation for returning includes casually mentioning that he doesn’t watch USWA.

-Eddie Gilbert walks out and he acts like a completely different character, being a polite soft-spoken babyface as he shakes Danny’s hand and tells him to join the Gilbert family and Sam Bass. Danny Davis mentions that he worked one of the early matches on the card last night for his actual first match, so he actually knows about the whole incident from last night and tells him no thanks.

-Bill Dundee and Brickhouse Brown are here with the noose from last night. Brown says he likes it rough. Yes, but what about pro wrestling?

BRICKHOUSE BROWN & SUPERSTAR BILL DUNDEE vs. THE SCORPIONS
-It’s two masked guys and the Black Scorpion stuff was definitely going on at this point, so I think USWA is feeling mighty cute.

-Double backdrop by Brick and Bill. Series of Brickhouse elbows as the jobber’s mask is starting to come apart. Flying forearm by Brickhouse finishes.

-Dirty White Boy and Eddie Gilbert promise to make Brickhouse Brown their “boy” after the house shows coming to your area.

-Downtown Bruno is here with Brian Lee & Don Harris, and it’s like a transitional period for him because he’s wearing his Harvey Whippleman hat now but he’s still Bruno. He’s furious about the upcoming title defenses where he’ll be handcuffed to Frank Morrell while Danny Davis serves as referee. It came about from an incident at the house show last Monday night where the champs retained by blinding Jeff Jarrett and Jeff Gaylord with some suspicious powder.

-And then we have 1% match and 99% angle as the champs storm the ring to attack the jobbers, and The Jeffs storm the ring and COVER the ring with baby powder. Just…a ridiculous none-left-in-the-three-stores-nearest-to-the-studio amount of baby powder, and the champs, Bruno, and the entire ring are just totally covered in powder. It’s a hell of a visual.

JEFF JARRETT & JEFF GAYLORD vs. TWILIGHT ZONE
-This should be good. There’s just no way in hell they can clean the ring, so the entire match will be on a mat covered in powder. So Gaylord clotheslines both opponents and every bump sends up this incredibly satisfying cloud with the added bonus of ruining the Zone’s head-to-toe outfits.

-Jarrett armdrags them around and as another added bonus, Jarrett’s long blonde puffy hair acts as a broom, so after he’s done the armdrag he gives himself a gentle tussle and sends out another cloud. Bodypress finishes. That was a fun match to watch.

7.5

The final score: review Good

The 411

They chickened out of the hit and run angle, but the Lawler/Gilbert stuff is STILL gold!