411’s WWE Byte This! Report 7.16.05: Lita And Matt Hardy

Well, hello my loyal (all six of you). I honestly have nothing really to report this week as it was bland as hell and nothing of any significance of any kind happened. Oh, one thing, I’m one DVD away from starting my DVD…. More on that later this month, or August, however the hell long it takes.

There is actually a subject I would like to address this week, but the fact of it is, by not addressing it, I’m doing more good than I am harm. Sorry.

PRE-MATCH WARM UP

Random SmackDown! Thoughts:

– Champion vs. Champion…. sure… .convince yourselves of that.

– Heel Eddie > Face Eddie….. Eddies Current Storyline

– The Secret: Dominic is really a girl!

– Wifey gonna put the Smack Down! (pun completely intended)

– “Don’t yell at me mother fucker ahhh hell no!!!”

– Hardcore Holly does not tolerate domestic abuse.

– Gotten out of hand Michael Cole… this has gotten out of the damn same planet as a good storyline.

– I like Psychosis. I like Super Crazy. I like Juvi. I’m undecided on the Mexicools. Everybody and their Mom seem to be marking for them. I know they can wrestle, but they haven’t done anything yet to cause a mark fest.

– Matt Morgan gets fired, and a guy whose finisher is “The Worm” still has a job.

– I wanna see Juvi VS Shelton…. God that would own.

– I got 50 bucks that says neither of the Mexicools will EVER be a guest on ByteThis!.

– HOLY SHIT he just broke his face!

– WOOOOOOOOOOO it’s the Captain!

– “the young kids” lol….

– Josh Matthews…. Who the fuck are you blowing to keep your job?

– They should not put Melina next to Torrie…. It makes her not as hot in comparison.
**counts his negative emails**

– This XWF DVD doesn’t look too bad.

– You guys see the two “PE” signs in the front. I think that meant to say Peep but the friends were on the wrong damn page… or drunk…. Or they just don’t know… either way, seeing PEPE all night is somewhat annoying.

– ANIMAL!!!!!!!

– Heidenriech / Animal VS MNM at GAB, “Hawk” Tribute Match… I can smell it now.

– He should have said “little baby bitches”

– That was cold……………………………I bet he cleared that with Animal before the match.

– I wonder if Heidenriech is gonna shave his head like Hawk… if he does, people will mark out like marking out is cool…. wait……and oh yeah, I told you three comments ago!

– Hardcore Holly = tied with Booker T, Big Show, and RVD as most underused in the entire company. Notice that the 3 names I mentioned 1. Didn’t work for Vince until he bought them, and 2. Have never seen either of the big straps…

– Yet again another fine match by Holly… but since the entire booking team was on a coffee break, nobody noticed… *sigh*…. I still long for the damn smiley that has the straight line representing the mouth and the blinking eyes.

– I’d do the whole “smoke, lights, blue” joke, but it’s been worn out.

– Christian! Woo! Aren’t you in that title feud with Cena? …oh wait, Jericho stole it. That’s okay, you got the title shot against Dave… oh wait, it was non title and you completely jobbed. It’s cool, you’ve got that title push coming… oh wait, Dave’s size, JBL, and the return of Brock have killed that. Fuck this shit, I’m joining the Chain Gang. **cue straight mouthed smiley**

– I complained a couple weeks back that Booker is completely underused. Last week I ranted about Christians ONE win this year…. Vince apparently hates me, as Christian got his second win…………………….. in a total squash…………………….. against Booker T. **ditto**

– That’s how you know you’re over… you act like a complete dick, steal a match, and you still see 290239393 Peep signs going up when your music cues.

– Looks like JBL got beat up at a house show.

– When Orlando Jordan gets in more offense than your favorite superstar, maybe you should start marking for someone else. Or, like me, you could be in denial and just blame it on JBL.
– Has Dave lost since WrestleMania???

RING ENTRANCE

1. Byte This! is a weekly radio program hosted by Todd Grisham and Steve Romero. They interview superstars over the phone, and allow for some fan interaction (if you consider 2 questions per guest fan interaction). Sometimes the guest is in full character, sometimes completely out of character, and sometimes a little of both. During the commercial breaks, they show various clips. During the interviews, they show various clips and pictures of the superstar on the phone.

2. I will provide a general recap with some of my thoughts and opinions, and a little (VERY little) witty banter.

3. Quotes will be found after the superstar recap, and for those of you who have to hear every single word out of your superstars’ mouth, a link will be provided to take you to the actual show.

4. I will be recapping SUPERSTAR INTERVIEWS ONLY. I will not spend time to regurgitate the bickering between the hosts, OR the weekly phone call from Droz (unless I get email requesting otherwise, or LC tells me I have to).

5. Any typos found in the quotes or the recaps are because those are the exact words from the hosts or superstar’s mouth. (Example: ya know. Example: gonna)

THE MATCH

Show kicks off with no opening sequence, it’s just Todd Grisham. And ONLY Todd Grisham… yay. He makes the announcement that Lita (and apparently ONLY Lita, thanks WWE I didn’t want to hear from Kurt Angle anyway you assholes.) will be joining him live in the studio. Oh, THERE’S the opening sequence. Before they get back, let me just say, if I hadn’t placed bets for me losing my sanity all the way in September, Todd Grisham and Lita may have done it. Sorry, poolers, close but no cigar.

We’re back and joining Todd Grisham is Lita. She comes in and flops down in her chair and hikes her feet up on the table. Todd kisses her ass for a minute and Lita thanks him for his professionalism. I suppose since I’m bored and all, I can probably do this in “Promo Format” (see here to explain, and by the way, HTML is still a bitch, so you need to love me for any bold, underlining, and linking in this column.) once he gets into the direct line of questioning. Oh, and he immediately jumps into the direct line of questioning.

TODD: Talk a little bit about your thoughts on the shocking return of Matt Hardy on RAW last week.

LITA: For months I’ve kept quiet about it, trying to take the high road (except for of course pretending Kane was Matt Hardy and shooting on him with your promos), to leave my personal life personal, but legitimately safety issues come in (???). Edge being blindsided on Monday, and me still not clear from knee surgery, and it’s like when is enough going to be enough. This seems to be Matt Hardy’s forum, where he’s most comfortable. If it’s happening in cyberspace it’s happening in Matt Hardy’s living room (the implied tone makes this a burn). So I’ve got my hands up, ask me whatever you want.

(Personal Side Note #1: 1. She did not answer the question and 2. If you go listen to this response it’s the most incoherent, unconnecting, confusing statement I’ve ever heard in my life.)

TODD: After his appearance on RAW he posted a lengthy statement on his website, and I’ll read you a few things here. Have you read this?

LITA: I’ve read through it. Probably the reason that you can’t read the whole thing is because contrary to his ‘role model’ persona that he likes to portray for children, it’s quite vulgar and I don’t know if we can even talk about the things he said on there.

(Personal Side Note #2: Okay, I need a damn cigarette and a beer for this shit… be back in a minute)

…………………………………
TODD: I’ll clean it up a little bit. Basically, he says “As of July 11th, it is my personal Independence Day. The movement has begun to make Lita, Edge, and the WWE regret what they did to me. What they did to us. It’s time for Matt Hardy to step up for all the MFers who chanted ‘We Want Matt’ and ‘You Screwed Matt’. The McMahons, the Johnny Ace’s and all of WWE Management can kiss my ass.”. He then says Edge is “feces” and “must pay for what he did.”. “I’m not going to let the WWE forget that they F’d up when they released me instead of that scumbag home wrecker”. And then Lita he says to you “Lita, you know what it’s like to have me as your closest ally, but you’re gonna hate to see what it’s like to have me as your worst enemy.” and then calls you a name. What do you think of all that.

LITA: It sounds like a threat first off. Ya know, I’m sorry the guy has never had his heart broken before, hate to be the one that did that, but ya know, grow up. He talks about potentially suing Vince for getting arrested, and he should have been arrested long before that. Sorry I broke your heart, I know emotions come into play and everything, but the stuff that he’s doing is illegal (cutting a ‘shoot’ promo whilst getting tackled by fake cops is illegal?). I fell in love with another guy. I’m not saying its right, I’m not saying the way I went about it was right, but that’s what happened, and that’s the bottom line (CUZ STONE COLD SAID SO!!!).

**She then goes on a rant about wrestling taking over Matt’s life and that causing the relationship to deterierate (funny I thought it was you playing Hide the Sausage with Edge?). I’m not repeating it because it’s the same thing said in 3 different ways. Moving on.**

LITA: Enjoy me from 9 to 11, and then don’t worry about who I’m in bed with. I have no obligation to the fans to be Matt Hardy’s girlfriend. And based on what we’ve seen lately, can’t you see why I wouldn’t want to be with him? The way he’s acted has only shown me more clearly that I made the right decision to be with Edge. Quite immature to say the least.

TODD: Here’s an Email from Annie: ‘Lita, how do you respond to all the bad press you and Edge have gotten? Do you feel bad about it?’ (It really sucks they screen their calls. You know, it wouldn’t take a rocket scientist to say the question is something like “Are you going for the Women’s Title when you get back” and then when you get on say “What’s it like to be a slut banging a horse?”)

LITA: I do feel bad because I don’t go autograph things for fans. I don’t go out to eat or be in the public eye because I don’t want to hear it. I know there are fans that will be fans of mine no matter what, but I’m not going to go get yelled at by all the ‘MFers’ just to sign an autograph. (I think what she was trying to say is that she feels bad for her fans that don’t get to see her anymore because she isn’t attending any PR events). As for the bad press, the one thing I’ve done up until today was not turn on a computer, not listen to any of it, I’ve just completely ignored it. A lot of stuff out there is not true. Matt always starts his statements with something like “I’m far from perfect” and then talks about how perfect he is. One thing Matt IS perfect at is being a spin doctor. It’s like he’s done nothing wrong and the relationship was perfect and then out of nowhere boom enter Edge.

TODD: We have another email here: Are you surprised that your personal life has had such an impact on the viewers and the fans.

LITA: I never thought in a million years that if you had told me I’d be sitting here today or be in any scenario like this, and it all adds to just…. it… makes me shut down. I’m used to being a really strong person, and being in control, and now I’ve affected this outside force that I have no control over and it makes me shut down. It makes me want to go away.

TODD: Candy from Wisconsin wants to know: How is your relationship with Matt’s brother? Are you still friends with Jeff?

LITA: I spoke to Jeff maybe twice since it’s started, and I understand why. He is gonna have his brothers back and I understand that and I support that. The problem is that now it’s like ‘It’s on’. Before I was like okay, these people are Matt fans, these people are Lita fans, nobody had to choose sides, but now they’ve forced me to be here, so …let’s go.

TODD: Another question here: Do you see yourself ever possibly becoming friends with Matt or even getting back together?

LITA: No way. I couldn’t see us being friends. I couldn’t see us getting back together, but then again, I couldn’t see myself sitting here in this situation either.

TODD: How do you feel about Edge’s relationships? Obviously, before this he was married (TWICE!).

LITA: No, I don’t really have a comment on that, I think we can leave that to him to talk about because I feel that that’s a personal situation..

TODD: Do you still care about Matt Hardy? Do you think about him on a daily basis or are you more trying to push him out of your mind. Obviously, having had such a long relationship with him, there’s still some feelings there I would think.

LITA: I do think about him and I do care about him, but then… when I avoided it, it was easier to have compassion for the situation. But now seeing all the things he’s said about me and the situation, it’s hard to have any compassion left.

TODD: As promised, we are taking calls. Caller, please state your name and ask your question.

JAZELLE: (before this girl even speaks I’m going to bet Cook 10 bucks right now she is a fan and completely supportive of Lita…nice work sign screeners) Hi, who are you (to Todd Grisham laughing my ass off)? Lita I just wanted to say that I’m one of your biggest fans (cough it up Steve, wanna go double or nothing?), and I support you 100% (should’ve cut your losses). I understand that things do happen beyond our control. You’re here to entertain us. What you do behind closed doors is your business, and I’ll continue to support you and I hope everything works out (let’s see? Her boink-buddy is apparently in the title hunt now, she has a guaranteed title feud with Trish when she gets back, and Matt Hardy got fired…. I think it worked out.)

LITA: Thank you. I don’t want to completely turn my back on those people that are out there, and that’s cool, I’m glad that I got that call, but I can’t base my life on ‘Oh I hope I get a phone call from somebody that supports me’. I do what I do, whether you draw inspiration from it, or you don’t like it, that’s me.

TODD: Edge has his supporters as well. When you’re out with Edge, what kind of reaction is he getting? Is it as negative as you?

LITA: The whole internet thing, I compare to road rage, when people are a lot ballsier in their car, or a lot ballsier when they’re behind their keyboard, so the only people that are actually going to come up to us are people that support us (why is Lita gonna kick my ass now?). These people that ya know, talk under their breath from 20 yards away who are like “youscrewedmatt” and the whole thing on the Internet where they were standing up for theMFers, and all that, it’s not true, because nobody has the balls to do anything.

TODD: During some of Edge matches we’ve heard “You Screwed Matt” chants and certain things about you. Do you guys feed off that? Or is it a distraction?

LITA: I will actually lose my train of thought of what I’m doing out there, because I’m like ‘I cannot believe… this is ridiculous’. It’s ridiculous that because of a decision I made, 20,000 people are chanting something that they know nothing about (way to be supportive of the fans there Lita).

TODD: Do you have any regrets? I don’t think you intentionally wanted to hurt Matt. Going back, might you have done things a little differently? Handled the situation differently?

LITA: Absolutely. Life is a learning experience. All you can do is learn from your mistakes, but you can’t go back in time. Matt suggested I owed an apology to the internet and that along with a million other things he said are just completely ridiculous. I have apologized to Matt. I didn’t mean to hurt him. Yes, I wish I went about things differently, I wish I would have ended things before I went there with Edge and I didn’t. All I can do is apologize and hopefully we’ll both learn from this and keep growing. Apparently, he’s not growing much. I really regret it, but it definitely brings out the best or worst in people, and I’ve been really shocked how he’s acted in all of this (I’d be pissed too if I could have been doing the horizontal mambo with somebody like Stacy Keibler for the last year instead of her!).

TODD: We’ve got another caller. Caller, please state your name and ask your question.

MANDI: This is Mandi. I would like to know how the whole situation and the things Matt Hardy has done has affected your life.

LITA: He told me the day after I was driving down to Atlanta to my Mother’s house that ‘This is career suicide, you’re gonna pay for what you did, and all of this’, and everything he’s done to a point I understand, he’s hurt, he’s gonna act out, but I’ve tried to take the high road. As much as it hurts, I’ve tried to just move on. But it hurts, and I think about it all the time.

TODD: Where do you see your relationship going with Edge? How close are you guys at this point?

LITA: I definitely love him. This has taken a turn with all of the stress. A normal relationship is hard enough as it is, getting to know someone. Having this magnifying glass on top of it, having fans think …even supportive fans that say “Screw Matt, go with Edge” and I’m thinking ‘I can’t believe somebody just said that to me’. I can’t explain exactly how it happened, or why I’m in love, but I am, and I’m happy with the feelings that I have for Edge. I just wish we’d have both gone about it better.

TODD: We have another caller on the line (name and question).

MATT: Hey Amy, this is Matt Hardy (WOOOO SHWORKS! …although “woots” would be just as funny). The question I’d like to ask you (it’s so funny the way he is emphasizing a tone as if he were just another fan calling the show) is..

TODD: Wait, is this really Matt Hardy… (to the ByteThis crew) do we have confirmation? (Shut up tool and let the man speak!)

MATT: This is Matt Hardy.

TODD: It is?

LITA: It sounds like Matt Hardy to me, and it really shouldn’t surprise me at this point.

MATT: Yeah, this actually is Matt Hardy, and if you need conformation how about the same place I showed up at Monday and embarrassed you, it’s also the same place you told me you loved me the first time, Amy. Remember that?

LITA: Yes I do.

MATT: Okay, need more confirmation?

LITA: No Matt go ahead (Lita is also doing an awesome job of shifting her mood to disgusted bitch).

MATT: No go ahead, I’m going to give you a chance, considering I’ve talked to you here and there, but not since this whole thing REALLY started. But I’d like to hear you explain yourself, go ahead. I wanna hear it from you. I wanna hear it from the horses mouth (that’d be Edge, then, Matt… wait, didn’t I already make that joke earlier? Christ I’m lame.)

LITA: What would you like to know, Matt. As I’m sure you’ve been listening to this entire show, because if it’s online, it’s on in your house, I know that (leave the IWC alone woman!).

MATT: Okay, here’s the first thing. How’d it feel to see me Monday?

LITA: It wasn’t so much seeing you that I didn’t like. It was you blindsiding my boyfriend (I LOVE that she used the term ‘boyfriend’ instead of Edge) and attacking him, but that was awfully sweet of you.

MATT: If you thought that was sweet, believe me, your life is only starting to become miserable. Adam Copeland (I love shworks! **hugs his schwork**), your boyfriend, the love of your life (sarcastically), his life is only starting to become miserable. Because Monday was the very first day in my movement. And my movement will be to get retribution on you, on that piece of feces (woo! I know we’ve read it 1,000 times but it’s so much better to hear it), Adam Copeland, and the WWE, more specifically WWE Office, Johnny Ace, and all the other Ass-holes that fired me.

LITA: That’s great. Are you done with your wrestling promo you just cut (buurrrrrrn)?

MATT: Actually no. I’ve got plenty of wrestling promos left to do, and plenty to discuss with you (Lita actually gave a little smile that read ‘You were a funny guy when we were together’). Go ahead and tell me. Why are you more in love with Adam Copeland than you were with me? Why’d you throw away six good years? Why’d you flush that down the drain? Especially considering he’s been married twice, and run over every woman he’s been with. What makes you think you’re so special? What makes you different?

LITA: I don’t know if I need to talk to you about my relationshi….

MATT: I think you owe it to me, considering I’ve given you six good years of my life, and I probably loved you more than anybody else will love you.

LITA: What I mean is I don’t think I owe you an explanation of my relationship with Edge, although I can tell you why I don’t want to be with you. Cutting wrestling promos in a personal context could be one excuse (thing, Lita, not excuse… it could be one thing).

MATT: Well, you are the reason that I’m cutting wrestling promos. And you are the reason that I showed up Monday night. And you are the reason all this began.

LITA: I just don’t understand why you chose to act out in such a big way about a breakup, that happens everyday, not in the public’s eye, but you chose to act out this way, you chose to get your MFers to rally behind you, your MFers behind you must make it easier, must make you more right, more vindicated because I’ve fallen in love with somebody else.

MATT: Well, the reason that it’s public, is because we’re public people. We’re public wrestling celebrities. We were not just a couple, Amy, we were a working couple. We’ve worked together in the WWE for many years, and you had to know, doing this with another wrestler, a guy who claimed to be one of my best friends…You know, they say you only have so many true friends in this business, so few in fact you could count them on your hand, and I would have considered Adam one. And the fact that you would go out and fall in love and have an affair with him behind my back, lying the whole way, I definitely think that makes things a public issue, especially ….of course it’s gonna come out. We’re on TV. We’re worldwide. We’re in every country in the world. Considering the power of the internet, that was gonna be out, and I was gonna defend myself.

LITA: The reason it was out is because you put it out there. That’s why it’s out there and how it became public knowledge. I think if people were mature adults in this situation, it wouldn’t have gotten to where it got, and obviously you were the driving force behind that one, “saving face” by rallying these troops behind you. I don’t compute it. Us dealing with it one on one would have been very more effective. Perhaps issued could have been worked out. Obviously, you know we were together for a long time, I’d never been with anybody else, this thing just happened with Edge, I didn’t mean for it to happen. Yes, I went about it wrong, and the two of us needed to sit down and talk, and not have me ranted on on the internet.

MATT: You…

TODD: Matt, can I interrupt you really quick with a question here?

MATT: Make it quick.

TODD: A lot of people are wondering, do you feel that Edge should have been fired over you?

MATT: Yes. Absolutely. Lemme go back because I’m gonna get to that in just a minute. (to Amy) It’s funny that you feel so justified on this feeling. What should have happened, is anytime this creep put a move on you, you should have came home and told me, but you didn’t do that (damn skippy). So every time after that, it was intentional (THAT is a true statement, folks). And it did not start with me. Word would have gotten out as soon as you started hanging out with Edge and all that. And I certainly wasn’t going to let people think I was treating you bad in this relationship, because I never did. I treated you good as gold, and there’s no denying that. And as far as the whole ‘Matt getting fired’ and not Edge? You’ve got a guy, Johnny Ace is what everybody calls him, he’s the head of talent relations right now, I was ready to make a comeback. I had rehabbed. I was supposed to be out 9 months. I was ready to come back at 6 months because I BUSTED MY ASS to come back and wrestle for a wrestling company I love with everything that I am, that I’ve sacrificed everything for over the last 7 years. You guys know that. TLC Matches, Ladder Matches, whatever it may be, and I was ready to come back. I was in Greenville, NC working out, and I got a phone call from Johnny Ace. And he says “Well, Matt, I have to tell you, we’re gonna have to release you, we just don’t have anything creatively for you” and I said “Johnny, I don’t buy into that. You’re telling me I’m being released because creative doesn’t have anything for me? This has nothing to do with my situation??”, and 1. Johnny Ace has a personal vendetta against me, and 2. Considering I was the victim in this whole thing, I mean… Adam Copeland was a guy who was married, committing adultery, having an affair with my girlfriend. Those two were in the wrong, and the WWE is gonna endorse that? And fire me? While I was at home with an injury? That is absolute bullshit! How can that be justified… Adam Copeland, the Edge, THAT’s the guy that should have been fired. They should have sent him home, and maybe should have sent you home, too, Amy. I came out Monday and called him Adam because that’s the only name I know him by, but I didn’t even call you Amy, because the Amy Dumas I know is dead. She is gone. Lita is all I know. This filthy whore hanging out with Edge, that’s all I know. I don’t even know who Amy Dumas is anymore.

AMY: Okay, and… why should I want to be with you? After a rant like this?

MATT: I’ll tell you, I don’t want to be with you either. I’m the type of person, I’m vindictive, I’ll tell you that right now. And you screw over Matt Hardy, I will make your life miserable. You did that to me. I looked at you on the same level as myself. Wrestling is all I’ve known and all I’ve loved my whole life, and it got to a point where I loved you more than wrestling. I put you first and I put my career second. And for people who don’t know this, I was on SmackDown!, and I was having the most fun and the best time of my entire career, and the whole reason I came to RAW was to be with this girl, Amy Dumas. To be on TV with Lita, so it wouldn’t mess up our schedule, so it wouldn’t mess up our relationship. Moving to RAW did nothing for me. It was a career killer, and part of it was your fault, because you got heat when I got there. I came over there just for you, because our relationship was number one to me. Wrestling was second. But when it was ME out with injury (referring to how supportive he was when she had neck surgery), it seems like our relationship meant nothing. Wrestling was first to you, and then even your relationship with Edge became first to you. So now because of this, I will get retribution on you, I will get retribution on Adam, and I will get retribution on the company, because I am the type of person who….people don’t just run over me, and I lay down and die. If people run over me, I will get up and massacre them. I will dismantle them. You saw what it was like to have me as your closest ally and do anything for you, now you’ll see what it’s like being my worst enemy.

LITA: I know, I know Matt. I read it.

MATT: Good, it was just to reiterate. I wanna warn you before I come.

LITA: Okay, great. We’re now here at ByteThis! I’m your host, Lita. We have Matt Hardy as a guest. Despite all he’s said over the last few months, he actually has more to say. I know you’re all on the edge of your seat. What else you got to say, Matt.

MATT: Would you like to hear some more? This is all I’m gonna say right now. I am a free man. My no compete clause has ended. You never know where I’m gonna show up. This Friday, I’ll plug it for you, this Friday I’ll be out in Hershey, Pennsylvania. Come out and see Matt Hardy. Saturday I’ll be wrestling in Ring of Honor. Come out and see a REAL wrestling promotion, as opposed to the WWE and it’s soap opera storylines. And this Sunday, you never know where I’ll show up. I might go down to Florida for a vacation (kind of surprised Vince let him get that one in… but I suppose in the long run it doesn’t mean shit). And Monday, you never know where I’ll show up there. Tuesday, there’s a big show th……

LITA: Alright that’s all the time we have today on Byte This! Thanks, Matt Hardy, we appreciate you so much for stopping by today. Thank you we’ll be talking to you later, le…

MATT: Hey Amy. On a serious note. Why? Why did you do it? Why would you do it?

LITA: There was obviously something missing there for me to go fall in love with someone else, Matt.

MATT: What was missing? (At this point Lita is just staring at the camera, I’m assuming having no idea what to say.) What was missing?

LITA: I don’t think I need to share that with the rest of the world, Matt. Even though that’s how you’re dealing with things, there are still places I don’t want to go, and I don’t think I should have to.

MATT: Go ahead, don’t be afraid now.

You can see Lita unhooking her microphone, getting up, and walking out.

TODD: Matt, Lita has left. Unfortunately I guess that concludes are interview, thanks for calling in and clearing the air a little bit. All the fans want to know, what’s next for Matt Hardy.

MATT: Who knows. I know that every Monday and Tuesday there’s a WWE event going on somewhere, so you’ll never know where I’ll pop up. Hey Todd, make sure you check out thematthardyshow.com. It’s coming up and it will be the first ever online reality TV show. It’s off the chain. Right now there’s actually a little statement I put up
….
TODD: I’m being told we have to cut you off Matt, thanks for calling in.

MATT: THEMATTHARDY.COM, I’LL SEE YOU AT RING OF HONOR.

**click**

Todd doesn’t pimp a damn thing, and the show ends at just under 30 minutes. WHAT THE FUCK? It’s supposed to be an hour, so they bump Angle for Lita, then only make it a half hour??? You couldn’t have talked to Kurt Angle the second half hour? Jesus….

THE FINISHER

I’m not going to shit all over this, but I’m not going to mark out either. I don’t like Todd Grisham, and I’m not the biggest fan of Lita. The Matt stuff was nice, but at the end of the day, we all know that it’s a work (shwork*). Now, admittedly, Vince hasn’t cut somebody loose like this in a while, but the fact is they all still work for WWE. So, in an attempt to be a professional, I’ll take an unbiased look at tonight. Did it continue storyline progression? Yes. Did it add to character development? Yes. Therefore, despite it being half as long as it should have and completely giving the finger to Kurt Angle, I’d have to call this episode successful.

That’s it for me, kids. Take care, and always mark for Christian.

PROMOS

Cook Played a game of “Drag-Ass” this week, and promptly blamed it on his wallet being 15 dollars lighter.

Larry has now become a permanent fixture in the Promos section, just like Cook.

Randle continues to pimp me weekly, and therefore the “returning of the favor” also continues.

Ashish continues to blatantly ignore every shot at take at him for not inviting me to Fact or Fiction…. My guess? He doesn’t even know this column exists.

411 Staff chimed in with the latest RoundTable

This week I’m going to pimp Ziegler because I honestly don’t get over into the Video Reviews very much, but those boys are working very hard to bring you the goodness.

I’m also going to pimpObal because I don’t plug the TV Reports….. because they bump my column off the front page, and you have to actually click on the TV Reports list to find me…. yeah, THAT’S gonna happen.

Entire interview can be seen / heard here