wrestling / TV Reports
Acero’s AEW Dynamite Review 6.28.23
Image Credit: AEW
Loading...Y’all, I only watched about half of Forbidden Door, but certainly read it…right here..ON 411MANIA DOT COM!
It’s Wednesday, you know what that means…
NO! SLEEP! FOR MOXLEY! He’s in action the minute the clock strikes 5:00!
It looks like the door is still open, because he’s in action against Ishii next.
Jon Moxley vs Tomohiro Ishii
Chop city to start the match!
About forty seconds later, they go for some shoulder tackles with neither besting the other. Ishii misses a kick, drops, and ducks a running kick from Moxley. They trade forearms in the center of the ring. Ishii out the corner with a tackle drops Moxley. Moxley with a spinning kick to the gut then he bites the nose of Ishii. Ishii returns with a bite of his own. Another tackle, this time Jon gets the better of it. Moxley sends Ishii outside.
The music of Eddie Kingston hits and he comes runnin out. He grabs a chair and looks to enter the ring. Yuta tries to stop him then runs away. Jon leaves the ring. Eddie drops the chair and tells Jon to worry about his opponent.
WE are BACK and Moxley is seated on the top rope. Ishii climbs, locks the head and hits a superplex off the top! Ishii covers, 1..2….NO!!! Ishii hits the ropes, Jon blocks a right, Ishii hits a left. They go back and forth with more elbows over and over until they slow and the crowd applauds. Jon is cut on his left side of the face, but they wont stop. Ishii with a left and a right this time, Jon spins, and hits a hard right, and both men are down. Jon grabs Ishii, locks the arm up, drives some elbows into the side of the face of Ishii. Over and over and over and over. Ishii with a middle finger!!! Moxley with a choke! He pulls up with the choke, Ishii looking like a pimple ready to pop. SAITO SUPLEX FROM ISHII!!!! But here comes Jon with a German! King Kong Lariat! Cover! 1…NO!!!! AWWW SHIIIIIT. Jon with a knee! Cover! 1….NO!!!! Running knee! 1…NO!!!! These dudes are CRAZY! Double clothesline in the middle, and both men drop.
Eddie and Claudio are staring a hole into each other, neither blinking, not even paying attention to the match.
Ishii and Moxley are head to head, butting on the floor. Moxley is still very much cut. They go back and forth and it looks like Ishii may be busted open, too! Chop! Ishii with a headbutt to the chin, he hits the ropes! DDT TO ISHII!!!! COVER!! 1….2…..NO!!! MOXLEY IS BUSTED OPEN!! Double underhook, tries for Death Rider, Ishii ducks underneath and HITS HIS OWN PARADIGM SHIFT!!! KING KONG LARIAT TO MOXLEY!!! COVER! 1…2….NO!!!! DIAMOND CUTTER FROM MOXLEY!! Ah shit, Ishii up at 1!!! Clothesline. He wants a brainbuster, Moxley slinks off, knee.
DEATH RIDER! Jon doesn’t cover right away. He covers. 1..2…….NO!!!! Enziguri from Ishii! STOMP FROM MOXLEY! DEATH RIDER! COVER! 1…….2….3!!!
Winner: Jon Moxley
I was soooo ready to complain, talking about how the forearm party was a bit much, and we’ve seen it all before, but then they upped the ante and went balls to the wall with the crazy. Like good god, this was PPV-worthy. Good shit.
Total Rating: ****
Match Time: 15:16
Jon Moxley walks out of the ring, shoulder checks Eddie Kingston and heads back up the ramp. He turns as Eddie applauds him for doing it by himself.
Renee is backstage with, and here comes Adam Cole in a black SUV. He hops out the back seat and here comes a high speed red Ford. It’s MJF! says he wishes he thought of the whole sick excuse. He says he and Cole got off on the wrong page. This is a big chance for Cole. He wasn’t good enough to win the title, but no one is on his level, but if anyone is close, it’s Cole. So just imagine what they can do as a unit, a team. They can run the entire company. So, he has an idea. This weekend, he and Cole hang out. A couple bros.
Cole tells MJF sure, why not. Cole wants to say hello to a few people, but will see MJF around. MJF has a gift for Cole.
MJF has merch; a shirt that reads: “Better than you BAY BAY!”
Backstage, Renee is with her hubby, and she is PISSED! She yells at Moxley, asking what’s up with him and Eddie. Here comes Eddie to argue with Jon a bit before Renee goes all crazy wife on him and tells Eddie he better fix this because she is DONE!
Video package covering Kenny and Will’s match at Forbidden Door. Keny says it’s not over, he’ll be back, and Will says any time.
A short video of Orange in the back finding his two partners is just…great.
Orange Cassidy, El Hijo Del Vikingo, and Keith Lee vs Matt Menard, Angelo Parker, and Daniel Garcia
Vikingo and Garcia to start. Vikingo goes full Spiderman, side steps Garcia, whip to the corner, Viking spins onto the apron, to the top rope, bounces off the second and arm drags Garcia. Rope work and Vikingo with a rana. Tag from Parker. OC with a tag. Parker raises his new comb, and combs his hair. OC grabs the arm, works Parker down, grabs the comb and….folds it, then puts it in his pocket. In comes Menard to clothesline, OC ducks, and Matt hits Angelo. Kick from OC and Parker stuffs Menard in the corner. Running dropkick to Parker, Tag to Garcia. OC combs his hair~!
Here comes Garcia to rip the comb out of his hand and tosss it to Angelo. Garcia works the arm, whip to OC, Oc grabs the leg, Vikingo gets a tag. OC with a bow and arrow, Vikingo flies off the top with a stomp. Running shooting star press. Dropkick to Angelo on the apron. Menard pulls Vikingo off the apron and presses his face into the apron. Garcia with a running kick to the face.
Menard is in off th tag. He works the arm, tags in Angelo, who comes in with an axe to the arm.
We are BACK and VIkingo is stuck between the legs of Menard, who lfits him for a powerbomb. He hits it, and hits it hard. Lord. Menard whips Vikingo into the corner, tags in Garcia, who gets tossed into the corner, then Parker, who tosses Vikingo into a drop toe hold. Big elbow and a cover for 1..2.NO!!!! Menard and Parker knock OC off the apron. They try to do the same to Lee, but Lee doesn’t move. Vikingo hops over both men, tag to Lee. Lee catapults himself over the top rope onto Menard and Parker! Clothesline ot Garcia, forearm to Menard, another to Parker, lifts Garcia, who dances. Lol. Menard and Parker attack the back of Lee. Garcia stands on the back of Lee and…>DANCES!!! Lol. Lee presses himself and lifts Garcia onto his shoulders, hits a clothesline to Menard and Parker. Garcia elbows Lee, Lee grabs him by the head and chops the soul out of him with a double chop. VIkingo is legal, high kick in the corner.
VIKINGO WITH A HUGE DIVE OVER THE TOP ROPE BUT KEITH LEE IS THERE TO….I think catch him? Ah shit.
Lee lifts up Vikingo, and it seems like he’s going to powerbomb him, but instead he uses him as a battering ram into Menard and Parker. Lee launches Vikingo onto the apron, who gives a high five to OC. Is that a tag? VIkingo moonsaults onto Menard and Parker outsidw! OC tries for an Orange Punch, but Garcia with a powerbomb! Cover! 1..2..NO!!! Crucifix pin for 1…2NO!!! Beach Break from OC, but Garcia with a Dragon Tamer! In comes Vikingo with a superkick! Parker is in and sends VIkingo over th top rope. ORANGE PUNCH TO PARKER! Tag to Lee! He misses a right, Menard with a chop, another, another.
Menard tries to clothesline Lee down once, again, a third gets him a fireman’s. Elbow to Lee’s face. Lee drops down springs back up, Menard keeps with the elbows! SUPER NOVA! Cover for 1..2…3!!!
Winners: Orange Cassidy, Keith Lee, and Vikingo
Oh what fun it is to be a fan of Cassidy!!!
Total Rating: *****
Match Time: 13:15
The Elite are backstage. Hangman Page talks about tonight and their open challenge.
Here comes…The Dark Order
Matt Jackson tells them to chill, they’re live and rolling. He ignores them and starts the interview all over again, but Johnny Silver cuts Matt off, tells him they want in. Page misunderstands, saying maybe they can do a 6 on 6 if they’re down, but Alex Reynolds says no, they want to FIGHT! This upsets Evil Uno who goes off on Page, mocking his apology. Page asks if he thought that he Page was supposed to babysit them the entire time. Reynolds says they are no longer friends, and tonight, they are their opponents.
Renee is backstage with Chris Jericho and Sammy Guevara. Jericho is tapping into The Painmaker. Jericho says for the first time ever, Sting and Jericho were in the ring together. This is bigger, though. Jericho and Sting should be on TBS. Should be commentated by Tony Schiavone, just like it should have been years ago. Sting knows about being dark. Tonight, Sting is facing The Painmaker. Wanna get dirty, Sting? Let’s get dirty. Let’s put that white paint in the dirt till it comes up a bloody mess.
The Dark Order vs The Elite
We are starting with Reynolds and Nic. Reynolds rolls Nick up for a 2. Alex works the arm, Nick flips off the ropes, and arm drags Alex away. Another arm drag, this time holding on. Whip to Nick, rope work, kick from Nick, flips off the back of the head, chop to the head, locks the fingers, arm drag off the top. Tag to Silver. Johnny wants some Page. They bicker in the middle of the ring a bit, and Page asks for some fairness. They lock up. Side headlock takeover, leg scissors from Silver. Page escapes and tags in Matt. Silver tags in Evil Uno. Uno with a tackle, knocks Matt down, hits the ropes, CHEAP SHOT TO PAGE ON THE APRON!! Whoa.
Matt questions Uno, Uno kicks, tag to Alex. He comes in, eats a dropkick from Nick, double dropkick to Silver. Gutbuster from Nick, neckbreaker from Matt. They flex pose. Uno clothelsines both of them. He wants Page in the ring. Page doesn’t want this. Page says this is not a fight. Page is not having this. He hops off the apron. Bucks with superkicks to Uno! Matt to the top rope! He flies off with a cross body just as Nick flies onto Uno and Silver! Matt tags in Page, telling him to get his shit together. Reynolds is on his stomach, looking up at Page. Page doesn’t want to fight. He tags in Nick.
We are BACK and Uno is dropping Matt on his head with a suplex. Nick comes in, Uno with a neckbreaker! PILEDRIVER TO NICK!
In comes Page to talk to Uno. Uno with a hard right. Page does not 3want to fight back. Page leaves the ring, tags in, and walks right back in to fight Uno. Uno gets the upperhand with a bunch of rights. Matt in, gets sent out. Nick follows. Page with a right, one to Silver. Uno gets kicked in the corner, Hangman flies of the corner, Silver ducks, Page grabs Uno, Silver dropkicks Uno into Page. Tag to Reynolds. Cannonball from Uno! Reynolds DDT’s Nick from the apron! Stomp from Silver! All of Dark Order enters the ring. Silver and Reynolds with that bad ass double team back and forth they do! Reynolds with a pin! Dark Order tries for a Pendulum Bomb but in comes The Yung Bucks. Facebuster to Uno, moonsault to Reynolds on the outsid.e Hangman with a lariat to Silver! Page sets up for Buck Shot but he pauses! Bucks tell him to GO! He pauses. Uno and Reynolds on the outside, try to grab hangman, but Bucks dive through the ropes!!!
BUCK SH—–NO!!!! Silver with a rollup! 1..2..NO!!!! Flurry of kicks from Silver! DEAD EYE FROM PAGE!! BTE TRIGGER FROM THE BUCKS! BUCKSHOT LARIAT FROM PAGE!!
Winners: The ELite
Wrestling is ON FIRE tonight, y’all! Good god!
Total Rating: ***3/4
Match Time: 13:47
Page quickly runs to Silver to apologize. The Dark Order enter to grab Silver as Page and The Bucks look on.
HERE COMES The Blackpool Combat Club!!! They attack The Young Bucks and Page! Moxley with a screwdriver! He attacks Page with it! The Dark Order are still in the ring, but they leave the ring! Holy shit!
Takeshita with a suplex onto a chair!
Here comes Eddie Kingston! Hangman Adam Page hangs over the bottom rope, blood pouring from his head, staring at his former friends.
Claudio sits on a chair, that is on the chest of Eddie while Yuta has the arm in a lock. Claudio locks the arm and stomps it. Yuta and Takeshita attack Nick while Jon looks away from the pain being caused to Eddie Kingston.
Jon with a mic. He says this has been a blast, but it’s about time we finish this. They’ve been pushed to the limits, now they push beyond it. July 19th, Boston, BLOOD AND GUTS!
A video package for The Owen Hart tournament mixing some great old footage of Roderick, Samoa Joe, and Punk. Not to be forgotten, Dustin, Juice, Starks and Powerhouse get some love, too.
adam Cole is backstage waiting for MJF by his car. In comes Roderick Strong to warn Cole. Cole says he knows MJF is a snake, he’s just going to play along.
Here comes MJF to call Strong “Generic White Guy,” and tell Cole let’s get this show on the road.
Cole assures Strong MJF will definitely not be watching this back, so he’s not worried about expressing that he is fully aware off MJF’s jackassery.
A recap of Jungle Boy turning on Hook sends us to the live crowd where Jungle Boy’s music hits and Jungle Boy comes out to turn the song off. He’s over it, we’ve ruined this song for him. He has a car waiting for him at the airport, and the crowd is stuck here with wildfires. He is still
young, cashing fat check, and banging the hottest bitch in this place.
Did he turn on Hook or did everyone turn on him. After all he’s done, all he’s given, after being robbed of two world titles, we expect him to sit here and watch some entitled second generation little prick dangle his championship in his face? The funny thing is, the belt is not recognized by the company for the same reason that JB doesn’t recognize Hook. He’s a fraud. He never needed Hook. JungleHook was special because of him. The last time he was in a tag team, he was a world champion.
ASSHOLE chant, and Jungle Boy tells Taz that those chants are for him. Lol.
He hears the chants. When he gets his hands on Hook, he will beat the shit —-
Here comes the music. “It’s on,” says Taz.
Hook runs down, Jack leaves the ring. Hook follows, totally passing the invisible barrier that stop all face wrestlers!
WE head backstage, and Hook continues to chase Jack Perry who hops into a nearby car, and it drives away. Hook, upset, tosses a trash can.
Ruby Soho vs Alexia Nicole
Ruby corners Jobberina and stomps her down a bit. A boot to the chin solidifies Ruby’s heeldom. She tosses her opponent to the outside where Toni Storm gets a few kicks in. Saraya with one as Ruby distracts the ref. Ruby with a suplex onto Nicole, covers for 1..2..NO!!!
Ruby pulls her head up. She then grabs a glove from the ref and grabs her opponent in a Lockjaw. Tap goes the Jobber.
Winner: Ruby Soho
Meh
Total Rating: NR
Match Time: 2:10
Ruby on the mic. She makes fun of Britt for being sick and hopes her and Cole doesn’t have children, cuz they’ll be weak little bastards. Ruby loves who she is now. Does Britt? She is a shell of her former self. Doesn’t matter how hard she works. Britt doesn’t have fans. They shit on her if she sneezes in the wrong direction. Look at her, last year Britt barely beat her on her best day. Since then, collectively, they’ve taken everything and anything away from Britt. The title picked off her army of skanks, and next week, she’ll take Britt’s chance at a two-time Owen Hart Cup winner, and leave her left with exactly what Britt is…nothing.
Backstage, QT is here with Johnny TV who says he always makes hits.
Tornado Tag Team Match
Sting and Darby Allin vs Sammy Guevara and The Painmaker
We get Sting and Jericho in the ring while Darby and Sammy fight outside.
Sting and Jericho each have a bat and they go full on sword fight. Sting corners Jericho, knock the bat out of his hand, here comes Darby with a back splash. Sting hits one. Sammy off the top rope with a cutter to Darby! Jericho attacks Sting, and they both kick Sting out of the ring. Jericho follows, attacking Sting near the barricade. Sting whips Sting back first into a barricade. Sammy grabs a ladder from under the ring. Him and Jericho whip Sammy into the steps and he flips over the barricade ot the outside the hard way.
We come back to Darby nearly killing himself with a coffin drop off the top rope onto Sammy. Stinger with a Stinger Splash to Jericho against the barricade! Darby pulls a table out from under the ring. Sting grabs his own table! Darby sets the ladder up in the ring while Sting smacks the chair against the back of Sammy. He sldies Sammy onto the tables that are now set side by side. Sting enters the ring and he climbs the ladder. Darby is all like, “Yo wtf, bruh.” Sting is like, “Don’t trip, cuh, I got this.” Darby is like, “Fasho”
STING WITH A DIVE OFF THE FREAKIN LADDER ONTO SAMMY GUEVARA!!!!!!
Sting barely covers the space, landing more on one table and Sammy than both, and I’m pretty sure he hits his jaw on the edge of the table, as well. Lol.
Darby with a suicde dive to Jericho on the outside! He rols Jericho into the ring. Darby on the top rope, he’s got his skateboard! He flies off ONTO THE BACK OF JERICHO! COVER! 1..2….NO!!!! Jericho with the ladder! He smacs Darby with it! Jericho sets the ladder up in the corner. He grabs Darby, but Darby sends Jericho face first into the corner!! Darby checks on Sting, goes for a coffin splash, but FUCKING JERICHO SMACKS HIM ACROSS THE BACK WITH THE SKATEBOARD!!! JUDAS EFFECT!! Darby flies out of the ring!
We get massive cheers, so I hope that means STING is oK!
SSTING in the ring!!! He grabs Jericho! Jericho with the WALLS OF JERICHO!!! Sting pulls himself to the ropes! Pretty sure he’s bleeding from the mouth. He gets to the corner, but there are no rope breaks!!! Sting grabs his bat! He hits Jericho right in the dome! Sting stand as we hit 7:00!!!
STINGER SPLASH! Sting with anot—CODEBREAKER FROM JERICHO! COVER!!! 1..2….NO!!! Sting with a Scorpion Death Drop! Pin for 1..2..NO!!!
Jericho kicks! A dropkick try, but Sting grabs the legs!!! SCORPION DEATH LOCK! JERICHO TAPS!!
Winners: Sting and Darby Allin
I don’t know what I expected from this match, but I did not expect Jericho and Sting to do a bulk of both the work and the blood. Holy shit, man. Sting, you’re a monster.
Total Rating: ***3/4
Match Time: 12:59
End Show
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