Ciocco’s AEW Collision Review 3.22.25

Well, isn’t this a small world? Hello SICKOS! Guess who is covering the Slam Dunk Collision tonight in lieu of Mr. Theo Sambus (and also tomorrow night)? That’s right, you got ME here with you for these two episodes that, given the hour-long nature of both of them, will feel like Rampage has made a return for two nights this weekend only!

But, you know, if I am being honest with you, it makes more sense to split them up and allow them to try and catch the wave of the March Madness coverage.

So, what do we have on tap tonight? Well, the TNT Title is on the line, as Daniel Garcia will be defending against Adam Cole (BAYBAY)! Round three is on the horizon between Queen Aminata and Julia Hart, we have trios’ action, as Konosuke Takeshita teams with the Murder Machines to face Powerhouse Hobbs, Mark Briscoe, and Rocky Romero, and last and not least…

…Well, actually, yes, it is least…

Max Caster will issue the open challenge tonight, and we’ll get to see who comes out and puts him in his place!

So, how is everyone tonight? On a music related note, check out the new albums from Bloodywood, Cabal, Cradle of Filth, Imperial Triumphant, and SpiritWorld. They’re all varying degrees of good, and I would recommend them. From a sports standpoint, I wish it was September again already, but Phillies season starts next Thursday, and the Pacers have won four games in a row, albeit none of them were really dominant.

So, let’s Slam Dunk some good AEW action tonight!

Image Credit: FTR: Follow The Revolution on Facebook

We are (Not) LIVE from Omaha, Nebraska! Our announcers are Tony Schiavone and Nigel McGuiness!

DELAY DELAY DELAY! WE’RE JOINING THE ACTION RIGHT NOW!

AEW TNT Title: Daniel Garcia (C) vs. Adam Cole (BAYBAY)
Expected Star rating: ***1/2

As the one true cheerleader for Garcia, Matt Menard is on commentary for this one. Handshake to start us off. Both men exchange wrist locks. Garcia does his dance, as Nigel says Cole has singles in his tights. Alright. Garcia grounds Cole with a side headlock. Shove off by Cole, but Garcia runs over Cole. Arm drag takeover by Cole. He does his pose, and the fans love it. Another exchange, this time trading go-behinds. Shoulder tackle by Cole, but Garcia catches Cole’s foot. Both men exchange headlock takeovers, and we reset, nearly four minutes in. Menard calling anyone a sneaky bastard is rich in irony. Garcia takes Cole to the ropes but is aggressive on the break. Cole’s turn now, his swing is wild, and Garcia hits a slap. John WOOOOOOOOOOOO dropkick by Garcia. He hits a corner clothesline, mounts for punches. At six, Cole ducks underneath and posts Garcia, as he crashes to the floor.

Nigel: We got some Tony Schiavone fans here, it took them a while to get in with their walkers.

LMAO.

Garcia seems to be favoring his leg, as Cole launches him into the ring steps. Cole in to break the count, he goes and throws Garcia in the ring. Garcia steps on Danny’s bad knee on the bottom rope. Some kind of submission by Cole, NGL that is kind of creative. Garcia breaks the hold, gets to his feet, but Cole drops him and hits a modified BOOM on Garcia for a two count. Cole snaps the leg of Garcia and takes him to the corner. Garcia tries to fight back, but Cole goes back to the knee. Cole stretches his knee out in the ropes, follows up with a dropkick to the exposed knee. Cole thinking Figure-4, but Garcia with a roll up for a two. Backstabber by Cole, the cover for two count. PIP Break.

PIP Points:
-March Madness, you make me mad making this show go on late.
-Dynamite, live on TBS and MAX!
-Will knows that Logan is peddling fake lemons.
-The Amateur, out April 11.
-Lexus car looks just like Toyota, like for real.

We’re back, as Cole wraps Garcia’s injured knee around the ring post. He has the crazy eyes. Both men in the ring. DG WHOOP WHOOP chants. It isn’t helping, as Garcia can’t throw a strike without falling or getting overpowered. Garcia tries to channel the Undertaker, but side kick and an enziguri from Cole. Twist and Shout by Garcia. Both men up, Garcia hits the Test Drive. He throws Cole into the ropes, another Test Drive from the second rope. Cover, Cole is out at two. Garcia looking for a piledriver, no dice. Cole with a neckbreaker over his knee, cover for a two count. Garcia kicks Cole to the apron, he hits a running kick to drop Cole from the apron. Fans help Garcia up at ringside. Garcia lands a running drop kick to Cole, sitting conveniently in the chair by the barricade. Back in the ring, but Cole catches Garcia with another neckbreaker over the knee for a two count. Cole to the second rope, Panama Sunrise is cut off. Garcia twists the previously injured ankle of Cole over the top rope. Arkady tells us that five minutes remain. PANAMA SUNRISE BY COLE! The pin, but Garcia was too close to the ropes, and he grabs it to get the break. Cole looking for the Sunrise again, but Garcia falls out of the ring and to the floor. Cole tries it on the floor, Garcia moves, but he still can’t hit the piledriver. He can, however, hit Cole with a release German on the floor. Back in the ring, Garcia FINALLY hits the piledriver! Cover, Cole kicks out at two.

Down to the final three minutes, and both men are down. Garcia charges in, Cole fakes him out with the kick, ANOTHER PANAMA SUNRISE! GARCIA KICKS OUT AT 2.99999! Figure-4 by Cole. Garcia is in agony but finally makes it to the ropes. Cole tries a roll-up, but Garcia rolls through and applies the Dragon Tamer! Cole gets the break now. Small FIGHT FOREVER chant now.

Down to the final minute, as both men are trading hands on the apron. Garcia looking pildriver on the apron, but Cole kicks the leg out. PANAMA SUNRISE ON THE APRON! Cole rolls him in, Cole lowers the knee pad, but Garcia grabs the ankle. Cole loads up the BOOM, but the bell rings.
WINNER: Time Limit Draw (Garcia retains the TNT Title)
TIME: 20:00
THOUGHTS: Like we were getting any other result, really. It was a good match, featuring some psychology, even if Cole spammed the Panama Sunrise like it was going out of style. Clearly, this is going to continue at, say, Dynasty?
RATING: ***3/4

Max Caster’s Open Challenge is up next.

COMMERCIALS!

Max Caster is in the ring post break. OMAHA! You’re looking at the Best Wrestler Alive. He has a packed-out schedule, unlike his former tag team partner. WE WANT BOWENS chants. Max says Anthony won’t be back, because he ran his ass out of AEW. he knows his fans want to chant his name. LET’S GO MAX, YOU’RE THE BEST WRESTLER ALIVE! Come on, it’s four on the floor! Who can survive the Best Wrestler Alive!

HOOK vs. Max Caster
Excepted Star Rating: MURDER

HOOK comes out to the Opps theme, not his chairman theme. Max back in the ring now. The bell rings, but Caster says he knows HOOK has a lot to say, so he hits him with the mic. Caster stays ahead of HOOK and actually looks good. Well, until HOOK trips Caster. Red Rum, and Caster is ded.
WINNER: HOOK
TIME: 38 seconds
THOUGHTS: HE DED!
RATING: MURDER!

Lexy Nair has Queen Aminata in the back. She is one and one with Julia Hart, what can we expect tonight? Before she can speak, Serena Deeb is here. Apparently, Deeb has the took of a thousand wrestling moves. She hasn’t lied to her yet, has she? Aminata says thanks but no thanks, she thinks she can win this on her own. Deeb says we’ll see about that as she holds her book.

THE HOUSE HART ALWAYS WINS!

Julia Hart vs. Queen Aminata
Expected Star Rating: ***, these two have great chemistry

The bell rings and we get an early lock-up. Aminata reverses Hart for a two count. Another roll-up for a two. Hart’s turn now, backslide for a two. She tries again, another two count. ANOTHER flash pin attempt by Hart for two. Aminata with a pump kick to the knee, she hits a butterfly suplex. Both ladies on the apron, Aminata says BOOYAH and hits a standing chokeslam on the apron! PIP Break.

PIP is persona non grata 😉

We’re back, as Hart hits an STO on Aminata. Standing moonsault by Hart for a two count. Haet with a corner clothesline. Another one. Hart runs into Aminata, Air Raid Crash by the Queen for a two count. Axe kick to the stomach of Hart. She goes to the top rope, but Hart cuts her off and goes up, too. Hart with a release suplex from the top, she puts herself into the Tree of Woe. Looking for the moonsault from the top, Aminata moves. The Queen with a headbutt to Hart, cover for a two count. WOMEN’S WRESTLING chants. Aminata off the ropes, tries Off with Her Headbutt Hart moves and stacks up Aminata for the win!
WINNER: Julia Hart
TIME: 8:15
THOUGHTS: And the trilogy has been concluded! The question is, what do they do with Hart now? Obviously, they can move Aminata forward with Deeb, but does Hart try and reclaim her TBS Title, or do they push her for the Women’s Title? Pretty good match, although it felt short of time.
RATING: ***1/4

Our main event trios’ match is up next.

COMMERCIALS!

FEEL THE WRATH, Harley Cameron is here post break with Lexy. Lucha Libre is a fascinating world! She doesn’t see the point of discussing relations with a Bull. Lexy wants to know if her and Harley Gram are the same person, but Harley screams FEEL THE WRATH and runs off.

The non-Don Callis Family guys are out first for our main event!

Konosuke Takeshita, Lance Archer, and Brian Cage vs. Powerhouse Hobbs, Mark Briscoe, and Rocky Romero
Expected Star Rating: ***1/4, expecting big things from Hobbs and Takeshita.

As expected, Don Callis is on commentary. Briscoe and Takeshita to start. Takeshita with the power advantage, but Briscoe with the RED NECK KUNG-FU! Briscoe up top, but Takeshita with a well-timed punch to the gut. Briscoe to the Callis Corner, he kicks Archer off the apron. Blind tag by Hobbs, He overpowers Takeshita. Romero tags in, hits the double stomp from the top. Romero looking tope suicida, but he is caught by Cage, and they hit their finisher on the apron. Powerbomb on Briscoe by Takeshita. PIP Break.

Points of PIPority:
-Streaming on Max, in case you forgot!
-DUCK with Dawn!
-Ever had trouble with your weight? SAME!
-Using All-Star is very cliche.
-I feel like this is the 100th time they’ve run the PayPal commercial.
-Step into your Toyota, ere I mean Lexus!
-Coca-Cola Orange Cream, not bad!
-Joe Schmoe Blow is finally over!
-March Madness, it’s so mad it extends into April!

We’re back, as Takeshita is bullying Romero in the middle of the ring. Rocky tries to fight back, but Takeshita with a slap. It fires up Azucar, though, and peppers Konosuke with forearms. Tornado DDT by Romero. He rolls through and tags in Briscoe. Cage is in because he can be. Mark fights them both off as Shaun Smith lets it go. Archer now in because he can be, and they treat Briscoe like a volleyball. Takeshita with the cover for a two count. Friendly fire between Cage and Takeshita, Hobbs is now in. Hobbs goes back and forth between Cage and Archer, from corner to corner. The straps are down, but Takeshita in. Swing and a miss, SPINE ON THE PINE by Hobbs. Cage hits a combo punctuated by the release German. Romero tags in, he is caught by Cage. Hobbs with a Spinebuster on Cage. Takeshita with the Blue Thunder Bomb on Hobbs. Briscoe in, but Takeshita with a kick. Exploder by Briscoe. Archer smashes Briscoe. Archer tries the Blackout on Romero, but he fights out. Archer ducks, but a low enziguri connects. Cover for a two. Romero off the ropes, but he gets smashed by Archer, again. The Murder Machine hit their finisher. Takeshita now, Raging Fire, and that’s game.
WINNER: Lance Archer, Brian Cage, and Konosuke Takeshita
TIME: 11:00
THOUGHTS: Rocky was the fall guy, as was to be expected. Takeshita getting the win was the right call, because he needs to be rebuilt after losing his International Title. A good match, but not great.
RATING: ***

And with that, hour one of Slam Dunk Collision is done. On to hour two Sunday Night at 11:00PM!

7.2

The final score: review Good

The 411

Hour one of Slam Dunk Collision featured a fair variety of action on the docket, with the predictable finish of a time limit draw between Cole and Garcia getting to cook first. The main event trios match was fine, Hart and Aminata was really solid, and Caster getting murdered in his own open challenge is always fun. Day two is upon us on Sunday, and we'll see how it rates against this one.