wrestling / Video Reviews
CHIKARA ‘Deep Breath’ and ‘A Good Man Goes To War’ Reviews
Loading...Chicago, IL – 10.28.2017
Championship Rundown
Grand Champion: Juan Francisco de Coronado
Campeones de Parejas: El Hijo del Ice Cream & Ice Cream Jr.
Young Lions Cup Champion: Ophidian
Commentary is provided by Mike Quackenbush.
Travis Huckabee vs. Everett Connors
Connors of course has the Bieber cardboard cutout with him and Connors has him propped up in the corner. He fears Huckabee will mess with him, so Connors moves Bieber to the floor. They exchange holds until Huckabee backslides Connors for two. Huckabee grabs a hammerlock out of double knuckle lock. Connors grabs the ropes. He fails to get a backslide of his own, and Huckabee mule kicks him in the lower back. Huckabee ducks under a leapfrog and goes to the floor, coming back in with Bieber in hand. Huckabee tosses Bieber into Connors’ arms, then trips him and counts a two count for Bieber. Both men make sure not to collide with Bieber in the corner as they exchange back elbows. Connors kicks out Huckabee’s leg before delivering a superkick for two. He goes for a short piledriver using the ropes, but Huckabee counters with a sunset flip. He goes for the swinging Stretch Muffler but Connors kicks him away. Huckabee headbutts Connors in the sternum for two. Connors backs Huckabee to the corner to avoid the butterfly suplex. Connors catches him with an enzuigiri before swinging out of the corner with a DDT for two. Despite Connors rocking Huckabee with two hard forearms, Huckabee is able to lay him out with a Jon Woo dropkick. Connors once again escapes the swinging Stretch Muffler. He snaps Huckabee’s torso on the middle rope, then hits the short piledriver using the middle ropes. Huckabee finds the strength to kick out. Connors goes for a superkick. Huckabee catches his leg and swings him around in the Stretch Muffle! Grabbing Bieber does Connors no good, as Huckabee releases and puts on the Cycling Stretch Muffler for the submission victory at 8:41. This was a fun match with some smart wrestling. They built up Huckabee’s submission all match long and it paid off. They blended in the right amount of humor with the action and let Huckabee show a little more personality than usual. Perfectly executed. **¾
The Carnies (Nick Iggy & Kerry Awful) vs. Sonny Defarge & Cornelius Crummels
Crummels offers one dollar to Iggy to lay down. A fan counters with five dollars, which Iggy accepts. Iggy lays down, but then rolls to the floor as Crummels goes to pin him. Awful sneaks in from behind with a schoolboy for two. Crummels shoulder blocks do not budge Awful. Awful changes direction on Crummels to mow him down with his own shoulder block. He side Russian leg sweeps Crummels into multiple pinning attempts. An angry Defarge tags in to face Iggy. They argue over who is larger, leading to the fans requesting Bryce to flex, which he happily obliges. When Defarge flexes, Iggy snaps his suspenders into his back. Defarge uses his diseased hand to switch a side headlock and shoulder block Iggy. Iggy catches Defarge with a monkey flip and trips him into a double fish hook. Defarge pulls his hands out of his mouth and throws him forward. Defarge sticks his right finger into his ear before putting it in Iggy’s mouth. Awful rubs his armpit before putting his nose over Defarge’s nose. Crummels sneezes in his hand before grabbing Awful’s beard. The chain is broken, and Crummels ends up taking the Car-Knees for two. Crummels sneezes in Iggy’s face. Defarge distracts him so Crummels can dropkick him from behind. A slingshot from Crummels into a neck snap across the top rope from Defarge turns the match into the former Campeones favor. Iggy eventually escapes their double team tactics by rolling under a clothesline from Defarge and tagging in Awful. Awful has a violence party on Defarge after knocking Crummels off the apron. Awful unravels Defarge into a lariat for two. He sends Crummels to the floor before hitting the Earthquake Splash. Crummels jumps back in the ring to break the pin. Awful weaves underneath a double clothesline and sends Crummels and Defarge crashing into each other. The Carnies hit the IOU-1 Driver on Crummels for two. They set up for the Carnie Stomp. Crummels sweeps out Iggy’s leg to stop him. An uppercut/leg sweep combo from Crummels and Defarge on Awful earn them a two count. They deliver Great Expectations onto Awful, but Iggy intercepts the pin just in time. All four men fight until the Carnies hook up Crummels and Defarge for the Force Destroyer! Both of them roll outside to avoid a pin from the Carnies. They follow outside where Crummels sends Awful face first into a ring post. Iggy fights Crummels and Defarge off on his own in the ring valiantly, but ends up getting clobbered by a rolling lariat from Defarge. The super monkey flip sends Iggy across the ring. Crummels follows up with The Best of Times off the second rope onto Iggy for the pin at 13:25 while Defarge stops Awful from breaking it up. The Carnies had one of the best outsider debuts in CHIKARA in a long while, if not one of the best ever. They established their characters, won the crowd over, and had a really exciting match with the former Campeones. The crowd seemed genuinely crestfallen when they lost. It would be absolutely insane for CHIKARA to not use them again, and major kudos are deserved to Crummels and Defarge who were picture perfect opponents from both a character and style perspective. ***¼
Space Monkey vs. Jeremy Leary
Monkey is dressed up as Donkey Kong for Halloween. Leary doesn’t appreciate Monkey picking at his hair. Monkey low bridges Leary to the floor and fakes him out with a teased dive. Back inside, Monkey eats part of a banana before delivering a Frankensteiner and a moonsault block. Leary rolls back outside. Leary blocks a penalty kick. Monkey however cartwheels off the apron. Leary stops his monkey flip, places him in the front row, and delivers a superkick. He slams Monkey on the apron and hits a tiger feint kick. In the ring, Leary delivers a running corner punch and a diving uppercut. He yanks Monkey’s Donkey Kong costume off to the crowd’s dismay. Leary hooks Monkey with his own arm before driving him into the canvas. Monkey reverses a whip to the corner. Monkey cartwheel kicks Leary from the apron. Leary however trips Monkey when Monkey attempts a springboard attack. After a few elbows to the chest, Leary stops a recovering Monkey with a powerslam for two. Leary continues his attack until Monkey stops him with a corner splash. Leary responds with a forearm in the corner, so Monkey hurls himself with a cannonball senton in the opposite corner. Leary pokes Monkey in the eyes and drops him with an Ace Crusher Codebreaker for a nearfall. Monkey climbs Leary’s shoulders as Leary is gloating and elbows him to the head. Monkey follows him to the floor with a tope con hilo. Leary rolls to the other side of the ring, and this time Monkey follows with another tope con hilo. He hits the Monkey-Go-Round back in the ring for two. Leary halts a slingshot from Monkey and hangs him up in the ropes. He drills him with the Fever Dream (a spike Complete Shot), but Monkey’s tail is on the ropes which breaks the count! Monkey recovers with a Michinoku Driver for two. Monkey goes to the top rope. He shoves the referee into the ropes to crotch Monkey on the top turnbuckle. Leary brings him down with the Tower of London, but Monkey gets his shoulder up right before the three count. Leary calls out Lucas Calhoun as he twists up both of Monkey’s wrists and fingers. He catapults up into a Complete Shot for two. Monkey hits a desperation high kick to buy some time. He gets in some strikes, but Leary stops him with a double thrust to the throat. Leary charges but gets monkey flipped into the corner. Monkey hits a moonsault senton for two. Leary ducks a tail whip and goes to the eyes. He sends Monkey head first into the middle turnbuckle before delivering a knee trembler for the win at 16:17. This was certainly my favorite Leary performance to date. He’s added some unique and impactful offense to his arsenal while keeping his focus on Monkey’s head and neck the entirety of the bout. The CHIKAGO crowd loving Space Monkey and him performing as well as he always does helped too. I do think this was a bit long, but otherwise found myself pleasantly surprised. ***
Missile Assault Man vs. Merlok
Merlok shoves Missile across the ring out of a lock-up. Missile grabs his left leg, but Merlok Beele’s him away. Missile heel picks Merlok while grabbing a waistlock, but Merlok escapes and shoulder blocks him down. Missile tripes Merlok and rolls forward into a crossface. Merlok picks him up into a side slam. Merlok charges him in the corner. Missile jumps over and rolls him up for two. Merlok turns Missile inside out with a lariat. Missile is able to sneak in some uppercuts once off the mat. Merlok catches him in mid-air and drives him down to the canvas for two. Merlok does more damage to Missile’s neck and back. Merlok calls for the Spike, but Missile stops him by jamming Merlok’s neck on the top rope. Missile quickly ascends the rope, but Merlok pulls him down. Missile is able to hit a pump kick, but Merlok shuts him down with a superkick and corner splash. Missile tries to get momentum going with forearm strikes, but Merlok shuts him down with a Doctor Bomb. Missile kicks Merlok in the side of the head from the mat. Merlok forearms Missile across the shoulders and chokes him on the middle rope in response. Missile goes to the floor where Merlok drives him back first into the apron. Missile tags Merlok with forearms and uppercuts. Merlok charges at him, but Missile moves and Merlok crashes into the ring post. Missile baseball slide dropkicks Merlok before suicide diving after him. Unfortunately for Missile, Merlok catches him and throws him overhead out of a belly-to-belly suplex! Missile army crawls back to ringside and gets in the ring just before the twenty count. Merlok stomps on his back repeatedly before whipping him forcefully into the corner. Bryce checks on Missile after Melok does more damage to the ribs. Missile beckons Merlok who is more than happy to oblige. He forearms Missile, crushes him in the corner, and then picks him up for the World’s Strongest Slam. Missile grabs an arm and brings Merlok down into a cross armbreaker! Merlok with one-arm muscles up Missile into a sit-out powerbomb. Missile kicks out of the pin. He throws uppercuts until Merlok cuts him off and delivers a headbutt. Missile escapes the Emerald Flowsion but can’t get Merlok up onto his own shoulders. Merlok scoops him up onto the top turnbuckle. Missile elbows his way out and comes off the top with a diving uppercut. He lands a series of running uppercuts to Merlok in the corner. The damage allows him to muscle up Merlok for the rolling Death Valley Driver. When Merlok kicks out, Missile applies the crossface. Merlok fights his way into a position where he can pick up Missile and drop him with the Emerald Flowsion for the pin at 15:57. You could see the shift in the match where Missile was finally able to get some momentum going against Merlok and it looked like he would do what very few have done before him in best Merlok. It took literally everything Merlok had left to best Missile, all but collapsing after hitting his finisher. I loved the story, I loved how good Missile looked here, and I think both competitors came out of this one for the better. ***¼
Oleg the Usurper & Kobald vs. “The Osirian Portal” (“Ophidian” & “Amasis”)
Much like The Whisper has become the new Ophidian, a new Amasis has taken place of the previous Amasis who had his mask removed at “Temple of Doom” and has not been seen since.
Oleg begins this match on his own, attacking Oleg before Kobald enters and before the bell rings. He gets a two count early with a rolling senton onto Ophidian. Kobald makes his entrance as Oleg has Ophidian in a chinlock. Amasis interrupts Oleg with a dropkick. The Portal get in some shots before Oleg ducks their double clothesline and nails them both down. Oleg decides not to tag in Kobald, but Kobald does it himself when Ophidian dropkicks Oleg towards him. Kobald is able to take Ophidian down with a running seated senton. Oleg boots down both members of the Portal when they look to double team Kobald. They send the Portal outside. Kobald offers Oleg a handshake. Before Oleg can accept, the Portal re-enter the ring and attack. Ophidian holds Oleg while he and Amasis deliver an enzuigiri/superkick combo. The Portal give Kobald the Slave Initiation. The Portal continue to double team Kobald until the Pyramid plex goes awry. Kobald hits a Doomsday Device on Ophidian, causing Ophidian to spike Amasis with a poisonrana! Oleg tags in. He picks up speed off the ropes before splashing Ophidian and Amasis in opposite corners. He double chokeslams the Portal for two. Kobald tries to introduce a foreign object which Oleg objects. Kobald is turned around by Oleg and accidentally strikes him with the object! Feeling guilt, Kobald runs away. This leaves Oleg susceptible for the Osirian Sacrament, giving this iteration of the Portal the win at 10:04. The Portal didn’t look terribly crisp in some of their tandem offense, which given they’re a bootleg of the original team actually kind of works. Oleg had a fun, dominant performance and the fact that he almost shook Kobald’s hand shows he’s willing to get down to business even if he doesn’t agree with the partnership. I enjoyed the match and thought it accomplished what it needed to. **½
Dasher Hatfield vs. Moose
Moose backs Hatfield to the corner but does not strike. Hatfield does the same, even offering a handshake, which Moose accepts. Hatfield’s own shoulder block makes himself fall and barely budges Moose. Hatfield invites Moose to try it himself. He tries to armdrag Moose, who resists and sends Hatfield to the ropes. Hatfield is able to give Moose a “good game” smack to the behind before pulling off a casadora armdrag. He overhand chops Moose before running the ropes into an armdrag. Moose goozles Hatfield and places him on the top rope, then dropkicks Hatfield to the floor! Moose’s chops hit so hard the fans wince when they connect. Moose insults Hatfield by “rounding the bases” before booting Hatfield in a front row seat. He rounds the bases again, but this time Hatfield cuts him off with a forearm shot. Hatfield charges, only to get popped up into a powerbomb onto the ring apron! Moose sends Hatfield back in the ring. Hatfield comes right back out with a suicide dive, then a second. Moose ducks a third, but Hatfield catches him off guard with a moonsault block off the apron! Hatfield chops Moose as he is seated, then cracks him with a sliding boot. Back in the ring, Moose refuses to back down from Hatfield’s forearm shots. Hatfield goes for another boot. Moose catches hit, hits his own pump kick, then splashes, hip attacks, and dropkicks Hatfield in the corner. Hatfield gets his boot up to prevent a corner attack. Moose pulls him down into a Rydeen Bomb for two. Moose goes for another hip attack. Hatfield catches Moose by the waist and German suplexes him. He kicks out Moose’s leg when Moose tries to charge again. He baseball slides dropkicks Moose in the corner for two. Hatfield weaves Moose into an abdominal stretch attempt. It takes a lot of effort, but he gets it applied. Moose hip tosses his way free. Hatfield ducks two discuss lariats and nails Moose with a lariat of his own for two. Both competitors unload with chops. Moose goes for the Game Changer but Hatfield superkicks to block. The two men clash heads, knocking them both down. Both men get to their feet. Moose bicycle kicks Hatfield and nails the Hitstick for a close nearfall. Moose charges again. Hatfield uses his momentum to armdrag Moose into the corner. Hatfield hits the Jackhammer for two! He tries it again. Moose pump kicks Hatfield instead, pops up Hatfield into a powerbomb, and lands a senton splash for an incredibly close nearfall. Moose goes for the Game Changer. Hatfield ducks and rolls him up for two. Moose pump kicks Hatfield once more. Hatfield pops him up into a sit-out powerbomb. The second Jackhammer gets Hatfield the pin at 16:42. This was like Merlok vs. Missile Assault Man but better. Hatfield and Moose beat the crap out each other. Moose showed his strategy through his repetitive offense and Hatfield was able to get Moose where he needed him to be because of it. Hatfield has now bested Merlok (the only person to do so), Moose, and has Keith Lee on the horizon. Hatfield went from being a guy who couldn’t win a match to getting his mojo back on the path to the Grand Championship. This is a match that exceeded my expectations (mostly because I had not seen a Moose match in years) and capped off a great show. ***¾
Chicago, IL – 10.28.2017
Championship Rundown
Grand Champion: Juan Francisco de Coronado
Campeones de Parejas: El Hijo del Ice Cream & Ice Cream Jr.
Young Lions Cup Champion: Ophidian
Commentary is provided by Mike Quackenbush.
“Mr. Touchdown” Mark Angelosetti vs. The Proletariat Boar of Moldova
Both men shove each other after an intense face-to-face confrontation. Their lock-up is just as aggressive, and sees Angelosetti hold onto a side headlock. Boar slams Angelosetti out of it, but misses the follow up elbow. Angelosetti drives Boar into the corner for several shoulder blocks. Angelosetti uses a courting hold to mare Boar into a Magistral cradle for two. Angelosetti takes Boar down with a one-footed dropkick before re-applying the side headlock. Boar catches his crossbody attempt and throws him out of a fallaway slam. He throws Angelosetti to the floor where he does some more damage. Angelosetti is able to throw Boar into the apron. He tries to rebound off the ropes for a DDT, but Boar resists and drops Angelosetti with a Gourdbuster on the apron instead. Angelosetti uses a chin breaker to break Boar’s chinlock, but Boar reapplies it almost immediately. He does break free with another, only for Boar to catch him with a spinning side slam. He mows Angelosetti down with a big boot for two. Angelosetti gets in a flurry of offense. He fails to scoop Boar up. Boar knee lifts Angelosetti in the corner, but in the opposite corner. Angelosetti palm strikes him. Angelosetti uses a reverse leapfrog to avoid Boar’s charge and drops him with a spinebuster for two. Angelosetti places Boar on the top rope and brings him down with a superplex for two. They go to the apron where Angelosetti gets Boar down to a knee. He snaps the middle rope into Boar’s back which takes him to the floor. Boar sneaks in when Angelosetti is poised to dive and gives him the Gore for the pin and his third point at 9:28. Angelosetti getting his third point over Coronado’s career rival was a nice touch, and the two of them produced an excellent, hard hitting bout. I am very interested to see the dynamic of Coronado and Boar as opponents. ***
Solo Darling vs. Hallowicked
Darling kicks away at Hallowicked’s leg. Hallowicked pushes her away but Darling is persistent. She goes for the Sharp Stinger early but he forces Darling away. More kicks to the leg lead to a second attempt. Hallowicked goes to the apron and tags Darling with a forearm when she comes near. He places her on the top turnbuckle. Darling blocks the super snapmare and comes off the top with a bulldog for two. Hallowicked yakuza kicks her after she goes for the Sharp Stinger a third time unsuccessfully. He picks her up into two successive backbreakers, then stretches her out across his knee. Hallowicked drops Darling throat first across the top rope out of a powerbomb position. She kicks at Hallowicked’s leg from the apron. He picks her up into Go 2 Sleepy Hollow for two. Now on her feet, Darling kicks away at Hallowicked’s left leg to the crowds delight. Hallowicked blasts her with one forearm to halt her. Darling tries to swing off the ropes with a swinging Frankensteiner. Hallowicked stops her, but Darling headbutts her way out of his arms. She side steps a step-up enzuigiri. Darling headbutts Hallowicked’s leg before bringing him down with two dragonscrew leg whips. She applies the Sharp Stinger, but has to release due to his long legs after he shifts his hips. Hallowicked kicks her in the back when she tries a hip attack. He successfully lands the step-up enzuigiri and sets her up for a super fisherman’s buster. Darling tries to counter with a sunset bomb. Hallowicked holds onto the top rope and pummels her head, but even still she brings him down with a big powerbomb! When she comes to, she goes for the Sharp Stinger. Hallowicked however kicks her in the side of the head and snatches her up into a spiral bomb for the win at 9:13. Darling had a very sound strategy, worked it as best she could, but Hallowicked caught her in the exact moment he needed to turn things around and secure the win. Darling “hanging” with the only two time Grand Champ does wonders for her credibility as a competitor and won her further admiration from the Chicago crowd. Another great bout. ***¼
Hype Rockwell vs. Race Jaxon
Jaxon hides behind referee Bryce Remsburg at the bell. When Rockwell approaches, he takes solace in the ropes. Jaxon gets in a step-up knee in the corner. Rockwell shoves him away and knocks Jaxon down with a shoulder block. Jaxon decides to leave the ringside area. Bryce is at the count of eighteen when Rockwell asks for him to hold up the count so he can go find him. Rockwell finds him up in the balcony and pummels him back down the stairs and into the auditorium. He throws Jaxon into the ring, only for Jaxon to come at him with a dropkick through the ropes. Rockwell catches his pecado attempt. He goes for a lawn dart. Jaxon slides off, sends Rockwell into the ring post, then dropkicks Rockwell into the post. Jaxon continues with the dropkicks back inside the ring. Jaxon’s double axe handles do some damage but don’t keep Rockwell off his legs for very long. Rockwell cuts him off the third time with a punch to the stomach. He scoops Jaxon up into a Michinoku Driver. Rockwell calls for the Hyper Wheel, but Jaxon boots him in the face to counter. Rockwell pulls up Jaxon into a powerslam. He goes for the Hyper Wheel again. Jaxon’s elbows do not relent Rockwell, so Jaxon decides to pull Bryce into Rockwell to break the hold. Jaxon goes through his through the ropes clothesline. Rockwell catches him and lands a brainbuster for two. Jaxon gets in a superkick and uses the opening to get on top of Rockwell and unload with punches. He chokes Rockwell on the middle rope before hitting a tiger feint kick. Jaxon peppers Rockwell with kicks inside. Rockwell absorbs them and knocks down Jaxon with a chop. Jaxon drop toe holds Rockwell into the middle turnbuckle. The time Jaxon spends admiring himself in the mirror allows Rockwell to recover and get in a flurry of offense, ending with a pop-up powerbomb for two. Jaxon snaps Rockwell’s neck on the top rope before hitting the through the ropes clothesline. He comes off the top with a dropkick to Rockwell, followed up with a discus forearm. Rockwell absorbs two of those and throws Jaxon overhead after ducking a third. He goes for the Hyperwheel. Jaxon is able to land on his feet and kicks Rockwell in the groin for the disqualification at 11:00. Rockwell’s promo was done well, but it just didn’t feel like his energy from that translated into the match. He had some great looking offense, but lacked fire in between. Jaxon played the role of a coward perfectly down to the DQ. It’s clear they have it in them to do a solid conclusion from this blueprint, so hopefully they can flesh things out and sprinkle in the attitude when it really counts. **¾
Jaxon grabs a microphone. He tells Rockwell he is tired of being embarrassed by him. Without Jaxon, Rockwell is nothing. He stomps on Rockwell’s groin before leaving.
Icarus vs. Rory Gulak
Gulak controls Icarus by his leg and then rides him in a waistlock. Icarus switches into a waistlock of his own, which Gulak rolls away from. Gulak also denies Icarus a handshake. Icarus drops his weight when Gulak goes for his leg again, right after Gulak uses the ropes to escape a waistlock. Icarus stacks up Gulak’s shoulders in a crucifix pin for two. Once again, no handshake from Gulak, so Icarus locks his joint and arm. He builds up tension in the arm until releasing so Gulak hits himself in the face. Embarrassed, Gulak takes a powder and then attacks Icarus from behind. Icarus slides to the apron when Gulak goes for the Gu-Lock. Gulak throws Icarus down by his hair, then hits a slingshot double stomp for two. Gulak chops Icarus, so Icarus responds with chops in multiple corners. Gulak stomps him down. Icarus back elbows Gulak as he comes off the ropes. He gets a quick cover after the Shiranui. A standing switch ends up with Gulak belly-to-belly suplexing Icarus into the corner. Gulak comes off the top with a splash, but Icarus gets his knees up to block it. Icarus tries for the Wings of Icarus. Gulak blocks by dropping to a knee. He spins Icarus by his knee before turning Icarus in a hands-free Scorpion Deathlock. Icarus rolls to his back to reverse the momentum, and Gulak grabs the ropes to relieve his knee and shin. Gulak and Icarus trade slaps as they get to their feet. Gulak overwhelms Icarus in the strike exchange, but Icarus wills a dropkick. Gulak backslides him for two. Icarus weaves Gulak into a Blu-Ray attempt. Gulak switches out and tries to hook Icarus for the Gu-Lock. Icarus walks up the ropes and falls back into a front bridge, pinning Gulak at 9:09. Begrudgingly, Gulak shakes Icarus’ hand. This was a solid back-and-forth wrestling match with Gulak showing a new found aggression and Icarus reminding us just how crafty he can be in the ring. That said, it feels like Icarus’ wheels are spinning in his current role. **½
Xyberhawx 2000 (Sylverhawk & Razerhawk) vs. Hermit Crab & Cajun Crawdad
X2K control the ring to start. Crab steps out of the way of a double dropkick. He sends Sylverhawk outside. He and Crawdad give Razerhawk the Low Tide early, but Sylverhawk interrupts the pin. He sends Razerhawk outside. The Crustaceans turn their attention to Sylverhawk as Razerhawk recovers, with Crab giving Sylverhawk a brutal spinebuster. They even knock Razerhawk off of the apron when he first becomes ready to tag in. After taking a lot of damage to his neck and upper back, Sylverhawk escapes a suplex from Crawdad and hits an enzuigiri. He elbows Crab to the floor and comes off the top with a high crossbody to Crawdad. Razerhawk creeps back onto the apron, and just as Sylverhawk leaps to tag, Crab sweeps out his legs and causes Razerhawk to crash onto the apron back first. Crawdad waterwheel slams Sylverhawk for two. Crab follows up with the Doctor Bomb for two. Sylverhawk ducks a double clothesline and takes down the Crustaceans with a headscissors/armdrag combo. Sylverhawk tumbles after Crawdad on the floor with a twisting plancha. Razerhawk enters the match with a top rope dropkick to Crab. A back handspring elbow follows up. Razerhawk does the deal with a Falcon Arrow but only gets two. Sylverhawk assists Razerhawk with a splash for two, as Crawdad breaks the pin. Crawdad gives Sylverhawk an Ace Crusher. Razerhawk drills Crab with the Razer’s Edge. Razerhawk cascades up Crab who counters with a powerbomb! He turns Razerhawk over into a Boston Crab. Sylverhawk superkicks Crab, but Crab doesn’t let the hold go! Sylverhawk gives Crab several open handed shots and another superkick, which finally forces him to let go. Razerhawk gets sent outside. Sylverhawk succumbs to Low Tide, but Razerhawk flings himself onto the cover to stop the count. Razerhawk gives Crab a couple of running shots in the corner. Crawdad pounces on Razerhawk mid-run the third time. Sylverhawk catches Crab during his Naniwa walk. Sylverhawk hooks him for a suplex off the middle rope. Crawdad stops him and the Crustaceans look for a double chokeslam. Razerhawk joins his partner and helps him double suplex the Crustaceans off the middle rope! Sylverhawk misses the Xyber Splash. Razerhawk dives off the top right into Crab’s claw. The Low Tide takes Razerhawk down for the pin at 13:17. This was exciting, fast paced, and very dramatic. The two teams worked their tails off and produced a quality match from both a story and wrestling perspective. The fact that this won’t be the last time we see these teams clash is great news. ***¼
Grand Championship
Juan Francisco de Coronado vs. Fire Ant
Juan Francisco de Coronado has been champion since 4.1.2017 and this is his sixth defense. Fire Ant’s gear is much darker than usual. Fire Ant controls Coronado by his arm in the opening exchange. Coronado escapes a bodyscissors and goes for Fire Ant’s ankles. Fire Ant scurries to the ropes to make Coronado back away. Fire Ant gets Coronado in a Royal Octopus hold. Coronado throw Fire Ant down and grabs Fire Ant’s legs, causing Fire Ant again to grab the ropes hurriedly. Fire Ant gives Coronado a high kick and a brainbuster for a one count, but Coronado rolls to the floor dazed. Fire Ant suicide dives after him. Back inside, Coronado grabs Fire Ant’s legs out of mid-air when Fire Ant attempts a high crossbody. He catches Fire Ant on the top turnbuckle and hooks him for a potential superplex. Fire Ant looks to counter with an Avalanche Beach Break. Coronado resists and slams Fire Ant back first onto the turnbuckle, and Fire Ant falls to the floor! Coronado drives Fire Ant back first into the ring post. Coronado does further damage to Fire Ant’s back inside the ring. A whip to the ropes seems to wake up Fire Ant, who shakes the ropes as Coronado strikes him. Another whip to the corner barely seems to affect Fire Ant! He meets Coronado forearm shot for forearm shot. The competitors daze each other with shots to the head. Coronado sends Fire Ant into the ropes by his belt and nails him with a lariat as he bounces back for two. Coronado grabs Fire Ant for the Coronado Clutch, but since Fire Ant is too mobile, Coronado spin out slams Fire Ant by his legs. Coronado gives Fire Ant a Death Valley Driver on the apron. Fire Ant gets in a few shots before Coronado then backdrops him on the ring apron. Coronado tosses Fire Ant into the ring post and drags him in a Coronado Clutch position into the aisle way. Coronado lets go at the count of 16 in the hopes of a countout victory. When Fire Ant shows signs of life, Coronado comes back out and gives him a triumvirate of gutwrench suplexes onto the floor! Coronado proudly parades the Ecuadorian flag and Grand championship as he gets back into the ring. Against all odds, Fire Ant crawls back into the ring before the twenty count. Fire Ant knocks down Coronado with a pair running forearms. Coronado ducks the Yahtzee Kick and gives Fire Ant a German suplex. Fire Ant recovers and Jon Woo dropkicks Coronado to the corner! He gives Coronado a brainbuster for two. Fire Ant wants the Beach Break, but Coronado turns it into the Tiger Driver for only a two count. Coronado pulls Fire Ant up by the antennae to the second rope. Coronado wants a super Tiger Driver, but Fire Ant fights back. He tries a super Frankensteiner, but Coronado instead brings him down with a super sit-out powerbomb! Yet, Fire Ant kicks out. Bryce stops Coronado from using the flag. He and Coronado get in a tug of war over the title. Fire Ant leapfrogs over Bryce as he’s falling with the title belt in hand into a low blow from Fire Ant! Coronado pins Fire Ant but only gets a two count! Coronado goes for the Coronado Clutch. Fire Ant counters into a prawn hold. Coronado pushes Fire Ant off to stop the cover, and Fire Ant is accidentally sent into Bryce who falls to the floor. Coronado goes to use his flag, but Fire Ant ducks and kicks him in the head. The same thing happens when Coronado tries using the belt. Fire Ant drops him with the Beach Break and covers Coronado. Bryce slides back in for a very close nearfall. As Bryce pulls himself up in the corner, Coronado uses the belt to blast Fire Ant’s leg as Fire Ant tries the Yahtzee Kick! Coronado puts on the Coronado Clutch. Fire Ant’s hand briefly touches the Grand Championship as Coronado pulls him into a bodyscissors. Fire Ant’s arm drops three times, giving Coronado the win at 25:26.
In a lot of ways, I was reminded of Fire Ant vs. Vin Gerard from Young Lions Cup VI. Fire Ant, one of the most beloved members of the roster (if not the most) fought the most reviled. Both competitors put in their best possible efforts, and Fire Ant impressed by withstanding everything Coronado unloaded. Coronado worked over Fire Ant’s back just like Gerard did. He tried to take the countout by ditching Fire Ant in the entrance way, just like Gerard did. The Beach Break got Fire Ant the win back then, and it almost did tonight. Had Bryce Remsburg been in the ring when the move landed, we may have had a new Grand Champion. Fire Ant literally felt the title pull away from his finger tips as Coronado pulled the Clutch into the bodyscissors. This was masterful storytelling. It captivated the crowd who lived and died with their hero, and in the nearly 26 minutes this match took place, all they wanted to see was Coronado lose. Brilliant stuff. ****¼
Encore Match
Dez Peloton (Jasper Tippins & Donald Kluger) vs. Los Ice Creams (El Hijo del Ice Cream & Ice Cream Jr.)
Hijo pinches Kluger’s fanny and gives him an overhead chop. Tippins says Kluger has a chest of steel and can take five more of those chops. So, Hijo gives him five more. Tippins raises the stakes saying he could take thirteen more. Thirteen chops from Hijo follow. Then fourteen. However, Hijo gets tired and Jr. has to finish them up for him. Tippins suggests fifty seven more chops to Kluger’s dismay. Kluger blocks a chop from Jr., then dishes out his own chops in the corner. Jr. relents when they get to thirty four chops. A good sport, Hijo stands in his place and lets Tippins give him the remaining twenty three chops. Tippins takes a poll on what the fans want. A Superman Punch, Cobra, and five knuckle shuffle do not entice. Kluger slams Hijo near their corner so he can convince Tippins to do a moonsault. He tags Tippins in who puts on helmet before unenthusiastically climbing the turnbuckles. Tippins can’t steady himself on top, so he moves to the second rope. Hijo rolls to the corner and tags in Jr. unbeknownst to them. However, Kluger slams Jr. right where Hijo was, so it doesn’t matter. Tippins is still figuring out the moonsault logistics, so Jr. sneaks out and tags in Hijo. Hijo gives Kluger the Superman Punch. Jr. sticks the Cobra into Kluger’s mouth, then jabs him in the throat. The five knuckle shuffle from Hijo follows. Tippins finally fires himself up enough to hit the moonsault, but accidentally does it to his own partner! Los Ice Creams pin both members of Dez Peloton for the pin at 7:39. This was comedy wrestling gold.
