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411’s WWE Smackdown Report 12.19.08

December 19, 2008 | Posted by Alexander Miezin

Welcome to 411’s WWE Smackdown Report for 12.19.2008. My name is Alexander Miezin and this is my first report for 411. I have been a fan of this site since it first began, and I have been a fan of Pro Wrestling since the ripe age of 2. I am a 21 year old college student with the intelligence of a sheep. Baa. I would like to give a quick shout-out to the WWE Misc. Section and Bad Boy Mike Del of the EWA. I would like to thank the 411 team for this opportunity, and without further wait, let’s jump into the show!

From Baltimore, Maryland

We get a recap of Jeff Hardy‘s epic WWE Championship victory from Sunday at Armageddon. It was a monumental moment in terms of the McMahon’s trust in my opinion and an even bigger moment in the career of Jeff Hardy.

They show Jeff Hardy holding the WWE Championship with new face paint and the new Jeff Hardy nameplate on the WWE title on the Titantron as Jeff Hardy says, “Here I come!”

Smackdown’s intro airs next and I notice a new theme song right away. Sounds kind of like AC/DC. They show Josh Roberts in the ring as he welcomes the NEW WWE Champion Jeff Hardy! Confetti flies everywhere as Jeff receives an amazing ovation, either dubbed in or not, the crowd looks very hot tonight for Jeff Hardy. Pyro and fireworks shoot off everywhere as Jeff shows the WWE title off to at each ring post with pyro and fireworks going off at each one. Ross and Tazz are quiet and are letting Jeff have his moment in the ring with the fans screaming and white confetti absolutely everywhere! Truly a great moment, almost reminiscent of Chris Benoit, yeah I typed his name, and Eddie Guerrero‘s WrestleMania XX moment.

Jeff Hardy grabs the mic and tells everyone that, “it finally happened!”. He states that the WWE is about to change. He does a little two-step around the ring as the crowd cheers. He said it represents the World’s screw-ups and rejects. He tells everyone, even the people at home, to, “Stand up and get a little crazy!”. Wow, I feel like I’m watching Elmo again. Edge comes to the ring in an angry fashion pacing back and forth. Edge claims that Jeff got lucky and had one good day. Edge says representing the WWE is about sacrifice and destiny is just a cop-out. Edge claims he was WWE Champion for one reason and it was hardwork. Jeff Hardy comes back with, “Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar”. The crowd starts chanting it as well. This is hilarious. Edge claims to be better than Jeff Hardy and he has always outperformed him. Edge says that Vickie Guerrero made two matches for tonight. The first one being, the ECW Champion Matt Hardy will be facing Edge, and the second bout will be the new WWE Champion Jeff Hardy will be wrestling the undefeated Vladimir Kozlov! Edge calls Jeff a screw-up, and Hardy retaliates with a Twist of Fate and leaves the ring! How perverted.

Hurricane Helms/R-Truth -VS- United States Champion Shelton Benjamin/MVP

We are informed that next week, Shelton Benjamin will be defending the United States Championship against Hurricane Helms. Ross calls it a, “Main Event”. Hardly an overstatement. R-Truth does his entrance through the crowd and the little kiddies eat it up. Helms is in the ring dancing and waving his arm in the air. Greatness. Helms looks to be a bit out of shape since returning, but it’s semi-understandable. R-Truth has his Slammy in his hand. Helms is the best part of R-Truth’s entrance tonight. Simple hilarious. R-Truth and MVP begin the match. R-Truth goes for a quick roll-up followed by armdrags and a bodyslam. Helms tags in and targets teh arm. MVP is called the Detroit Lions of the WWE. Helms looks like Paul Burchill when he did the pirate gimmick. MVP comes back a bit and drop toeholds Helms into the mat. Shelton tags in and Helms chops him. Benjamin retaliates, but is quickly caught with an armdrag. R-Truth tags in and suplexes Shelton for a one count. Samoan Drop connects for Shelton to get a one count, odd. MVP wants the tag, but Shelton won’t tag him. Shelton Benjamin puts the boots and punches to R-Truth. R-Truth is then flipped into the corner and put into a variation of a headlock. Tazz and Ross continue to talk about the upcoming bouts later on in the evening completely ignoring what is going on in the ring. R-Truth fights his way to his feet, dodges a splash in the corner, and gets slammed by Benjamin in the center of the ring. Helms tags in and Benjamin stares at MVP refusing to tag him in. Hurricane Helms goes to work on Shelton. Helms hits a crossbody and MVP breaks up the pin attempt. Shelton tosses R-Truth to the floor as all four were in the ring. Helms tries a backslide and MVP runs in and misses Helms and hits Shelton with the big boot. Helms drops Benjamin, covers and gets the win at around the 5 minute mark. *1/2 Basic match here. Nothing we haven’t seen one jillion times before.

Chavo Guerrero and Vickie are shown backstage talking. Vickie complains about the coffee Chavo brewed for her and she slaps it in his face. What a pig! Edge comes in acting like a lunatic. Vickie says that tonight Edge will deal with Jeff’s big brother.

Festus with Jesse -VS- World Tag Team Champion John Morrison with The Miz

Okay, what the heck is with the RAW World Tag Team Champions being on Smackdown? I understand they are from ECW, but isn’t ECW taped with RAW now? This is just stupid. Just combine the two tag titles, unifiy them, and get it over with. Honestly, Carlito and Primo aren’t even on the show every week. Jesse attacks the Miz on the floor as he goes for the bell. The bell sounds and Festus goes into pervert mode and attacks Morrison. Bodyslam by Festus. Morrison tries dodging Festus for a bit and finally snaps Festus’ throat on the top rope. Morrison hits a running knee right into Festus’ face for a two count. Morrison goes into a seated full nelson, not even two minutes into the match. Festus fights out and hits a corkscrew elbow on Morrison. Morrison rallies back, but gets caught with a fall away slam then an inverted Military Press slam. Jess swings the bell at Miz on the floor and accidentally hits the ring post sending Festus into stupid-mode. Morrison hits his finisher and wins the match at the 2 minute mark. Really? Two minutes? Wow. 1/4*Wasn’t really even a match. WAY too short. Morrison pulls Miz’s pinky and he farts on Festus. Are they serious? More fart jokes? Miz then gets a fake pin on Festus with Morrison counting. I’m still shocked at the farting. It seems like someone in the WWE farted on this match by giving it two minutes. Morrison surfs on top of Festus.

The DX commercial airs again. Must’ve taped them all in the same day because Shawn Michaels still has the bandage over his eye. These commercials are somewhat humorous. Triple H and HBK compare their IC title reigns. They chop each other back and forth. Shawn mentions the 2002 Summerslam match. They still continue to chop each other. Triple H makes a hair comment and they begin “choking” each other. This stuff is pretty good. It’s just too bad the 2006 DX was horrible.

We get a look at the city of Baltimore. Home of the Orioles, Ravens, and known as the armpit of the United States. Eve Torres interviews Matt Hardy and asks him what it was like seeing his little brother win the WWE Championship at Armageddon. Matt says that Edge was embarrassed and he will do what his brother did, and defeat Edge.

Non-Title: ECW Champion Matt Hardy -VS- Edge

Matt enters first with the ECW title draped across his shoulder. They show a little fat kid dressed up in Hardy attire going absolutely nuts. Personally, I’m looking forward to this battle. Bell sounds and we’re underway. They lock up and Edge powers Matthew into the corner and goes for a punch and misses. Crowd starts clapping for absolutely no reason. They lock up again and Edge goes for a go behind and Matt powers out into an armlock into a drop toehold by Edge. Matt works on the left arm of Edge and he scurries to the ropes forcing the break. Crowd is dead silent now. Edge powers Hardy into the corner again and Matt bops him one. Edge falls and just stares at Matt Hardy. Drop toehold by Matt into a headlock. Rest holds less than two minutes into the match, welcome to the new WWE Age. Edge runs off the ropes and is thrown over the top ropes as we head to a commercial break. We’re back as Edge is still being dominated by Matt Hardy. Matt continues to work the left arm. Good psychology here. Jim Ross says that this match has the Revenge Factor. Edge goes to work on Matt and throws him to the floor. Edge hits a baseball slide and goes to the floor to continue the attack, He tosses Hardy chest first into the steel steps. Matt Hardy makes the count and rolls back into the ring only to be met by the boots of the Rated R Superstar. Edge goes to work on Matt Hardy’s arm now. Crowd still silent. Matt tries fighting back only to be perched on the middle rope and slammed to the canvas for a two count. Matt fights back again and misses a Side Effect, but was countered into an armbar takedown. Edge stomps Matt as the referee pushes him away. Matt kicks Edge in the chest and starts fighting back, but is hit with a Ricky Steamboat type armdrag back onto the canvas. Some kid in the front row has a sign that says, “Smilez”. Well here you go ya stupid chap . . . :). Matt counters out and back suplexes Edge. Swinging neckbreaker by Matt Hardy. Matt goes to the top ropes. Matt hits a moonsault onto Edge for a close two count! What a move! Someone moon me! Matt Hardy goes for a Twist of Fate, but is drilled and Edge gets a two count. Great back and forth action here. Crowd still not reacting though. Edge goes off the middle rope and is booted in the chest and Matt hits the Side Effect for a two count as Edge’s bottom foot reaches the ropes to break the fall. Matt jumps off the top ropes and they trade covers for two near falls then a double clothesline in the middle of the ring! Edge goes for a spear, but is countered. Matt Hardy tries a Twist of Fate again, but is thrown shoulder first into the ringpost, speared, then pinned at around the 11 minute mark. **3/4 Good match. Solid back and forth action and good psychology. I just don’t like how they are burying the ECW Champion.

We head to a commercial break.

We’re back and they plug the Hardy/Kozlov match.

WWE Tag Team Champion Carlito with Primo -VS- Ezekiel Jackson with THE Brian Kendrick

Ezekiel is in red trunks tonight and looks like a pudgy Ahmed Johnson. Ezekiel powers Carlito into the corner and is booted in the face. Carlito stomps on Kendrick’s hands and dropkicks Ezekiel. Carlito then runs full speed right into Ezekiel and Ezekiel is on the offense. Bodyslam by Ezekiel followed by a vicious bearhug. Yay! Carltio tries fighting out, but to no avail. Carlito fights out and they exchange punches before Ezekiel just clotheslines Carlito to the canvas. Carlito rolls to the floor and Kendrick goes for the Sliced Bread #2 off the apron, but is thrown to the floor. Primo attacks TBK. Carlito hits a crossbody off the top rope for a two count. Carlito springs off the middle rope, but Ezekiel clubs him in the back. Modified chokeslam by Ezekiel gets the pin at the near 4 minute mark. Sucks for Carlito, but Kendrick is the best thing on Smackdown. Take him out of the tag division please!1/4* It was what it was, and that’s not saying much.

We head to another solid commercial break and are back with Michelle McCool strutting her stuff in leather pants. I thought she was a heel now? She takes a seat next to the announcer’s table to watch this #1 Contenders match.

#1 Contenders Match for the Divas Championship: Maria -VS- Maryse

Battle of the Mar’s here. Maria gets a solid pop as she enters. McCool is sitting down smiling. I thought these two didn’t like each other? Maryse, the best Women’s Wrestler on Smackdown today enters next. This should be an absolute war, and by war I mean snore. Maryse, who can barely speak English, attempts to talk trash to Maria, but is slapped in the face and mounted. They end up on the floor somehow, and Maryse botches a clothesline. Solid. Reverse Russian Legsweep follows and Maryse is starting to dominate this war between these two Divas. McCool still at ringside with the Butterfly Belt. Maria doesn’t belong in a wrestling ring. Maryse has a Camel Clutch applied to Maria for a bit, and Maria gets up and escapes. Clotheslines by Maria. Maryse fights back with elbows. Maria stupidly dives off the top rope and misses. Jim Ross quietly laughs then goes silent. Maryse with the DDT finishes it at about the 3 minute mark. Thank you.* Maryse carried this match. Maryse goes up to McCool following the match. I truly enjoy Maryse’s theme. They keep playing it, and I keep smiling. Maryse keeps making hand gestures and things at McCool, but doesn’t speak. Probably because she doesn’t know how to.

MVP is shown backstage and Mr. Kennedy sits next to him. Kennedy tells MVP that he feels for him. He mentions the New Year and January is coming. MVP then says that Kennedy is just going to talk about his movie and how it would change MVP’s life. Great way to plug a DVD release. Kennedy says MVP is flat broke, but is still giving. I’m calling MVP to win the Royal Rumble match right now. Call me stupid, but it will happen.

We go to commercial as Vladimir Kozlov vs. Jeff Hardy is NEXT! The RAW Rebound is shown with Orton wanting a rematch with Batista. Orton slaps him and baits him on the ramp and the Legacy attacks Batista. Cena makes the save. Blah. Blah. Blah. Recap of the Cena/Batista vs. Legacy match is shown with Orton punting Batista in the head.

Jim Ross says that Batista has suffered a concussion and they don’t know when he’ll be back. They say he likely won’t be participating Monday on RAW.

Eve Torres is with The Great Khali backstage. They show Khali’s Kiss Cam with Mae Young from Armageddon. Oh man this was awful. Why must I relive it again? Why?! WHY!?! Singh says that The Great Khali has found his soul mate in Mae Young. Man, this is just perverted. I like it.

Non-Title: WWE Champion Jeff Hardy -VS- Vladimir Kozlov

Just typing WWE Champion Jeff Hardy feels odd. Hopefully it won’t last. We go to commercial as soon as Kozlov makes his entrance. Jeff’s music hits and the kiddies pop like crazy. Bell sounds and the match begins. These two have met before, but never with Jeff as WWE Champion. Kozlov armdrags Jeff to the mat. Jeff gets up and starts clapping. The crowd gets into it. Kozlov takes Jeff to the mat and slams him for a go behind. Hardy fights out and they are both to their feet. Hardy throws wild punches then is shoulder blocked by Kozlov. I swear every match tonight has started the same. Kozlov tosses Hardy to the floor. Sound familiar? Sheesh. Kozlov is baited to the floor, and Hardy goes to the inside and baseball slides through the middle rope and kicks Kozlov in the gut. We head to commercial again. This match is almost exactly like Matt Hardy vs. Edge from earlier tonight. We’re back with Kozlov hammering away. Kozlov throws Hardy shoulder first on the mat into the ringpost. Kozlov drags him off and slams his knees to the canvas. 1..2..kickout. Into a keylock type maneuver by Kozlov. Jeff Hardy looks to be in trouble here. Kids are starting to get scared. Jeff fights his way to his feet and runs off the ropes and jumps right into Kozlov’s arms and is slammed to the mat for a very close two count. Kozlov is so one-dimensional. Vladimir continues to attack the left arm of Jeff Hardy. Did someone accidentally give Kozlov and Jeff the same script as Matt and Edge? Seems like it. Kozlov headbutts Jeff Hardy a couple times and hits a belly-to-bellt suplex for a two count. Kozlov shoulders Hardy back into the corner. Kozlov charges and misses. Jeff Hardy barely hits a Whisper in the Wind, and another one. He covers Kozlov. Edge runs in and breaks up the fall causing a Disqualification at about the 7 minute mark.1/2* Kozlov holds Jeff as Edge slugs away. They show Triple H backstage making his way to the ring. Edge grabs a steel chair and slides back into the ring. Kozlov is still beating on Jeff Hardy. Triple H’s music hits. He storms to the ring. Edge swings the chair, misses, and is hit with a Pedigree. Triple H tackles and pounds away at Kozlov. Kozlov rolls to the floor, but is tackled by Triple H and beaten down all over the outside of the ring. Triple H rolls Kozlov into the ring and grabs a Sledgehammer. Kozlov runs away and heads up with ramp with Triple H charging after. Meanwhile, in the ring Jeff Hardy hits a Swanton Bomb on Edge! Jeff Hady and Triple H give each other a quick stare as Jeff celebrates in the ring with the WWE title as the show ends.

Overall Thoughts: Throwaway show. Nothing good was on this show outside of a mediocre match between Matt Hardy and Edge. So, we still have Edge, Triple H, Kozlov, and Jeff Hardy in the title picture. Still no Undertaker or Big Show, disappointing.

Thanks for reading my first ever report here with 411! Hopefully many more to come! If you want to contact me via e-mail, you can at: [email protected]

Merry Christmas to everyone as well! Everyone have a SAFE Holiday!

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Alexander Miezin

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