411’s WWE Smackdown Report 12.10.10

Welcome to the WWE Smackdown Report!

In order to change things up a little bit, I have dug into the 2010 Smackdown archives and recorded the Win/Loss record of every current Smackdown superstar. Here are a few guidelines:

– These records only reflect matches that have taken place on Smackdown or Pay-Per-View.
– Matches that end or have ended in a No Contest are not counted.
– In the case of Tag Team matches, each member of the losing team gets a Loss and each member of the winning team gets a Win.
– In the case of multi-man matches, every participant besides the winner gets a Loss.
– Some wrestlers will have a third number in their record. This number represents matches that have ended in a Draw.

No Green Day, pyro, or Todd Grisham this week. Josh Matthews joins Michael Cole and Matt Striker at the announce booth.

Straight to Kane’s entrance for our show-opening promo. This has gone on for way too long. All Kane wants is his father back. Edge has tortured Paul Bearer as if he were a little toy. He isn’t a toy; he is Kane’s father. Kane has done everything Edge has asked, and yet he insists on amusing himself with the one person in this world Kane cares about. Kane isn’t a monster; he has feelings. This is tearing his heart out. Edge is the monster. Now, Kane is begging Edge- please, please give him his father back. This has to end. One way or another, this has to end tonight. Please…

With that, Edge appears on the TennesseeTron. This all ends at TLC. Oh, look what he has stumbled across- Bearer and a steel chair. Edge is the TLC master, but it’s been a while since he has swung a chair. He is a little rusty, so he is going to practice on Bearer. He teases hitting him from behind twice, then connects on the third. Kane has had enough. He storms out of the ring and to the back. He finds Edge and begs him to stop. Edge warns him to not take another step. Kane takes a step, still pleading. Bad move. Edge hits a fallen Bearer with the chair again, con-chair-to style, and runs away. Kane approaches Bearer to find it was only a dummy. Edge is heard from behind some stairs. That’s not the dummy Kane’s looking for; the real one is right here. Tootle-lo!

Match One: Jack Swagger (13-21-1) vs. Kaval (2-7)
A guy who definitely fits the IWC mold has an “I Paid To See Kaval” sign. Lockup to start and Swagger powers Kaval into the corner. He clubs the back and delivers some kicks. He sends Kaval to another corner and charges, but Kaval gets both feet up and kicks him away. Kaval comes back with a running kick for two. He gets in another kick and escapes a Swagger bodyslam attempt. It looks like Kaval hurt his leg on the landing and the ref won’t let Swagger attack. Kaval gets back to his feet and Swagger focuses on the injured leg. He covers for two and applies a standing leg lock. Kaval kicks him away but can’t get up. Swagger wraps the leg around the ropes and breaks on the ref’s count. Kaval comes back with chops and blocks a gutwrench powerbomb. Kaval can’t capitalize though, as he is still favoring the leg. He shows some life by ducking a clothesline and delivering some kicks, but Swagger puts a stop to it with a knee lift. He goes for a vertical suplex but Kaval knees his way out and connects with another running kick. He hits with a kick to the back of the head and slowly approaches Swagger in the corner. It takes too long and Swagger is able to get a go-behind. Swagger retreats and charges but Kaval avoids it and comes off the middle rope with a knee to the head. Cover gets two and Kaval heads to the top. He can’t make it up with the bum leg and Swagger takes advantage by taking out the leg through the ropes. Back in the middle of the ring, Swagger applies the anklelock for the win.
Winner: Jack Swagger in 5:00
Rating: ** (The selling of the injured leg was really well done. However, with news that Kaval may actually be injured, it may not have been “selling.” Good win for Swagger after a string of loses.)

Post-match, Jack Swagger gets on the mic. That is how it is done. When you absolutely, positively need results spelled out, it’s S-W-A-G-G-E-R. What happened last week was a travesty- Kofi Kingston should not be the Number One Contender for the Intercontinental Championship. Swagger argues that he was clearly struck while in the ropes, which is illegal according to him. Tonight, he is protesting the IC Championship match. He is the future 5th face on Mount Rushmore and the All-American-American-American. Any IC Championship match without him is unacceptable.

Up next, Hornswoggle vs. The Swagger Soaring Eagle. We even get a Tale of the Tape for it. Brilliant!

Match Two: Hornswoggle (1-0) vs. The Eagle Who May or May Not Still Soar (0-0)
There’s a bit of a dilemma here: Justin Roberts announces the SSE as “The Soaring Eagle”; however, his name graphic simply reads “The Eagle.” Cole says he has had his wings clipped. Horny comes to the ring with Rosa Mendes. The SSE puts his wings to Horny in the corner and backs away. Mendes slips Horny a bag of “AKME(sic) Birdseeds” and he tries to entice the Eagle with them by sprinkling them on the mat. The Eagle falls for it and Horny takes advantage with a running boot. Horny then puts on a bib, spices the Eagle’s leg with some salt and takes a bite. He then hops on the Eagles back and slaps him on the beak. The Eagle comes back with a back talon. The Eagle puts some more talons to him and calls for Ballin’. It misses and Horny sits on him. Horny heads to the top and comes down with a tadpole splash for the win.
Winner: Hornswoggle in 2:00
Rating: N/A (Harmless fun and the commentary was pretty enjoyable. The only problem is that the more camera time Rosa gets, the less of a chance Steve Cook has of getting her to work for 411.)

Later tonight, Edge teams up with Rey Mysterio to take on Kane and Alberto Del Rio.

Teddy Long is with the new WWE Tag Team Champions, Santino Marella and Vladimir Kozlov. Marella expresses his excitement with being on both shows and Kozlov delivers the line of the night: “More people for me to crush.” Marella begins to sing “We Are the Champions” as Kozlov sways a lighter in the air. Chavo Guerrero interrupts. Marella thinks he is here to take a photo with the new champs. That’s not the reason. Guerrero is here to challenge them to a match. He and his partner will rock them. Marella accepts and finishes his song. Kozlov ends it with “Holla Holla.”

Up next, Dolph Ziggler puts his Intercontinental Championship on the line against Kofi Kingston. The graphic leads to a video package on Kingston.

In the back, Todd Grisham is with Dolph Ziggler. The difference between Ziggler and Kofi Kingston is the difference between a champion and a contender. People can relate to Kingston because he is a failure. People can’t relate to Ziggler because they want to be him. After this match, Kingston will still only be a contender. Good promo.

Match Three: Intercontinental Championship- Dolph Ziggler© (20-20-1) vs. Kofi Kingston (23-11)
Looks like Ziggler needs another bleach job. I’ll take this match to point out the large “Excuse Me” sign in the audience. Good work WWE Universe! Lockup to start and Ziggler powers Kingston into the corner. Kingston ducks a jab and rolls up him for two. He gets in another quick rollup for two more and falls to a Ziggler knee lift. Ziggler continues with some stomps and a cover but Kingston kicks out at zero. Ziggler gets a snapmare and a neck snap for two and applies a modified chinlock. Kingston escapes with elbows, ducks a clothesline and delivers a monkey flip. He continues with a dropkick and a flying forearm. Kingston tries for Trouble in Paradise but Ziggler wisely rolls to the outside as we go to commercial.

Back from break, Ziggler has Kingston in a chinlock. During the break, Ziggler took control by throwing Kingston into the barricade. A Ziggler dropkick gets him a two count. An elbow drop gets him two more and he goes back to the chinlock. Kingston escapes but Ziggler comes right back with a neckbreaker for two. Back to the modified chinlock, which is applied for quite some time. Kingston eventually escapes and catches a Ziggler dropkick. He catapults Ziggler into the corner but doesn’t follow up on it. They both struggle to get to their feet and Kingston hits first with double arm chops and a dropkick. A superman punch misses and Ziggler throws him to the corner on an SOS attempt. Kingston charges out of it with a clothesline then connects with a bodyslam. He calls for a Boom Drop but Ziggler isn’t in position for it. Instead, Kingston kicks him in the gut and slugs away in the corner. He charges but Ziggler moves out of the way. Ziggler charges but gets hit with the pendulum kick. Kingston heads to the top and comes off with a missile dropkick. Vickie distracts the ref so Kingston can’t cover immediately. When he does, it only gets two. Ziggler gets a rollup out of nowhere for two. He perches Kingston on the top rope but Kingston headbutts him off and comes down with a crossbody for two. He tries to follow up with a vertical suplex but Ziggler counters it into a Sleeper. Kingston tries to escape but ends up being pushed shoulder-first into the ringpost. Ziggler approaches him and walks into a sloppy looking Trouble in Paradise. Kingston goes for the cover but Jack Swagger pulls him out of the ring for the disqualification.
Winner: Kofi Kingston in 13:00 via Disqualification, Dolph Ziggler retains
Rating: **3/4 (They’ve had better in the past. The slow parts were more frequent and extended than usual, making the whole “grasping for the ropes to reach their feet because they’re so exhausted” bit feel unwarranted. That said, they redeemed themselves in the final stretch with good, spirited action. The ending sets up a Triple Threat between Ziggler, Kingston and Swagger which could be really good.)

Post-match, Jack Swagger applies an anklelock on Kofi Kingston on the outside.

In the back, Edge is standing on a ledge above the floor. He warns Kane- who stands below- that it isn’t a dummy this time, so he shouldn’t come any closer. Kane doesn’t listen and we see Paul Bearer fall through a table. The camera moves back to Edge above and he is with the real Bearer.

Masterlock Challenge
Chris Masters is in the ring as we come back from break. During Cody Rhodes’ entrance, Michael Cole informs us that Rhodes donates his nose hairs to charity. Before Rhodes sits on the chair, he has to disinfect it with a wipe. Cole agrees with this as people like Tony Chimel have been sitting on it. Rhodes gently sits on the chair but quickly gets back up before Masters can apply the Masterlock. He pulls a nail file out of his boot and hands it to Masters. Masters throws it away and smacks him in the face a couple of times. Rhodes goes nuts, “this was given to me by God! You could never have this face!” Masters palms his face for a few seconds. Rhodes is livid, kicking away the chair and asking for his jacket. As Rhodes looks into the mirror, Masters applies the Masterlock. Rhodes can’t escape.

Later tonight, Edge/Rey Mysterio vs. Kane/Alberto Del Rio.

Match Four: Santino Marella (0-0)/Vladimir Kozlov (0-0) vs. Chavo Guerrero (1-6)/Drew McIntyre (20-21-1)
So last week McIntyre teams with Ziggler and now he’s teaming with Guerrero? They do this sort of thing with guys they have nothing else for. McIntyre deserves better. Marella and McIntyre start. Marella teases with his leg sweep thing and actually connects with an arm drag. He quickly falls to a McIntyre right hand though and tags in Kozlov. They lockup and Kozlov gets the better of it with an arm drag and some shoulderblocks in the corner. He continues with a fireman’s carry takeover. McIntyre goes to the ropes and Kozlov follows but the ref doesn’t let Kozlov attack. McIntyre takes advantage and connects with a right. Kozlov regroups and takes him down. He puts in a front facelock but McIntyre pushes him into the corner. Kozlov boots him away but Guerrero snaps his neck back on the top rope. Guerrero tags in and unloads. He slugs in the corner and applies a front facelock. Kozlov back body drops his way out and tags in Marella. McIntyre tags in at the same time but gets hit by some Marella strikes. Marella hits his usual hiptoss but McIntyre gets his leg up for the saluting headbutt. He goes for a Future Shock DDT but Guerrero tags himself in and heads to the top. The Frogsplash misses and Marella hits the Cobra for the win.
Winner: Santino Marella/Vladimir Kozlov in 3:00
Rating: * (With eight matches this year, you could say Guerrero has the veteran house show schedule when it comes to televised Smackdown shows. At least McIntyre didn’t take the pin.)

Post-match, Drew McIntyre takes Chavo Guerrero out with a Future Shock DDT.

We revisit Edge’s stunts from earlier today to hype the main event tag team match.

The TLC lineup now has Alberto Del Rio vs. Rey Mysterio in a Chairs Match. The PPV is presented by Smackdown vs. Raw 2011, so much like they did with Wade Barrett for the Bragging Rights PPV, they used a Created Wrestler version of Del Rio in the PPV graphic.

In the back, Lay-Cool makes their way to ring.

Match Five: Natalya (5-2) vs. Layla (15-12)
Beth Phoenix is at ringside. Layla kicks Natalya in the gut to start and puts in a side headlock. They do the over/under running spot and Layla ends it with an armdrag into a cover. Natalya turns it on her and covers for one. Layla elbows but Natalya hits her squatting vertical suplex for two. Layla rolls out of the ring and Natalya follows. She knocks McCool out of the way as Layla reenters the ring. Natalya tries to get back in but Layla kicks her away. Phoenix checks on Natalya. Back in, Natalya runs into a Layla boot in the corner. They take each other out with clotheslines but Layla regroups first and pulls Natalya into the middle rope. Natalya doesn’t let it faze her and she applies a Sharpshooter. McCool tries to help her but Phoenix pulls her off. Layla taps.
Winner: Natalya in 2:00
Rating: * (Not bad. No botches and the exchanges were pretty crisp, but how many more times do we have to see this?)

Up next, Edge/Rey Mysterio vs. Kane/Alberto Del Rio.

During the main event entrances, Kane never comes out. As a result, Teddy Long announces that Alberto Del Rio will have to go at it alone in a Handicap Match.

Match Six: Handicap Match- Rey Mysterio (27-12)/Edge (13-6-3) vs. Alberto Del Rio (9-5)
Mysterio begins with kicks to the legs and a snapmare. A legdrop gets him one. He wrenches the arm and kicks it. Edge tags in and shoulders Del Rio in the corner. Mysterio follows up with a basement dropkick in the corner. Del Rio sees a small opening and knees Edge. He clubs the back but falls to a flapjack. Mysterio tags in and hits a splash with assistance from Edge. Mysterio telegraphs a back body drop and kicks Del Rio in the chest. He puts him in the 619 position but Del Rio retreats to the outside. Kane appears on the entrance stage and runs down the ramp. Edge sees this and they brawl at ringside. Kane is about to chokeslam Edge but he escapes and runs to the back. Kane follows. Back in the ring, Del Rio takes advantage of a distracted Mysterio with stomps. He throws Mysterio into the turnbuckle and connects with a gutbuster for two. Del Rio applies a bodyscissors as the crowd chants “619.” Mysterio fights it off and connects with some kicks. An enzuigiri lands Del Rio in the corner. Mysterio charges but ends up on the apron. Del Rio returns the favor with an enzuigiri of his own. Outside, Del Rio rams Mysterio into the announce table. Back in, Del Rio climbs the turnbuckle with Mysterio and tries for a superplex. Mysterio knocks him off and comes down with a seated senton. He springboards off the middle rope into a wheel barrel and finishes it with a bulldog. Cover gets two. Del Rio comes back with a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for two. He goes for a sunset flip but Mysterio rolls through and kinda sits on Del Rio. He kicks him in the back and sets him up for a 619. It connects and he comes off the top rope with a splash for the win.
Winner: Rey Mysterio/Edge in 7:00
Rating: **1/2 (I don’t love Handicap matches, but this wasn’t bad as it was mostly Mysterio/Del Rio. Kane not showing up makes sense as he had Bearer on his mind and Edge walking out is in line with his tweener character. I do wonder where Edge hid Bearer during the match though.)

In the back, Edge is looking up at Paul Bearer sitting on a table perched on top of two ladders. Kane chases Edge away. Another dummy huh, Edge? Kane is about to knock the ladders off the ledge when Edge warns him, “I wouldn’t do that.” Kane says whatever and does it anyway. He looks down and realizes it was the real Bearer. Edge shrugs his shoulders and says “I told you” to end the show.

(Without Todd Grisham, the show felt a little different- I enjoyed the commentary for once. Michael Cole was actually pretty funny and his bickering with Matt Striker was kept in check by Josh Matthews. I did miss Tony Chimel though. On the wrestling side of things, the Kane/Edge feud is becoming repetitive. Hopefully tonight’s ending will steer it in a different direction. It’s good to see that Jack Swagger is finally getting back on track- it could breathe some life into a somewhat stale Intercontinental Championship picture. It’s also good to see Masters on the winning end of something. He has improved by leaps and bounds and deserves to be more than a JTTS.)