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Hello and Happy Wednesday! I just murdered a 1.2 lb rib-eye, medium rare, so forgive me if my testosterone is at an all time high! I’m feelin manly! Get over here, Vanessa!

Oh shit, Dynamite…

It’s Wednesday…you know what that means!

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The lovely voice of Jim Ross starts the show, and it looks like we’re getting Good Ol JR for the opening contest, which is….A COFFIN MATCH!!!

Brody makes his entrance in the dark, and when the lights flicker on, Darby is already in the ring with a tac-covered skateboard! He smcks Brody across the back a few times as the bell rings.

Match 1: Coffin Match
Darby Allin vs Brody King

Darby grabs the skateboard and presses it against the forehead of Brody King, and he is BUSTED WIDE OPEN!!! We’re drippin already! Brody to the outside. Darby swings the skateboard, misses and hits the ringpost. He turns. HUGE FUCKING RIGHT HAND TO THE FACE BY BRODY! Holy shit!!! Brody sends Darby flying over a table then takes the skateboard over to the steps and breaks the board in half, but HERE COMES DARBY FLYING FROM OFF SCREEN!!! Brody shoves him into the barricade. Brody is bloodied like hell. Darby to the top rope. Brody climbs, and Darby gouges the eyes! Darby with a Code Red off the top!!!

Darby drags the heavy body of Brody King across the mat on the outside. Body is DRIPPING, yo. He lifts Darby and sends him into the barricade, then chops the shit out of Darby, spreading blood across the chest. Brody grabs Darby, sends him into the. Barricade again, back first. Brody wipes his face then sends Dary into the crowd!

WE ARE BACK from a break, and Darby is laid out on a table. Brody to the apron, he hops up on the top rope, dives off the top and Darby rolls out of the way! Brody looks like he’s cosplaying Captain Spaulding, completely COVERED in red and white.

Darby is in the ring with a table. He looks for a suicide dive, but the lights go out!!!

Commentary thinks it’s the Houes of Black, and when the lights go on, it’s confirmed. Buddy and Malakai are right side in front of Brody. Julia, from under the ring, trips Darby up. Matthews runs in and Murphy’s Law slams Darby down. Black walks over, leans over Darby. Hart is on the apron. Matthews sets the table up in the corner. Black holds Darby up against the table. Brody barks. He rushes the corner with a cannonball, crushing Darby into the table! Ouch!

WE WANTS STING chant. Brody is not eager to get up. Buddy leaves the ring, opens the coffin, and…

ITS STIINNNNGGGGG!!!! He’s got a bat! He clocks Murphy, one to the face, one to the gut! His facepaint depicts the mist to the eye! Sick! Sting enters the ring! Black is seated in the corner. Swing to Brody! Sting tosses the bat to Malakai Black, who stands with it in hand. Black looks to take a swing, stares Sting down, and Black drops the bat! He walks out of the ring, staring Sting down the entire time.

Black whispers to Brody on the outside, then heads up the ramp. Sting drops to the outside, and follows Black up the ramp!!!

DARBY WITH A SUICIDE DIVE FROM THE OUTSIDE!

STING and Black are Face to face! Brody sends Darby into the CORNER OF THE BARRICADE!!! THEN HE BODY SLAMS DARBY ONTO THE STEPS!!! Brody calls for the end. He walks up the steps with Darby on his shoulders. Darby holds the ropes and elbows his way down!

Darby grabs a chain, wraps his fist, and swings back to the face of Brody! Darby chokes Brody up with the chain!!!! He hangs Brody up and knocks out! Darby lets go, Brody falls DIRECTLY INTO THE COFFIN!!! It closeS! GAME OVER!

Winner: Darby Allin
I’ve got to admit that those first few moments were a little uncomfortable. Brody was leaking like a freakin stuck pig – and I’ve seen a stuck pig…that’s how the leak. But they stayed the course and had
Total Rating: ***1/2
Match Time:

Jon Moxley has some stuff to say about “Interim,” how bout we call his belt the FYI belt? This title was forged in Cincinatti, and just like the famed Hart Dungeon, this title is about pain and how much you can endure. For over two decades, we’ve watched the last survivor, The Lionheart, and watched his fighting spirit on full display. Tonight, he’ll test it. He’ll push it to its breaking point.

WE come back from break, and Jericho has his own promo time. He says he wil take back what is rightfully is his. He will beat Jon. He wants to face Lionheart? The Last Survivor? Be careful what you wish for. Jericho says he will stretch the shit out of Moxley. Tonight! He was the first AEW World Champion, and tonight, he will be the next.

Andrade and Rush are here, both masked up like Batman villains.

Match 2: Tornado Tag Team Match
Andrade El Idolo and Rush vs Lucha Bros

All four meet in the middle of the ring, and it dawns on me that I may sprain a finger during this match. Andrade and Penta go back and forth as Rey and Rush get some. Rush corners Rey, hits a clothesline, trips him up, and stomps him down in the corner. Andrade drops Penta in his corner. He looks to hip attack, but Penta reverses and kicks Andrade. Rush kicks Penta, Rey with a kick to Rush, he rushes the corner, but Rush with a belly to belly!! Penta drops Andrade! He and Rush meet in the middle of the ring! Superkick from Penta sends Rush outside. Penta looks to attack, but Andrade sweeps the leg! Rey into the ring, hits the ropes, dives onto Rush on the outside! He sends Rush into th ring, Penta is in, Rey hits the ropes, again, he dives onto Andrade!! Pumphandle into a suplex from Penta! Cover for 1..2..NO!!! Rey looks to dive, Andrade hits a dropkick! Powerslam from Rush! Rey kicks him in the chest! Rey flips off the ropes and Rush and Andrade slam him onto Penta. Double cover from Andrade and Rush. 1..2…N!O!!

Andrade attacks Penta, Rush with a right to the face of Rey. Lucha Bros on the outside, Andrade and Rush hit the ropes and dive over the top with a flip onto the other guys!

We are back and Penta hits kicks on both his opponents. Andrade flip Penta, Penta grabs Rush with a DDT! Rey up, locks the fingers, hops up on the ropes, dives, rana to Rush!!! Petna misses a right to ndrade, hops up onto the top rope, dives back, BACKSTABBER TO ANDRADE!! Cover for 1..NO!!!! Rey lifts Penta, then Penta Splashes Rey onto Andrade! Cover for 1..2..NO!!! Double superkick to Rush!!! Rey to the corner, hops up on the shoulders of Penta, dives off with a splash. Cover for 1..2..NO!!!! Rey with a kick to Andrade! Penta with a kick to Rush!!! They head to the outside. Lucha Bros hit the ropes! THEY both dive over the top rope!!!! Rey sends Andrade into the ring. Rey to the top rope. FROG SPLASH but Andrade has the knees up! Cover from Andrade! 1..2..NO!!! Rush in the ring now. Andrade goe for a Superkick, Rey ducks!!! SUPERKICK TO RUSH!!!!! Penta in! Superkick to Andrade! Rush double dropkick to Penta! Andrade up! He hits the corner, rushes into Penta’s face with double knees, but Rey hops up and high kicks to the side of the face!!! Rey bounces to the 2nd rope, dives off, Rush spikes him! Penta here to drop Rush face first!! ALL FOUR MEN DOWN!!!

Penta rolls to the apron with Andrade. Destroyer! Rey rolls Rush to the apron. Penta grabs him by the head, double underhooks. Rey to the top rope, Andrade is up, Rey walks the ropes, Andrade tugs on the ropes, Rush kicks Penta! Andrade in, Rey fights back with an elbow, headbutt from Rush. Andrade drops an elbow on the face of Rey as Rush ties Penta’s mask on the ropes! Cover from Andrade for 1..2..NO!!!! Andrade comes to help tie Penta up. SUPERKICK FROM REY!! Rush with a shotgun dropkick off the top rope! He straight jackets Rey up then down with a piledriver. Penta tries to stop the pin….HE UNMASKS AND STOPS THE PIN!!!!! Alex rolls a mask into the ring, but Andrade grabs it as Jose attacks Alex on the outside!!

Andrade throws the mask into the audience. Rey rolls up Andrade for 1…2..NO!!!! Rush stops the pin! Andrade sends Rey into the corner as the crowd hants THROW IT BACK!!! Lol. Tight. Rush in the corner. He double dropkicks Rey in the face then goes to rip HIS mask off!

Rush sends Rey into the arms of Andrade, who Hammerlcoks then hits the finish! Cover for 1.2…3!!!

Winners: Andrade El Idolo and Rush
Yeesh. What a….rush.
Total Rating: ***1/2
Match Time: 14:03

Backstage, we see The Young Bucks walk into The Dark Order’s locker room. Everyone stands, The Bucks want the whole world to see this. They want to thank Hangman. He didn’t have to help them. The world has seen how they’ve treated Hangman. If they could take it all back, they would. Matt has been reminiscing a lot. His favorite time of his career was when they were all together, doin this thing, building a revolution. Everything got weird. We don’t know if it was money, tv time, fame, Matt got weird and selfish. He is sorry. He means it.

This building, this is here Page won the title. Matt was so far away from him, couldn’t even get the courage to congratulate him. They were so proud. He really wishes he enjoyed the journey more than the destination. Now, he doesn’t know what he is. Maybe he is a bad person, arrogant, maybe we are right. But he knows that when they are around Hangman, he brings out the good in them. So he wants to ask….will he be their partner. One last time?

Hangman knew this would happen. He would love to. He just cant. He cant. He knows what he said, how proud he was, he didn’t congratulate Page. But The Dark Order did. They were there for him. The tournament, this is Dark Order’s chance. They are the trio, and he will be in their corner. He’s not in the contest at all. If they will have a partner, it should be someone who never turned their backs on The Young Bucks.

The Bucks walk out, Cutler asks them if Page was talking about him. Lol.

Jungle Boy is on commentary for the following match.

Match 3: Luchasaurus vs Anthony Henry

Stop. Drop. Shut them down. Open up shop.

Winner: Luchasuarus
Splat
Total Rating: NR
Match Time: Shiiiiiiiit

Cage in on the big screen, applauding Lucha! He says he was going to go out there and slap the shit out of Jungle Boy, but he deicded that the people of Minnesota don’t deserver to see him in person.

Jungle Boy knows where Christian is, he rushes backstage to attack Christian. In comes JB to nearly swipe Christian, but security is here! Lucha runs in as Christian runs away! Lucha goes buck wild on security unitl Pat Buck runs in, and Lucha headbutts him!

Miro with another bad ass promo about Black putting him into the dark Julia Hart comes in to grab his face, tells Dark to embrace the gift. Miro grabs her hand, says there is only one woman that can touch The Redeemer, and it is not her.

Oh no…

Jay Lethal comes out, but he isn’t alone.

To even the odds, Wardlow comes out and introduces FTR to be by his side!

Sonjay Dutt looks under the ring for something. What, I do not know.

Jay tries for a cheap shot on Wardlow, but Wardlow stops him, shoves, and BIG RIG TO JAY LETHAL!

JAS is backstage. Menard says he’s wearing his lucky red, history will be made tonight. He tells Moxley it’s been a hell of a run. Parker says they’ve got a little bit of the bubbly. Garcia tells Danielson to appreciate him. He put Bryan to sleep. He owns him. He’s a Dragon Slayer.

Anna Jay finds some random chick and chokes her out.

Match 4: Aaron Solow vs Ricky Starks

Totally miss this match due to a phone call, but it ends with a spear, and Starks bien a bad ass.

Winner: Ricky Starks

Total Rating: NR
Match Time:

The Gunn Club is backstage with Billy Gunn, and he’s upset. In comes Stokely to call him grandpa, tells him to take some medication to go home. Gunn stops him, tells ihm the jokes are funny, but he’s going to have a really bad day. Stokely leaves. Billy tells them he got a match for them on Friday. Here comes Danhausen to inform them it will be against him and “The Big Bearded Fellow.”

Match 5: TBS Championship Match
Jade Cargill vs Madison Rayne

Jade with a kick to the mid, she rushes the corner, but Madison is up top and flies off with a dropkick! Jade rolls to the outside. Kiera I there to cool her down. Rayne on the apron, Jade catches her, Rayne switches positions and hits a rana to Jade! She shoves Jade into the barricade.

Jade back into the ring. Rayne to the apron, gets distracted by Kiera. SPEAR FROM JADE!!!

WE come back from a break, and Jade has a delayed suplex on Rayne. She lands it, covers for 1..2..NO!!! Kiera is ringside, talking to the baddies about it bein a slow count. Jawbreaker to Jade. Left from Rayne, another, chops to the chest, Jade spins her, kick from Rayne, enziguri to the arm, she locks the head. Rayne to the top rope. She dives, misses a blockbuster, covers for 1..2..NO!!! Rayne locks the head, tries for a leg scissors, but Jade shoots her up, only for Rayne to hit a DDT. Cover for 1..2..NO!!! Rayne grabs Kiera off the apron, jade goes for a big boot, but it hits Kiera instead! Rollup for 1..2..NO!!! Rayne misses a kick, Jade hits her own kick to the side of the head.

She sets up for the finish, hits it, covers 1..2…3!!!

Winner: Jade Cargill
A little on the sloppy side, and the end result was never in question, but Jade is in the ring with the right people to grow as a performer. I’d really like to get the match with Athena over.
Total Rating: **
Match Time: Stopwatch issues

Athena is here to attack Jade from behind! Kiera pulls Jade out of the ring, leaving the title in the ring. Athena grabs it to make her point.

Toni Storm is the new Number One Contender, and Thunder Rosa says these things happen in this business. They’ll talk about the title match another time.

Jericho comes out to a Lionheart graphic and some different music.

He’s also freshly shaven with yellow and black trunks.

Match 6: AEW World Heavyweight Championship
“Lionheart” Chris Jericho vs Jon Moxley

After a middle finger from Moxley, Jericho hits an arm drag. Another arm drag sends Moxley flying. Test of strength. They go shoulder to shoulder. Jericho gets a side headlock. Jon escapes by spinning out, getting a side headlock takedown. Leg scissors from Jericho. Moxley from behind, side headlock, hits the ropes, Jericho shoots off, shoulder tackle in the middle of the ring, and both men still stand. Jericho hits the ropes, tries for one, slap from Moxley, one from Jericho. Shoots the legs, tries for Walls. Moxley escapes, Jericho works the arm from behind, and we get a submission from Jericho! Jon escapes, stands, chops Jericho in the chest. Jericho returns favor, they go back and forth. Snapmare from Moxley. Kick to the back. Snapmare and a kick from Jericho. Jericho grabs Moxley’s earring. He PULLS IT OUT OF JON’S EAR!!! Jericho shows the earring being ripped out. Jon on the apron, pulls himself up. Jericho hits the 2nd buckle, kick to Jon sends him to the outside.

WE are back and WTF happened!!! Jon is pouring blood! Jericho double underhooks and drops Jon on his knee. Jericho with a clothesline. Lionsault!!! Cover for 1..2..NO!!!! Jon turns this into an arm bar!!!! Jericho locks his fingers, but Jon breaks it and holds the hand pulling back on the arm. Jericho turns into the hold and hits some elbow strikes to the face. Jon pulls the arms back of Jon behind him, while sitting on his shoulders. Jon turns into this and picks the ankle! ANKLE LOCK!!! Jericho turns into it, kicks Jonaway. Step behind, GERMAN FROM JON! Jericho to his feet! GERMAN FROM JERICHO!!! Clothesline in the corner. Jericho pulls Jon to the corner, swings his leg against the ringpost on the outside, then tries for a Figure Four. Ref breaks the hold after 4. Jon rolls into the ing as Jericho celebrates his advantage. Jericho enters the ring. Jon with an arm bar, transitions to a Crossface! Jericho escapes. WALLS OF JERICHO LOCKED IN! They are center ring! Jon is fading. Jon pushes up, screaming as blood pours.

We are back and Jon Moxley is STILL in the Walls! He reaches for the ropes and breaks it, finally. Jericho is peeved. He stomps Jon, kicking him onto the apron. Jericho hits the corner, tries for the dropkick, but Moxley sends him flying to the outside! Jon pulls himself up in the corner. He heads to the top rope, DIVES ONTO JERICHO!!! He mounts and gets some right hands to the head! He hits some forearms then sends Jericho back into the apron. Jon to the top rope again! He dives. CODEBREAKER FROM JERICHO!!! Jericho kicks Moxley in the face and mounts with some punches.

A bat flies from out of nowhere! We see it’s Sammy in the crowd! Jericho with the bat in hand, clocks Moxley across the head! Cover for 1..2..NO!!!! Moxley with a surprise rollup for 1..2..NO!!! Rear choke from Moxley!! Jericho turns into it, sends Jon into the exposed buckle! JUDAS EFFECT!! Jericho falls to his ass. Slow to cover. 1…2……NO!!!!! Jericho has the title! He tries for ahead shot, but Jon moves! SLEEPER!!! Into a bulldog! Jericho to one knee! Elbows to the crown of the head. Jericho elbows out. Shoots the legs. LIONTAMER!!!! Jericho has blood pouring from his head now! Knee to the head! Jon turns inot the hold, hooks the leg, slinks onto the back, and elbows the back of the head over and over again!!!

SLEEPER!!!! Leg scissors! Jon hooks the arm, cinches the hold. Jericho struggles, shakes, reaches, TAPS!!!!!

Winner: Jon Moxley
Holy cow that was amazing! I had so much doubt, and maybe that’s why I’m so shocked at how good this was, but I did not expect THIS Jericho. What a match. What a main event.
Total Rating: ****
Match Time: 22:06

After the match, Hager and Guevara come into the ring and attack Jon Moxley!

Hager chokes up Moxley, Jericho holds the title up in the air, but here comes Claudio, Ortiz, Yuta, and Kingston!!! The numbers even out and the crowd is going CRAZY!!! Kingston and Claudio corner Hager.

Here come Garcia, Parker, and Menard! They come in to even the odds. Kingston tries to pull Garcia outside. Jericho has the title in hand. Menard is holding Moxley up.

CM PUNK IS BACK!!!!!!! HOLY SHIT PUNK IS BACK!!!

Punk clotheslines Parker on the ramp! Then Garcia! Sammy launches himself over the top rope and CM Punk just sends him into the steps!!He shoots Hager over the top rope! Jericho with a title shot but Punk ducks! Clothelsine sends Jericho to the outside!!!!

Punk cleared the ring! Crowd is alive!!!!

Moxley stirs in the ring as Punk stand on the ropes to point down at JAS!

Punk chant.

Jon stands slowly, thanks God for his safety, Punk is right behind him. Jon turns, they go face to face. GAWDDAAAMNNNNN.

Moxley’s ear is dripping blood. He stares Punk down. They do the Rock/Hogan staredown. Jon flips CM Punk off and shoulder checks him as he leaves the ring.

Jon meets Claudio at the bottom of the ramp, and they knock shoulders in celebration.

End Show