411’s WWE Heat Report 05.04.08

Hey guys and gals, I’m Scott, and this is 411’s ALL-NEW, ALL-DIFFERENT WWE Heat Report.

I’ve always prided myself on writing the Best Damn Heat Report on the Net, and part of being the best is continually striving to improve. So recently I was proud to debut a completely new format for the Heat Report. The most dramatic change was a drastic reduction in the length of the play-by-play. I loved writing in-depth, detailed reports of each match, but I completely understand that most readers would rather just get right to the highlights. So from now on I’m going to be presenting a more condensed Overview of each match in order to give you a clear view of the main events while skipping over some of the more minor details. However, in order to compensate for the abbreviated length of the Overview, I’m also going to be adding a Background, Analysis, and Rating for each match. The Background will provide a brief review of the recent events in the careers of each of the wrestlers involved in the match while the Analysis and Rating will allow me to give you my opinion on the quality and future implications of the match. Finally, I’ll still include the Result, Length, and Best Spot in order to continue to provide the most complete coverage possible. Okay, enough with the boring stuff. Let’s get to the wrestling.

Match 1: Shad Gaspard w/ JTG vs. Charlie Haas

Background: Shad Gaspard and his partner JTG have been on a roll since returning to Raw after WrestleManaia 24. Cryme Tyme defeated Lance Cade & Trevor Murdoch in tag team action on the 03.31.08 episode of Raw, and JTG defeated Trevor Murdoch in singles action on the 04.14.08 episode of Raw. Shad will be looking to defeat former tag team specialist Charlie Haas in order to move Cryme Tyme ever closer to a shot at the World Tag Team Championships. On the other side of the ring, Charlie Haas is still struggling to find success with his new luchador gimmick. In the past month he has lost to up-and-coming star Cody Rhodes as well as not-so-up-and-coming veteran “Hacksaw” Jim Duggan while only defeating the floundering Super Crazy. Haas will be looking to pick up a win over the big man in order to prove that he can still find a way to win.

Overview: Shad muscles Haas to the corner, but Haas fakes a cheap shot from Shad in order to get the referee to create some distance. Haas then connects with his own cheap shot to Shad, lays into him with a volley of clubbing forearm shots to the back, and chokes him across the second rope before going to work with a barrage of cross-face shots. Haas slams Shad’s head into the top turnbuckle, lands a pair of shoulder shots to the gut, and pounds away on Shad’s face. Shad fights back with a big back body drop, a running shoulder block, and a running clothesline as JTG sneaks around the ring and steals Haas’ mask from under the ring. Shad charges at Haas in the corner, but Haas just manages to slide out of the way causing Shad to post himself. Haas crawls out of the ring and looks for his mask under the ring, but that’s when he sees that JTG has already stolen it. JTG PUTS ON THE MASK! LUCHA JTG! LUCHA JTG! LUCHA JTG! Haas slides back into the ring and heads for JTG, but Shad drops him with a single punch. Shad drags Haas back to his feet, drills him with an STO, and gets the three count. After the match, JTG and Shad sell Haas’ mask to another satisfied customer in the crowd.

Analysis: This match wasn’t nearly as good as it should have been, but that is almost entirely due to the fact that it was only given two minutes. Shad Gaspard is remarkably quick and technically proficient for a big man, and Charlie Haas is still one of the best technical wrestlers in the world in spite of being stuck with a dead-end gimmick. Given eight or ten minutes, this could have been a really solid big man / little man match, but two minutes just wasn’t enough time to build any momentum or tell any sort of compelling story. Sure, Cryme Tyme’s post-match shenanigans were as entertaining as always and will help to get them over with the crowd, but it’s hard for me to justify allowing a tag team to get over with their mic work without giving them the time to back it up with compelling ring work. But hey, Lucha JTG was awesome, so it wasn’t a complete loss…

Result: Shad Gaspard defeats Charlie Haas with the STO.
Length: 2:04
Best Spot: Shad’s STO
Rating: ½*

Match 2: “Hacksaw” Jim Duggan vs. Snitsky

Background: WWE veteran and Heat mainstay “Hacksaw” Jim Duggan has had mixed luck on Heat in the past few weeks. Four weeks ago he was bested by “The Canadian Bulldog” DH Smith, but three weeks ago he rebounded with a win over Charlie Haas. Duggan will be looking to score the win and prove that he is still a force be reckoned with on Heat. On the other side of the ring, Snitsky has been on a real roll since WrestleMania 24. In the past month he’s defeated jobber JT Flash, former Mexicool Super Crazy, and former porn star Val Venis on Heat. That’s like sixty percent of the Village People right there. Snitsky will be looking to squash Duggan in this match and prove his mettle against an established veteran.

Overview: Snitsky shoves Duggan to the corner and then flexes his pecs in Duggan’s general direction. This match is going downhill fast, and we’re only thirty seconds into it. Snitsky again shoves Duggan to the corner and goes for a running back elbow shot, but Duggan just manages to slide out of the way causing Snitsky to ram his ribs into the top turnbuckle. Duggan pounds away on Snitsky in the corner, but Snitsky fights back with a boot to the gut before successfully slamming Duggan’s head into the top turnbuckle. Holy shit, when was the last time you saw someone actually get that move to work on Duggan? That’s some historic shit right there, boys and girls. Anyway, Snitsky pounds away on Duggan in the corner and stomps a mud hole in him before choking him with his boot. Duggan fights back and connects with a running clothesline, but Snitsky doesn’t even budge. Duggan connects with a second running clothesline, but again Snitsky no sells it. Duggan goes for a third running clothesline, but this time Snitsky catches him with a knee shot to the gut. Snitsky chokes Duggan across the second rope, traps him in the corner, and connects with a series of shoulder shots to the gut. Snitsky drags Duggan back to the middle of the ring, lands an elbow drop to the chest, and gets a two count. Duggan fights back up to his feet and connects with a couple of punches to Snitsky’s face, but Snitsky drops him with a knee shot to the jaw. Snitsky drags Duggan back to his feet and locks in a bear hug, but Duggan refuses to submit. Duggan finally breaks the hold, but Snitsky levels him with a shoulder block. Snitsky goes for a leg drop, but Duggan just manages to roll out of the way and avoid contact. Duggan pounds away on Snitsky and tries to whip Snitsky to the corner, but Snitsky reverses and instead whips Duggan to the corner. Snitsky goes for a Big Boot in the corner, but Duggan just manages to slide out of the way causing Snitsky to get his leg hung up on the top rope. Duggan heads to the opposite corner and goes for the Three Point Stance Running Clothesline, but instead Snitsky damn near decapitates him with a Big Boot for the three count.

Analysis: This match may not have looked pretty on paper, and it certainly wasn’t a technical masterpiece, but it was a fairly effective way to continue to establish Snitsky as a monster heel. Don’t get me wrong – I don’t think that Snitsky will ever enjoy the kind of success that Khali has found or the kind of popularity that Umaga has earned. But I do have to admit that Snitsky is clearly trying his best to improve in the ring, and I commend him for that. And given the fact that WWE seems to want to continue to push him, picking up victories over established veterans like Duggan should help to legitimize him in the eyes of the fans.

Result: Snitsky defeats “Hacksaw” Jim Duggan with the Big Boot.
Length: 4:21
Best Spot: Snitsky’s Big Boot
Rating: ½*

Match 3: Hardcore Holly vs. “The Canadian Bulldog” DH Smith

Background: Hardcore Holly currently holds the World Tag Team Championship along with his partner, rising star Cody Rhodes. They’ve been mired in a feud with Carlito & Santino Marella for the better part of the year, but from time to time they each make a stop on Heat to keep their singles skills fresh. On the other side of the ring, “The Canadian Bulldog” DH Smith is still discovering just how long and winding the path to stardom can be. In the past month he’s defeated “Hacksaw” Jim Duggan and Super Crazy but been defeated by fellow upstart Paul Burchill. A win over one half of the World Tag Team Champions would go a long way toward establishing Smith’s credibility and possibly earning him more airtime on Raw.

Overview: Smith has morphed back into heel mode in order to play the foil to Holly’s veteran face role. Smith takes control early with a standing side head lock before dropping Holly with a running shoulder block. Holly retaliates with a standing side head lock of his own, but Smith regains control with a second shoulder block. Smith goes back to the standing side head lock, but this time Holly catches him with a pair of running shoulder blocks before laying into him with a pair of punches and a back elbow shot to the face. Smith fights back with a kick to Holly’s gut before slamming Holly’s head into the top turnbuckle, but Holly catches Smith with a standing drop kick as we head to commercial.

We’re back from the break, and Smith appears to be back in control. Smith whips Holly to the ropes and goes for a back body drop, but Holly floats over and lands on his feet. However, Holly appeared to have injured his knee as he landed, so Smith goes right to work with a kick to the injured knee. Smith wrenches on Holly’s knee, drops an elbow down onto the knee, and then kicks it again. Smith catches Holly with a snap mare takedown and then locks in what looks to be some sort of modified Indian Death Lock. Holly punches his way out of the hold, but Smith traps him in the corner and wrenches his knee around the second rope. Holly fights back and goes for the Alabama Slam, but his knee buckles and he can’t hit the move. Smith regains control with a sweet modified drop toe hold into a unique leg submission. I would have called it a modified grapevined ankle lock, but Josh Mathews calls it a single-leg figure four leg lock. Hey, works for me. Holly tries to make it to the ropes, but Smith drags him back to the middle of the ring and switches to an STF. Holly finally makes it to the ropes to break the hold, but Smith again drags him back to the middle of the ring and locks in another leg submission. Smith drapes Holly’s leg across the bottom rope and springboards down onto it, but when he tries it again Holly kicks him over the top rope and down to the floor. Holly retrieves Smith from the outside and goes to work with a volley of punches and a knee to the jaw. Holly hits the overhead cam, guts out an Alabama Slam, and gets the three count.

Analysis: This probably wasn’t what you would call a great match, but it was a good match that was booked really well. First, it was given almost ten minutes, and that allowed Holly and Smith to actually tell a story in the ring. Second, the main theme of the match was Smith focusing on Holly’s injured knee and using a plethora of different moves to try to exploit Holly’s weakness. That was a great way to allow Smith to dominate for the majority of the match while highlighting his technical prowess. Finally, the right guy got the win. There’s certainly value in having a rising star get the better of an established veteran, but you have to be careful when that veteran is also holding gold at the time. Having Smith defeat Holly in this match would have harmed to the World Tag Team Championship more that it would have helped Smith’s career, so I absolutely agree with having Holly man up and score the pin. So while this wasn’t a flashy match or one that we’ll likely remember for very long, it was a fundamentally solid match that was booked quite well. And that alone makes it something of a rare gem in today’s sports entertainment landscape.

Result: Hardcore Holly defeats “The Canadian Bulldog” DH Smith with the Alabama Slam.
Length: 9:54 (including commercial)
Best Spot: Holly’s Alabama Slam
Rating: **

Okay kids, that’s it for this edition of Heat. Hope you had fun. Feel free to email me with any comments or suggestions. I’ll see you back here next weekend.