411’s OVW TV Report 6.03.06

We are welcomed of course by Armando Alejandro Rodriguez!

Armando: Hola! Everybody listen…haha…to me. Welcome to the Spanish version of OVW TV. I am your host. Aramndooo Alejandrooooo Estrrrrrrrrrr…..rrrrrrrrr….rrrrrrrrada! Just like the rollercoaster haha! Amigos! We’ve got big news! Regarding the June 16th Super Summer Sizzler Series at Los Kentuckos Kingdom. Appearing live, June 16th…is going to be…the biggest benadaro walking the face of the earth. 75 feet tall. 23, 900 pounds. It’s going to be the Big Show! You wanna know how this happened? I made it happened! Because I want you to vote for Lalo to be dicator of Los Kentuckos. I’m going to appoint Maria…Secretary of Prostitution! Haha! Now, moving on, tonight it’s going to be that reality guy going one on one with the OVW Television Champion Seth Skyfire. And Ronnie Jona and that crazy wench Shelley are going to be handcuffed to Senior Official Robert Brisko! You want to know what’s worse than being handcuffed to that crazy chick? It’s Robert Brisko being handcuffed to two women! *Shelley opens the door behind him and has a pair of handcuffs* Ahhhhh….

Shelley: Oooo, I like handcuffs. The feeling of cold….hard….steel….pressing on my wrist, the slight condition of pain….YOU LIKE PAIN…don’t you Armando?

Armando: Who me? You crazy woooooo? I like pleasure ok. One time in Miami…

Shelley: TONIGHT! I’m going to be handcuffed to Ronnie Jona! Brisko thinks he’s going to keep? THERE WILL BE NO R.R.? The first attempt Ronnie makes to INTEREFERE with that match, I’m going to ATTACK! ATAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK! ATAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK! Now…..that’s what I’m…talking about.

Armando: Hey my Samoan bulldozer Umaga told me that in Samoa they practice canabilism. Now I see why. She’s a crazy wench! Cut it!

“Let the bodies hit the floor!”

Boris Alexiev vs. T.J. Dalton

Boris asks to be kicked by Dalton. Dalton kicks and it doesn’t faze Boris. Boris asks for another and again no effect. Boris with a very rapid series of kicks. Headbutt by Boris. Takedown by Boris. Boris sizing him up. Armbar submission on Dalton! Dalton taps.

Winner- Boris Alexiev

Miz comes to the ring with Ronnie and grabs the mic.

Miz: As if I’m not mad enough, you’re going to sit here and cheer for Seth and Shelley? Are you kidding me? I am the biggest superstar of reality TV! The Miz Hoo-rah! What is it? Do I have an ego problem? Is that what it is? Well I’ve been on 9 television reality shows. How many have you been on? Zero! You see that is what I like to call STAR POWER! My ego needs to be fed. It has cravings. It needs to be fed by someone that’s loveable…sexy. No not you fattie. I’m talking about Ronnie Jona. *they lick tongues* Hoooo-rah. You see, tonight is going to be history in the making. The Miz has an OVW TV Title Match! *I can’t understand his mic, they used a blown out mic* You see, tonight has to be handcuffed to Brisko so she will not put her hands on you. But Ronnie has to be handcuffed as well. So that’s another distraction I’ll have to worry about. So when you step into this ring Seth, and you bring your title to the ring for the last time, you can be good, you can be bad but there’s nothing like being The Miz! Hoooo-rah!

The Miz w/ Ronnie Jona vs. Seth Skyfire -c- w/ Shelley (OVW TV Title)

Shelley chargs to the ring with Skyfire and tackles Shelley to the mat. Miz grabs her by the hair and tries to break them off. Skyfire grabs Miz from behind and sends him to the ropes and double arm clotheline from Skyfire. Skyfire with Miz. Sends him to the ropes. Puts his head down and Miz kicks him. Miz charges to the ropes. Skyfire grabs him and tosses him through the middle rope. On the outside. Shelley is chasing Ronnie and Brisko is chasing them both. The other ref stops the women and now Brisko handcuffs Shelley first then Ronnie. On the other side of the ring Skyfire working on Miz and the bell just now rings. Skyfire flips over the ropes with a sunset flip. Miz hangs on to the ropes and twists around for an elbow drop that misses. Skyfire with a standing Moonsault! The cover 1…2…No!

Skyfire with a forearm and an Irish whip reversed by Miz. Skyfire leaps over Miz. Ducks a clotheline. Jumps to the second rope and goes for a body press but nobody home! Miz rams Skyfire into the steel post and Skyfire falls onto the floor. Miz on the outside and slams Skyfire’s arm on the concrete. Miz slams Skyfire’s arm on the edge of the ring and tosses him back in. Miz with a cover gets 2. Another cover gets 2. And another gets 2. Miz throws a fit. Miz with an arm submission. Skyfire works out of it with some fists to the gut. Toss by Skyfire. Elbow to the head by Miz. Miz charges in the corner but Skyfire moves. Skyfire throws a few fists and takes him down with a double arm clotheline. Miz off the ropes and Skyfire lands his matrix kick! Skyfire is pumped up. Skyfire gets distracted by the women at ringside. From behind The Miz with a rollup! 1…2…. NO!

Skyfire ducks a clotheline! Double cross body takes both men down! On the outside the women have hit Brisko and are now trading fists with Brisko in between. Ronnie takes Shelley down with a haymaker. Ronnie is in the ref’s pocket and she gets the key! She gets her handcuffs free! Ronnie getting in the ring by Shelley grabs her by her feet and starts pummeling her! The ref falls down with them. Inside the ring Skyfire is watching. Miz from behind with a big shot to the back. Boot to the gut by Miz! Sets him up for The Mizzard of Oz! Reversed by Skyfire! HUGE INZUGURI! Skyfire with the cover! 1…2…3!

Winner And STILL OVW TV Champion- Seth Skyfire

Charles Evans w/ Kenny Bolin vs. Mickey Batts

Evans is a big big man. Batts ducks the lockup and clubs on the back of Evans. Evans grabs Batts by the throat and shoves him across the ring. Batts charges and slides under Evan’s clotheline and lands a few more punches and knocks Evans into the ropes. Again Evans takes Batts and slams him into the turnbuckle. Evans charges at the turnbuckle but Batts moves. Dropkick by Batts. Batts climbs on Evans back but Evans runs backwards into the corner and Batts falls off. Bolin on the outside waving his finger. Big elbow on Batts. Evans lifts up Batts. Batts wiggles out. Batts leaps to the top turnbuckle and dives but Evans catches him. Evans guerrila press slam and tosses him across the ring. Evans choking Batts and lands a couple of knees into his side. Evans lifts up Batts and tosses him across the top rope. Batts up and lands a few punches to the gut of Evans. Evans with a big knee lift. Evans grabs him crom behind and squeezing Batts. Batts tries to punch Evan’s hands. Headbutt by Evans. Evans to the ropes. BIG SPLASH…MISSES! Batts crawls between Evans legs. Batts goes for an Irish Whip by Evans too strong and holds him. Batts leaps up to the middle rope but Evans catches him across his shoulder. EVANS DROPS TO A KNEE WITH BATTS ACROSS HIS SHOULDER AND BREAKS HIM IN HALF! THE COVER 1…2…3!

Winner- Charles Evans

Mikey and Johnny of the Spirit Squad are in the back walking!

Mikey: World’s Tag Team Champions!

Johnny: Oh hey Mikey look it’s Maria. Say hi to Maria.

Mikey: Hi Maria!

Johnny: I have an idea. Why don’t you find a tag team partner so you can take on the World Tag Team Champions huh?

Maria: Why don’t you and your big friend over here stop picking on girls. I mean two weeks ago I met up with Shad Gaspard and…

Johnny: Hey! I don’t care who you met up with. You need to realize who you are talking to. We are the World Tag Team Champions. Understand that.

C.M. Punk: From one champion to another Johnny if you don’t get your hand off of her I’m going to break it off permanently!

Johnny: Hey Mikey look. Look at this hero. It’s the clown who made an illegal chokehold that cost me my OVW Heavyweight Title.

Punk: Such an “illegal hold” made you tap out and I’m still the OVW Heavyweight Champion.

Mikey: Well maybe if you find some tag team partner…

Johnny: He can’t find a tag team partner. He’s the loner…oooooo of OVW.

Mikey: Well maybe he can find out who the real tag team champions really are.

Punk: Tag team partner? Challenge accepted ladies. We’ll see you in the ring.

Johnny: Good luck finding a partner…loner!

Mikey: What a loser!

The Neighborhoodie w/ Shad Gaspard vs. Kasey James w/ Roadkill

They lock up and Hoodie gets James in the corner. Ref asks for the break but Hoodie lands a big chop block. Hoodie dances around and James lands a big chop across Hoodie when he turns around. And another. Irish whip by James. James charges and lands a big elbow. The cover gets 2. James with an armbar. Hoodie makes it to the ropes and the ref breaks it off. They circle and James ducks a lockup. James with a takedown and a side headlock. Shoulders are down and James gets two. Irish whip by James. James charges but Hoodie moves and flapjack by Hoodie on James gets a 2.

Hoodie sends James across the ring for a ride. Puts his head down but James holds on to the ropes. Hoodie up and James charges with a big clotheline! And a big fist to the chin! And another! Dropkick by James. James with the cover 1..2..No! James sends Hoodie to the ropes reversed by Hoodie. Shad grabs James boot! James shakes loose. Hoodie running at James. JAMES LIFTS UP HOODIE AND LANDS A HUGE SIT DOWN POWERBOMB! Shad on the apron! Roadkill there to land a big fists on Shad. In the ring from behind Hoodie underneath James and nails a low blow! Rolls him up! 1..2…3!

Winner- The Neighborhooide

Simon Dean is here and is wrestling!

Simon Dean vs. Shawn Spears

Dean checks his pulse. Nova chants start. They lock up. Dean with a takedown and celebrates. Spears ducks a lockup and grabs Dean from behind. Dean reverses around it and takes down Spears. Spears tries to get the crowd clapping but they ignore him. Spears grabs Dean’s hand and Dean takes him down into an arm. Spears reverses and Dean backs Spears into a corner and breaks it off with an elbow to the face. Spears ducks a short clotheline from Dean. Couple of chops from Spears. Spears to the ropes but Dean NAILS him with a forearm! Dean drops a knee on Spears. Dean setting Spears up for a suplex. Spears reverses and rolls him up! 1…2…3! Upset City!

Winner- Shawn Spears

After the match Dean complains then wants to shake Spears hands. Now asking for a high five. Spears falls for it and catches a big boot to the gut now Dean attacking Spears as the ref rings the bell. Scoop slam on the outside on Spears and a hop onto the ribs of Spears. Dean grabs him and nearly tosses him through the bottom of the announcers desk! Al Snow gets in his face and grabs Dean’s arm! DEAN SHOVES AL SNOW BY THE FACE AND SNOW IS PISSED! SNOW LEAPS ACROSS THE DESK AND ATTACKS SIMON DEAN! EVERYONE IS OUT TO BREAK THEM UP! E-C-DUB CHANTS! SNOW BREAKS THROUGH THE REFS AND STARTS CHOKING DEAN! DEAN RETREATS! SNOW GETS AWAY AND CHARGES AT DEAN BUT DEAN HAS A CHAIR AND HE LEVELS AL SNOW! DEAN WITH THE CHAIR AND HE NAILS SNOW OVER AND OVER AGAIN! DEAN HILL TRIES TO STOP HIM BUT DEAN KEEPS NAILING SNOW! DEAN GETS IN SNOW’S FACE. THE REFS TRY TO BREAK THEM UP BUT DEAN BODY SLAMS A REF! HE SLAPS ANOTHER REF! WOW! THAT WOKE UP THE SHOW!

Dean Hill is back and is alone with the mic.

Hill: I’ve been around here a long time and I worked with a lot of people who have been my broadcast partner. Some of these people have become personal friends of mine. Al Snow is a personal friend of mine. I have the upmost respect for him as an athelte and a trainer around here but as a man. I’m telling you right here tonight. Simon Dean has crossed the line that should not be crossed. Some point, some place, Al Snow is going to get his hands on Simon Dean and the results are going to be severe.

Maria is in the back now.

Maria: Oh my gosh I can’t believe what just happened with Al Snow. I’m going to make it my priotity to get an update. I’m here with OVW Heavyweight Champion C.M. Punk and first of I owe you a big…

Punk: You don’t owe me anything. It’s my pleasure to help you out when it comes to the Spirit Squad. I know a lot of people are gunning for the OVW Heavyweight Championship. And I’m happy to give anybody the fight they ask for. But tonight, I’ve got a friend and he’s watching my back. The only thing I’m going to divulge at this moment, myself and my partner, are ready to take The Spirit Squad….To the extreme!

Elijah Burke comes down to the ring with the mic!

Burke: Simon Dean you..are a low life! You are a coward! I was one of the men that put out…Miami. And you refuse to stay down. And I come out here to tell you Simon Dean, June 16th, Six Flags Kentucky Kingdom. You my friend, have hell to pay…you bastard! And I can assure on behalf of the Snowman himself, you are going to have an experience that you will ever forget! Ever!

Johnny & Mikey vs. C.M. Punk & ?????

Punk comes out and holds his title up. Music hits and Punk’s partner comes out! It’s Tommy Dreamer! E-C-Dub chants start again!

Punk and Dreamer charge to the ring and are met by Johnny and Mikey. Dreamer nailing Mikey with some punches. Both men send Johnny and Mikey to the ropes and double hiptoss! Dreamer grabs Punk and sends him to the ropes. Punk off the ropes and DIVES THROUGH THE MIDDLE ROPE AND TAKES BOTH MEN DOWN! Punk holding both men up and Dreamer with a double baseball slide! Dreamer slams Mikey’s haead into the desk. Dreamer with a trashbasket and slams it on Mikey’s head. It was plastic. Dreamer with Johnny in the ring now. Abdominal stretch by Dreamer. Punk in and lands a kick into Johnny’s chest while in the stretch. Punk with a trip and Dreamer drops an elbow. Punk with a cover gets 1. Punk hooks him up and plants a neckbreaker. Cover gets 2. Punk slams Johnny’s head into Dreamer’s boot then makes the tag to Dreamer. Dreamer sizes up Johnny and lands a big kick to the gut. Dreamer lifts up Johnny over his shoulder. Johnny wiggles out and pushes Dreamer to the ropes. Dreamer lands a big punch on Mikey. Dreamer turns around to a boot to the gut by Johnny. Johnny slams Dreamer into the steel post. Baseball slide by Johnny knocks Dreamer outside. Mikey on the outside and slams Dreamer’s shoulder into the apron. Johnny on the outside and shoves Dreamer back in. Johnny with a rollup gets 2. Johnny drags Dreamer to his corner and tags in Mikey. Mikey slams Dreamer’s arm into the mat. Dreamer in the corner. Arm takedown by Mikey and the cover gets 1. Another cover for 1. Mikey with an arm submission behind Dreamer’s back. Punk comes in to break the hold. Ref pushes Punk back and Johnny comes in without the tag.

Johnny working on Dreamer’s bad arm. Johnny pushes Dreamer’s shoulders down and gets 2! Mikey in with the tag and taunts Punk. Mikey stomping on Dreamer’s head. Dreamer is up and fighting back. Mikey fights back and putshis bad arm in another submission. Dreamer to his feet and back drops Mikey! Dreamer dives and tags in PunK! Punk in! Takes down Johnny! Dropkick for Mikey! Irish whip by Punk. Punk off the ropes with a back heel trip. Running knee lift for Johnny. Running knee lift for Mikey in the opposite corner! Bulldog clotheline combo on Johnny and Mikey! The cover on Johnny! 1…2…NO!

Punk sends Johnny to the ropes. Reversed by a boot to the gut by Johnny. Johnny off the ropes. Punk catches him and Spinebuster! The cover is broken by Mikey. Chop chop backchop. Punk sets Johnny up for a backbreaker. Mikey off the ropes dropkicks Punk and Johnny bridges Punk! The cover 1….2….No! Very close! Mikey holds up Punk. Johnny taunts Punk and lands a spinning heel kick on Punk! Johnny with the cover 1…2….No! Dreamer with the save!

Mikey Irish whip Dreamer. Dreamer backdrops Mikey all the way to the outside. Dreamer grabs Johnny. Johnny breaks it off and SUPERKICK BY JOHNNY TAKES DOWN DREAMER! JOHNNY TAKES DOWN THE STRAPS OF HIS A-SHIRT! Punk is up and ANACONDA VICE ON JOHNNY! JOHNNY SQUIRMS AND REACHES FOR THE ROPES! HE’S IN THE CENTER OF THE RING! MIKEY IN WITH THE OVW TITLE! DREAMER CATCHES HIM AND DEATH VALLEY DRIVER! DREAMER LOCKS IN THE CROSSFACE WHILE PUNK HAS THE ANACONDA VICE! THEY’RE BOTH GOING TO TAP! WAIT! GASPARD AND THE NEIGHBORHOODIE ARE IN AND STOMP ON PUNK AND DREAMER! REF CALLS FOR THE BELL!

Winners by DQ- C.M. Punk & Tommy Dreamer

Gaspard has Punk in the corner and is pummeling him. Hoodie has Dreamer. Big Splash by The Hoodie on Punk. Gaspard grabs Dreamer SIT DOWN POWERBOMB BY GASPARD! Gaspard and The Neighborhoodie celebrate over top of Dreamer.