wrestling / TV Reports

Cook’s WWE Money in the Bank 2018 Report Card

June 17, 2018 | Posted by Steve Cook
AJ Styles Money in the Bank Image Credit: WWE

Hi, hello & welcome to the Money in the Bank 2018 Report Card! I’m Steve Cook, and I don’t know how much longer I’ll be doing one of these. Probably until SummerSlam, when I say “Peace out” about 5 hours into the 10 hour show. As great as wrestling is overall in 2018, it just feels like these WWE Network extravaganzas aren’t really part of the fun.

Think about it. Just in the past several days we’ve seen things like Kenny Omega winning the IWGP Heavyweight Championship in a seven star match. Chris Jericho debuted a new look and reestablished his relevance. There was all great NXT stuff I heard about while sleeping last night. NXT & New Japan get tons of love. The WWE PPVs…eh, not so much.

Can Money in the Bank change that trend? Let’s find out…

Here’s how I grade the WWE Superstars…

A – Outstanding. Great moves, selling, interaction with the fans, everything. Stands out as a top performer.
B – Above Average. Very good offensively or defensively. Plays their role well. Helps the match accomplish what it set out to do.
C – Average. The type of performance that does nothing to stand out. No outstanding moves, no great effort to sell their opponent’s offense or draw the crowd into what they’re doing, just bland, basic wrestling. Sometimes, especially in a multi-man match, a short period of time spent in the ring without a chance to do too much.
D – Below Average. Poor execution, ignoring the crowd, not doing things that make sense.
F – Failure. Not doing anything useful. Actively holding the match back from accomplishing its objective.

We got Michael Cole, Jonathan Coachman & Corey Graves calling the Raw matches. Graves joins Tom Phillips & Bryon Saxton for the SmackDown matches.

Kickoff Show Match For The SmackDown Tag Team Championship: The Bludgeon Brothers vs. Gallows & Anderson

Yep, that was the build for this match. The Club beat the Usos for a title shot at some point, but this program’s flown under the radar like the SD tag title scene has for the past couple of years. Definitely Kickoff Show material. Gallows & Anderson get some offense early, but that doesn’t last long. Anytime Michael Cole or Tom Phillips say the word “rolling”, it’s time for commercial. Gallows was taken out & Anderson gets to take the offense as usual. How come they didn’t build this with a Gallows vs. Harper singles match? That would have been fun. An assisted sit-out powerbomb ends a surprisingly competitive match in favor of the Bludgeon Brothers in seven & a half minutes. Considering these guys ran through New Day & the Usos like a hot knife through butter, the Good Brothers got a pretty good showing here. That’s ok for them, I’m not sure if it’s good for Harper & Rowan though.

Grades
Bludgeons: C
Goods: C

In case you’re wondering if they were going to mention CM Punk tonight, Booker T already mentioned that he got the brakes beat off him. So that’s a thing.

Nia Jax vs. Ronda Rousey is getting the main event hype on the Kickoff Show & on the opening video. I’m getting ready for Twitter to get mad.

Daniel Bryan vs. Big Cass

Boy, if this match goes the way I think it will, the Chicago folks will not be happy! Bryan leap-frogging Cass is pretty impressive. He tried the Flair flip in the corner, but that damn Cass wouldn’t play along and let him run to the other corner. This man has no idea what fun is. He works over Bryan for a few minutes while I catch up on other stuff. Cass offensive sequences are a good time to do other things you need to do. Bryan does fun things like ramming Cass’s knee into the apron & punching the knee. Good times. Cass tries to counter a running knee, but Bryan turns it into the Yes Lock. The Yes Lock is Bryan’s secondary submission finisher now so he’s good. He still dives off the top rope like a lunatic. Cass does the fallaway slam off the middle turnbuckle for a near fall. Are they saying “Asshole” or “Casshole”? Cass goes to the Human Torture Rack, and then drops him out of it for two. I wonder if Drew Gulak taught him that. Yes kicks! Flap jack & a big boot by Cass gets two. Good near-fall. Cass puts on another Torture Rack, but Bryan flips out of the drop & hits the running knee. He drags him to the middle of the ring & locks in the heel hook! Cass has to tap out.

That heel hook’s a solid piece of business right there. Good match that gave Cass more of a chance to shine. Do they drag this out to Extreme Rules, or give Bryan a shot at the winner of Styles/Nakamura? The latter seems like something that would interest people in that show.

Grades
Bryan: B+
Cass: B-

Kevin Owens brings The New Day pancakes. He wants to know who the member entering the match is, and if they’ll help him take out Braun Strowman. They won’t cheat! Apparently Kevin doesn’t actually like pancakes or breakfast food in general, and disses the New Day’s cereal. Bad move, KO.

Bobby Lashley vs. Sami Zayn

Sami appears to be the favorite here in Chicago based on everybody singing along with his music. He’s not the favorite as far as physicality goes. He’s smart though, and that’s what the announcers are pushing here as he tries to get the countout victory. I gotta say Cass’s fallaway slam was smoother than Bobby’s. The fans asked for one more vertigo suplex, & Bobby gave them one. What jackals. He’s repeating himself. And for the first time I can remember, a vertigo suplex ends a match. Lashley goes over strong. Sami did a good job putting him over.

Grades
Bobby: C
Sami: B

Nia Jax is explaining the rules to a WWE referee. Seems like a useful way to spend one’s time. Ronda Rousey throws shadow punches while Natalya looks on.

WWE Intercontinental Championship Match: Seth Rollins (c) vs. Elias

Chicago will gladly own up to Elias’ accusation that they’re loudmouthed scumbags. Lotta wet hair & beard going on with these two. Rollins takes the upper hand early on the mat & outside the ring. He’s certainly the experienced man in the match. A clothesline by Elias that lands Seth head first on the apron turns the tide. Gotta take the apron bump! Elias goes on offense for awhile, & Rollins tweaks the knee so Elias can go on offense some more. Seth’s selling gets criticized sometimes, but I think he’s doing a good job with it tonight. I mean, that superplex into the Falcon Arrow might be a bit iffy, but we can count that under FIGHTING SPIRIT maybe. No Stomp, and Elias tosses Rollins around outside. Flying elbow gets a 2. Elias tries Drift Away, we get a series of reversals, & Rollins grabs the tights for a three count!

Pretty good match there. I don’t think it was the show-stealer that some people were calling for, but it was a solid piece of business. Certainly a game-changer for Elias, as the champ had to cheat to win.

Grades
Rollins: B
Elias: B

Women’s Money in the Bank Ladder Match: Ember Moon vs. Charlotte Flair vs. Alexa Bliss vs. Becky Lynch vs. Natalya vs. Lana vs. Naomi vs. Sasha Banks

I think JoJo said “Money in the Banks Ladder Match”. Somebody tell the Botched guy. Phillips, Graves & Coach call the action here. Ember Moon is getting the ladder teases early. She crossbodies Sasha Banks on top of the ladder, which might not be good for the Boss. Lana delivering the offense! X-Factor into the ladder! She tosses that one aside & gets a bigger one. Nattie almost gets crushed by it. She slams Lana on top of the bigger one. Naomi’s tailbone meets the bigger one. Charlotte goes after Natalya like old times. Becky wants some now. She & Charlotte argue over ladder possession. Naomi wins the fight. She blockbusts Sasha on the floor. I bet Naomi & Ember would have a fun match. Sasha takes charge, then Charlotte joins her. They’ve had some issues before. Becky tips Sasha off the ladder. Alexa comes in & Sasha knocks her off. Becky certainly is active. Lana sets up the bigger ladder next to Sasha & Becky on top of a smaller ladder. Six women are on the two ladders. Charlotte powerbombs Ember into a ladder. She’s taking everybody out, and Alexa’s the last one left. Code Red by Alexa! Lana kicks her head off! Lana Crush! She locks in the Accolade! She needs to climb the ladder. She does, but Naomi appears as well! She knocks Lana off, but can’t undo the briefcase! Becky re-positions the ladder after disposing of Naomi, but Charlotte joins her on top. They face off, and Alexa knocks the ladder over. Doesn’t matter, Flair spears her out of the ring. Sasha backstabs Charlotte, Naomi rams Sasha’s head into the ladder. Lana yanks Naomi off the ladder. Natalya electric chairs Lana. Ember kicks Natalya out. Charlotte yanks her off & spears her into the ladder. Becky Becksplodes Charlotte! The fans want her to do it, but here comes Alexa! Becky flies off face first into the ladder, and it’s Alexa Bliss for the win!

Alexa winning makes the most sense for sure. As I said in the preview, she needs to get back in the title picture, and the best way to do that is by cashing in on either Nia Jax or Ronda Rousey. From a booking perspective it makes the most sense, and it allows Alexa to talk every week.

Roman Reigns vs. Jinder Mahal

Sunil Singh has seen better days. Kinda makes his MIA brother look like a puss when he’s coming out in a wheelchair, arm sling & neckbrace. OK, Chicago, this is a good time for a CM Punk chant. Or for whatever other chant you wanna throw out there. Spoiler alert: Sunil is actually ok, he’s just working the old Ron Wright gimmick. Jinder slips on the apron during his offensive onslaught. Beach ball sighting! Wave! Repeated clotheslines! I’ll be honest with you guys, I never really paid any attention to this. LOL Roman Won let’s move on shall we?

Grades
Roman: N/A
Jinder: N/A

WWE SmackDown Women’s Championship Match: Carmella (c) vs. Asuka

Carmella talkin all types of trash early. She’s the champion, so she’s entitled. Asuka won’t suffer it long though. After getting knocked out of the ring Carmella wants to walk off with the belt. Asuka won’t let that happen. Carmella gets back on top. I find that people either think that Carmella is completely useless or is the best wrestler alive. Not sure why. She’s one step ahead of Asuka so far. She’s doing dives & screaming a lot, so that should put most of the unsold on her bandwagon. A mystery person appears on the ring apron wearing an Asuka mask & robe. Asuka is distracted, Carmella rolls her up for two. The mask is taken off, and it’s James Ellsworth! Carmella kicks Asuka in the head & gets the three count!

If you read the news you knew it was coming. I don’t know if I would have been overjoyed if I didn’t know it was coming, but it was something or other. Good showing from Carmella, but I don’t think this does anything to help Asuka’s status at all. She’s looking like another one of those NXT acts that got all hyped up only to bust on the main stage. Happens pretty often.

Grades
Carmella: B
Asuka: C

Last Man Standing Match for the WWE Championship: AJ Styles (c) vs. Shinsuke Nakamura

I see people complaining about this not going on last. Have you seen the feud? They’re still great wrestlers, but let’s be honest: the feud’s been booked like the drizzling excrements. They’ve managed to make us not want to see this match at least for the next couple of years. Maybe that’ll change tonight. Hopefully. Styles dominates early since he’s the good brother. Nakamura suplexes Styles on the ramp to turn the tide. He’s taking it to the Phenomenal One & the referee keeps counting. The Network & my laptop crapped out during this match so I missed a good chunk of it. Got back for a Kinshasa on the announce table. Styles beats the count. WE GOT A TABLE IN THE RING! Styles gets slammed on the side of it, which is different. He goes through the table in the corner & barely beats the count. Styles blocks a ramming into an exposed turnbuckle. Nakamura sets up the knee in the corner & ends up hitting that exposed turnbuckle with it. Styles locks in the Calf Crusher, which can’t win the match, but can make Nakamura unable to get up. He does anyway. JoJo looks pretty uneasy when AJ comes over to take a chair. LOW BLOW! Styles makes it up somehow after the low blow, but Nakamura delivers the Kinshasa with the injured knee. Seems to work, Styles makes it up with a split second left. AJ delivers the Phenomenal Forearm! Styles Clash off the stairs to the floor! I think on the stairs would have been the right play there. Sure enough, Nakamura gets up. COME ON. LOW BLOW by Styles! Phenomenal Forearm through the announce table! Well if that’s not it they’re going to need the NRA to end this one. They don’t, AJ Styles is the Last Man Standing!

I missed part of this one, but from what I saw they finally delivered that really good match we’ve been hoping for. The downside is I feel silly for continually picking Nakamura to win the championship at some point. I think I’ve picked him in every title match he’s had going back to when he challenged Jinder! Goodness gracious.

Grades
Styles: A
Nakamura: A

WWE Raw Women’s Championship Match: Nia Jax (c) vs. Ronda Rousey

This is apparently the fifth time somebody has challenged for a singles title in their first match. Somebody should Ask 411 who the other four were. I don’t expect this to last long, & Nia is moving around like it won’t. She’s calling for that Samoan Drop, but Rousey turns it into an arm bar attempt! She turns it into a triangle choke, but Nia sit-out powerbombs her out of it. Rousey tumbles out of the ring. Nia swings Ronda into the barricade. Gorilla press drop like she’s the Ultimate Warrior gets two. Bear hug! Ronda gets an arm bar but she’s in the ropes. She’s going up top! Cross body block gets two! Rousey with some punches & a high knee! Judo throw gets two! Arm bar is turned into a rollup by Nia for two! Modified Rock Bottom, and Ronda’s going for that arm bar again…she almost has it, but here comes Alexa Bliss with the briefcase! She attacks Rousey first, which I’m pretty sure means that Rousey wins by disqualification. She sends Rousey into the post & outside…will she cash in? Well, she needs to hit Ronda couple of more times first. Briefcase to Jax’s arm a couple of times, and now she tells the referee she’s cashing in the Money in the Briefcase contract! Hey, that’s what JoJo told me.

WWE Raw Women’s Championship Match: Nia Jax (c) vs. Alexa Bliss

Alexa hits Twisted Bliss & wins the Championship in about thirty seconds! The Goddess is back on top! I can dig it. Good showing from Jax & Rousey before their parade was rained on. I’m probably being generous to Rousey since it was her second match, but she’s really quite good.

Grades
Jax: A
Rousey: A

Men’s Money in the Bank Ladder Match: Braun Strowman vs. Finn Balor vs. The Miz vs. Rusev vs. Bobby Roode vs. Kevin Owens vs. Samoa Joe vs. New Day Member Kofi Kingston

Aiden English representing for Chi-Town! Kofi Kingston gets the New Day spot, which makes sense from an experience level as he’s now tied Kane as the man in the most MITB ladder matches. Everybody goes after Braun & rams him with ladders. They throw some ladders on top of him too for good measure. Miz takes advantage of the distraction & climbs the ladder in the middle of the rin-well never mind here’s Joe. Kofi comes in & takes out Joe with Trouble in Paradise, then a Boom Drop to Miz sandwiched under a ladder! KO gets Kofi outta there. Finn climbs the ladder to meet him. KO thinks about climbing a ladder to put Balor through a table. Rusev climbing a ladder in the ring changes the plans. Joe & Rusev go in & go out. Kofi goes up top & gets caught by most of the people in the match…Balor’s dive after takes the rest out. Finn grabs a ladder off top of Braun, which was a bad idea because Braun’s back up. Joe delivers a forearm, Owens with a super kick, Rusev with a super kick, and Owens finds a table. Joe locks the choke on Strowman and a superkick readies Strowman to lay on the table. Owens goes up…really tall ladder by the way…Braun gets off the table & KO is in trouble…he & Braun are on top of the ladder, & Braun tosses him through a platform! That might be it for Owens tonight. Braun runs through a ladder held by Roode & Balor. Miz holds a ladder in the ring & looks like a deer looking into the headlights. Joe clotheslines Braun over the top rope. Balor takes Braun out temporarily, but that’s all it is. The other guys each get a chance to climb (minus Owens of course), but at the end of the day it’s the Monster Among Men claiming the briefcase & becoming the…Monster in the Bank? OK Michael.

Some will say that Braun doesn’t need the briefcase. While they may be right that other people need it more, they’re wrong that Braun doesn’t need it. He needs to win these types of matches if he’s really going to be a top guy. Winning the MITB Ladder Match & the Greatest Royal Rumble in a short amount of time re-establishes him as a major player that has to be dealt with. Brock Lesnar might want to consider not returning for SummerSlam, or for anything else.

Final Thought

Not counting the pre-show, it was only slightly over four hours. At this point I’ll take that from a WWE event. The crowd was into most things, the performers did their best & the booking was fairly interesting. Nothing got seven stars, but nothing got zero either. It was a good night for WWE. And it’s good night for me.

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Money in the Bank, Steve Cook