wrestling / Video Reviews
The Name on the Marquee: Smoky Mountain Wrestling (3.19.1994)
Loading...-Sorry, had to skip a week.
-Originally aired March 19, 1994. For the record, this one is on the Network, but I’m reviewing this one from the original broadcast.
-We’re in Dungannon, VA.
-Your hosts are Bob Caudle and Dutch Mantell. Mike Furnas gets drawn for Beat the Champ, and Killer Kyle is apparently our new TV Champion.
BOBBY BLAZE vs LARRY SANTO
-Santo attacks right away, but your eyes are immediately drawn to the incredibly ghetto set-up for the ladder match later in the hour, with a check dangling from a wire that’s within reaching distance of the top rope, and every time there’s a bump in the ring, the wire shakes.
-Snapmare and an arm wringer by Blaze and Dutch gives us a running gag where he gives an Olympic score to all of the moves in the match. Santo dodges a corner splash and goes for a suplex, but Blaze turns it into a belly-to-belly bridge for a sudden three.
-Bob Caudle is with Commissioner Armstrong, who talks about the Loser Leaves Town cage match on April 1. Both teams have signed contracts through the end of the month of April, so Armstrong clarifies that if the Rock & Roll Express loses, the Thrillseekers will replace them in all advertised matches. If the Heavenly Bodies lose, Brian Lee & Chris Candido will replace them. He’s also not afraid of the Mystery Man that Cornette is touting for April 1 and he’s ready to take them all on.
-We go back to last week for a SHOCKING incident where Dirty White Girl had her blouse torn by Tammy Fytch.
-Dirty White Boy and Dirty White Girl call Tammy Fytch a “motel rat.” DWG promise to rip off Tammy’s clothes and then finish the job by ripping off her damn head, too.
BEAT THE CHAMP TV TITLE: KILLER KYLE (Champion) vs MIKE FURNAS
-Kyle suckers Furnas in by throwing a Tennessee jersey on the mat, and when Furnas bends over to pick it up, Kyle hammers him down and sends him into the ropes, but Furnas catches him with a shoulderblock and pins him immediately to take the title. This feels like a bad idea.
-We go to the closing minutes of a tornado iron man match between the Rock & Rolls and the Heavenly Bodies. Bodies take 3-2 lead with 15 seconds to go. Gibson goes for a cradle right as the clock runs out…and that’s it. Clean as a sheet. Huh.
-Cornette cuts a locker room promo, with the Bodies sharing an oxygen tank.
-Rock and Roll is here to stay, they’re not here to play.
Bluegrass Brawl 2, Friday April 1 at Pikeville College Gym! Losers Leave Town, SMW Tag Team Titles: Rock & Roll Express vs. Heavenly Bodies! Back Alley Brawl but really it’s a Tuxedo Match,, Dirty White Boy & Girl vs. Brian Lee & Tammy Fytch! Bob Armstrong vs. Jim Cornette & A Mystery Partner! Tracy Smothers vs Chris Candido in a $2500 Ladder Match! Thrillseekers vs Well Dunn!
DOWN AND DIRTY WITH DUTCH
Tammy and Brian are here to talk about their Back Alley Brawl. Tammy complains about being trapped into a stripping match. Tammy’s strategy for winning the match is to throw $10 and watch Dirty White Girl take off her clothes out of habit. The Dirtywhites don’t take too kindly to such slander, so they run to the ring and tear Lee’s clothes off, while Tammy runs to the floor and doesn’t offer any help at all. I love Tammy and Brian. Poor Brian is stuck in just the shittiest relationship ever, but she’s hot and rich so he doesn’t want to get out of it.
-Jim Cornette explains that he switched out Dick Murdoch for a Mystery Man because he figured out that telling Bob Armstrong who his opponent is has been a strategic mistake. Cornette teases that it might be Yokozuna.
THRILLSEEKERS vs INFERNOS
-Lance Storm and Chris Jericho finaly make their long awaited debuts, and the crowd is seriously AMPED for them. They don’t go near the fans as they enter, your first indication that they don’t grasp what Cornette was looking for out of them.
-Storm starts with, uh, we’ll go with Fire. Springboard bodypress by Lance and a HIGH dropkick. Jericho tags in and connects with a springboard forearm and a suplex for two. Double clothesline gets two. Snap suplex by Storm. Double missile dropkick gets three. Dutch mentions that their finisher is “reminiscent of another team,” which would have been a great seed to plant for a feud and a fresh new thing for the Rock & Roll Express to get into. Wasted opportunity.
-Thrillseekers cut a really energetic promo, saying they haven’t slept since they found out they were joining SMW.
$2500 LADDER MATCH: “Wild Eyed Southern Boy” TRACY SMOTHERS vs “Suicide Blonde” CHRIS CANDIDO (WWA Champion and US Jr. Heavyweight Champion)
-Candido is HILARIOUS during the introductions, as the check is hanging so damn low that he jumps up and down and just tries to grab it during Smothers’ entrance, while the referee yells at him to knock it off.
-Smothers takes Candido down with a kick. Candido tries to stop him from grabbing the ladder, but Smothers rams him with the ladder and brings it in the ring. They trade chops until Smothers kicks Candido out of the ring and sets the ladder up. Tracy rams Candido into the turnbuckles a thousand times. Candido fights back and rams Smothers into the ladder and chokes him out. Candido drapes Smothers across the ladder and goes to the top rope, but Smothers moves and Candido winds up splashing the ladder.
-Candido makes it back to his feet, but Smothers snziguiris him face-first into the ladder. Smothers comes off the top several times in succession, then heads up the ladder. Candido recovers and runs up there to stop him, but Smothers gourdbusts him from the top of the ladder, then grabs the check to finish.
-Candido is so mad that he attacks from behind, steals the check, and just goes nuts on Tracy with the ladder.
-Bob Caudle is with Tracy Smothers. He’s going to get his chance at revenge at Bluegrass Brawl!
