Shotzi Blackheart On Being a Survivor of Sexual Abuse and Assault, Finding Therapy in Theater

Shotzi Blackheart had a difficult childhood growing up, and spoke with Lilian Garcia on Chasing Glory about being a survivor of sexual abuse and sexual assault before she was 18. Blackheart appeared on the podcast and revealed that she was sexually abused by her uncle and then later was raped in high school. She got emotional as she talked about how she dealt with that and noted that she found a lot of therapy in musical theater, which was the passion that eventually brought her to professional wrestling. You can check out highlights and the full audio below:

On being a sexual abuse survivor: “I had a pretty rough childhood, to be honest, yeah. I bounced around from like, my mom’s to my dad’s, and to friends’ houses at a really young age. I dealt with like, a lot of sexual abuse for years, and after — when I finally came out about it and like went to — I went to my middle school counselor and, he’s in jail now. He’s still in jail. But some of my family didn’t believe me … some of my family didn’t. My dad really helped me through all of that, and so did musical theater. That’s why I connected with performing so much. It was like a big outlet for me. And I was a really depressed kid, but not onstage. It just all went away. So that was my therapy.

“But because of that, it was hard for me to stay anywhere, ’cause I just constantly felt like someone didn’t want me there because I was being blamed for what happened to me. It was tough, but I know that I’m a lot stronger for it. And I found, like, theater and performing through it.”

On her story hopefully being able to help others dealing with it: “I don’t really get to talk to a lot of people about it. Because I feel like, especially with sexual abuse, people get really closed off and feel really awkward about talking to people about it. It means a lot to me to talk about it right now, just because I know that so many girls deal with this. It’s like a crazy amount. And I encourage girls to come to me and talk about it because I’m so open with it.”

On getting help dealing with the trauma of her abuse: “I had to do a lot of therapy afterward. And I found like, a really awesome therapist. And so that helped a lot. And like I said, performing was always just like therapy in itself. So I think I always chased it, so I think wrestling is therapy for me too. And now I just need it. It’s in me now. But yeah, it was hard for a while. I was really depressed, but I work on it every day. Trying to stay positive and not letting it get to me.”

On being sexually assaulted in high school: “I had fun in school, except for high school. High school was the worst. I deal with — girls were really mean to me in high school, it was the worst. And I was raped in high school, like my freshman year … But like, I told my best friend and she got me to come out about it. And everyone at school did not believe me. And like, they just labeled me as a slut. They were just like, ‘She’s lying, she’s a skank.’ And I just got bullied. I would come to school and go to one period, and then I I would get bullied so much that I would just run back home. So I had to change high schools like halfway through my freshman year. And then I just was like, ‘I don’t want friends. I just want musical theater. I just want to hide in the theater.’ So I kind of did. I just stayed in the theater, I ate lunch in the theater, I just focused on musical theater.”

If you use any of the quotes in this article, please credit Chasing Glory with a h/t to 411mania.com for the transcription.

Listen to “Shotzi Blackheart Comes Face-to-Face With Her Tragic Past” on Spreaker.