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Join 411’s Live WrestleMania 32 Replay on ESPN Coverage

March 29, 2020 | Posted by Larry Csonka
Roman Reigns Triple H WrestleMania 32 Image Credit: WWE

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Csonka’s WrestleMania 32 on ESPN Review

– Follow all of my reviews at this link.

– Tom Phillips & Corey Graves join us from the studio to kick off the show. They then hype this year’s event and IT’S OH MY GOD TOO BIG FOR ONE NIGHT!

WWE Intercontinental Title Ladder Match: Champion Kevin Owens vs. The Miz vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Sami Zayn vs. Stardust vs. Zack Ryder vs. Sin Cara: Despite the way it got here, I am so happy for these guys. We got some Zayn vs. Owens early, it didn’t last long and we got to the ladders involved rather quickly. Tons of moving parts here, with bodies flying to the floor and Zayn hitting an awesome dive Through the ladder onto the pile and then the corner through the ropes dive into a DDT onto Owens. Another great spot was Cara climbing, the ladder getting shoved over, leading to him springing off the ropes into a sweet senton onto (sorta, they didn’t really catch him) the pile on the floor. STARDUST PULLED OUT A POLKA DOTTED LADDER! He then did the spinning Terry Funk spot with it, TEXAS! Owens then placed Zayn on a ladder, angled on the bottom rope, and hit a wild frog splash. There was lots of great stuff happening here, with everyone getting a chance to shine. Stardust got laid on a ladder bridge between the ring and barricade, and Owens toppled the ladder and Cara flew out onto Stardust. Yeah, these guys are killing themselves. It came down to Owens and Zayn battling it out on the ladder, they fought to the mat and Zayn KILLED Owens with a half and half suplex onto a ladder. THAT MAN HAS A FAMILY! Miz stopped Zayn from climbing to HUGE heat, he climbed but took his time and Ryder returned and tossed him off and RYDER WINS! Zack Ryder won the IC Title @ 15:30

– Tom Phillips & Corey Graves kill time.

New Day vs. The League of Nations w/King Barrett: New Day actually poured out of a giant box of BootyO’s, dressed in Sayian Armour from Dragon Ball Z. And this is now a six-man tag, with Barrett the odd man out. New Day got the unicorn stampede early and got the crowd into things, and then the League took the advantage and I ate some pasta salad. No one cares about the League, no matter how many times JBL tries to compare them to the Horsemen. You’re drunk JBL, go home. The League worked over Woods for what felt like forever, I’d say they got the heat but there was none. Kofi finally got the tag, he ran wild and leg dropped Rusev and Sheamus at the same time. Sheamus countered trouble in paradise, tried for the cloverleaf, Kofi fought and then Rusev put a stop to that. They are using the big screen to try and get the fans to cheer for this, and it’s not working. The League of Nations won, moving on please. The League of Nations defeated New Day @ 10:07 via pin

– Barrett cut a post match promo, noting that no three-man unit could go face to face with them. Shawn Michaels then appeared… IN GEAR. He was joined by Mick Foley and Steve Austin. New Day pulled Barrett to the floor and team Legends beat up the League of Nations. Socko, superkick and a stunner with an awesome Rusev sell. Barrett then ate socko, a superkick and stunner to send him into free agency. Austin also gave Woods a stunner.

– Tom Phillips & Corey Graves hype Styles vs. taker for Mania.

Hell in the Cell Match: Undertaker vs. Shane McMahon: Shane played hit and move, trying to make Taker move around and to tire him out, which he previously talked about. Taker seemed more annoyed than hurt, and took control of things pretty quickly. Taker hit the last ride at about 5-minutes in, and got a near fall. Taker brought in the steps, but Shane got a desperation triangle choke, which slowed Taker down for a moment. He then chokeslammed Shane on the steps, and that got a near fall. Shane managed a DDT to Taker on the steps, and that got Shane a near fall at about 10-minutes in. Shane then survived hells gate very slowly turned it into the sharp shooter. Shane beat down Taker in the corner, got a trash can and then hit the Van Terminator for a near fall. Shane then got bolt cutters, and cut away at the cage. This of course led to Taker slamming Shane through the cage, and the panel gave way. Taker took apart announce tables and hit Shane with a monitor. There is a continent platform beside the one announce table, Shane countered the tombstone with a sleeper, so Taker broke it by jumping and putting both of them through the table. Shane then got a tool box and nailed Taker with it twice and laid him out on one of the tables. He also hit Taker with the monitor, and then climbed the cage. He jumped and Take moved, sending Shane crashing through the table (I don’t care how padded that was, dude is a 46 year old man that did not have to do that, it may have been stupid but I respect it). Cole actually yelled, “for the love of Mankind,” which was actually a great call. I am shocked that they did not show his kid’s reaction here. Taker got to his feet, and Shane called him on for more. Taker brought him back into the ring, hit the tombstone and that was that. Undertaker defeated Shane McMahon @ 30:10 via pin

WWE Women’s Title Match: Champion Charlotte vs. Sasha Banks vs. Becky Lynch: The opening minute was all three trading pining combos, leading to them trying to keep the pacing up and work some three-way spots. The action spilled to the floor for a bit, where Banks got taken out (in an odd spot between her and Charlotte that did not come off well), leaving Becky and Charlotte alone in the ring. Charlotte took the heat, tried to work the leg and then Banks returned only for Becky to toss her back over the top and to the floor. Banks got a great near fall off of a frog splash as Charlotte worked the figure four on Becky, it came off very well as a near submission moment. Banks hit meteora on Charlotte, but Becky then took out Banks and hit a uranage on Banks for the near fall as Charlotte made the save. Banks hit a suicide dive on Charlotte, she got a foot caught on the ropes but tucked and saved herself. Becky then hit a dive and took out Ric as Banks pulled him into it. That was creative and payback for Ric’s constant interference. Charlotte then said fuck it and hit a moonsault all the way to the floor onto both! Back in, Charlotte hit natural selection on both, but both kicked out of pin attempts. Charlotte posted Becky, Banks went for a RANA, Charlotte stopped that and they ended up doing a doomsday device spot, which was a little rough. Becky had Charlotte in disarmher, but Sasha broke it up and got the Banks statement. Charlotte then locked in the figure four on Banks, Becky escaped. Charlotte worked to keep the hold, and Becky ended up saving Banks. All three battled from their knees, Charlotte speared Banks and Lynch went on the attack. They battled up top, Banks into the tree of woe, and Lynch climbed and Becky got the superplex on Charlotte. Banks got the Bank statement, but Charlotte tossed her to the floor and got the figure eight on Becky and she tapped. Commentary informs us that Ric held Banks’ foot so she couldn’t get back in the ring. They needed to talk that up BEFORE the finish. Champion Charlotte defeated Sasha Banks and Becky Lynch @ 16:07 via submission

– We see the Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders dancing

THE ROCK IS HERE TO DO SOMETHING: Rock came out and had a flame thrower, because why the fuck not, he’s the Rock. Poor Dean Ambrose was backstage going, “so that’s where the cool shit I wanted to use went.” So Rock came out and gave what felt like a Saturday Night Live monologue. His sole purpose here was to announce 101,763 in attendance (for entertainment purposes only) and that was that. We needed 10-minutes to do that, but the crowd loved the Rock so it worked. But wait, The Wyatts arrived. Basically Wyatt wants to kill Rock at Mania because Rock is famous and popular. Rock of course mocked and made fun of Wyatt, making marijuana, weight, breast feeding and inbreeding jokes. After his comedy set, Rock put over Wyatt, sorta. Rock challenged one of them to a match and had his gear on under his pants. He hit a rock bottom on Rowan and won “in six seconds.” The Wyatts went to attack, but John Cena arrived. They beat up the Wyatts, who were so dead in the water at this point any way that it didn’t matter, but they still did it anyway.

Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal: All of the usual goofs make their way out; Baron Corbin is out there and so is DDP and Tatanka. SHAQ is here to participate as well! Shaq and Show chokeslammed Kane, and then took turns tossing goofs like Fandango. After the others had bailed, they all returned and tossed both Shaq and Show after about two-minutes. Once that was done, it broke down into every bland battle royal you’ve ever watched. The Outcasts got some run, and then Corbin got to toss dudes before Kane hit him with the chokeslam. Baron Corbin then tossed Kane to win the match. Baron Corbin won the Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal @ 9:47

– Stephanie was part of Triple H’s entrance, doing her usual bitch queen routine. Triple H came to the ring, no costume, but followed by dudes in skull masks holding title belts. Roman punched the stage and we got fireworks shooting from the Jerry dome.

Champion Triple H vs. Roman Reigns: Roman Reigns is so upset with Triple H that he’s getting out grappled and acting way too calm. Show some fucking emotion, in storyline he fucked you our of the title and broke your damn face, you may want some revenge. The crowd hates Reigns, and so far this is feeling like Triple H vs. Orton at Mania 25, and that’s not good. Stephanie distracted the ref, Triple H kicked Reigns in the balls and got a God like pop for it. Reigns got next to no shine as Triple H took the heat, and he worked over Reigns and attacked the previously inured nose. He then mixed it up and hit a neck breaker on Reigns as Reigns was on the announce table and then placed him in the middle of the ropes and hit a knee off the second rope. This feels like a solid mid-card match 12-minutes in, not the WrestleMania main event. Reigns made a comeback, it was fine. They brawled to the floor, where Reigns slammed Triple H to the steps a few times, but then Triple H fought right back and slammed Reigns to the steps. At the 15 minute mark it dramatically slowed until Reigns hit a spear through the barricade (WWE main event trope #11). They got back to the ring, the crowd chanted for Nakamura as Triple H countered a spear into an arm bar, and then into a rings of Saturn variation. This is not actively bad, it’s just bland with a crowd that wouldn’t give a fuck to save either of these guy’s life. 19-minutes in Triple H is going grapple fuck like he’s working an Evolve main event with Catch Point, NO ONE CARES. I mean, when shit is not working you have to change directions, but they are doing the same shit with no intensity and having Reigns sell, and sell and sell; the issue is no one likes him, so having him babyface for so long kills the crowd. I am not saying that it’s “bad work,” it’s the wrong match and story to try and tell. 22-minutes in and the crowd in largely entertaining themselves. Stephanie pulled out the ref to stop a pin and then distracted the ref. She then got in the ring, which led to Reigns spearing her when Triple H moved. Triple H hit a pedigree for a near fall after that. The spear woke the crowd up as did the near fall. So they kept going, Stephanie handed Triple H a sledgehammer, but Reigns hit two Superman punches and a spear to win. Roman Reigns defeated Champion Triple H @ 27:05 via pin

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WrestleMania 32, WWE, Larry Csonka