The Dusty Shelf: WWE WrestleMania 22

The Dusty Shelf: Wrestlemania 22
By Stuart James

Note on The Dusty Shelf: The Dusty Shelf is a look back at forgotten gems that some people underrate for whatever reason. Alternatively, these DVD reviews can be events which have a good reason to be at the back of a cupboard, never to be viewed again. This article bases its report on the match quality, booking quality and overall fun and flow of the show before finally deciding if the DVD belongs on the shelf, or should be a part of all wrestling collections and watched regularly. So let’s get started with …

Wrestlemania 22:
Rosemont, Illinois

Now Wrestlemania 22 may not seem like much of a forgotten event, since it only happened two years ago, however it does seem to me that people will likely disregard it, as most people will say that outside of Edge-Foley, there are no stellar matches worth remembering. Others are different, and are adamant that this Wrestlemania is up there with the “big ones” such as Wrestlemania X-Seven (widely regarded as the best pay-per-view of all time), Wrestlemania X and Wrestlemania III.

Wrestlemania 22 is one event which was built up as a huge event, with the biggest selling points being the two main events, naturally, and Shawn Michaels-Vince McMahon in a street fight. Many wrestling fans at this time were really starting to turn on then-WWE Champion, John Cena, and others were disgusting by the promotional tactics on the SmackDown! side of things, exploiting the death of Eddie Guerrero. This was WWE’s chance to turn things around and provide an event which could show the fans a change.

The fans in Chicago, throughout the event, were “smart”, to use a more polite term, but that just added to the intrigue, since a lot of babyfaces were jeered throughout the event. They were hungry, especially, to see Triple H defeat John Cena for the WWE title and save them (where have we heard that recently?).

Your commentators are Jim Ross and Jerry “The King” Lawler.

First thing’s first, the video package to Shinedown’s “I Dare You” before the show is by far and away the best video package the WWE has ever done. Its up there with My Way between Rock and Stone Cold at Wrestlemania X-Seven in terms of emotion, and really makes me remember why I watch wrestling. God bless you, Shinedown!

Opening Match:
World Tag Team Championships: Carlito & Chris Masters vs. Kane & The Big Show©

Going into this match, I wasn’t expecting much, and expected a match to go on after Money in the Bank, figuring that Chris Benoit-JBL would be the opening match. Big Show and Kane weren’t the guys to carry Carlito and Chris Masters through a match, and Chris Masters still wasn’t proven (and in reality, he never did prove himself). Carlito, I had faith in, since he was slowly and steadily becoming a fan favourite, much in the same way Shelton Benjamin did at the previous Wrestlemania, and was hoping for the heel team to win just for him. In retrospect, this was probably the right choice, since it had more crowd heat to it than JBL-Benoit, and provided the babyface victory that would get the crowd fired up for the evening. Having said that, this match was a glorified Raw match, with a couple of extra spots, such as Kane’s “athleticism” as JR referred to it. As with most matches containing Big Show & Kane, it wasn’t particularly fast, but Carlito and even Masters bumped around the ring, selling like crazy to make the match watchable, before the inevitable Big Show & Kane victory (which would be about the fifth victory for Big Show and Kane in their six month reign as champions).

The highlights of the match were the chop to Chris Masters, which just reminded me of those Johnny Bravo episodes where his muscles would deflate. CHOP! “Woah Moma – this won’t end well!”. Carlito and Masters did some great heel psychology with the removal of the turnbuckle pad, and it all worked for me because usually its blatantly obvious when the pad is removed, just so the crowd will pop for the near fall, but why would you want to make it obvious? Its like robbing a bank in broad daylight with no weapon, no mask and shouting “I’m going to rob you!”. The Masterpiece would make a mistake and hit down Carlito, although if people have a memory, Carlito did screw Masters out of two potential title wins (at the Royal Rumble and New Year’s Revolution), but then an accidental hit to the back of the head led to Carlito leaving the team. Fair? Why not, we’re WWE. So Kane picks up the win on Carlito, and stay World Tag Team Champions. Carlito would turn face and leave Masters in what was a one-month midcard feud. Don’t worry about Kane and The Big Show, though. They’d continue their single’s career after dropping the titles to … The Spirit Squad. Yes, that’s right. But at least we were gifted to Kane-Big Show at Backlash, right? … Right?

At least this match did what it had to and get the crowd fired up for the event. In that respect, good work all round you four guys, even though only Big Show has a meaningful career anymore. Chin up.

Winners and STILL World Tag Team Champions: Kane & The Big Show
Match Rating: *1/2

Shawn Michaels gives a promo next to Coach, so I guess Shawn’s forgiven him for all his biased work? A Sweet Chin Music to Coach probably would’ve said a whole lot more, but this promo did set the tone for the rest of the night, and it was actually really good, in my opinion. It also set the base for the God angle that would soon happen next month at Backlash involving God (isn’t Backlash looking to be a stellar card?). For now, still, this is great work by Michaels.

Match Number Two:
Money in the Bank Ladder Match: Matt Hardy vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. Finlay vs. Rob Van Dam vs. Bobby Lashley vs. Ric Flair

This, for me, was really hit and miss. Hardy, Benjamin, Finlay and Van Dam were all experienced enough to pull off a great match in this environment, and had no doubt that they’d perform well on the Grandest Stage of Them All. Bobby Lashley, though, was still green and that was actually visible throughout the whole match, and Ric Flair, while great, is closer to eighty than he is to being in his twenties. In the end, it didn’t matter as much. Lashley would be taken out before the finishing sequence, and Ric Flair sold like crazy to take himself out the match without screwing the customer.

Naturally, people will compare this with the previous year’s ladder match. I personally prefer this one, but in many ways they trade traits with one another. The 22 ladder match doesn’t have a running theme, such as Benoit’s classic selling of the arm, whereas the 21 ladder match doesn’t have the drama of Ric Flair leaving and chopping the hell out of everyone that moves, before having his dreams shattered (and not Goldust style) by Finlay and his shillelagh. Another thing is Benjamin’s spots in the first ladder match were more in tune with the math, whereas in the second one it seemed like they just did it for the sake of doing it. The main reason I choose the second ladder match is the overall match: Rob Van Dam won after bumping like mad, doing at least five awesome spots and really getting the fans behind him, whereas Edge did very little. Now I know it works with his heel persona, but they could have followed the same ending but still had Edge getting some good spots in from time to time.

The noticeable spots were anything involving Shelton Benjamin. Tazz: “He’s like freaking Spiderman!” Yes, but couldn’t Spiderman use his web and swing up to the briefcase? Then again, Spiderman was from New York, whereas Batman films were filmed in Chicago. Lets call him Batman, and used his trust utility belt to stick to the ladder. “What don’t you have in that belt?” “Patience.” Anyway, then you had the classic Rob Van Dam and Matt Hardy spots, which have both been done in prior ladder matches but have aged well. Now the ladder match is a concept which has been watered down, and is basically used because it is a fairly sure fire way of getting a good-great match on the card, but I still marked out for the bump Matt Hardy and Benjamin took at the end. That was sick.

In the end, the right man won, as it led to a very memorable match with John Cena, and it’s what the fans desperately wanted to see. Great match, great ending, great spots and a great addition to the card. Kudos to all six, who did their part perfectly.

Winner: Rob Van Dam
Match Rating: ****

On other note, Orton is an asshole to Mean Gene backstage. Bad Randall. Then Dave Batista comes along and hurts Orton with a slap. Guess he won’t be winning tonight? All good stuff though.

I love the Hall of Fame ceremonies, and don’t agree with people who call it filler, when its not really. I thought that year’s was brilliant, so you won’t see any wise-cracks here. Just really emotional stuff. All the inductees deserved it, so well done to them all. A special RIP to Eddie Guerrero & Sensational Sherri.

Match Number Three:
United States Championship: John “Bradshaw” Layfield vs. Chris Benoit©

If you’re put straight after an insane spotfest, you’re doomed and this is exactly proof. JBL has one of the best gimmicks of all time, and gets great heel heat, and Benoit had been loved and admired his entire career, but this match got barely any crowd reaction. It was a solid, stiff match, but I felt as though they could do better (and they eventually did on SmackDown! two weeks later), but this was to cool down the crowd and slow it all down. On another note: JBL’s entrance was awesome!

One funny thing is Michael Cole’s commentary. Now, I’m not like other fans, I think Cole is a great commentator when he wants to be. But I still find it hilarious when JBL does the Three Amigo’s its “HORRIBLE, DISRESPECTFUL, MASSIVE EVIL!!!11~~”, while Benoit’s is “a tribute to Eddie”. Although it all works, since JBL gets his heat and Benoit gets the cheers (which is more than CM Punk got for it … poor kid). Another funny fact: this match is longer than the SmackDown! World Title match. Yeah. A midcard filler, for cooling down the crowd gets more time than Rey’s special moment.

This is another solid, if forgettable, match, but like MVP-Benoit a year later, this one just provides more balance to the card, and makes it more enjoyable to watch as a whole. The ending sequences was really neat, and wasn’t a crappy rollup and grab the ropes like it usually is. However, in the end its just the world Benoit match at Wrestlemania you’ll find.

Winner and NEW WWE United States Champion: John “Bradshaw” Layfield
Match Rating: **1/2

Match Number Four:
Hardcore Match: Edge (w/Lita) vs. Mick Foley

This is what people remember from Wrestlemania 22 and rightly so. Like a lot of this show, this was going to be like a Booker T match: really good, or really crap. Mick Foley was broken down, past his prime and most people thought he couldn’t make the career of Edge like he did with Randy Orton and Triple H. Edge, on the other hand, was at the peak of his career, but was still battered by injury, as opposed to Orton and HHH who were both healthy for their classics with Foley. How did it go?

Chances are, if you’re reading this, you’ve probably seen or heard the praise this match gets, and have more than likely seen it already. This match stole the show, and is the fourth match with at least four highly anticipated matches still to come. Foley took some sick bumps (the worst being the knees first into the ring steps: please stop doing it Foley). Edge proved his worth taking the barbed wire shots, and the bare backed thumbtacks shot, and still pulled through. Even Lita took a couple of sick bumps, and the crowd loved every second of the match. They teased the lighter fluid, but in the end it was all worth it.

As for the ending, well, it’s made Edge’s career. Is it a coincidence that after this match he’s won the World Title three times? You decide, but this match has got to be a factor, with the bumps he took and pulling a great match out of a guy that is at least three years past his prime. This was the highlight of the show for me, and deserves all the praise it gets. Match of the night.

Winner: Edge
Match Rating: ****1/4

On another note, Booker T is the funniest guy ever. Goldust can be funny too, but Booker T has the best facial expressions ever. I went on Youtube after watching the event, based on what happened backstage to Booker T and found myself watching for hours. Here’s just a few:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I3vQ-q3wu2k
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AbWnk6Gmo-E
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VRWi8sMA8_8
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gOwLTjdP9F8
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D4apzlxSDcs

But don’t watch them until you’ve finished reading the review.

Match Number Five:
Handicap Match: Booker T & Sharmell vs. The Boogeyman

This match, sucks. Booker T is a guy who works well only with people who are great (see, Benoit-WCW), but give him somebody who can’t work, and you’re in for a bad match (see, this match). For starters, due to the Boogeyman’s completely awesome entrance (that is not a joke), nobody could see a thing, but thankfully we didn’t miss much. Its just a filler to calm down the crowd. Sharmell eating the worms and Booker T’s facial expressions stop this one hitting negative stars. Being scared of your own pyro is the perfect way to sell someone being shit feared of another man.

Booker T loses, and then in four months wins the world title? Does that mean Boogeyman could win the World Heavywei …

The match was worth it for the backstage promo alone. That was just brilliant.

Winner: Not us … The Boogeyman
Match Rating: ½*

Match Number Six:
WWE Women’s Championship: Mickie James vs. Trish Stratus©

This match is probably the finest Women’s match you’ll see in WWE, ever, and the best in North America in a long time. Its just brilliant. Storytelling, psychology, selling, in-ring action. In terms of actual wrestling and not relying on weapons, this is the best match of the night. Mickie focusing on the leg is just tremendous, and the fan support she gets is unreal. That’s basically the biggest cheer anybody gets that isn’t Triple H or The Undertaker. Lots of people say its because of the crowd, and others say its because she’s a lesbian-psycho and men like lesbian-psychos. Me? I think it’s because she’s just an awesome wrestler, probably the best right now outside of Japan, and that says a lot, since you have women like Sara Del Ray, Cheerleader Melissa, Gail Kim, Awesome Kong, etc.

The ending shouldn’t have been edited out on the DVD release. The Stratusfaction being botched could have easily been manipulated to say Trish’s leg gave way after all the work, and rightly so.

Winner and NEW WWE Women’s Champion: Mickie James
Match Rating: ***1/4

Vince McMahon praying will sell any pay-per-view. That is just the funniest thing I’ve ever seen. “And I’m sure god, you never intended for a sixty-year old to have a Hercules-like physique like me”. Brilliant. The backstage stuff at Wrestlemania 22 was the best I think I’ve ever seen.

Match Number Seven:
Casket Match: Mark Henry vs. Undertaker

Another funny thing: this match, is also longer than the World Title match. WWE give Mark Henry and The Undertaker more time (albeit being about thirty seconds) than Randy Orton and two of the finest wrestlers in North American history (even if they are broken down). The worst thing is, this match had no heat outside of Undertaker’s offence for two reasons: Mark Henry has never, and will never, been over and nobody cares; and everybody and their momma knew Undertaker was winning.

Naturally, this one should have dwelled close to negative stars, but Taker’s selling and Mark Henry’s sloppy offence kept to a minimum (and letting him do what he can competently) stops that. Plus Undertaker throwing himself over the casket will be etched in my mind forever. * just for that, and an extra ½* for exceeding my expectations.

Oh, and people need to stop trying the 10 Punches in the corner to Undertaker. It’s always going to be a Last Ride. It happened to Randy Orton, it happened to Triple H, it happened to Henry and it happened to John Cena. Just like you can’t headscissor Austin Aries, you can’t punch Undertaker in the corner. Just a quick note.

Winner: The Undertaker
Match Rating: *1/2

Match Number Eight:
Street Fight: Shawn Michaels vs. Vince McMahon

Shawn Michaels is a god. Now, Vince McMahon is consistently brilliant in street fight environments, and has performed greatly since 1999, but no street fight of McMahon has ever been this good. And it’s a freaking squash match. Michaels absolutely kills Vince out there with all sorts of things.

The Spirit Squad comes out, and Shawn Michaels starts hitting them with the megaphone (not before THAT Leg Drop) by Kenny. Shane McMahon comes out, and Michaels disposes of him, but not before shoving his head up his dad’s ass! I hope he got paid well for that. It’s a cliché, but Vince was a broomstick, and Shawn carried him to the match of his career (which is quite a feat, considering Vince is north of sixty). In twenty years, when people ask who was the best ever, and you narrow it down to the likes of Bret Hart, Ric Flair and Shawn Michaels, people should use this match to show why Michaels is just the best.

Michael’s storytelling in this match is unfathomable. He just goes out there and beats the holy crap out of an old man, and murders him twice: once with a chairshot, which sounded like somebody just got assassinated somewhere nearby, and the ladder shot that ripped the top of his head open. Just sick! And then, my favourite Wrestlemania moment ever: the Suck It on top of the ladder, before the elbow drop through a trash can, through Vince and through a table. One Sweet Chin Music later, and the match ends.

Why is this so great? Because WWE (kayfabe) screwed Michaels all the way to Wrestlemania, and he wanted revenge, and this was his chance. They promised McMahon would get an ass kicking and humiliation, and they delivered. That’s fine booking by my accounts.

They would then go on to have that tag match at Backlash, with the McMahon’s taking on Shawn Michaels and God. A part of me wants to hate that match, but it was just so fun. Back to Wrestlemania, the visual of Vince McMahon sticking his finger up after all that punishment is another moment this Wrestlemania provides, and this match made the DVD worth buying. A part of me wants to give it ***** for booking alone, and Shawn Michael’s work, but I’ll go with a more realistic figure.

Winner: Shawn Michaels
Match Rating: ***3/4

Match Number Nine:
World Heavyweight Championship: Rey Mysterio vs. Randy Orton vs. Kurt Angle©

JBL, Vince McMahon, Mark Henry. These are three people who were in matches longer than this. Now people look at this match in two ways: either it was a meaningless spot-fest with no story, or the action made up for the lack of time. I’m most definitely in the first category. For starters, this match should have just been Rey Mysterio vs. Kurt Angle. Randy Orton had no right to be in there, and was just there because WWE wanted to push him to the moon, only for him to Orton his own career and get suspended. And did WWE honestly think Rey Mysterio vs. Kurt Angle, in Rey’s quest to defeat the unstoppable machine-like champion Kurt Angle, the best pure wrestler in WWE history against the biggest little-man wouldn’t draw? That match, put on for twenty minutes at the end of the show without any Eddie Guerrero stuff, would have sold out any pay-per-view within seconds. But it wasn’t to be.

Instead we got a nine-minute long triple threat match for the main event of Wrestlemania (SmackDown! should be used to it, it happened at Wrestlemania 21 as well). Now, they did some neat stuff in the nine minutes, and started off great with the pace they set, and they just kept trying to go faster. There was no build up to any spots, despite the spots being good, and because of this they were more prone to botching them (Mysterio botched the 619 twice). The Chicago fans, who were awesome all night, started booing Mysterio because he was made to look like crap in the build up for the match: getting beaten by Mark Henry, Finlay, Randy Orton and Kurt Angle in the weeks leading to the match, and barely getting any heat back.

Overall, it’s probably the worst booked match and build up of this Wrestlemania and one of the worst of any ‘Mania I can remember. Kurt Angle was made to look like a million bucks while Rey Mysterio just got thrown about until his two spots. Good match, awful booking that belongs down there IN HELL!

It was refreshing to see Rey Mysterio win the World Title, but then went on to become the worst booked champion in years, getting defeated in every match that wasn’t a title match. Randy Orton would get himself suspended, whereas Kurt Angle refused to take a break and ended up having to leave due to injuries. Ironically, the only one not a World Champion right now, in 2008, is Rey Mysterio.

Winner and NEW World Heavyweight Champion: Rey Mysterio
Match Rating: ***

Time for another cool down match:

Match Number Ten:
Playboy Pillow Fight: Candice Michelle vs. Torrie Wilson

Put it like this, you’re either going to skip this match because it sucks, or you’re going to watch it because the women are hot and you might want to wrestle with the one-eyed-trouser-snake. Your choice, really. But if you want a good women’s match, people re-insert disc one.

Winner: Torrie Wilson
Match Rating: DUD

Main Event:
WWE Championship: Triple H vs. John Cena©

You’ll either love this match or hate it. If you love great atmospheres in matches with lots of crowd involvement, you’ll love this match. The fans absolutely hate John Cena, with chants of “F*** you Cena”, and they adore Triple H. On a wrestling standpoint, its actually very slow and not a lot of near-falls compared to other Wrestlemania main events. On the other hand, they do tell a nice story throughout, but this is a match I don’t think has aged too well, and its only been two years.

Cena isn’t nearly as good as he is in 2007/8, and that is clear to anybody watching back. He isn’t carried, but his work is limited. Another flaw is that Triple H just isn’t the Triple H of 2000, no matter what anybody will say.

The great thing, as I referred to, was the Chicago crowd throughout the match. One thing Cena and particularly Triple H did was play to the crowd, and keep them into the match. The crowd desperately wanted HHH to win, to end Cena’s one year reign as champion (minus three whole weeks to Edge!), since he was pushed too hard down people’s throats and received a serious backlash.

This match lacked any real stand out moments besides the sledgehammer shot (which everybody bought as the finish), the F-U and then Triple H getting locked in the STF-U. Triple H was getting close to the ropes, nearly, nearly. And he tapped out! Wait, what? And then, everyone who thought it was a lock that HHH goes over was wrong, and HHH did a great job of putting Cena over as a world beater. Great in the long-run, since RVD dethroned Cena at One Night Stand in one of the most memorable matches of 2006. Good long term booking, and a very fun match to watch.

Winner and STILL WWE Champion: John Cena
Match Rating: ***

Final Thoughts:

We have four matches clocking in at three stars or more, one of which is dangerously close to hitting four stars, then an extra two that are four star or higher. You’ve got lots of memorable moments, from JBL’s entrance, to the flaming table, RVD winning money in the bank, Shawn Michael’s elbow drop, Rey Mysterio living his dream, the psycho diva steal the show, John Cena stunning the world by making The Game tap out. Its definitely a memorable show with just two poor matches, one of which made a hilarious backstage segment, and the other is a pillow fight between two girls. Three average matches making up the midcard, and the whole event has a Big Time feel to it (poor pun intended). There’s a solid thumbs up for Wrestlemania 22.

Peace Out

Stu

The 411: Take this one off the Dusty Shelf and pop it in and watch some good solid fun for four hours, because this is an underrated classic. Definitely not the best Wrestlemania ever, but its up there as one of the most solid cards and you won’t regret watching the whole thing. There are a few must-see moments, and equally some forgettable matches, but the beauty of Wrestlemania 22 is there is something for everyone, and it has aged surprisingly well, even if its only been two years.

Final Score:  8.0   [ Very Good ]