411’s WWE Smackdown Report 2.10.05

It’s another all new episode of WWE’s Thursday night juggernaught, SmackDown! We are taped from Tokyo, Japan in the Saitama Super Arena. The commentary team, as always, is Michael Cole and Tazz.

Eddy Guerrero vs. Kenzo Suzuki

Kenzo gets booed, even in Japan! Shows him for ruvving Amelica, boy. “Eddy!” chants begin as Kenzo goes wild in the ring. “Kenzo sucks!” chants are next, as Eddy pokes Kenzo in the eye. Kenzo gets an Irish whip and a clothesline in the corner on Guerrero and stomps him down to some massive boos. Guerrero comes back with a few punches, but an Irish whip is reversed and the crowd boos another clothesline from Suzuki. He chokes Guerrero on the mat and gets the jumping knee drop for two. Into a nerve hold/chinlock and Kenzo throws Eddy back to the mat when he tries to stand. Suzuki puts the hold back in as the crowd cheers Eddy on, and Guerrero elbows out. He gets a slew of punches and one more knocks down the Bronze Warrior, and an Irish whip leads to a back body drop. Three Amigos leads to Eddy climbing to the top, but Kenzo takes his feet from under him before he can get the Frog Splash. Eddy headbutts Kenzo off the top and comes off with the Frog Splash for real this time for the win.

Eddy Guerrero def. Kenzo Suzuki via Pinfall – 3:57

Backstage, Kurt Angle claims that he will make Rey Mysterio tap and insults Jindrak for not softening Mysterio up last week. He thanks them, however, for getting him straight into the finals by eliminating both the Undertaker and Dupree. Luther Reigns is annoyed by everybody being afraid of the Undertaker, then goes into his spiel about having his throat slit and how he spent “5 calendars” in jail. He has stared death in the face, so he ain’t scared of no Dead Man. Tonight, Jindrak & Reigns challenge The Bashams for the Tag Team Championship.

=COMMERCIAL=

The Lectric Shave of the Night (or something) is Luther Reigns causing Undertaker to be counted out, leading to a double count out finish for his match against Rene Dupree last week.

WWE Tag Team Championship
Challengers Mark Jindrak & Luther Reigns vs. Champions The Bashams

Doug starts the match off with Jindrak. They lock up and Mark backs him into the corner, but Basham pushes him off. Jindrak slaps him do Doug tackles him down. Reigns gets a knee to the back allowing Jindrak to get a big left hand and a tag out to Luther. Reigns whips Doug into the corner and pounds him down, then whips him hard into the opposite corner. He does the same one more time before a tag out to Jindrak. Vertical suplex and Jindrak kips up and hits a pair of elbows, then stops to gyrate and misses a third. He gets another tag to Reigns who comes in and gets a butterfly suplex for 2 before Danny breaks up the count. Jindrak disposes of Danny, and the challengers go for a double team, but the lights go out and the gong hits. When the lights go back on, Undertaker is standing in the ring. Reigns pushes Jindrak at him and gets out of the ring as ‘Taker gets Snake Eyes, the big boot and a choke slam to finish off Jindrak. The Dead Man’s music hits and he stares down Reigns.

No contest via Undertaker interference – 2:42 (When lights came back on)

=COMMERCIAL=

WWE fans in Japan thank WWE for coming.

Joy is in the ring with the t-shirt gun. She does it WAY better than Christy does.

Kenzo is backstage with Hiroko, and she is ready for her Kimono match tonight. She is ready to strip Torrie, and Kenzo smiles as his wife describes the situation. She doesn’t like that, but he smiles again when she leaves.

JBL is speaking with Amy about the things he’s gone through as Champion, and he fears he might not make it out of the match next Sunday. He then pulls out the tranq gun that Kurt Angle used on the Big Show months ago, and his time it’s even stronger. He gives it to Amy, but she accidentally pulls the trigger and shoots him in the neck. He’s not in good condition after that.

=COMMERCIAL=

In the back, Torrie is preparing for the Kimono match later tonight.

Sumo legend Akebono is once again at ringside.

WWE Cruiserweight Championship
Champion Funaki vs. Challenger Chavo Guerrero

The crowd chants for Funaki and the men lock up. Chavo gets an armdrag and tries to start a “Chavo!” chant to no avail. They slap hands and lock up again, and Chavo goes behind and gets a pair of headlock takedowns, and Funaki gets a legsweep and goes for a cover but gets nothing. They have a standoff as the crowd cheers, and Funaki goes to shake Chavo’s hand, but Guerrero clotheslines him down and kicks him a couple times, but only gets a two count. A European uppercut takes Funaki down and a backdrop suplex gets 2 for Chavo. Chinlock by Chavo, but Funaki gets out but runs into a knee to the stomach for 2. Another European uppercut gets another near fall, and Funaki tries to battle back before Chavo hammers him down. Irish whip from one corner to the other takes Funaki down, and Guerrero does into an Octopus stretch. The crowd cheers Funaki out, and Chavo goes for a sunset flip. Funaki rolls out and gets a front dropkick to the face, and Funaki gains control. He punches Guerrero and comes off the ropes with a flying forearm and follows it up with a back body drop, then gets a bulldog for a 2 count. The champ goes for a monkey flip out of the corner, but Chavo reverses and sits Funaki on the top rope, then counters the Tornado DDT only to get an enziguri for his trouble. That gets a 2 count and Chavo intercepts Funaki on the top rope and nails a huge superplex, and both men are down. Chavo gets a cover, but it only gets him a 2 count. Funaki misses a punch and Chavo gets a backbreaker, but it only gets another near fall. Guerrero goes for another superplex, but Funaki throws him off and comes back with the Tornado DDT to get the pinfall victory.

Funaki def. Chavo Guerrero via Pinfall to retain the Cruiserweight Championship – 7:52

Carlito is backstage, and he’s glad that the GM isn’t around. He thinks that next week Teddy Long will be no more, and that’s cool. JBL walks over and comments on CCC’s hair and says it looks like a Chia Pet, and when Orlando finds him, he says he was talking to the raccoon head, and wishes his Chief of Staff luck in beating “that Vanilla Ice rapper guy”. Jordan tells him not to go anywhere as JBL channels Rain Man. He spots a blow up Godzilla and asks what it’s looking at, then hits it with his hat. Funny stuff.

=COMMERCIAL=

Chris Jericho, Chris Benoit, Christian and Stacy Keibler spoof the leg spread scene from Basic Instinct. HILARIOUSLY.

#1 Contender’s Tournament (Quarterfinal)
John Cena vs. Orlando Jordan

They lock up to start and OJ elbows him down and backs Cena into the corner. He gets some shoulder blocks and an elbow, then chokes him on the rope, but Cena reverses an Irish whip and gets a hip toss, and a Fisherman’s Suplex gets him 2. Irish whip into the corner and Cena unloads on Jordan with a slew of back elbows, and Cena whips him into the opposite corner. Jordan gets a boot in to block a charge and comes out of the corner with a clothesline. He gets the Johnson Shuffle, and a pair of elbows gets him a 2 count. Cena is up, but Jordan reverses a whip and gets a powerslam for another near fall. He goes into a chinlock on the US Champ, and he stops John from getting out with a backdrop suplex, but Cena kicks out at 2. Swinging neckbreaker and Jordan gets yet another 2 count before Cena gets his shoulder up. Irish whip and Orlando elbows Cena down for one more 2. Cena battles back with an elbow, a forearm, a headbutt and a clothesline. He gets an elbow on a charging Jordan and comes off the ropes with a flying shoulder block. Protobomb leads to the 5 Knuckle Shuffle, and the crowd appreciates it. He pumps up the shoes and finishes it with the FU to advance to the semifinals.

John Cena def. Orlando Jordan via Pinfall – 4:52

Later tonight, Angle faces Mysterio with a chance to advance to the tournament finals, and next, Hiroko and Torrie Wilson have a Kimono match.

=COMMERCIAL=

Orlando Jordan is backstage, and JBL is nowhere to be found. He and the rest of the Cabinet are frantic to find him.

Kimono Match
Torrie Wilson vs. Hiroko

Torrie goes for a handshake, but Hiroko refuses and throws salt in her eyes. She slaps Torrie down and chokes her on the ropes. Torrie blocks a kick and clotheslines Hiroko down, and Hiroko bails. Torrie gets a baseball slide and tosses Hiroko back into the ring, and Hiroko tries to take off Torrie’s kimono. Torrie chops Hiroko in the corner and Hiroko comes out screaming, so Torrie pokes her in the eye. She gets an airplane spin, then takes off Hiroko’s kimono for the win.

Torrie Wilson def. Hiroko via Disrobing – 1:41

Post match, Hiroko runs off screaming and Torrie takes her kimono off anyway. As she exits, JBL is walking out of the entrance holding the Godzilla blowup and he tries to throw it in the ring, but fails and goes down with it.

=COMMERCIAL=

Back in the ring, JBL is cutting a promo on Godzilla, and goes off onto a tangent about the Japanese eating noodles on a subway. He says Big Show is a dinosaur, and his name is Barney. He says JBL stands for “Just Beats a Lizard”. He says Show weighs 490,000 pounds, and keeps saying that “he eats pizza”. He takes off his shirt and slaps Godzilla in the faces, then challenges him to a fight. He slaps him with the hat again, then takes off his pants to reveal a pair of pink boxers, and then the Big Show’s music hits, and the Champ looks terrified. Big Show enters the ring and JBL falls on his ass, then says he’ll let the two dinosaurs talk, then pulls his pants back up and stumbles to the other side of the ring. He then comes to and punches the Big Show and nails the Clothesline from Hell, then starts beating Show with his boot. He calls out Orlando and The Bashams, and they have a chair, but Big Show moves and takes out the whole Cabinet, getting a double choke slam on the Bashams and one more for the Chief of Staff on his own.

=COMMERCIAL=

During the break, the Big Show says that JBL will be trapped with a 7 foot tall, 500 pound giant in the steel cage next Sunday. He can flip cars over, crack a human skull with his bare hands, and he can break JBL’s ribs like nothing. He then says that there’s only one man in Japan who can relate to being a giant, and that’s Akebono. He’s Japan’s equivalent to the Big Show. He invites him into the ring, and the two men stand nearly eye to eye. Show offers his hand, and Akebono shakes it to a huge ovation.

The theme song for No Way Out is Fozzy’s “Enemy”.

No Way Out Card
– JBL vs. The Big Show (Barbed Wire Steel Cage, WWE Championship)
– The Undertaker vs. Luther Reigns

Next week, Booker T faces John Cena in the sole semifinal match of the number one contendership tournament. I wonder why it isn’t scheduled to be held at No Way Out any longer? Damn, I hope they have something big planned for the PPV, then, because this leaves only 3 matches set, meaning they’ll have to make at least 4 next week. If they just put Cena vs. Booker on PPV, they’d have 4 matches set for the show, and a better storyline for Cena overcoming taking on a fresh opponent after already having had a match to boot. Oh well.

Backstage, Kurt calls Rey a “little jumping bean”, and Mysterio isn’t happy about that. He says he’ll be the one laughing when he beats Kurt in tonight’s main event.

=COMMERCIAL=

WrestleMania Goes Hollywood in 52 days.

The SmackDown! stars are glad to be in Japan, and the fans are happy to see them.

#1 Contender’s Tournament (Quarterfinal)
Kurt Angle vs. Rey Mysterio

They lock up and Angle takes him down, but they’re in the ropes. Another lockup and Kurt grabs an arm and takes Rey to the mat, putting his knee in Rey’s arm. He puts Mysterio on his back, but only gets 1. Rey elbows out and the crowd applauds in respect. Kurt shoots in and gets behind Mysterio, and Rey gets an arm wringer, but Angle gets his own, then a shoulder block. Rey leapfrogs him then goes underneath, and gets some punches, but then Angle catches him with a knee coming off the ropes. Rey leads in with a kick and gets a side headlock, and Angle shoots him off the ropes, but Rey gets a tilt-a-whirl head scissors, but Angle is able to dodge the 619 after a drop toehold. Another lockup and a headlock takedown get one for Kurt, then he rolls Rey to his back for one more. Rey stands and shoots Kurt into the ropes, but he catches Rey with a shoulder block and gets another side headlock takedown. Rey stands again and gets some knees before he shoots Angle off, and Kurt gets another shoulder block, but Rey gets two after rolling through a sunset flip and a front dropkick to the face. Rey climbs the ropes and gets the 10 punch on Angle, but Kurt whips him into the opposite corner and catches him with an overhead belly to belly suplex.

=COMMERCIAL=

In the ring Kurt is in control with a chinlock with body scissors with his legs around Mysterio. Rey gets out and Angle whips him to the ropes, but Rey holds on, and when Kurt charges he low bridges Kurt, who flies out to the floor. Rey climbs to the top turnbuckle and comes down with a flying crossbody to the outside, and they both get back in the ring. Kurt gets a release German suplex out of the corner after Rey misses a charge following an Irish whip, and a backbreaker gets 3 near falls for the Olympic Hero. The crowd boos as Angle chokes Rey on the bottom rope with his foot, then stomps on him and gets a pair of shoulder blocks to Mysterio’s back in the corner. That leads to a backdrop suplex, but Rey kicks out at two. Rey tries to fight back with a kick, but Kurt holds him down and gets some well-placed knees to the high-flyer’s lower back and gets a rear chinlock. Rey elbows out and comes off the ropes, but Kurt catches him and takes him down, rolling Rey to his back three times for 2 counts. He holds Rey down with a gut wrench, but Rey stands and gets elbows, however Kurt clubs him and whips him into the corner. Rey jumps to the second rope and goes for a moonsault, but Kurt catches him and places Rey into a Tree of Woe in the opposite corner and gets some more shoulder blocks, but misses a big one when Rey moves as Angle charges from the opposite corner. Kurt is out of the ring, and Rey runs out with a baseball slide into a leg scissors, and the referee gets to a 9 count before Rey comes back in with a springboard seated senton, and Rey counters a tilt-a-whirl slam with a cross body and gets two, then gets a spinning DDT on Kurt, but he only gets two. Dropkick to Angle’s back leads to a 619 attempt, but Kurt catches him and locks in the Ankle Lock, but Rey counters out and ties a school boy, but it only gets 2. Kurt comes back with a clothesline and they’re both down. Angle gets a single German before Rey counters it and finally gets that elusive 619, and Rey springboards off the ropes, but Kurt catches him and goes for the Angle Slam, but Rey counters out with an armdrag. Hurricanrana gets a very close 2 count for Mysterio, and Kurt throws Rey to the top and he comes off with a victory roll, but Kurt kicks out. Rey gets a springboard crossbody for another near fall, and Kurt reverses an Irish whip, and Rey goes for a bulldog, but Kurt blocks it and gets the Angle Slam, which he follows with the Ankle Lock to finally get Rey to tap out.

Kurt Angle def. Rey Mysterio via Submission – 20:00

The show comes to a conclusion with Kurt Angle celebrating in the ring. He gets the winner of next week’s John Cena versus Booker T tournament semifinal at No Way Out in the finals of the number one contendership tournament.