The Name on the Marquee: WWF Prime Time Wrestling (5.16.1988)

-Originally aired May 16, 1988.

-Your hosts are…actually, this week appears to be kind of a different show.

-Bobby Heenan shows up at a house in the woods with a group of movers and a bunch of technical equipment. Bobby recaps the entire saga of the new set that he keeps accidentally breaking, and finally he reveals they’re at Gorilla Monsoon’s vacation house to try to coax him out. Bobby reveals that his plan is to tape the entire show as solo host in front of Gorilla’s house, just to shove it in the big guy’s face and show him that “Prime Time Wrestling” doesn’t need him. Bobby shows off how smoothly things are running by introducing this week’s first match, Special Delivery Jones vs. Pete Doherty…

“The Rock” DON MURACO (with Superstar Billy Graham) vs. “Million Dollar Man” TED DIBIASE (with Virgil)
-From Saturday Night’s Main Event. DiBiase attacks immediately and chokes Muraco over the top rope. Series of chops and punches by Muraco. Muraco reverses an Irish whip and backdrops DiBiase. He follows with a forearm and double chops. Turnbuckle shot causes DiBiase to head to the floor for a breather, but Graham gets in DiBiase’s face with his cane out there, so he’s kinda stuck having to run a lap around the ring before he can go back in.

-Shoulderblock by Muraco. Clothesline and a powerslam by Muraco get a near-fall, but Virgil reaches in and puts DiBiase’s foot on the rope. Graham waves his cane at Virgil to ward him off while DiBiase gets in a little offense and gets a two. DiBiase faceplants Muraco and gives him a gutwrench suplex for two.

-DiBiase goes for a backdrop and Muraco counters with a Russian legsweep. Elbow by Muraco and then a powerslam for two (and the referee takes his sweet-ass time getting into position for it). Chops to the throat by Muraco. DiBiase sucker-punches Muraco, then slams him close to the ropes. Muraco gets a foot on the ropes, but the referee ignores it and counts three to give the win to DiBiase. Vince suspects chicanery. Short but energetic.

-Gorilla busts on Bobby for screwing up the show with the very first match, and Bobby blames the technical crew for playing the wrong tape. Bobby drops the bombshell that he’s going to assume Gorilla’s role on the show and that he’s hired Bob Uecker to be his new co-host. Gorilla laughs that off and walks away. Bobby tries to introduce the next match, then realizes that in mid-tantrum, he fired the guy who had his notes for the show.

-Bobby is confused because the format says the next match is Special Delivery Jones vs. Pete Doherty, but that can’t possible be right because that was the first match.

SPECIAL DELIVERY JONES vs. PETE DOHERTY
-From Boston. Hammerlocks are traded as Gorilla pretty much announces straight-up that Doherty sucked so badly on commentary that the WWF has stopped asking him to do it. SD applies a full nelson and Doherty makes the mistake of putting his feet on the top rope to break the hold, so SD lets go and Doherty goes splat on his back. SD keeps him on the mat with a series of holds. Doherty takes over by choking him in the corner. Doherty gets some nice air on an attempted top rope splash, but crashes and burns. Headbutt by SD gets two. Doherty tries going to the top rope again, but SD “flings him around like a piece of pie” (Copyright Gorilla Monsoon). SD makes the mistake of getting into an argument with the referee, and Doherty sneaks over and rolls him up for three. Nothing here.

SPECIAL INTERVIEW WITH CRAIG DEGEORGE
-Craiggers welcomes Ravishing Rick Rude and Bobby Heenan. Jake’s just jealous of Rude, that’s all. Heenan brings out a lady (“and I use the term loosely”) from the crowd for the Rude Awakening. The woman faints at the end, and if memory serves correctly, they stuck with that.

FABULOUS ROUGEAU BROTHERS vs. RICK GANTNER & TONY LEONE
-From Superstars of Wrestling. Raymond starts with Gantner. Gantner gets an early right hand, but Raymond rams him hard into the turnbuckles. Raymond applies a Boston crab, and Jacques runs in and drops a leg onto Gantner in that position. Leone breaks an attempted pinfall, then tags in. We get words from the Rougeaus, who remind us that they love the United States and they want nothing to do with Dino Bravo. Vince vouches for their character.

-Double suplex on Leone. Rougeaus chop him down, and Le Bombe de Rougeaus finishes. And what the hell, they do it to Gantner too. Jesse contends that the second one seemed a little unnecessary and aggressive, and, yeah, even Vince concedes that it was a little strange.

-Bobby rehires the guy with the notes and apologizes profusely.

SCOTT CASEY vs. IRON MIKE SHARPE
-From Boston. Casey armdrags Sharpe around and Iron Mike throws one of his legendary all-over-ringside fits. Test of strength while Gorilla shares the famous story of Iron Mike being locked in the Boston Garden because he spent several hours showering. Casey monkeyflips the big guy and he teases another walk-out before thinking better of it. Sharpe storms back in and begins clubbering with the loaded forearm. They trade two-counts and Casey throws a chop so hard that Iron Mike gets tangled in the ropes. Iron Mike frees himself and they go back and forth until Casey surprises Iron Mike with a crucifix for three. This was okay.

LADIES’ TAG TEAM TITLE: JUMPING BOMB ANGELS (Champions) vs. GLAMOUR GIRLS (with Jimmy Hart)
-From Okay, these two teams have awesome chemistry and I’m happy to watch great matches, but holy shit, get some new opponents. This is turning into the 1988 version of Young Stallions vs. Shadows.

-Judy Martin gets got in the Bomb Angels’ corner and launched across the ring. Lelani reluctantly tags in and gets her arm worked over by Noriyo. Itsuki applies a wristlock and does one of my favorite early Bulldogs spots, hanging onto the wristlock while climbing her opponent’s body like a step ladder to flip her over. Double forearms and a dropkick by Itsuki, and Boston offers some nice Ooooohs and Aaaaaahs for everything. Martin attempts to invent the Attitude Adjustment, but Itsuki lands on her feet and turns it into an abdominal stretch. Itsuki with a delayed gutwrench, and Noriyo comes off the top for a two-count. Kai dazes Itsuki with a shoulder tackle, and Martin unleashes the Moolah offense, flinging her around by the hair.

-Kai and Itsuki slug it out as the commentators STILL haven’t bothered learning the Angels’ names, even now that they’ve made a point to color-code their wrestling gear as help. Judy Martin strangles Itsuki with the tag rope. Noriyo tries to stop her, which gets Dave Hebner weirdly stressed out. “HEY! JESUS CHRIST, WHAT ARE YOU DOING? GET OUT!” Glamour Girls continue beating on Itsuki and go for the finish, but a cute spot sees Noriyo slipping a foot into the ring and booting Hebner’s ass to break his concentration, so he resets the count and it only gets two.

-Martin crashes on an attempted elbow and we have our hot tag. Series of high knees by Tateno on both opponents. Amazing missile dropkick brings all four women into the ring, and a simple backslide gets the win for the Bomb Angels. Good match, but honestly, this should have been the point where Mr. Fuji went to Japan, discovered two new Japanese women, and cut a completely terrible promo about wanting to manage the men’s AND women’s tag team champions, and given us something new.

-Meanwhile, Bob Uecker’s agent keeps hanging up on Bobby Heenan.

EVENT CENTER
-Gene Okerlund miraculously keeps a straight face as he calls the Bam-Bam/Gang match at Wrestlemania IV. We get comments from Slick, who says Gang will make Bam-Bam Bigelow beg for mercaaaaaaayyyy. Mean Gene goes onto say that Strike Force “was jobbed out of the titles at Wrestlemania” and we hear from Strike Force, who want their belts back.

OUTLAW RON BASS vs. BERT CENTENO
-Chyron says Centeno, Bruce Prichard says Centeni, and Howard Finkel says “Centeneaux.” Welcome to the big time, dude. Bert throws dropkicks. Bass sends him over the top rope, and back in, the pedigree finishes quickly.

-With negotiations formally falling through with Bob Uecker’s agent, Bobby offers a “deal” to Gorilla, inviting him to come back to Prime Time as a favor by the Brain.

FRENCHY MARTIN vs. JERRY ALLEN
-Frenchy attacks before the bell with elbows. He keeps up the assult with a chokehold and a series of boots. Allen fights back with a nice standing dropkick and a bodypress from the second rope for two, but Frenchy suckers him into the corner and pins him right away with feet on the ropes. Frenchy plays up being old and blown up as he gets his hand raised, but I don’t get the point here. Frenchy was a full-time manager, got his ass kicked for two minutes, and then got the three-count. What was it leading to?

-Gorilla is on a fishing boat. Bobby commandeers a boat of his own and starts frantically throwing bananas at Gorilla, saying that children are calling USA and wishing their favorite TV star was back on the show. But then Bobby’s massive boat runs out of gas and Gorilla just laughs at him and rows off.

SPECIAL REPORT
-The debuting Sean Mooney recaps the chicanery that allowed the Honky Tonk Man to retain the Intercontinental Title at Wrestlemania IV. Brutus wants revenge. Super.

SPECIAL INTERVIEW
-Craig trolls Dino Bravo and Frenchy Martin by triggering a “USA” chant. Dino Bravo don’t take too kindly to this here Ken Patera fella.

-Bobby Heenan is still trying to restart the boat and doesn’t even notice that Gorilla has gone back to the house. Gorilla answers a phone call from Bruce Prichard and promises to come back to Prime Time as long as Bobby Heenan is kept “on a long leash.” I think you mean a short leash.

EVENT CENTER
-Gene Okerlund announces that Jimmy Hart has been barred from ringside for upcoming Honky/Beefcake matches, but Honky vows that Beefcake won’t stop him from retaining the gold. Mean Gene casually mentions all the money Honky is making from his new restaurant, Honkyburger, in Memphis, then throws it to the Million Dollar Man, who says he wants the WWF Title belt that’s rightfully his. Macho Man goes back to his old bag of tricks, throwing a handful of confetti to start his promo

HULK HOGAN vs. BORIS ZHUKOV (with Slick & Nikolai Volkoff)
-Bolsheviks try an ambush before the bell, but Hulk fights off both of them, clears Nikolai from the ring, and clotheslines Zhukov in the corner. Right hand and a shoulderblock by Hogan. Zhukov gets in a boot and some clubbing blows to the back. Backbreaker by Zhukov gets two, and, yeah, we go right to the finish. Legdrop gets three. Hogan legdrops Volkoff and beats the crap out of Slick after the match to really drive it home.

5.5

The final score: review Not So Good

The 411

The wrestling was a real grab bag, but this is another must-watch for the Gorilla/Heenan fans, particularly this week, which was actually kind of a sweet story, with the two of them slowly, reluctantly realizing that they actually DO kind of like each other just a little bit.