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411’s TNA Impact Report 10.30.08

October 30, 2008 | Posted by Larry Csonka


In HD where available…

TNA Impact Begins…NOW!
-Tenay and West welcome us to the show and run down the card.

-I like the changes to the Impact Zone.

~THE TNA ORIGINALS SPEAK~

AJ and Joe make their way out to the ring to kick off the show. AJ says that he is glad Mick Foley is here, but with all do respect, thanks but no thanks. They will fight this war on their own. He has been here for 6-years and has watched this company grow from Nashville to here in Orlando. He has grown along with the company, but as they grow so do the talent. Sting, Nash, Angle and Booker T. Maybe they have forgotten, but three of those guys caused a company to go out of business. This is not about the Main Event Mafia; this is about TNA growing. Last week they grew to HD and went to Vegas. Joe and AJ also got bloodied up in HD. What bothered AJ is that some of the guys in the back that are like family to him didn’t come out and do a damn thing. He knows what they are going through. They haven’t had the main event. You have to take what you want, not wait for it. He asks who has the balls to come and stand with he and Joe.

Jay Lethal is the first to make his way to the ring, followed by Petey, Creed, ODB and Eric Young. ODB could likely take all of them. Joe now says he appreciates them coming out, but before he can continue the Motor City Machine Guns make their way to the ring. Shelley says the sheep came out to be brainwashed by Joe. They aren’t biting, and they say that Joe needs to sell them on why they should fight. Joe then says it is their war, and you are either in or out. Joe also says listen and look in his eyes, this is about all of their futures in the ring and it is in their best interests to fight against the people that have kept them out of the main event. Shelley says they won’t bits and that Joe doesn’t care about any of them. Shelley says Joe hasn’t done anything for him, so Joe slaps him.

The music for the Main Event Mafia hits and they come out to the stage. Angle says that they (in the ring) are a disgrace to themselves, the business, TNA and all of the fans that paid money to see the MEM. Angle then says that THEY are the family here, and they are the mafia, the Main Event Mafia. 75-years of experience that demands respect. They didn’t ask for the war, they just wanted a thank you. Nash then says that he tried to teach Joe how to act towards the stars, but all Joe did was spit in his face. He then says Hall didn’t show up that night because Joe wasn’t worth giving the rub too, and Nash now agrees. If they want a war, they got a war. Booker now has the mic and says to look at the bums, how they dress. In his country if you look and cluck like a chicken, it is a chicken. If you talk about the MEM, you do it to their face and the war will begin here tonight. By the end of the year, there will be none of them left. It is ALL about the FIVE. It’s all about the FIVE.

-JB is with Jarrett backstage, and Jarrett says AJ and Joe are ready for the war and will fight it themselves. Foley is here and apparently he has something to say tonight, and he will say it to Sting tonight. Jarrett then says he has to go take a Kurt. Foley tells JB that Sting is an investment and he needs to keep it on line.

-Lauren is with The Beautiful People and Cute Kip. They remind her that they are in HD and make fun of Lauren’s looks. Next they mock Hemme and ask when she became a wrestler. Hemme should stick to the pages of Playboy with her fake boobs and BOTOX doggy face. Unless she wants a makeover, which they will gladly help her with. Sky asks of ODB is a DUDE or a TRANNY! TREMENDOUS! Just because ODB OD’D on Ugly Pills doesn’t make them the bad girls, it isn’t their fault that they are beautiful; they were just born that way.

Christy Hemme and ODB vs. The Beautiful People (Love and Sky) w/Cute Kip

Sky and Hemme to begin. Sky slams her down, lays the boots to her and then gets a side headlock. Hemme escapes, gets a leg trip and then an arm bar. Tag to ODB, double ax smash and Love tags in. Drop toehold by ODB, a shoulder block and then a cover for 2. ODB works the arm, tag to Hemme and she works the arm. Love with the forearm, Sky kicks her and then stun guns her off the ropes. Spinkick by Love, she then slams he head off of the mat repeatedly and then tags in Sky. Double team elbow drop to Hemme and then Sky chokes her out. Sky with kicks to Hemme, tags in Love and she sends Hemme to the corner, but then eats a big boot. They trade shots, off the ropes and they charge, collide and grab the hair and take each other down. Tags to Sky and ODB, clotheslines by ODB, to the corner and a corner breast press to Sky. Sack of shit slam, kip up, RUSTY TROMBONE CELEBRATION! Powerslam to Sky and that gets 2 as Love breaks it up. Hemme tosses Love, and then doves off of the apron onto Kip, who catches her. ODB then gets a wedgie-assisted rock bottom to Sky for the win.

Winner: ODB and Christy Hemme @ 5:00 via pin

  • Not bad at all. Hemme and Sky hurt things a bit, but ODB and Love were there to work.
    RATING: *¾

    -Lauren is with the Machine Guns. They go to meet Joe and say they need to start over. The only way to progress is to move forward. They understand what he is trying to do and say that they are in. Joe says he has trust issues, so when the shots are fired, he’ll see if the “Guns” are firing back.

    -JB is with Eric Young. He has been there in TNA for 5-years, and there is a lot on the line right now. He says Kurt hurt his friends last week, and tonight he shows us who the real Eric Young is.

    James Storm w/Robert Roode and Miss Jackie vs. Eric Young

    Young charges the ring and we’re underway. Rights to Storm, and he beats his down in the corner. A whip, reversal and float over by Young. A dropkick to Storm follows, another and as Young sends Storm to the apron, Storm gets an Enziguri and Young is down. Roode beats him down a bit and then rolls him back in. A hangman’s DDT by Storm follows, BEER, MONEY, and a chinlock follows. Young escapes, but eats a great high knee from Storm. Whirly bird by Storm and a cover for 2. Jackie distracts the ref, Roode spits beer but Storm takes it. A roll up by Young and that is all!

    Winner: Eric Young @ 2:30 via pin

  • Fine for the time given, but it was just too damn short. I do like Young’s new intensity, he’s always been a good worker for the company and can go.
    RATING: *½

    -After the match Beer Money beats down Young, but the Guns are now out to make the save! They clear the ring and then help Young to his feet.

    -Lauren walks with Roxxi and Wilde. They are looking for Kong, Roxxi doesn’t give a F/CK what Lauren wants. YEAH! THAT’S A HARDCORE BEOTCH!

    -Tenay says to go to TNAwrestling.com and SPIKE’s website for some political mumbo jumbo.

    -Who Is Suicide?

    -West and Tenay talk up the new set and the move to HD.

    -JB is with Kong and Saeed. SILENCE! But before they can talk, Wilde and Roxxi rush the locker room and beat down Kong and Saeed. Kong gets laid out on the small snack table.

    -TNA X-Division Champion Sheik Abdul Bashir comes to the announce table for some enlightened commentary.

    -Tanahashi’s hair is FABU!

    Tanahashi and Volador vs. The Motor City Machineguns (Alex Shelley and Chris Sabin)

    Tanahashi and Volador attack before the bell. Swank dive to the floor by Volador, Tanahashi and Alex battle in the corner and Volador flies in with the big leg drop. Double team lung blower by Tanahashi and Volador gets 2.Kicks and forearms by Tanahashi, off the ropes and a flying forearm by Tanahashi, back splash and senton follow for 2. Body shots by Tanahashi, wipes the sweat off on Alex, who fights back. Dragon Sleeper by Tanahashi, fights off Sabin and then lays the boots to Alex. Tags to Volador, powerbomb to Alex and then misses the lionsault. Tanahashi in to stop the tag, to the floor with Alex and Sabin in. He runs wild on both Tanahashi and Volador. Tanahashi to the floor, corner elbow to Volador and then gets a springboard clothesline for 2. Alex with the plancha onto Tanahashi, Volador with the superkick to Sabin. To the corner, double kicks to Volador….DOUBLE STOMP/CRADLE SJOCK COMBO and that is all!

    Winners: The Motor City Machineguns @ 7:00 via pin

  • A great little TV match that accomplished exactly what it should have and that was to show off the talents of all four guys and get the Guns a win. Volador and Tanahashi can stay in TNA forever with no complaints from me.
    RATING: ***

    -Bashir is PISSED that Tanahashi and Volador lost the match. He heads into the ring and puts the bad mouth on them. Rhino sneaks in and GORE, GORE, GORE to Bashir.

    -Lauren is with Christian Cage. He is here to accept the stipulation for the Legend’s Title match. Booker just invented the title and never beat anyone for it. He doesn’t need or want to pick a side, even if he wanted too, it wouldn’t be the MEM. Booker calls himself a legend but doesn’t know who he is. Cage will always be the champ, and he will take the title at Turning Point, and stay on HIS side.

    AJ Styles and Samoa Joe vs. Kevin Nash and Booker T

    AJ and Nash to begin. AJ with the go behind, Nash gets the ropes and they break. Nash plays with AJ a bit, delivers knees and clubbing shots to the back. Rights by Nash, AJ fires back and then dropkicks the knee. Hits Booker, to the apron and then a springboard dropkick to Nash. SUICIDE DIVE by Joe to Booker! We’ll head to a commercial @ 1:30.

    Back from commercial @ 5:30 and Joe delivers jabs to Nash. He then chokes him out, delivers head butts and Nash is down. Forearms by Joe, chops, off the ropes and a back elbow by Nash. Tag to Booker, chops to Joe and Joe then fires back. Knees by Booker after an eye poke, but Joe gets a shoulder block, Joe hits the ropes and Nash nails Joe. AX KICK by Booker and AJ in to stop that. Nash in and drops elbows to Joe and covers for 2. Side slam by Nash and another cover for 2. Tag to Booker, rights to the ribs of Joe and then a whip, sidekick by Booker and a cover for 2. Booker works the top wristlock, elbows by Joe and then a high kick by Booker. Tag back to Nash and an elbow drop on Joe. Nash corner offense follows, backs off and Booker chokes out Joe and delivers rights as AJ tries to get into the ring. Booker in and a snap mare and chinlock follows. Joe fights to his feet, boot by Booker and then Joe gets the snap slam. BOTH men are down and need a tag. AJ tagged din and cleans house on the MEM. A whip to Booker, to the apron and a springboard Superman forearm! Enziguri to Nash! Flying arm bar on Booker! Nash breaks that up. Nash tells Booker to hold AJ, he does and Joe is in and gets the choke on Nash! Booker breaks the up, tosses Joe and PELE by AJ to Booker! 1…2…3!

    Winners: AJ Styles and Samoa Joe @ 12:00 via pin

  • Not great and slow at times, but a serviceable match with the right decision.
    RATING: **

    -Some of the young stars come out to celebrate with AJ and Joe.

    -Lauren is with Abyss and Morgan. Abyss says thanks for asking how he is, he is just fine, a flesh wound. Morgan debates this and says he was set on fire. Morgan says he wasn’t mentally in the match with Angle and it cost him. He says Abyss is not ready for the match and he isn’t allowed to be out there. Abyss says no shit Sherlock, he has not forgot what Angle did to him; he felt it and it didn’t feel good. He then laughs.

    -Tenay and West discuss what has happened thus far tonight.

    -We get a video package on the stars of TNA. Cross the Line.

    -And now we get a video recap of the end of last week’s Impact and Foley’s declaration.

    -JB is with Real Estate Steve. They talk about the meeting with Foley, and Real Estate Steve says that no one has told him that Foley is officially his boss. He will go into the meeting with an open mind, and hopes that Foley doesn’t close it.

    ~FOLEY and REAL ESTATE STEVE…TOGETHER AGAIN~

    Foley puts over the new Impact Zone, and says it looks pretty damn good. And with one week on the job, big dividends are being paid. He reminds us to vote, and then says to tell their friends about TNA in HD. As the executive shareholder, he is announcing two main events for Turning Point. The first is Nash vs. Joe. The second is Sting defending the TNA title against AJ Styles. Speaking of the champion, he politely asks Sting to come to the ring.

    Sting, in suit, comes to the ring to meet with Foley. Foley says this seems strange since this is the first time in 14-years that they have been face to face. He says Sting put him on the map in 1991. Not many people heard of Cactus jack until they blazed their way hardcore style onto the National Scene. Foley respects him, but says it was difficult to see him with the MEM. Why Sting Why? Foley doesn’t need a lecture, but TNA is on the verge of something big. All of the pieces are there. They have AJ, Joe, the X-Division and the way he sees it, with Sting as the champion and a man that enjoys respect, he is the glue that holds it all together. But you are not acting like glue; you are a wedge. What do you have to say? Sting wanted to be the glue, they have the same intentions. But Joe, AJ and others rejected what he had to say. Sting says Foley respects Funk, and that is missing here in TNA. That next generation will eventually get in Foley’s face and disrespect him as well. They agree to do what they have to do here in TNA, and Sting then says this is NOT Foley’s war, it is his.

    -JB is with Angle, who shoves him away and says JJ is hiding behind Abyss. Angle will go through every talent until only JJ is left. Angle always gets what he wants, gold medal, WWE, WCW and TNA champion. He wants JJ in the ring, and he will go where he needs to get JJ, and JJ knows he is capable of anything.

    Turning Point Card:
    *The Motor City Machine Guns vs. Beer Money
    *Grudge Match: Sheik Abdul Bashir vs. Rhino
    *TNA Legend’s Title Match: Booker T © vs. Christian Cage
    *Kevin Nash vs. Samoa Joe
    *TNA World Title Match: Sting © vs. AJ Styles

    Kurt Angle vs. Abyss

    They circle, Angle backs off and goes to the apron. Angle back in, Abyss shoots him off the ropes and gets a tackle. Abyss shoves him back down, rights and lefts to Angle and then the ref separates them. Off the ropes and a clothesline by Abyss and Angle to the floor. Abyss follows as Angle walks away and they brawl up the ramp. Rights by Abyss, rolls Angle back in the ring and then Angle attacks the knee of Abyss. Off the ropes and Abyss with a side slam and cover for 2. Abyss then clothesline Angle to the floor. Angle tries to escape through the crowd, Abyss follows and we head to a commercial @ 3:00.

    Back from commercial @ 6:00 as they continue to brawl in the crowd. Angle gets whipped to the wall. They brawl back to the ring; Angle then attacks the knee of Abyss and then tries to soften him up. Angle in control and mocks Abyss a bit and then continues to clip the knee of the big man. Angle charges Abyss, who gets a double thrust to the throat and takes Angle down. Rights by Angle now, Abyss does not approve of this, fires up and then gets a big boot on Angle. Rights by Abyss, corner clothesline follows and then the shock treatment by Abyss! 1…2…NO! Abyss calls for the chokeslam, Angle counters it, rolls through and gets the ankle lock! Abyss escapes and then chokeslams Angle! 1…2…NO! Angle back to the knee, ANGLE SLAM! 1…2…NO! Angle goes up top now and Abyss POWERBOMBS him off of the top! 1…2…NO! Abyss thought it was three, argues with the ref as Angle then gets a chair. NAILS Abyss and we actually get a DQ~!

    Winner: Abyss @ 12:00 via DQ

  • They were having a damn fine match here, Angle and Abyss have a chemistry that just works for them. Abyss’ not selling the leg down the stretch hurt things in my opinion.
    RATING: ***

    -Back in the ring, straps down and the ankle lock by Angle on Abyss. Abyss escapes, and Angle attacks the burns on the back of Abyss! Ankle lock again by Angle, and Matt Morgan is out. He works over Angle, Carbon Footprint by Morgan! Booker and Nash rush the ring, Nash has a chair and Nash lays out Morgan with the chair. Nash nails Abyss as well! Nash chokes out Abyss with the chair and Joe, AJ and the young guns army are now out! But SCOTT STEINER IS BACK! PIPE SHOTS FOR ALL! Nash, Booker and Angle are back in and they continue to destroy the young guns. Sting now makes his way to the ring, picks up AJ who spits in his face and Sting drops him with the scorpion death drop. DON’T FUCK WITH REAL ESTATE STEVE! The Main Event Mafia stands tall.

    *End scene.

    *Mick Foley will be the guest on the spiketv website’s post Impact show.

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    Larry Csonka
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