411’s WWE Raw Report 11.26.07

411’s Raw Report 11.26.07

Ric Flair’s last stand…maybe

Ok, I’ve had approximately no sleep for the last 3 days. Or is it 2 days? I’m not even sure. I just know that going to bed at 4am ceases to work for me when I’m up at 6am. I have worrying levels of insomnia right now and it’s because I know I can’t wind down until Wednesday when I get a day off. So here I am up at 2am and I’ll still be up at gone 4am. I love wrestling.

We’re in Charlotte, North Carolina. Hosts are Jim Ross & Jerry Lawler.

On tap for this evening’s show;

• Triple H & Jeff Hardy v Umaga/Gene Snitsky. This kicks off Raw tonight so don’t be late!
• Mickie James v Melina Perez. Mickie is on a “winning streak” according to WWE.com. The winner of this match, hopefully a no brainer, faces Beth Phoenix at Armageddon.
• We get fallout from Chris Jericho’s return last week on Raw and presumably some form of receipt from champ Randy Orton.
• Ric Flair returns in his “home town” (I put that in quotes because he was born in Minneapolis) and has an important announcement regarding his future. One would surmise at least. Rumour suggests it has to do with either his retirement or the angle that leads up to Wrestlemania and with all probability his retirement and/or induction into the Hall of Fame.

We open with clips of Randy Orton’s attempt to do a torch passing ceremony to himself last week until he was interupted by the dramatic return of Chris Jericho. I still say it would have been better without it being so obvious and Jericho not looking so stupid in that sparkly waistcoat but still, Jericho is better than no Jericho.

Sidenote – I REALLY miss Torrie Wilson shaking her ass to the Raw theme music in the credits sequence. Can we have that back in? It was in time and everything.

Triple H/Jeff Hardy v Umaga/Gene Snitsky

We start out with our “main event” – JR. HHH’s chest is really starting to look quite leathery. Jeff is looking pretty clean bar the fake tan. Hardy starts with Snitsky thus allowing the crowd to get a friendly support chant going. Jeff figures HHH is better to match up with him though and tags out. Snitsky overpowers HHH but HHH sidesteps him on a charge and grabs the arm. Now Jeff comes back in as Lawler points out Snitsky has never lost on Raw. Is that actually true? I’m sure he lost to Kane at least once. Snitsky gets tossed outside and Jeff hits a dive.

AD BREAK!

We return with Hardy battling Umaga and is caught in timely fashion by the badass wind up release urinage. I LOVE THAT. Snitsky tags in and hits a suplex for 2. We get two replays of Umaga throwing Jeff around. Nice to see everyone digs that move. Umaga back in to kick the hell out of Jeff for 2. Snitsky back in and he sets for the pumphandle but Jeff gets out and dropkicks him into the buckles. That wasn’t his fault. Jeff crawls across but Snitsky cuts him off to prevent the hot tag but Jeff kicks him off and gets the tag. That wasn’t his fault either! HHH cleans house and Umaga sells the buckles huge and the ring post even more before kicking out of a lateral press with AUTHORATAH. HHH opts for a spinebuster instead. Pedigree is set but Snitsky jumps in there, which is enough distraction for Umaga to kick HHH in the head. Hot tag to Jeff but Umaga smacks him right in the face. HHH brawls into the crowd with Snitsky. Umaga is all set for the buttalanche but HHH saves. Whisper in the Wind (again called the Twist of Fate by JR). HHH in with the Pedigree and the Swanton bomb finishes on Umaga.

Winners: HHH & Jeff Hardy via pinfall

POST MATCH William Regal comes out to talk about the next PPV Armageddon. He’d like to see both winners in action. So he books Triple H v Jeff Hardy. None title. HHH instigates a staredown with his future opponent.

BACKSTAGE Ric Flair arrives! He’s rockin’ the pinstripe suit and polka dot tie combo. With a pink shirt. Daring!

PROMO TIME – Ric Flair. He’s coming straight out here. We’re in Flair Country. He already looks quite emotional. “As usual you’re too kind”. He talks about why he chose his hometown to make an announcement. He says they’ve been “so good to me”. He looks to be close to tears now. Lots of “Woooo’s” in the crowd. Signs and shouting. He says thank you to all the people who’ve watched him over the years. He talks about how he’s not been on Raw in 6 months because his career can’t go on forever. He talks about his future and how he’s into politics and marketing. He says sooner or later he’ll have to retire. He compares himself to Cal Ripken Jr and Brett Favre. He decides to announce he’ll NEVER RETIRE. “I’ll only retire when I’m dead in this ring”. He says he’s got too much juice left and off comes the jacket. This brings out Vince McMahon complete with his usual ridiculously over the top walk. Limbs flailing away. Vince passes the pinstripe jacket back to Naitch. Vince says he’s happy because Flair is good property. Vince makes some cryptic comments about how Flair has to keep on winning. He tells Flair the first match he loses will be his last match. Charlotte wants Ric to kick his ass. But we’re not done because out comes WWE champion Randall K. Orton Esq. He looks humble and thanks Ric for all the advice his gave him and how he was a good friend. Orton continues to put him over until pointing out Flair is going to have his last match tonight…against Randy Orton. Vince makes it official; Orton v Flair. If Flair loses his career is over.

Cody Rhodes/Hardcore Holly/Super Crazy/Jim Duggan v Lance Cade/Trevor Murdoch/Highlanders

Crowd chants “USA” presumably to support Duggan whose tag partner is Mexican. Although to be fair they still have more Americans than on the other side of the ring. Rory gets picked off early and worked over briefly becafore Cody lets him escape. Cade comes in to work over Cody’s arm. Murdoch is on the same page and the champs show good continuity working the body part. Murdoch gets run into the post to allow a tag to Bobcore. Robbie is in as well and stands no chance. Bob with his patented dropkick but then everyone spills in for a big brawl. Holly with his punt to the guts and a spinning Alabamaslam finishes.

Winners: Rhodes/Holly/Crazy/Duggan via pinfall

BACKSTAGE Todd Grisham wants Jeff Hardy’s thoughts on facing HHH. He says it’s an honour but they’ve been on a roll lately and have had a good bond and wants them to be friends. Awww. Bless. HHH shows up mid-interview to say he’s not good with the whole friendship thing. He says he’s turned on everyone he’s ever teamed with. He says come Armagedddon Jeffy is stepping in the ring with the Game.

CLIPS We see Mr Kennedy interupting HBK last week. A brawl followed.

BACKSTAGE Kennedy talks about Shawn’s new DVD; Heartbreak & Triumph. Kennedy shills it saying it’s “chock full”. He talks about Shawn turning on people and losing all the time. Kennedy once again makes fun of the “losing my smile” incident. He says the DVD is full of whining and politics claiming he held down more hungry and talented individuals. Kennedy says the biggest low of Shawn’s career will be when he loses to Mr Kennedy.

ELSEWHERE Flair talks to Arn Anderson and Barry Windham. No sound.

PROMO TIME – Chris Jericho. New PIMP~! SaveUs gear for Jericho. Kind of Matrix-like. Why not wear that last week instead of that stupid vest? He calls this the Second Coming of Y2J. He claims his sole reason for returning is to save the world from Randy Orton and win the title. He says everyone knows Jericho wants a title shot and yet he’s heard nothing back from Orton all week. He says Orton is too stupid to understand his request last week. “He has the IQ of a kumquat”. “Me want title match”. He has visuals aids in case Orton doesn’t get it. ‘Want’ is represented by Elmo and a cookie, which is genius. He’s going to hang around and wait for Orton’s response. The response comes in the form of Santino Marella. He calls Jericho “KYJ”. He says things have changed since Jericho was last here, sneaking in a shot at Jericho’s “Lindsay Lohan haircut”. “I’m sorry, who are you?” Jericho repeatedly gets Santino’s name wrong in a nice comedy bit. Marella says he doesn’t deserve a title match. He says he could beat Jericho up right now. Jericho says “ok, beat me up”. Jericho wants a ref. Santino says he’s a finely tuned athlete so he needs to do some stretches backstage and get a massage but instead dives over the announce table and wails on Jerry Lawler.

Chris Jericho v Santino Marella

This is Jericho’s first match in over 2 years. Lawler is rather upset. Jericho starts with basics and works a headlock. Santino isn’t happy so Jericho punches and chops him. Both looked good. Vertical suplex. Jericho thumbs the eye for his own amusement. Marella bails so Jericho can do his springboard dropkick to knock him off the apron. Jericho with a punt to the ribs. A dropkick misses though when Marella holds the ropes. This gives Santino an offensive opening. He wails away looking a little shaky. Nice back suplex follows though. Need to work on the strikes sir! Jericho comes back in short order hitting a bulldog. He poses to set up a LUNGBLOWER TO THE FACE. Yikes! New finisher anyone?

Winner: Chris Jericho via pinfall

POST MATCH Jericho invites Lawler in to get himself a receipt while Jericho takes over on commentary. The commentary gets a touch goofy with Jericho shouting “Lawler, Lawler, Lawler, bah gawd”. Jericho watches the replays naming his finisher the “Codebreaker”.

BACKSTAGE Shawn Michaels goes to see Ric Flair. He says he doesn’t want to see Flair’s career ever end. He warns Flair that Orton is on a roll. HBK brings the inspirational speech calling Flair the “one and only legend” this industry will ever have. He says Orton can’t beat the man. Flair says he’ll give Shawn everything he has and worse case scenario he’ll go out in a blaze of glory and I actually tear up at the use of the words. That segment was like something out of a film.

Brian Kendrick v Mr Kennedy

Kendrick starts fast and instigates some nice chaining but Kennedy slaps him down. Kennedy catapults him into the underside of the bottom rope. Flatliner, and a violent one at that, finishes in short order.

Winner: Mr Kennedy via pinfall

POST MATCH Kennedy announces he’ll be wrestling Shawn at Armageddon. Duh. He says Mr Kennedy will be winning that match.

Kennedy.

SMACKDOWN REBOUND – Vickie Guerrero gets on Edge’s case for ruining the finish of Taker-Batista @ Survivor Series. Vickie’s punishment is to put Edge in a title match next week on Smackdown against Batista. Edge thanks Vickie for her help. Good lord, they made out on TV? What fucktard booked that?

BACKSTAGE Vince chats to his bastard Hornswoggle. He says Finlay believes in luck because he’s Irish and Hornswoggle is a lephrechaun so he’s lucky. Which is why Khali didn’t kill him. Vince thinks Finlay wants to fight Khali at Armageddon so he books it. He orders Hornswoggle to go get him an ice cream sammich. We follow Hornswoggle as he searches for some ice cold treats and gets suckered into a room marked “free ice cream sandwiches”, which Carlito is in. Hornswoggle pulls out a can of spraypaint and draws himself a door in the wall, which he then runs through freaking Carlito out. Carlito, being an idiot, tries it himself and is knocked down. Ron Simmons arrives. “Damn”. Multiple camera shots here so it was pre-recorded.

BACKSTAGE Melina and her cleavage walk. Can I get another damn, Ron?

#1 Contender’s match – Melina Perez v Mickie James

Beth Phoenix is out here to check it out. Mickie is looking super-hot here. Just ridiculously out of this world good. Melina sure is smiling a lot of late. As it once was I’d rather this match was for the title and on the PPV. Melina throws forearms and kicks while the camera watches Beth. Mickie spinning back kicks Melina in the gut. Melina tries to come off the top but gets that wish when Mickie throws her off. Miss Thesz press and fists of fire from Mickie. Melina gets a cheeky roll up for 2. Mickiecanarana. Mickie with kicks and the Screaming DDT finishes this in short order. Where’s the Long Kiss Goodnight?? I’m outraged.

Winner: Mickie James via pinfall . Mickie now gets a title shot at Armageddon.

BACKSTAGE Ric Flair walks and gets applauded by the locker room. HHH hugs him. “Show them who you are”. This feels like Rocky. I’m genuinely into it.

Randy Orton v Ric Flair

If Orton wins then Flair has to retire. Lawler talks about the lack of fear & doubt in Flair’s eyes. The atmosphere is weird. Hard to put my finger on what it is. The crowd are certainly thrilled to get Flair here. He chops away in the corner and stomps on Orton’s face. More chops~! Orton turns it around and punches Flair down in the corner. Big forearm uppercut gets 2. Flair gets a sneaky inside cradle for 2. Orton cuts him back down with a clothesline. Flair chops him off again. Orton with the Garvin Stomp. Flair knows about that move! “Naitcha boy” – Charlotte. Orton misses a kneedrop. OOOOOH! Foreshadowing! Orton with a dropkick for 2. Standing dropkick gets 2. I’d rather they told the story with the knee a little more there with Randy feeling uncertain about it and needing to take time. Instead of hitting two straight dropkicks. Flair chops him away again but Orton clotheslines him over the top. When Orton follows he gets chopped himself. Flair gets suplexed on the floor. Geez. He’s only 58 Randy! Flair nearly gets counted out. Orton legdrops him for 2. Flair knows about that move too. Orton goes to a headlock for a little chat. Flair back suplexes out. Orton tries for the RKO but Flair pushes him off into more chops. Flair clips the knee, twice. Orton is in trouble here. Bad knee and the Figure Four available. Flair chops into a shinbreaker. FIGURE FOUR!!!! It’s on! Orton is desperate for the ropes. Flair isn’t strong enough to hold him clear and Orton grabs the bottom strand. Flair tries to get it back on but gets caught in the RKO. Orton’s knee hurts too much to get a pin though. Flair is left in trouble and down but he’s close enough to grab the rope. Orton pummels away and the ref warns him. Crowd is very animated in their support of Flair now although it’s strange because they suddenly go dead every now and again. Orton wants the RKO again and uses the cravat to set up for it. JERICHO runs out here and it’s enough distraction to move the ref. Flair goes low and rolls up Orton for the win. Flair’s career continues!

Winner: Ric Flair via pinfall .

POST MATCH Orton eyeballs Jericho as he stands on the ramp. Challenge…extended.

That’s the show. I’ll be back in 7 days with my final live Raw (at least for a while). After that I’ll be handing back over to my original replacement. Funny how things work out. Read my reviews on the tape section. Lots of good stuff coming up including PWG, old NWA, Smoky and 1PW.