WXW Elite 8 Women’s Tournament 2004

WXW Elite 8 Women’s Tournament 2004

Hello chums! Hope you checked out my Trish DVD review, Trish pretty much rules. I’m thinking about moving to Chicago with some friends in a few months. If any of you Chi-town readers have any advice on good places to work or live, I’d appreciate it. I’m also definitely planning on hitting up some serious IWA Mid South action, that will be a lot of fun. Anyway, this show is a women’s tourney held in New Jersey. Behold:

Announcers backstage hype up the show. Cameraman does that ECW shaky camera thing that will have you wishing you had your sea legs.

Throughout the show DA Bald Guy plays the role of Jerry Lawler OMG BOOBIES! Couldn’t they have put a woman as the color commentator? Like Sherri Martel or something?

~~~~~ROUND 1~~~~~

Amber O’Neil vs. Alere Little Feather:

– Amber with the offense of hair pull… hair pull… Hair pull choke… zzzz

– Alere rallies with some sweet looking chops

– Alere lands a nice looking running bulldog, about 6 minutes in and that’s the first wrestling move. I am wondering if WXW subscribes to the WWE style.

– O’Neil sets up for a piledriver, Alere slides down and turns it into a pin for the win. A little slow but decent-looking spot.

Overall, not much to this. I mean, it was all hairpulls and chops. Amber looked real shaky and off on her timing, maybe she was nervous.

Winner: Alere Little Feather

Ad for an “uncut” WXW beauty pageant. They blur out the women’s chests, but it’s clear they’re wearing bikini tops. 411 writer Steve Cook would send me german spam mail if I didn’t post at least one image of his favorite, Tracy Brooks:

Cindy Rogers vs. Krissy Vaine:

– Cindy Rogers… Holy crap. Cindy Rogers makes her entrance, strutting and posturing in an extremely entertaining way. She’s got this whole anti-authority thing going and it’s pretty awesome.

– Cindy immediately hits some soft forearms to Krissy’s back, then hoists her up for a side mounted CHOKESLAM for two! Crowd was shocked by that, looked like DEATH.

– They do a pin reversal sequence, Krissy has a hard time keeping up though. She at one point MATRIXES OUT but did it slow and it actually looked like she was pinned for a three count.

– Cindy has control for awhile, using some chokes, hairpull takedowns and a sidewalk slam, all of which look great and keep the crowd into it.

– Cindy hits a knee to the face, Krissy sells it with an awesome snap back to the mat. It looks like your standard Stunner-sell, looked great.

– Cindy locks in a dragon sleeper choke… I notice Krissy is supposed to be the face, but the crowd is behind Cindy. Krissy hasn’t done anything to try to garner fan support. Maybe they just assumed she’d get over on her looks. She is good-looking, but has so far not displayed any emotion or persona whatsoever.

– Cindy thinks Krissy tapped, but she got a rope break. Krissy hits THE STROKE! NOOO NOT THE STROKE GOD JARRETT SUCKS and uses her feet on the ropes to ensure the victory. OK, maybe Krissy was supposed to be the heel.

Whoever decided to have Cindy go out in the first round is ON DOPE. She carried this match completely. Definitely want to see more Cindy Rogers stuff. Krissy wasn’t bad but didn’t really do anything notable. She’s pretty, and can be
carried, but that’s about it.

Winner: Krissy Vaine

Lacey vs. Mercedes Martinez:

– Yeah that’s kind of mean. I like Lacey the wrestler but I want to pick on CM Punk as much as possible because I think he’s extremely over-rated as a wrestler.

– Mercedes gets the GOLDBERG ENTRANCE! We see her stretch backstage as guys like Mana and Austin Aries give her last-second pats on the back. She kneels down to pray, then busts through the curtains giving fans an awesome “sit the fuck down” gesture.

– Bald Guy sets himself up for a joke but can’t think of a punch line for the 3rd time so far: “Mercedes puts her spread eagle…” [trails off].

– Mercedes immediately targets Lacey’s knee, and a roll-through into a single leg crab gets a surprised fan to yell “All right!”

– Lacey’s scream-selling is a little too rape-y for my tastes.. yugh…

– Lacey locks in an armbar, Mercedes gets to her feet, HOISTS HER UP and drops her back to the mat, again crowd is shocked at the goodness.

– Lacey tries for a DDT, but Mercedes grabs her injured knee. Mercedes locks in a leg hold for the win. Psychology, for ye who care about it, is present.

Good match. Lacey got beat, period. Mercedes is awesome. Lacey is good in the ring, but I like her much better as a heel. Mercedes is playing a heel but the crowd was behind her anyway.

Winner: Mercedes

Tracy Brooks plugs WXW (commercials on a DVD.. For the company I’m WATCHING?!?!)in a swimming pool. At this point, 411’s Steve Cook would force me to review a Buff Bagwell compilation if I did not provide an image:

We get an ad for the annual WXW supershow (“sportsfest”) and we see clips of past wrestlers who have appeared.. Including BIG DAVE~~~ and The Rock (wearing a “fanny pack”) giving someone a People’s Elbow as D-Lo and Owen Hart look on.

Simply Luscious vs. Allison Danger:

– Bald Guy immediately gives us some insightful analysis, noting that both women have cleavage, and Allison even has “rear cleavage”. Can.. uh.. can someone cut off his mic, please?

– Luscious is having trouble getting over as a heel. She seems like she’s trying too hard somehow.. Her reactions aren’t natural. She tries to get the crowd to chant her name, but they chant for Allison and she throws this pre-planned fit
although the chant wasn’t that big anyway.

– Lots of stiff chops, a few armdrags… Then Allison escapes a dragon suplex attempt and hits her STO for the win.

Short, OK match. Crowd not too into it. Luscious seems like she has skill but is really struggling with the character side of things.

Winner: Allison Danger

Backstage Camera- – Allison walks through the curtain clutching her arm, saying “Tape it up”. Announcers speculate that the arm injury may stop her from advancing.

~~~~~SEMI-FINALS~~~~~

Krissy Vaine vs. Alere Little Feather:

– I see, now Vaine is heeling it up. So that first match, her cheating at the end was intended to shock the fans into booing. Vaine seems like a good heel, gloating her way to the ring.

– Real short match, Krissy dominates with chops and kicks, then Alere steals it with a small package.

Really short. Krissy’s offense is bleh.

Winner: Alere Little Feather

Mercedes Martinez vs. Allison Danger:

– Allison’s arm is all bandaged up.

– Eek, Mercedes jumps Allison at the bell and throws these really soft, ineffective punches and we get a super-close obvious camera angle on that.

– Allison goes for a couple flash pins, but Mercedes kicks out and cinches in an arm lock on the injured arm. Allison taps.

Was less than a minute long. Man, I guess WXW doesn’t want to exhaust the women, but come on, give us some frickin matches with SUBSTANCE.

Winner: Mercedes

WXW Women’s Title Match – Loser must strip – Becky Bayless vs. Talia(c):

– Pretty sad when good female wrestlers are jobbing in opening rounds while the champ can barely wrestle and is in a bra and panties match for the TITLE! But whatever, Talia’s hot and I love me some Becky Bayless.

– Well hot damn… This isn’t bad. Becky Bayless does a La Magistral?? And it looks great! Talia is way over and gets some big chants.

– Becky’s starting to look lost and Talia pretty much takes control immediately and forces her to the mat.

– Bayless goes for a vertical suplex, but barely gets Talia up but it looks good anyway, as Talia goes over low and comes crashing down in a convincing fashion. That looked like it was all Talia.

– Talia hits her “Blonde Bombshell”, a NICE top rope flipping neckbreaker. She covers for the win.

What the?! I heard Talia sucked! But she looked pretty good in this. Becky looked a lot better than the other matches I’ve seen her in (where she looked downright awful). A fun match, nothing earth-shattering, but much better than I expected.

Winner: Talia

– Becky refuses to strip and walks out.

– Talia decides to strip. Don’t worry I got you covered:

I really hope Talia continues to train because she will then be the complete package. I just hope the WWE doesn’t snatch her up too soon because we’ll never get to see her wrestle a match that goes more than 3 minutes. I’d love to see her spend some time under a great trainer like Quackenbush and Skayde or Ian Rotten and Hero or motherfucking Homicide because I seriously think she can be a
big draw in the indies.

~~~~FINALS~~~~~

– Mercedes busts out a butterfly suplex about a minute in, thank god this won’t be a hossy punch-fest.

– Alere hits some spinning headscissors, didn’t look quite right but better than hairpulls, methinks. Mercedes follows up with a NASTY spinebuster, GOOD GAWD! That’s no doofy Austin spinebuster, this is some of that sweet CW Anderson knock-your-teeth-out brutality.

– Alere hits a weird rana where her legs are hooked around Mercedes’ torso. Looked ok, just a little different.

– Mercedes with a SNAPPING elevated neckbreaker, sweet CHRIST!

– Mercedes gets frustrated when Alere kicks out of a pin following a fisherman’s buster. She goes and grabs a chair and slides beck in. Ref takes it away, and Alere gets a quick cradle for the win.

Pretty good match. Mercedes’ offense is insane. Alere kind of hung in there, crowd was very behind her. Best match of the show.

Winner: Alere Little Feather

After, Alere celebrates. All the participants come to ringside. Talia starts talking crap to Alere, a shoving match ensues.

An OK show. Not any standout matches, and frankly not many of the women looked like they belonged in an “elite” tournament. Hell, there’s women in WEW who should’ve been in this, Riptide in particular. This is not the showcase for good women’s wrestling that I wanted it to be. The dumbed-down style actually re-inforces the stereotype that “women can’t wrestle”. If you want to call this
an Elite tourney then you should shell out the dough to get the best women. I hear these women didn’t even get paid. That’s ridiculous. Don’t present this as the best of the best if you aren’t planning on getting the best.

Overall it’s a TWOOOOOOOOOO~~~:( out of five.

Pick this up at RFVideo.com if you can find it in their labyrinthian menu system. Or just copy it off someone else’s DVD. RF made a living off doing that, so why can’t you?