411’s Hulk Hogan’s Celebrity Championship Wrestling Recap 12.06.08

Hi, hello and welcome to 411’s recap of Hulk Hogan’s Celebrity Championship Wrestling! I’m Steve Cook, and we have reached the final episode of Season One! We’re down to four competitors, and one of them will be crowned CCW Champion. The suspense is killing me, so let’s cut right to the chase.

Hulk Hogan’s Celebrity Championship Wrestling Episode 108: Finale

The fight for the belt reaches an all time high as the final four step into the ring for the last time. The most intense match yet will separate the man from the boys as the first ever CCW Champion is crowned.

Cast:

Team Hogan: Danny Bonaduce, Todd Bridges, Butterbean, Trishelle Cannatella, Dustin Diamond, Dennis Rodman
Team Beefcake: Tiffany
Team Nasty: Erin Murphy, Frank Stallone, Nikki Ziering
Coaches: Brutus Beefcake & Brian Knobs
Judges: Eric Bischoff, Jimmy Hart & Hulk Hogan

We have a nice little season recap video to start the show.

At the lounge, the final four chat. Dennis & Butterbean want to beat the crap out of each other, as usual. The coaches come in and Knobs says that the judges got it right as they picked the best four people in the competition. All the celebrities feel confident about their chances of victory. Knobs points out that Dustin’s kicks and chops suck. They go to the arena, where the judges await. Hulk congratulates them but tells them there will only be one winner. Jimmy asks Dustin who he thinks will win, and he says that any of them are capable of winning. Butterbean says the belt needs to be wider. Todd says he will get nasty, and Dennis says he will walk out a champion. Eric tells them that they will have to learn two matches, one will be a tag team match, which will determine the final two. So they also need to learn the final match. Hulk tells them to get to work.

It’s time to train, and time for Dustin to work on his chops. CHOP CITY~! Dustin gets to chop Knobs & the celebrities and ends up bruising his hand! This confuses Butterbean. They all get to chop Dustin in retaliation. Dustin cusses a lot and shows off his red chest. Dustin says that chops suck. Knobs lays out the tag team match for them, and it’s pretty funny to watch Knobs explaining all this stuff. It’s also a pretty interesting look into what a road agent/producer does, which will surely piss off Vinnie Mac. It’s twice as long as their other matches and the celebrities get confused. After a commercial break they seem more confident. Funny how that can happen in two minutes. Knobs says it all comes down to this f*cking match, surely pleasing Scott Rutherford.

We get three matches tonight!

Match 1: Jabroni Match
Candy Girl & Tiffany (w/Frank J. Cleopatra Stallone) vs. Mistress Of Mayhem & Red Hot Redneck

There’s not too much to this match, really…it’s just there to warm up the crowd and introduce Stallone’s homage to “Exotic” Adrian Street. After some catfighting Tiffany & Candy Girl work over RHR a little bit until she makes the tag to MOM. Candy gets thrown into Stallone, and MOM hits the cross-body for a three count.

Winners: Mistress Of Mayhem & Red Hot Redneck

Stallone gets run off after the match by “Dangerous” Danny Bonaduce.

Pep talk time! The celebrities all want to win. There’s gonna be one person standing. The ring announcer introduces the judges & coaches.

Match 2: Tag Team Match
Mr. Not So Perfect & The Winner vs. One Mean Bean & Rodzilla

NSP & Winner attack at the bell, but Rod & Bean fight right back and toss them into each other. NSP & Winner then get tossed outside and after things settle down a bit its NSP & Rod in the ring. NSP works Rodzilla over, but misses the cartwheel elbow. Rod uses ugly hip tosses on NSP & Winner, Winner gets whipped into NSP and Bean comes in and splashes them both! Rodzilla splashes all three of them and NSP headbutts Winner in the groin when he falls to the mat. Winner gets whipped by Bean into Rod’s boot. Bean slams both NSP & Winner, but misses a splash into the corner. NSP hits Bean with a chair behind the referee’s back! Double shoulderblock and stomps on the Bean, and he gets tossed outside. NSP does a swandive onto Bean! Bean gets thrown into the steps and then back in the ring Winner loads up his elbow pad and smashes Bean with it. NSP with a big splash on Bean, but Bean comes back and clotheslines them both! They desperately try to keep Bean from making the tag, but he does and Rodzilla slams both of them and plays to the crowd. Noggin knocker! Mean Bean hits his slam and Rodzilla hits the flying clothesline for the three count!

Winners: One Mean Bean & Rodzilla

Two will head to the finals. Eric puts Dennis over, and Jimmy says that he would love to manage Butterbean. Hulk tells Todd that he takes too many chances and tells Dustin that he did a good job, but they have to cut bait. Dustin Diamond & Butterbean are eliminated.

Butterbean wants to take on both the finalists, and Dustin says he will come back next season and take the belt. Is that allowed? I need a copy of the CCW rulebook so I can know for sure.

Match 3: Final Match
Mr. Not So Perfect vs. Rodzilla

NSP slaps Rod and ducks out of the ring. Rod chases him around and gets stomped upon entering the ring. NSP rams Rod’s head into the turnbuckle, but it has no effect. Rod slaps NSP and rams his head into the turnbuckle ten times, which has some effect. Punches, and off goes NSP’s hat! He bald, yo. Splash in the corner by Rod, and he clotheslines NSP over the top rope. NSP yanks Rod out to the floor and rams him into the ring post. He sets up a table and throws Rod through it! NSP puts his hat back on and they head back into the ring. A cover gets two. Rod fights back, but NSP gets the sunset flip for two. Rod rips his shirt off and hulks up, brother. Slam by Rod and a legdrop! Into the corner, splash by Rod, he whips NSP down to the mat, heads to the middle rope and hits the flying clothesline for three!

Winner: Rodzilla

Hulk says they stepped it up and took pro wrestling to a whole new level. Their decision is more than tough. The judges put them over and Hulk takes the belt down to the ring. Hulk crowns the first CCW Champion…Rodzilla! Confetti rains down on the arena and all the celebrities come down to celebrate.

Todd thinks he should have won. He seems bitter.

Hulk asks us what we’re gonna do, and that’s the end of Season 1.

So what have we learned over this season?

-Having wrestled in PPV main events will probably help you do well in a wrestling competition.
-Danny Bonaduce is insane. (OK, we already knew this)
-Dustin Diamond can’t chop or kick anybody.
-Body slamming makes you feel like a man.
-People are always inspired when Hulk Hogan gives them a pep talk.
-RVD may or may not be signing with Celebrity Championship Wrestling.
-Trishelle will be a future Mrs. Steve Cook.
-Brutus Beefcake can’t slam Butterbean.
-Character development = changing clothes
-Andre the Giant weighed 700 pounds.

All very valuable lessons, for sure. I’m Steve Cook, and that’s a wrap!