411’s WWE Raw Report 02.19.07

We’re in Bakersfield, California. Tomorrow we’re in San Diego. Hosts this evening are Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler. As much as I’d love to run my normal intro with all the match updates and stuff like that I find that I have no time to do so. Recapping last night’s PPV took me right up close to the show this week. Plus I’m barely awake and it’s nearly 2am. Let’s just roll with it.

TONIGHT – Rob Van Dam v Edge. The winner gets to be in the Money in the Bank match at Wrestlemania. Keep in mind these guys are the two MITB winners thus far. Also tonight is John Cena v Randy Orton. We’re on the Road to Wrestlemania. Just 41 days away.

RIP Mike Awesome. One of my favourite big men ever and another tragic loss for wrestling. Only 42 Mike was always good for entertainment. He could fly like a cruiserweight and sick powerbombs like a heavyweight. His matches with Masato Tanaka and to a lesser extent Hayabusa are among my favourites from FMW. I was hoping he’d make a full comeback after his stellar bout against Tanaka at the first One Night Stand. You’ll be missed, Mike.

LAST WEEK Donald Trump appears on Raw to challenge Vince McMahon to a match at Wrestlemania. Vince barters him down to a “representatives” match with the billionaires hair on the line.

PROMO TIME – Vince McMahon

He has a barbershop set in the ring. He says it’s officially on; the Battle of the Billionaires. He says Donald will be stepping into his house, his yard and his creation; Wrestlemania. He says he’ll beat the holy hell out of Donald Trump after his representative wins, then slap him and shave his head. Vince carries on saying he’ll embarrass Trump like he’s never been embarrassed before. He says baldness is in vogue these days thanks to Britney Spears and pulls out a before & after shot. He says Trump will look grotesque. Vince photoshopped a picture of Trump so we run through some ideas Vince has. He had the Mr T look, the flat top, semi-bald rasta, a Hulk Hogan look or completely bald. He opts for the chromedome. He tells Trump he has one week to name his representative. Vince has his guy lined up right now…UMAGA. Armando Estrada says it’ll be an honour for Umaga to decimate Trump’s representative at Wrestlemania. He says Umaga is about to become Intercontinental champion too and books that match…NOW!

IC title – JEFF HARDY (c) v UMAGA w/Armandro Alejandro Estrada

JIP thanks to a well placed ad break. Last time Jeff faced Umaga he got squished. This time he fares better hitting a few dropkicks through the ropes. He’s caught on a pescado attempt but escapes a posting. He goes for the Railrunner but gets thumbed in the neck on the way down. Back inside Umaga starts throwing knees and headbutts. Umaga drops the leg but doesn’t bother covering. He seems confident he already has this. Jeff gets beaten down some more. Lawler says he lost a hair match and it was horrible and humiliating. Jeff attempts a comeback but gets levelled with a clothesline. Diving headbutt misses because Umaga took too long over it. Umaga misses again in the corner and Jeff hits the stunned Samoan with the Whisper in the Wind for 2. Jeff tries charging again but runs into a Samoan Drop. Estrada is directing traffic out here. Umaga pounds away and Estrada makes sure he doesn’t get himself disqualified. Butt avalanche! Umaga calls for the Spike. Hardy has no defence against it and gets pinned clean at 5.42.

Winner and NEW IC champion: Umaga via pinfall . A reward for Umaga’s hard work in the form of his first championship gold. Umaga looked dominant as per usual and this ended up being just a step up from a squash.

RIC FLAIR/CARLITO w/Torrie Wilson v LANCE CADE/TREVOR MURDOCH

Carlito is teaming with Flair as a respect thing for last week. Apologies to Cade & Murdoch for not mentioning them when discussing the depth of Raw’s tag team scene compared to Smackdown’s last night. Flair runs through some basics on Cade and gets Carlito to tag so they can team on Cade’s arm. Carlito breaks out the springboard back elbow for 2. Murdoch sneaks in a cheap shot allowing Cade to hit the Rock Bottom. Murdoch in to pound on Carlito. The heel team continues to work over Carlito and make tags. The production team focuses more on Torrie’s cleavage. The announcers speculate over the potential future for a Carlito/Flair team. Oh, then it’s tonight only and someone, probably Flair, turns. Flair gets the tag and cleans house with chops. Both heels willingly sell those. Murdoch gets his knee clipped. WOOOO! Cade tries to prevent the Figure Four but in comes Carlito to get rid of him. Flair goes low on Murdoch before strutting a little. Carlito tags back in with the Lungblower on Murdoch at 4.28 for the pin.

Winners: Carlito/Flair via pinfall

POST MATCH Torrie celebrates with the guys. Carlito has “renewed spirit and passion” according to JR. Where’s my heel turn? Nowhere apparently. They just leave. Hmm.

SHILL – Wrestlemania 23. 41 days folks.

BACKSTAGE Todd Grisham interviews both Shawn Michaels and John Cena. The champ says they were successful because they know exactly where they stand. Shawn says he still has Cena’s back because he wants him healthy for Wrestlemania. Shawn wants to get something out of the way right now and moves Grisham. Shawn tells Cena he needs to get…the new DX DVD! Cena then plugs the Marine on DVD also. Shawn makes it into a duelling shill. “John Cena is impervious to bullets”. Shawn feels he’s losing so sics Big Dick Johnson on Cena. The champ freaks out until Shawn superkicks Johnson. “Thanks for having my back” – Cena.

ELSEWHERE Rated RKO point out they have a re-match for the tag titles next week. Orton says he’ll set Cena up tonight. Edge brings up the Money in the Bank ladder match suggesting when he wins this year he could challenge for the title after the main event at Wrestlemania.

CLIPS – Wrestlemania 21. MITB #1. Shelton Benjamin was great but Benoit’s selling was the nuts in that match. Edge wins the match eventually. Wrestlemania 22. MITB #2. Van Dam and Flair star this time around with the frogsplash off the ladder being the highlight before Rob pulls the briefcase down.

MITB #3 qualifier – EDGE v ROB VAN DAM

JR points out Edge has never lost at Wrestlemania and also that both MITB winners went on to become world champions as a result of it. RVD brings some unorthodox countering. Almost British style. Crowd chants for “RVD”. He points at himself. Edge headlocks him but RVD brings the gymnastic drop down and the monkey flip. Edge bails to avoid a spin kick. Ad break! We return with RVD working an armbar. Edge gets out and charges but RVD sidesteps and sending him over the top rope. To the floor and RVD sets up the corkscrew legdrop over the rail. Edge catches him with a neckbreaker through the ropes coming back in. Crowd is still chanting “RVD”. Edge points at himself to mock the ECW Original. Edge with another neckbreaker for 2. Edge works a chinlock for a while but RVD kicks his way out of it. RVD with a great spinning heel kick into the corner. This turns into a slugfest, which RVD wins with his superior striking. Edge gets a thrust kick under the jaw then runs into a spin kick as well. He goes for Rolling Thunder but Edge pops up and counters into a powerslam for 2. Crowd is still chanting “RVD”. They’ve missed his unorthodox style. Edge gets dumped on the ropes and RVD spin kicks him off. RVD follows out with a pescado. Back inside RVD goes up top but gets met with a dropkick on the way down for 2. Edge sets for the spear but RVD jumps over it. They counter in the corner and RVD kicks Edge in the face again. Split legged moonsault gets 2. RVD backrolls out of the corner and hits the step through heel kick. RVD goes up. Orton is out here but RVD sidekicks him too. SPEAR~! Edge gets the pin at 13.30 to win a spot in the MITB match.

Winner: Edge via pinfall . Great match. RVD’s style is so different it’s easy to miss someone like that on Raw where a lot of guys work similar styles. *** easy, probably ***1/2. The booking is a surprise with Edge going into a 6-way again at Mania with an unbeaten streak on the line.

Women’s title – MICKIE JAMES (c) v MELINA PEREZ

Mickie is starting to get the big girly pop. They’ve subtley changed her fanbase. Hair pulling to start. Mickie grabs a headlock but Melina counters into the hammerlock. Melina with kicks but she runs into a clothesline. Mickie gets Melina in the seated dropkick then boots her outside too. Melina catches the baseball slide though and drags Mickie out of the ring. Back inside Melina knees the back. Hair mare gets 2. Melina yanks away at the hair then kicks at the fallen Mickie. Those sounded pretty solid. Mickie double legs her and that leads to a CATFIGHT. Mickie wins that with punches. This is getting pretty stiff. Mickie with knees but Melina throws punches again. Mickie with the Thesz press and fists of fire. Melina covers up through most of that. Mickiecanrana is blocked using the ropes. Melina with a Jacknife pin at 4.22 and she takes the belt!

Winner and NEW women’s champion: Melina via pinfall . Two new champions in one show? It’s Russoesque. The replay shows that Melina didn’t cheat in the slightest. I wonder if she was supposed to?

BACKSTAGE The other divas console Mickie as Todd Grisham tries to get an interview. She freaks out and slaps him.

HIGHLANDERS v GREAT KHALI

This would be a handicap match. Not sure who the McAllister’s pissed off to deserve this. They attack Khali as he enters the ring. Khali shrugs it off and starts throwing headbutts. Rory gets the overhand chop, which sends him flying outside. Khali roars in celebration. Robbie gets the chokebomb. Khali pins with one foot at 1.31.

Winner: Great Khali via pinfall . Not sure what that achieves. We already know Khali is unstoppable. Who did the Highlanders piss off to get so destroyed?

RINGSIDE – the cast of Grindhouse. Well, some of the cast.

EARLIER – Vince showed some funny pictures of Donald Trump before selecting Umaga as his representative.

BACKSTAGE Kenny tries to get onto Wrestlemania by asking Coach. Khali turns up to scare him off though. He rants at Coach that he wants better competition. Coach looks terrified. Ron Simmons pops in to say “damn”. Coach concurs. I get to see the Ashley Playboy cover unveiling off Smackdown, which was edited off the UK version because they don’t like product placement involving adult magazines. It’s out on March 12th.

ELSEWHERE Todd tries to interview Melina but Johnny Nitro runs in to tell her the limo is ready. Wait, that isn’t Todd. Nevermind. Melina bitches about Ashley and Playboy. She says Playboy begged her to pose but people don’t deserve to see her.

HALL OF FAME – Dusty Rhodes was in last week. This week we discover inductee #2…MR PERFECT, CURT HENNIG. Good choice. It’s just a pity he’s being inducted posthumously. Odd how they don’t show any of his AWA stuff. Larry Hennig talks about how Curt became Mr Perfect when he went to New York. He really was that good at everything. Flair says Hennig had athleticism and charisma.

BACKSTAGE John Cena walks.

WRESTLEMANIA RECALL – Wrestlemania I. Just clips of the whole thing.

NEXT WEEK – Donald Trump names his pick for representative, Rated RKO v Cena/HBK for the tag titles.

JOHN CENA v RANDY ORTON

Couple of collar and elbow tie up’s to start before Orton refuses a clean break and wails on his ribs. Cena reverses a whip and hits the fisherman suplex for 2. Orton thumbs him in the eye but Cena comes back with the flying hip toss. Orton comes back again with a clothesline for 2. Very back and forth in the early going. Cena with a bulldog and Orton bails. Cena rolls him back in but that leads to a double clothesline spot. Orton bails again, this time looking for a chair as we head into an ad break. Here’s an ad for you: gayest product, ever . Pink camo hardly screams hetero. We return with Cena stuck in a chinlock. During the break Orton ran Cena into the ring steps. Orton ducks the flying shoulderblock. Orton hooks Cena’s feet on the middle rope and drives him down with a DDT for 2. Orton was slack on how quickly he covered. He pounds away in the corner and beats Cena down. Orton with the Garvin Stomp. Orton with a measured kneedrop for 2. Chinlock and Cena tries for the ropes but can’t get them. Cena lifts Orton up to try and carry him to the ropes but can’t get there. Cena ends up powering out of the chinlock so Orton punches him for a while. Cena starts no selling and turns it into a slugfest. Clotheslines and the flying shoulderblock. Protobomb. Orton can’t see him. Five Knuckle Shuffle. Marine salute. He goes for the FU but Orton goes to the eyes and hits a dropkick. Cena rolls through a crossbody for 2. Orton with the round the backbreaker though. Orton stalks for the RKO. Cena sees it coming and shoves Orton off. FU is lined up in runs Edge for the spear at 13.04.

Winner: John Cena via DQ .

POST MATCH Edge wants the Conchairto to set up a tag title win next week. But out comes SHAWN MICHAELS. He ducks a chair shot and cleans house. Chair shots for Rated RKO. He teases giving Cena one for good measure and Cena is certainly wary of it but Shawn puts it down. “Not this time” mouths Shawn. Cena looks the other way and Shawn thinks about the superkick a couple of times. Great teasing.