411’s TNA Impact Report 7.19.07

TNA Impact Begins…NOW!

-We get a Victory Road video package to kick off the show.

-Tenay and West welcome us to the show.

-JB is in the back and is here to talk to Kurt Angle. Angle doesn’t let him in, but he goes in and Kurt is tanning. He tells JB that Cornette knows where to find him and that he is busy. He then accuses JB is looking at his junk. He dismisses JB, and says Cornette can come to him; this is part of his maintenance package. Damn it’s great to be Kurt Angle.

Serotonin (Raven, Havoc and Martyr) vs. XXX (Daniels, Skipper and Senshi)

Havoc and Elix to begin. Daniels jumps in and beats down Havoc and Elix to the apron. STO by Daniels. He works over Martyr, and then Raven hits Daniels with the cane. Havoc and Martyr in control of Daniels, doomsday suplex gets 2 for Serotonin. Knees by Martyr to Daniels, to the corner and they work Daniels over. Slam by Martyr, Havoc in and stomps by Havoc. Snap suplex and a cover for 2. Raven tags in and lays the knees to Daniels. Tag back to Havoc and uppercuts to Daniels. Martyr tags in and Daniels fights back with rights. Knees by Martyr, and then Elix flies in with a spinkick and Daniels gets the tag. Senshi in and cleans house. Spring kick to Martyr. Raven lays him out, but Senshi back with a sweet kick. Havoc and Martyr go for a double team and Elix saves him, Daniels tosses Raven. All three members of XXX up top! LEG DROP by Elix! BME by Daniels! WARRORS WAY by Senshi! 1…2…3. Havoc is dead! Shit, the crowd went wild there.

Winners: XXX @ 3:45 via pin

-Kaz is out with a cane and works over Serotonin! He escapes as the numbers start to get to him and Raven is not pleased.

-JB is there with Angle again, he was looking at Angle’s ass. Cornette says get to the office or he will fine him $10,000. Uh oh. All of Angle’s titles and clothes are gone. He asks JB is he is wearing his underwear, and JB says he doesn’t wear any. Angle appreciates him free balling and leaves.

-Leticia is with Cage and the coalition. He says he will pin Chris Harris again tonight. Storm is with them and talks Spanish. Tomko is there with a title belt. It is his IWGP tag title belt, and they make no mention of it.

-Brother Ray is out and tells everyone to shut up. Devon is there as well. He has something to say. They know damn well that the Steiner’s aren’t there, but are watching. Last week at the PPV Rick and Scott ruined their night. One of the greatest night’s of their career. They cost them the TNA tag titles. They demand the Steiner’s show up next week and see if Scott has the nuts to get over his little injury and face them. Devon chokes out Tenay for talking. West begs off and Ray grabs him. Ray grabs the bell hammer and security is out.

-Angle is walking around in his speed-o and looking for his stuff. He enters the locker room as we head to a commercial.

-Angle is having a locker room meeting. He is pissed and he sees a lot of mid-card guys and main event wanna bee’s. He sees truck drivers and 7-11 workers, but not his stuff. He wants then back or there will be hell to pay. He asks Sharky what he is smiling at and then brats him down in flip-flops and a speed-o. Tremendous.

Kip James w/BG James Roxxi Laveaux vs. Lance Hoyt w/Hemme

BG is on commentary. Kip nails Kip with a right and then beats him down. Roxxi is apparently the real Voodoo Queen and descendant of Marie Laveaux. Dropkick by Kip and Kip to the floor. To the floor and Kip tosses Kip into the steel post. BG puts over Kip as a great athlete, but he turned on them and will get pay back. Rights to Kip and Hoyt covers for 2. Off the ropes and a Thesz Press by Kip. Elbow drop and a cover for 2. BG talks trash to 3D on commentary. Kip misses a corner splash, but misses a boot. Fameasser and that is all for Hoyt.

Winner: Kip James @ 2:30 via pin

-Hemme in the ring and tries to low blow Kip, blocked and Roxxi is in now. Boot and Dominator to Hemme. BG calls it the bimbo plant.

-Leticia is with Joe and all of his titles. Tonight he makes the biggest challenge ever in TNA. But we’ll have to wait to find out what it is.

-Back from commercial and Angle is having a meeting with the production people. He says he will beat up anyone if they cross him. He knows they don’t make a lot of money, but if they stole it is wrong. He will turn his back and count to 10 and wants to see his stuff when he turns back around. Some dude gets pissed and tries to leave and Angle leaps off the table and attacks him! He then places him in a chair and uppercuts him out of it.

Rhino and Chris Harris vs. James Storm w/Jackie Moore and Christian Cage w/Tomko

Harris attacks Cage at the bell and goes to work. Thesz Press and lefts by Harris. Rhino tags in and rights to Cage. A shoulder block and then chases Storm away. Chops by Cage, Irish whip and a clothesline by Rhino. Flapjack by Rhino and a cover for 2. Cage manages a tag to Storm and Rhino is up and chases Storm to the floor. Cage leaps off the steps and lays out Rhino. We head to a commercial @ 1:35.

Back from commercial @ 5:05 and Cage is beating down Rhino in the corner. Spinkick by Cage and a cover for 2. Tag to Storm and he chokes out Rhino and then kicks him in the head. Rights by Storm and now Tenay says the Steiner’s will be here next week to confront Team 3D. Storm chokes out Rhino, tag to Cage and they set Rhino up top. Cage up and Storm underneath for a tower of doom. Rhino clotheslines Cage off of Storm! Rhino crawls and tags Harris! He and Storm go at it and a lariat by Harris! Cage in and a bulldog by Harris to Cage! Full Nelson slam to Storm gets 2. Atomic drop and Rhino tosses Cage. Spear by Harris and a belly to belly by Rhino on Storm! Gore try…Cage pulls Rhino out and Harris then nails Cage. Superkick stopped and a Catatonic flubbed on Storm and Tomko pulls out the ref. Rhodes is here and KILSL Harris with a chair shot. Storm covers and that’s all.

Winners: Storm and Cage @ 8:55 via pin

-Rhino back in and attacks Cage and Storm. Jackie in and tries to pull Rhino off and Rhino grabs her and goes for a press slam, broken up by Tomko’s big boot. Cage tells Storm to get the beer and they get beers and toast and drink, and go to pour it on Rhino, but Abyss is here! He chases them off and Sting is here and low blows Cage with the bat and tosses him to Abyss. Abyss goes for the black hole slam and Cage manages to escape. Abyss chases him through the crowd.

-JB is with Angle and Cornette. Cornette says he cannot go out in front of the crowd like this and give shim a robe. He also wants the 10-grand by Monday.

-Back from commercial and Cage is running. He is looking for AJ and the car. AJ says he has a truck and Roode is now here. Roode says he will take care of Abyss. AJ then says he will take care of it. Cage tells Roode to find Tomko and deal with it and AJ says he gets to ride with Cage. AJ then asks what music he wants to listen to and Cage says anything but country. Abyss is in the truck and they run. That was rather humorous actually.

-Angle and his bathrobe make their way to the ring. Angle says he has a sense of humor and likes pranks. This was good he has to admit. That’s a good one, and he questioned all the employees and he cannot seem to find his stuff. So if anyone is going to steal his stuff, it would have to be one of the idiot fans that would want to ebay his underwear for $2000! He will beat asses until he finds his stuff, he’ll take them all on!

-Samoa Joe makes his way to the ring now. He has ALL of the gold and Angle’s stuff! Oh Kurt…now Kurt, rest assured I am no thief, I came here to put the past behind them. He and Kurt fought hard and were bloody and beaten and went to war. But now, he wants to start the next chapter. This stuff belongs to you Kurt. I give you those titles back because we both want to know who is the best in the world. Kurt, by all of this gold in the ring, we are the two best in the world today. Here’s your suit, and I don’t have your underwear, you came with that speed-o on. So, the past is the past, and at Hard Justice, Joe vs. Angle one more time. The last time we did this for pride and respect, but now we do it for ALL of the gold! Now I have one question, in or are you IN! Angle thinks about it and shakes on it. They hug…and Joe raises his hand and HEAD BUTTS him! Joe starts to beat his ass! Big elbow by Joe. Joe now goes for a table! He places the table in the ring and then nails Angle with the mic and steals his robe. Joe sets it in the corner and grabs Angle, Angle escapes and slams Joe through the table! ANKLE LOCK~! Angle figure fours the leg as we fade…

-We get the closing video and that is the show.

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