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Csonka’s Impact Wrestling Review 3.29.19
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Csonka’s Impact Wrestling (Against All Odds 2019) Review 3.29.19
OFFICIAL RESULTS
– Scarlett Bordeaux defeated Disco Inferno @ 6:30 via pin [*]
– Knockouts Title Match: Jordynne Grace defeated Champion Taya @ 12:45 via countout [**¾]
– Killer Kross defeated Cage @ 15:30 via pin [***]
– Follow all of my reviews at this link.
– Konnan calls out the Lucha Bros, and tells them he knew all of this would happen.
LAX vs. Lucha Bros: This is an “Unsanctioned Fight.” The champs hit the ring and they brawl. Security arrives and tries to separate them. They do and it’s over as security gets their ass kicked. The Luchas attack with chair shots, get tables, but LAX fights back and puts them through the tables. LAX stands tall with the belts. I expect full metal mayhem at Rebellion.
– Konnan & LAX are fired up backstage, talking about getting respect and the titles. Konan challenges the champions to full metal mayhem at Rebellion.
– Disco tells Bordeaux it’s ok for her to call off the match. Bordeaux arrives and looks ready to roll.
Scarlett Bordeaux vs. Disco Inferno: Bordeaux goes for pins right away, follows with chops and Disco powders. Back in and Disco grabs her hair and attacks. He misses attacks, Bordeaux stuns him off the ropes and hits a stunner. She heads up top and the high cross gets 2. Bordeaux follows with clotheslines, but Disco cuts her off. The hip toss follows, and he then stomps away at her. Disco talks trash, and continues to stomp away at her. Bordeaux slowly fires back, but Disco cuts her off again. He misses a charge and Bordeaux follows with kicks and strikes. The stink face follows, and the stunner gets 2. Disco hits the Russian leg sweep, and the Village People’s elbow connects. He follows with mounted punches, but Bordeaux scores with a powerbomb and pins him. Scarlett Bordeaux defeated Disco Inferno @ 6:30 via pin [*] This wasn’t any good, but at least the right person won.
– Taya is interviewed and says that Grace may be strong, but not as strong as her. She plans to win tonight. Impact says it would be a shame if Cage got concussed again tonight.
– Disco gets made fun of backstage for losing.
– The GWN flashback is RVD vs. Styles from 2010.
– We get a Josh Alexander video package.
– Tessa comments on her issues with Gail Kim. Tessa says Gail has no choice because she has Impact by the balls. Gail is no legend, and diamonds are forever.
– We get footage from RVD’s documentary.
– Madison Rayne returns next week.
.@MadisonRayne returns to IMPACT NEXT WEEK!
And she hasn't forgotten about her unfinished business with @Tess_Blanchard and @realsuyung!
WATCH NOW – https://t.co/jyZYT6QL46 pic.twitter.com/HtqsDY577b
— IMPACT (@IMPACTWRESTLING) March 30, 2019
– The Lucha Bros accept Konnan’s challenge for full metal mayhem.
Tessa Calls Out Gail Kim: Tessa calls out Gail Kim and wants the apology & resignation from Kim she feels she deserves. Kim arrives and Tessa runs her down. Tessa demands her apology, and Kim says she’ll do what she needs to do and says she’s sorry. Tessa makes her expand on the apology, and she does. Tessa wants Kim’s resignation, which Kim says she gave to management. Tessa says she’s sorry that in Kim’s era they are only known for bra and panty matches and pillow fights, while she’s main eventing shows. Tessa adds that Kim couldn’t compete in her era or lace her boots. Tessa tells her to leave, but Kim says that she resigned under one condition, she’s out of retirement to kick Tessa’s ass. She attacks and Tessa bails. Kim follows to the floor and rolls her back in but Tessa escapes. This was good overall, with Tessa coming off as a complete spoiled brat of a bitch in the best way possible, and setting up the big match, likely for Rebellion.
– Tessa vs. Gail is official for Rebellion.
– We get a video package on the issues between Swann & Callihan.
– oVe has Mad Man Fulton undergoing some clockwork orange style shit.
Champion Taya vs. Jordynne Grace: They lock up, working into some back and forth and Grace takes early control as she overpowers Taya. Taya cuts her off with an eye poke, but Grace hits a shoulder tackle for 2. Grace follows with strikes, but Taya cuts her off with kicks and knee strikes. Grace battles back, hitting a German and Taya powders. Grace follows, and gets posted. Back in and Taya covers for 2. She mocks Grace and follows with chops. The charging knees follow and the cover gets 2. Taya chokes her out, lays in more chops and then strikes. Grace looks to fight back, but Taya hits a great looking spear for 2. Post break and Grace hits a suplex and then posts Taya. The double knees follow and then a running elbow; the Vader bomb gets 2. They work into counters, Grace follows with rights and takes Taya up top. Grace follows her up and Taya fights her off with head butts. The moonsault then misses, but Taya escapes the Grace driver and Johnny Impact is out. Johnny takes her for a walk and countout loss. Jordynne Grace defeated Champion Taya @ 12:45 via countout [**¾] This was getting better the longer it went on, but it was a bit rough early and the finish was really flat. The good news is that Grace didn’t lose, and the post match came off well though.
– Cage arrives to attack Impact, he hides behind Taya and Kross lays out Cage.
Cage vs. Killer Kross: JIP with Kross in early control until Cage cuts him off and levels him with clotheslines. Kross then cuts him off and posts him. The hammerlock slam follows, and Kross covers for 2. Kross starts focusing on the arm of Cage, but Cage fights off the arm bar. The enziguri follows, but Kross fights off the suplex by stunning the arm off the ropes. He grounds things and continues to work the arm. Kross looks for the arm bar, but Cage makes the ropes. Kross follows with strikes, but Cage cuts him off with a desperation DDT. Post break and they are trading strikes and Cage hits a superkick and clothesline. Kross fires up, locks on the choke, but Cage escapes and hits a powerslam and moonsault for 2. Kross attacks the arm, hits the Saito suplex but Cage kicks out at 1. A pair of powerbombs follow and the lariat gets 2 for Cage. Cage hits F5, but Johnny Impact arrives and puts Kross’ foot on the ropes. Taya arrives, low blows Cage and Kross hits the Saito twice and only gets 2. The ref rings the bell and claims it was a 3 count. Killer Kross defeated Cage @ 15:30 via pin [***] This was a good hossy battle with the disputed finish and good post match angle.
– Post match, Impact attacks and hits the running knee. He then Pillmanizes the arm conchairto style.
Rosemary Goes to The Undead Realm: Rosemary heads to the undead realm with Allie chained up with her. They arrive and Hogan snuck in there with them. They meet with Jim Mitchell and his menagerie of freaks. Luchasaurus is there and Rosemary battles him and she mists him and kills him with a monkey wrench. Two more freaks attack and she kills them with a meat cleaver. Undead brides enter and Hogan grabs a sword and tosses it to Rosemary, who murders the brides. Su arrives and unchains Allie. They all fight, but Allie can’t bring herself to stab Rosemary. Mitchell stops things, kidnapping Hogan. Kevin Sullivan is revealed as the master and is disappointed with Rosemary. Su tries to attack and accidentally kills Allie. Allie turns back into her old self and her soul is restored. They have a tear filled goodbye, as Allie disappears to AEW. Well, that’s a hell of a write-off as they actually killed off the character Lucha Underground style. You either loved or hated this.
– End scene.
– Thanks for reading.
The 411 on Wrestling Podcast returns to the 411 Podcasting Network for episode 7. On the show, 411’s Larry Csonka is joined by Jeremy Lambert Jr III. The guys will start previewing WrestleMania week, with full previews of Impact Wrestling: United We Stand PPV, NXT Takeover: New York, & the ROH/NJPW G1 Supercard event. The show is approximately 117 minutes long.
* Intro
* Impact Wrestling: United We Stand PPV Preview: 3:00
* NXT Takeover: New York Preview: 27:40
* ROH/NJPW G1 Supercard Preview: 58:15
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