World Championship Wrestling (3.4.1989) Review

-Originally aired March 4, 1989.

-Your hosts are Jim Ross and Magnum TA. We now have graphics as JR runs down the card for this week’s episode, as little changes creep into the show week by week ever since the takeover.

RICK STEINER & “Hot Stuff” EDDIE GILBERT (with Missy Hyatt) vs. RIP MORGAN & MIKE THOR
-It looks like WWE tracked down a fan’s VHS recording for this episode. Thor gets punched down and Gilbert gets to work on the arm. Hiptoss by Gilbert, and in comes Steiner. Steiner goes nuts and tries to work a match with the turnbuckles, and Thor is terrified of his insane opponent.

-Steiner turns him upside down and rams him into the turnbuckles before tagging in Gilbert, “the rudder that steers this vessel.” Gilbert works the arm over and tags Steiner back in, and Thor wants out rather than wrestle the lunatic himself. Morgan misses a corner charge and Gilbert snaps him by the beard. Morgan gets some token offense in with a slam and a legdrop, but a legdrop only gets two in the NWA, where we wrestle. Golden opportunity for snark there and JR totally missed it.

-Thor tags back in and flops into the hot shot for three.

-JR talks to the Iron Sheik. Sheik proclaims his respect for Jim Ross because he’s from Oklahoma and recognizes toughness. Sheik challenges every wrestler, boxer, and football player to do what he’s about to do, and yep, it’s the Persian clubs. Sheik does some reps while JR diplomatically points out that Sheik never mentioned how much the clubs weigh so we can’t really be sure how tough he actually is. Sheik sings the Iranian national anthem before heading into the ring.

IRON SHEIK vs. COUGAR JAY
-Sheik throws Cougar Jay out to the floor and wails on him with a folding chair as the referee watches, helplessly unable to enforce the rules. Back in, the camel clutch finishes with ease.

-Paul E. Dangerously drops in and announces that he worked out a deal for three minutes of TV time on TBS every week, and premiering next…The Danger Zone.

THE DANGER ZONE
-Paul E. introduces us to his new bodyguard, “Secret Service” Jack Victory, and throws out a winking nudging reference to Brother Love before introducing his first guest ever, Ric Flair. Flair announces that he feels he has a point to make, so next week, in the interest of making a statement, he’s going to wrestle a match right here on TBS next week. And Flair is so determined to make a point that he’s actually willing to take a $25,000 guarantee from TBS instead of his usual $50,000.

-We get comments from Ricky Steamboat, who has departed the US for a series of title defenses in Japan. Steamboat has a frank discussion of philosophical differences between himself and the family unit, and Flair and his penis storage units. He clarifies that he’s willing to face Flair for a rematch any time, any day.

TV TITLE: MIKE ROTUNDA (Champion, with Varsity Club) vs. BOB EMORY
-After years of watching random jobbers get TV Title shots, JR suddenly just announces that Emory won a bunch of house show matches to qualify for this. I seriously was on board with just accepting that unless otherwise challenged, the TV Title opponents were selected at random.

-Rotunda smacks Emory across the back of the head, then goes to the floor and huddles with Varsity Club for a minute . European-style forearm by Rotunda takes Emory down, but Rotunda misses an elbow and Emory applies a side headlock. Rotunda makes the ropes and bails out for another huddle to rethink strategy.

-Back in, Rotunda gets a fireman’s carry takedown and works the arm. He dumps Emory to the floor and Varsity Club doesn’t even bother giving him a cheap shot. Back in, Rotunda applies a chinlock while JR and TA are frantically trying to put over Emory as a credible challenger, again emphasizing his recent phantom win streak. Rotunda applies something like a guillotine choke, except with the opponent facing outward, and gets a submission with it to retain.

-Kevin Sullivan announces that going forward, the TV Title will only be on the line for the first ten minutes of the match. He clarifies that, yes, that was already a thing, but the NWA was trying to railroad the Varsity Club. And Dan Spivey jumps in and announces that Rotunda is also going to put up $10,000 of his own money for every title match. Rotunda clearly wasn’t anticipating that, but reluctantly agrees to go ahead and put the money up for grabs. Sullivan is so proud of Rotunda that he names him the captain of the Varsity Club. Hidden highlight: Spivey and Williams trying to out-cocaine each other and Williams winning it hands-down by rolling around on the floor for no reason during the segment.

MIDNIGHT EXPRESS (with Jim Cornette) vs. JOE CAZANA & JULIO BARRERA
-Double backdrop on Barrera. Sweet Stan works the arm of Cazana and Beautiful Bobby drops an elbow. Abdominal stretch by Lane. Barrera tags back in and gets hiptossed around by Bobby, which is an impressive visual given that Barrera is built like Rusty Brooks. He actually appears to be wearing tights borrowed from Rusty too.

-Cazana tags in and just keeps getting dismantled. He rakes the eyes on Lane but Lane comes right back with an elbow, and the rocket launcher finishes.

-We’ve apparently skipped a rather lengthy replay of Luger/Windham from the PPV and jumped to Magnum welcoming Lex live in the studio. Luger, in a vain attempt at making Fetch happen, refers to Magnum TA as “Maggie” about a dozen times while offering some fresh insights about how he’ll defend the belt against anyone.

SAMOAN SWAT TEAM (with Paul E. Dangerously) vs. BOBBY MERCEDES & JOE CRUZ
-SST goes on the attack immediately while Paul E. drifts over to commentary and congratulates Dennis Condrey on being paid so well by Paul E. for the past year that he opted to retire comfortably instead of continuing to wrestle.

-Double-teaming by the SST while Paul assures us that Randy Rose isn’t hurting for money. Yes, he’s collecting unemployment and dipping into his savings account to get by, and yeah, he may have paid Dennis just slightly more, but Randy’s fine. Nerve hold and a crescent kick by Fatu. Samu with a DDT off the second rope to finish.

-Magnum welcomes the Windhams and Hiro Matsuda. Windham cuts a hilarious promo dismissing any discussion about a hand injury because he doesn’t believe in making excuses, and then immediately makes a series of excuses for losing the title to Lex Luger.

BARRY WINDHAM (with Kendall Windham & Mr. Matsuda) vs. GEORGE SOUTH
-Windham throws a right hand and winces in pain right away as the commentators speculate that Windham is trying to hide the extent of his injury from potential future opponents. JR reminds us that Matsuda is here on behalf of “the Japanese conglomerate.” Honestly, never identifying it comes off faker than a made-up name would have been.

-Backdrop and a chinlock. South hangs on and keeps fighting, but Windham dropkicks him down, and the flying lariat gets three.

STING vs. THE RAIDER
-JR suspects that Parts Unknown may actually be Oakland based on the jobber. Sting does one HELL of a dive for a criss-cross spot and then goes after the mask. Raider bails out to the floor while JR is doing a total open-mike night about wrestlers from Parts Unknown. “It’s down the street from Whatchamacallit!”

-Back in, the Stinger splash connects and the scorpion deathlock finishes.

-Jim Cornette and the Midnight Express gloat about the Original Midnights crashing and burning so badly that Paul E. needed a new tag team.

“Dr. Death” STEVE WILLIAMS & DANGEROUS DAN SPIVEY (with Kevin Sullivan) vs. CRASH CHANDLER & STEVE CASEY
-Williams punches away at Casey. Casey, riding a tidal wave of momentum from his accidental 25-minute match last week, throws a dropkick and works the arm. Crash Chandler tags in and both commentators are noticeably amused by the sight of this guy. Dr. Death applies a bearhug, but shows mercy and releases.

-Spivey applies his own bearhug and whips Chandler back and forth to work the spine over. Dr. Death tags in and gives Chandler a straight up wedgie before suplexing him. Spivey goes back to the bearhug, and this time it finishes.

-Sting is here and he’s frustrated because nobody is asking him for a match.

HACKSAW BUTCH REED vs. GATOR GILMORE
-God, where did this week’s jobbers come from? Reed gives him a neckbreaker and dumps him to the floor, with JR emphasizing the name “Gator Gilmore:” with utter derision. The funny thing is he doesn’t even have a discernable character, he’s just a guy in plain red tights going by the name Gator. Flying clothesline by Reed gets the win.

JUNKYARD DOG & MICHAL P.S. HAYES vs. GARY ROYAL & TRENT KNIGHT
-This one’s joined in progress, and taking a page from Bill Watts’ book, I’ll just declare that we’re picking it up at the 34-minute mark. Backdrop by JYD. Hayes joins him for a double clothesline and applies a chinlock. Trent Knight tags in as JR seems to be planting a seed for a heel turn by mentioning Hayes’ “split personality.” DDT by Hayes gets the win.

6.0

The final score: review Average

The 411

Lots of little seeds planted throughout the show, which kept it engaging.