wrestling / TV Reports
411’s WWE Velocity Report: 5.27.06
Let me start off by saying that I’m sorry for my absence. There’s really no good excuse, but I am back. Wild few weeks, too- OJ lost the Velocity title to Matt Hardy, then went and got released. In non-Velocity action, Judgment Day was actually quite good.
Gunner Scott versus Lawrence Tyler
Lockup, and Gunner rolls Tyler over. Another lockup, and Tyler grabs a hammerlock. Scott reverses, then holds it as Tyler tries to escape. Tyler reverses again, but Scott sweeps him down. He backs Tyler into the corner and stomps a mudhole, then flings him out by the head. He follows up with a clothesline for two. Scott nails a dropkick for two. Tyler dodges a corner charge and suplexes Scott for two. Scott gets up and gets a Russian Legsweep for two. Tyler scores a kick, then a clothesline. He applies a rear top wristlock, but Gunner Scott gets up. Tyler tosses him down and goes back to the hold. Scott gets up and nails an overhead belly to belly, then a few running forearms. Belly to back suplex follows, and Scott hits a sweet release German Suplex for two. DDT follows and finishes.
Winner: Gunner Scott
Match Time: 4:54
Rating: **1/2
Commentary: Paint by numbers, but Scott looked good. He needs a new finisher, though, and could stand a shave so he doesn’t look like Eugene redux.
Gregory Helms versus Shawn Osborne
Lockup, and Helms throws Osborne to the ropes. Circling, another lockup, and Helms grabs a headlock. Whip, but Osborne comes back with a shoulder. Osborne grabs a wristlock and whips Helms to the corner, but Helms elbows a charge and nails a dropkick from the second rope. Helms chokes Osborne on the bottom rope, then kicks him in the corner. Helms hits some knee shots, then grabs a front underhook armlock. He nails Osborne with more knees, then punches him in the corner. Helms nails a suplex. Osborne counters a double axe handle with a gut punch, then slugs Helms down. Helms takes control with a modified spinning neckbreaker, then gets the Nightmare on Helms Street (I didn’t know they went back to that name) for the win.
Winner: Gregory Helms
Match Time: 3:39
Rating: **1/4
Commentary: Not much happening, but Helms has been a pleasure to watch since returning to Smackdown.
On Smackdown, Rey beat JBL to drive him off of Smackdown. Catch you on the flip side.
Kid Kash and Jamie Noble versus Funaki and Scotty 2 Hotty
Kash and Noble are not only wearing the dog collars, but they also do the old Steiner Brothers pose (with Noble as Rick). The heels attack the faces to start, with Noble tossing Scotty out of the ring. Double whip on Funaki, who grabs the ropes, kicks Kash, and bulldogs Noble. He gets an armbar on Noble, and things settle. Noble gets an arm whip, then goes back to the bar. Tag to Scotty, who kicks Noble in the arm and grabs a wristlock. Noble reverses and barks at Scotty. Scotty rolls out and grabs his own wristlock again. Noble shoots Scotty to the ropes and hits a forearm as he returns. Noble tags Kash, who runs in. Scotty gets a pair of hiptosses, then a Japanese Armdrag. Scotty locks the arm, but Kash pushes him into the corner. Kash hits punches and headbutts, but Scotty fights out with punches. Scotty gets a mounted punch series, then jumps off with a double axe handle on Noble. Kash flings him down and covers for one, then hits a couple of headbutts and back rakes. He slams Scotty’s head to Noble’s boot, then tags Noble. Noble gets a bodyslam, then barks and covers for two. Noble grabs a chinlock, but releases it to nail Funaki. The heels double team Scotty as the referee is distracted with Funaki. Scotty fights back and tries to tag Funaki, but Noble pulls him back and tags Kid Kash. Noble gets a Spinal Tap, then applies a head and arm lock. He switches up into an armbar, then tags Noble. Double whip, and the heels hit a double forearm shot for two. Scotty reverses a suplex into a rollup for two, but Noble clotheslines him down for a two count of his own. Noble applies a cravat hold. Scotty elbows out, but still can’t reach Funaki. Scotty reverses a Piledriver into a backdrop, then tags Funaki. He comes in with a crossbody on Noble, then hits an enziguri on Kash. He goes up top and gets another crossbody on Noble for two. Scotty tosses Kash out, but Noble catches him in the double knee gutbuster. Funaki rolls Noble up for two. Funaki kicks Noble in the gut, then sets him up for the Rising Sun. Noble flings him off and gets a low dropkick. He lifts Funaki up for a powerbomb, and Kash comes off the top with a clothesline. The clothesline/powerbomb finishes for the heels.
Winners: Kid Kash and Jamie Noble.
Match Time: 9:32
Rating: ***
Match Time: A little one dimensional with all of the face in peril stuff, but solid all around. Still, I’d rather see the Mexicools get a shot and London and Kendrick next.
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