The Fink’s Payload 06.05.08: WWE Draft 2008

Hello again, loyal Payloaders, and welcome to a slightly-shorter-than-usual edition of the Fink’s Payload. I’ve really been on the run these days and haven’t had much time to frollick in the world of wrestling, so to speak, so let’s get a few things straight before we start…

The Undertaker got fired?
Randy Orton and Big Show both suffered serious injuries?
Triple H and John Cena are fighting for the WWE Championship at the next pay-per-view?

I gots to hand it to ya, WWE… when you shake it up, you shake it up. Well, except the last thing. I predicted that match in last week’s article. And what’s that? You say you have a draft coming up in a few weeks? Wow, you sound like you’re going to give us an amazingly fresh, new product!

Hey, we can dream, right?

With the lottery right around the corner, I was wondering what everybody thought might happen. I was really interested when I saw the results. Before we get to them, I wanted to let y’all in on what kinds of questions I had on my mind:

How will the draft picks be decided?

There are a couple ways that the WWE has done this in the past:

In 2002, the WWE split into two brands with two general managers and each GM alternated choosing superstars out of a unified talent pool to build their rosters.

Two years later, the rosters were already split and each show received six “random” superstars from the other show.

The following summer, another lottery was held and this time both show’s champions were “randomly” selected (along with eight others) to switch brands. Confused yet?

In 2006, another brand was created and its roster featured mostly lower-carders and new guys along with two “draft picks” – one chosen superstar from each of the pre-existing brands.

Finally, the year after that, the WWE decided to switch things up and hold exhibition matches between superstars from all three different brands. When a superstar won the match, he essentially won a “random” new superstar for his brand.

I always wondered, wasn’t that counter-productive? Why would CM Punk want to win his match if it meant that somebody really good, like, Big Show or Triple H or Undertaker, would be forced to come to ECW? Couldn’t that hurt your chances at your brand’s championship? Oh, WWE, how you make my brain hurt.

So, to sum up…

The Many Ways to Pick a Lottery (not counting ECW in ‘06)
GM Non-Random Selections from Unified Talent Pool (‘02)
GM Random Selections from Opposite Brand (‘04, ‘05)
Superstars Earn Random Draft Picks (’07)

How many picks will there be?

Without delving into the huge draft of 2002, there has been a variation on how many superstars in total are drafted away from their homes. A breakdown of the subsequent drafts:

2004: 12 (with 2 post-draft trades involving 7 superstars)
2005: 10 (with 2 post-draft trades involving 12 superstars)
2007: 10 (with a supplemental draft involving 13 superstars)

Will all the brands be involved and how will they be represented?

In years past, the two brands were treated as equals and ECW was given a “fair” shot with the big boys last year. But the overall draft dispersion has never really been equal. The IWC calls this the “raping of Smackdown,” but I’m sure there might be a better way to put it. These days the SD-ECW talent exchange puts a cloud over the certainty. Will they “pick” superstars separately or together? I don’t really see how it matters – besides, two of the past three ECW Champions have been technically Smackdown competitors.

Having pointed out those three things, let’s go ahead and take a look at your submissions!

Opinion #1: Brett from Sydney
“Buried Alive and Making Room for Five”

At One Night Stand
– Taker/Edge ends in a screwy finish that either leaves the title vacant or gives Taker 1 more chance at NOC
– Jeff beats Umaga that includes a run in by Matt
– Jericho interferes allowing Batista to get the win over HBK
– HHH retains
– Big Show gets the title shot

On TV prior to the draft
– Hardy vs Jericho for the IC title, HBK runs in screw Jericho out of the title
– Some matches already booked prior to the draft for NOC PPV 6 days after the draft

Draft Rules
– Champions cannot be drafted to other brands
– If the challenger in a match at NOC is drafted but then wins the title at NOC then the former champion is drafted in his place (ie if Orton gets drafted to Smackdown but then beats HHH at the PPV, Hunter goes to Smackdown)

Draft Results
Umaga (from RAW to Smackdown)
Batista (from Smackdown to RAW)
Big Show (from Smackdown to ECW)
MVP (from Smackdown to RAW)
Chris Jericho (from RAW to Smackdown)
Carlito (from RAW to Smackdown)
CM Punk (from ECW to RAW)
John Morrison (from ECW to Smackdown)
The Miz (from ECW to Smackdown)
Natalya (from Smackdown to RAW)
Ashley (from RAW to Smackdown)
Loser of the WHC match at NOC (from Smackdown to RAW)
Val Venis, The Highlanders, Super Crazy and all the other Heat regulars (from RAW to ECW)

Night of Champions (only matches affected by the draft)
WWE Title: Triple H (C) vs Randy Orton vs Chris Jericho vs Shawn Michaels vs Batista
– Match originally a fatal 4 way but Batista gets added after the draft
– HHH retains
– Jericho moves to SD after the match which also ends the feud he has going with HBK and Batista

World Heavyweight Title – Buried Alive: Edge vs The Undertaker
– Taker loses and moves to RAW
– Edge moves onto a feud with Jericho

Tag Match – US & IC title’s on the line: The Hardys vs MVP & Umaga
– MVP wants revenge for Jeff beating him at Judgment Day
– Umaga attacks Matt on SD as payback for him interfering in the falls count anywhere match

WHAT DO I THINK?: To be honest, I like the idea of ending Edge/Taker in a Buried Alive match rather than a TLC match. Your prediction notwithstanding, I just thought it would depend on who comes out on top of the feud, and One Night Stand taught us that the winner would be Edge. So it makes sense that they finished with his specialty instead of the Phenom’s. Oh, well. You accomplish essentially the same goal – putting Edge over and getting ‘Taker into (hopefully) a fresher environment. You seem to be setting up some of the feuds that we have been hearing about recently – Jericho/Edge, Show/Kane, maybe HHH/Batista – and make the predictable “hot midcarders to Raw to become top-level guys” switches with MVP and Punk. Overall, nothing wrong with this one except it doesn’t leave us with many good guys on Friday nights… is Jericho going to carry the show? I would be totally cool with that… but I don’t think it is going to happen.

Opinion #2: Jeremy from Palmdale
“I Would Ask ‘Isn’t it Ironic?’ If I Gave a Damn What You Thought”

The Show will go under the same format as last year. Except this year Vince will be announcing the picks after they come up on the “Random” Generator.

First Match of the Night: Finlay vs. Shelton Benjamin
Finlay wins thanks to the shillelagh and leprechaun.
Show: Smackdown, Draft Pick: WWE Champion Triple H (or whoever the champ is)

Randy Orton complains/politics to Vince that he should be named the new Raw Champion because Hunter went to SD.

Second Match: Matt Hardy vs. Jeff Hardy
Matt Hardy wins.
Show: Smackdown, Draft Pick: Jeff Hardy

King and Ross complain how two matches in, Smackdown has picked up the WWE Champion and one of the most popular superstars on Raw.

Third Match on the Show: Snitksy vs. Colin Delaney
Snitsky wins, after the match, Armando comes down and pins Delaney himself (continuing his ‘feud” with Delaney).
Show: RAW, Draft Pick: Armando Estrada

Vince announces Armando Estrada as the new Raw GM, after a commercial, Orton begins to politic to Estrada.

Next Match – All Three Brands will be represented: Paul London vs. Jimmy Wang Yang vs. Mike Knox
Mike Knox wins the match.
Show: ECW, Draft Pick: Santino Marella

Next Match – Chavo Guerrero vs. Mr. Kennedy
Winner: Kennedy .
Show: Raw, Draft Pick: Mark Henry

Next Match – Batista vs. Umaga
Batista.
Show: Smackdown Draft Pick: Carlito

Next Match – Maria vs. Victoria vs. Kelly Kelly
Victoria.
Show: Smackdown Draft Pick: Elijah Burke

Next Match – CM Punk vs. MVP
CM Punk.
Show: ECW Draft Pick; Rey Mysterio

Right before the battle royal, Estrada tells Orton that if he can guarantee Raw the final two picks, he will become Raw Champion.

Final Match for two draft picks -15 Man Battle Royal
Randy Orton.
Show: Raw. First Pick: CM Punk. Second Pick: Edge.

Breakdown of Overall Draft
RAW: Edge, Armando Estrada, CM Punk, and Mark Henry
ECW: Rey Mysterio and Santino Marella
Smackdown: Triple H, Jeff Hardy, Elijah Burke and Chris Jericho

Supplemental Draft
Raw; Deuce and Domino with Maryse, Matt Striker, Chavo Guerrero
ECW; Super Crazy, The Highlanders, Chuck Palumbo and Eve
Smackdown; Cryme Time, Lance Cade, Jillian Hall, Val Venis

Reasoning:
Triple H: Rather than moving one or two new challengers for each champion to face, move the Champions, give them several people to squash, Triple H could feud with Batista, MVP and Khali and eventually at the Royal Rumble next year, Vladimir Kozlov.

Jeff Hardy: A Hardys match vs. Miz and Morrison on the June 27th Smackdown, and, a RAW farewell match for Jeff Hardy on June 30th RAW, Hardys vs. London and Kendrick. Also if they keep ECW and Smackdown together, the possibility of an eventual Jeff Hardy vs. Rey Mysterio match. Also a feud with Vickie. Vickie could come out after the Hardys match with M&M and say that this will be the final time that the Hardys will be seen on Smackdown because she has traded Matt to Raw for Chris Jericho.

Armando Estrada: RAW needs a GM more than ECW does.

Santino Marella: The possibility of an FBI reformation with Nunzio, Santino, and Palumbo

Mark Henry: After the incident with Hayes, Mark needs a change of scenery.

Carlito: Would give him new opponents, possibly a feud with Batista.

Elijah Burke: Returning him to Smackdown would give him a new start.

Rey Mysterio: Could serve the role that Benoit would have served.

CM Punk: So far, Raw has lost 2 extremely popular people and gained two picks which would serve the purpose of making up for company problems (Regal’s suspension and Michael Hayes’ racism). CM Punk on Raw would be big.

Edge: Raw would need a world title.

D and D and Cryme Time moving would change up the Tag Divison
Eve could be in Extreme Expose
Lance Cade needs a new start
Val Venis would serve the purpose of someone for Kozlov to squash

WHAT DO I THINK?: A couple ironic things, right off the bat – Matt vs. Jeff, which Jeff loses, then he is “randomly” drafted to join his brother on Smackdown? Touching! Randy wins a battle royal for two picks, just like last year, and is supposed to be the new champion before his former Rated RKO-mate comes in with a title belt of his own? Controversial! I also dig how you put Rey into ECW because his fast-paced style would fit well with some of the smaller guys down there – Shelton vs. Mysterio could be super sweet. Reinvigorating the tag divisions are a good idea but, really, those guys could have switched brands without a draft and nobody would have noticed. I like how you spelled out the pick-creation-process but a complete rehash of last year, right down to the Orton two-pick victory, left me with a bad taste. First this guy is Mr. Survivor Series Match Survivor, now he’s Mr. Draft Lottery Battle Royal Winner, on top of being Mr. Beats All the Legends Man? For a dude who’s never in anything more than his undies, he’s sure got a lot of gimmicks to wear.

“Taking Advantage of Human Nature”

So last year I was thinking, instead of winning picks for your brand, what about winning a pick for yourself? What if the winner of the match got to choose which brand he wants to move to? It would really put a new wrinkle into the whole system if the guys were fighting for something personal to them, not just a contradictory “team” draft pick (see above). Let’s see where this takes us.

Vince comes out at the beginning of the show and announces the basic format is almost exactly like 2007: interbrand matches, winner picks his destiny. For sake of argument let’s treat the shows as three instead of two. Here we go.

Montel Vontavious Porter (SD) def. ECW Champion Kane (ECW)
Result: M.V.P. surprises himself with an easy victory over Kane and sends himself to Tuesday night to take the belt from the Big Red Machine.

WWE Tag Team Champions The Miz and John Morrison (ECW) def. Cryme Tyme (RAW)
Result: Right after Morrison pins JTG, Miz grabs the microphone and announces that he has always wanted to be on RAW and so that is where he is headed. Morrison cuts him off and says that there is no rule saying the winners have to go to the same show, so he is headed to Smackdown. They continue to hold the belts until they lose them.

Intercontinental Champion Chris Jericho (RAW) def. United States Champion Matt Hardy (SD)
Result: Y2J continues his half-heel run by taking the IC title to Smackdown, only to lose it to Jeff Hardy at NOC as a result of Matt’s interference. He feuds with Matt but never takes the belt from him and then moves into the World title scene in the fall.

Mark Henry (SD) def. Umaga (RAW) and Colin Delaney (ECW)
Result: Henry puts himself on Raw to play a bigger, meaner monster to turn Umaga face and then eventually fades away from our TVs forever.

Then, Teddy Long announces a six-man extreme rules match. If an ECW superstar wins the match, he will get the choice of an ECW title shot or a chance to join RAW/SD. If a RAW/SD superstar wins, they will automatically move to ECW due to their propensity for violence.

John Bradshaw Layfield (RAW) def. Santino Marella (RAW), Tommy Dreamer (ECW), Elijah Burke (ECW), Finlay (SD) and Hornswoggle (SD)
Result: JBL moves to ECW to feud with Teddy Long over the show’s GM duties as well as become a mentor and manager to the bling-blingin’ Gold Standard, Shelton Benjamin. C’mon, wouldn’t that be hilarious?

CM Punk (ECW) def. Jeff Hardy (RAW)
Result: Punk declares that he is headed for Friday nights and that he has his sights set on gold in the near future.

The final match of the night is to be a tag-team affair between the participants in the two world title matches at Night of Champions. Vince announces that this match will be decided differently because the man who gets pinned in this match will be forced to move to the brand of the man who pins him. As a result, the loser of this match will lose his title shot at NOC. Effectively, this ensures that one of the top four main-eventers will be forced to relocate but he won’t be forced to fall as far as ECW. It also propels a future program between those two men because one guy “robbed” the other guy of his guaranteed title shot just six days beforehand. Oooh, the drama is building already.

WWE Champion Triple H and John Cena def. Batista and World Champion Edge
Result: As the only pure heel in the bunch, it only makes sense for Edge to screw Batista, thus costing the Animal the match and the title shot that he won on last week’s Smackdown. While the referee is down, Edge will spear Batista and leave him open for either an F-U or a Pedigree. Batista moves to RAW where he further devolves into a brutal, angry, bitter man and eventually challenges HHH or Cena for the belt – both programs would be amazing, so either way works. Edge celebrates not having to defend his title on the Smackdown before NOC, but CM Punk shocks the world by cashing in the briefcase and forcing an impromptu match on Sunday night. Six days after drafting himself to Smackdown, CM Punk takes the World Championship and feuds with Edge over it for the remainder of the summer.

Overall Draft Breakdown
To Raw: The Miz, Mark Henry, Batista
To Smackdown: John Morrison, Chris Jericho, CM Punk
To ECW: M.V.P., J.B.L.

What do y’all think? Put your comments down below or send them to [email protected]!

Next week, we are going to look at a more general form of fantasy booking – the art of building a stable. I keep hearing about how huge Edge’s Rated R stable has become and how the second-generation superstars are going to form their own group later. In the past I have seen many groups of superstars come together and sometimes everyone in the group is made just a little bit better by their inclusion in it, so I want to know if y’all can create something memorable and useful as well.

Homework, due Tuesday, June 10 @ 11 PM
Create a stable of at least three superstars who are currently under contract with the WWE. They can be from whichever brand you like – either justify their inclusion in the stable through the upcoming draft or make their brand-shifting part of the stable’s “shocking” origin story, or some other unique deal, whichever you like. Identify the name of the group and who is in it, then tell me a little bit about why they are united and what goals they set out to accomplish together. If you plan to use the stable to elevate one particular superstar (a la The Rock in the Nation, or Triple H in D-X, or Orton and Batista in Evolution) let me know who is your breakout talent. Basically, give me however much information about their beginnings as you feel is necessary and then give me your long-term goals. Have fun!

Remember to send your ideas and thoughts to [email protected]!