411’s Instant Access 09.16.07: WWE Unforgiven 2007

Hey kids, I’m Scott, and this is 411’s Instant Access: WWE Unforgiven 2007. Instant Access is a new experiment here at 411 Wrestling that will feature immediate reaction to wrestling pay-per-views. The focus here is going to be on first thoughts and snap judgments instead of play-by-play with the goal of providing you with instant access to one writer’s thoughts on the show. Okay kids, enough with the explanations. Let’s get to the wrestling.

ECW World Heavyweight Championship Match
CM Punk (Champion) vs. Elijah Burke
Match Result: CM Punk defeats Elijah Burke with a roll-up pin.
Match Length: 11:55
Match Analysis: Okay, I’ve got to say, I’m not sure how I feel about Punk and Burke curtain jurkin’ the show. Can you depend on them to put on an exciting match that will definitely get the crowd hot for the rest of the show? Absolutely. And if Punk and Burke were feuding over the Intercontinental Championship or the United States Championship, then I’d completely agree with the decision to have them open the show. But this is the ECW “World Heavyweight” Championship that we’re talking about here. This is a championship that is, at least in theory, on the same level as the WWE Championship and the World Heavyweight Championship. Like I said, at least in theory. We all know that things are different in practice, but I don’t think WWE needs to emphasize it by having the belt defended in the very first match on the card. Anyway, the match itself was solid if otherwise unspectacular. I give Burke a ton of credit for having the grapefruits to use the rolling Germans. It’s one thing for guys like JBL and Chavo Guerrero to use Eddie Guerrero’s shimmy and Three Amigos, but it takes a hell of a lot of guts to use one of Chris Benoit’s signature moves. It would be a shame if some of those moves were lost forever because nobody wanted to be the first to break the Benoit taboo, and like I said, I give Burke a ton of credit for being the guy to take one for the team. Oh, and that inverted Texas Cloverleaf that Burke pulled out was sweet as all hell. The match was fun and felt a bit different from the usual WWE fare, but the ending really did leave a sour taste in my mouth. I mean, seriously, a roll-up pin? Who wins a pay-per-view championship match with a freaking roll-up pin? Jay Lethal, that’s who. And he did it because Kurt Angle needed to be protected. Lethal’s roll-up pin served a specific and important purpose in the overall storyline of that pay-per-view. Punk’s roll-up was just a slap in the face of ECW. You wanna make ECW curtain jurk? Fine. You wanna only give ECW twelve minutes on pay-per-view? Fine. But the least you can do is let the ECW World Heavyweight Champion hit his freaking finishing move. I’m sure that somebody is going to argue that the finish was important in continuing the feud between Punk and Burke, but you could have done the exact same thing with Punk hitting the Go-To-Sleep out of nowhere. This really was a three star match, but I’m taking away half a star for the miserable finish.
Match Rating: **½

WWE Tag Team Championship Match
Matt Hardy & MVP (Champions) vs. Deuce & Domino w/ Cherry
Match Result: Matt Hardy & MVP defeat Deuce and Domino when Matt Hardy pins Deuce after the Twist of Fate.
Match Length: 9:20
Match Analysis: Cherry makes me happy. That’s probably just because I have some sort of freaky Olivia Newton-John fetish or something, but the girl makes me happy. Anyway, the basic problem with this match was that it was really just a vehicle to continue the feud between Hardy and MVP, and I have a bit of a fundamental problem with matches that are never really given the chance to succeed on their own merits. In this case we basically had a match between Matt Hardy and MVP with Deuce and Domino thrown in for flavoring. I mean, the psychology gets a little questionable when Matt Hardy is playing face-in-peril but his partner doesn’t necessarily really want him to make the tag. However, the reason that this match worked at all is that the WWE fans absolutely LOVE Matt Hardy. This match was Hardy vs. MVP AND Hardy vs. Deuce & Domino. Hell, that’s basically a three-on-one match. And that’s the kind of environment that will make a pro-Hardy crowd go absolutely ape shit. Anyway, all of that being said, I did rather enjoy the last few minutes of the match. I thought that they might be setting up an MVP face turn when he decided to return to the ring, but the rest of the match didn’t really seem to be leading toward that kind of transition. The finish did a nice job of emphasizing the fact that Matt Hardy is the work horse of the team, and I loved how Hardy handed the United States Championship belt to MVP but walked up the ramp holding both of the WWE Championship belts. At the end of the day, all four guys did all that they could in this match, but it was too bogged down with storytelling to ever have any sort of real chance of becoming a great tag team match.
Match Rating: **½

Triple H vs. Carlito (No Disqualification for Carlito only)
Match Result: Triple H defeats Carlito with the Pedigree.
Match Length: 10:41
Match Analysis: Holy shit, Triple H is in the third match of the show. That would have been insanity a few years ago, but I think that Triple H has proven by now that he really is determined to do what is best for the company instead of what might be best for his own career. Going into the match I was worried that the wacky stipulation would mean that the match was going to be horribly over-booked, but I was pleasantly surprised to find the Triple H and Carlito were able to tell a story that made sense within the confines of the stipulation while incorporating some good physical action into the match. Early in the match I was also concerned that Triple H was going to counter every one of Carlito’s attempts to use a weapon and basically make him look like a fool, but all of that changed when Carlito successfully connected with the ring bell. After that Carlito really went to work with cables followed by a couple of trash cans, and this match really started to feel like a legitimate hardcore match. I was really getting into the match when Carlito was in control, but the finish was questionable at best. I mean, how the hell did Triple H see Carlito coming with the chair if he had powder in his eyes? There’s just no way. Then, why did Triple H try to use a chair on Carlito? He should have the confidence to be able to defeat Carlito without the use of weapons, and it made no sense for him to think he needed to use a chair. I also wasn’t a fan of the low blow the led to the Pedigree, but I can see how people might argue that it was at least marginally logical. I mean, the argument would be that Triple H was sick and tired of Carlito being able to use weapons throughout the entire match and that he felt justified in hitting Carlito with a low blow behind the referee’s back. Like I said, that argument can be made, but I would have been happier with a cleaner finish. Overall, the match had the possibility to go from decent to good and possibly a bit further, but a lack of time and a nonsensical finish really hurt it in the long run.
Match Rating: **¾

Women’s Championship Match
Candice Michelle (Champion) vs. Beth Phoenix
Match Result: Candice Michelle defeats Beth Phoenix with a crucifix pin.
Match Length: 7:04
Match Analysis: Okay, before we get into this match, let me just say how much I respect Candice Michelle. Seriously. I can’t remember another new wrestler in years, let alone another Diva, who consistently improves week after week and continually adds new moves to her repertoire. Every week you can literally see how hard Candice has worked to improve and actually earn her WWE Women’s Championship, and that’s the kind of dedication and determination that I would love to see from every WWE Superstar. Now then, that being said, Beth Phoenix is one scary chick. I mean, not like Bertha Faye scary or anything, but you know what I mean. I’d love to see here in a match with Molly Holly / Nora Greenwald. Anyway, I enjoyed this Divas match more than I’ve enjoyed any Divas match since Trish Stratus’ retirement match one year ago at Unforgiven 2006. The great thing about this match was that Candice and Beth were able to tell a story that you rarely see in a Divas match. Almost every Diva in the last ten years has worked the same Divas style. Some do it much better than others, but for the most part it’s a variation on a theme. Lita threw bit more lucha into her style, and Gail Kim was a bit more technical, but most Divas look rather similar in the ring. Beth Phoenix is different. She’s able to use power moves that other Divas could never execute with any degree of credibility. That allowed Candice and Beth to have the Divas equivalent of a big man / little man match, and that was quite a refreshing change of pace in the WWE Women’s Division. If Trish Stratus / Lita was the Divas equivalent of Flair / Steamboat, then Candice / Beth is the Divas equivalent of Michaels / Diesel. These two ladies really impressed me tonight. And on a personal note, I’ve got to admit that I was really happy to see Candice retain the title. Like I said, I’ve got a ton of respect for her, and it would be a shame to see he loose the title so soon. I really hope that all of her hard work pays off in a lengthy title reign. She deserves it.
Match Rating: ***¼

World Heavyweight Championship Match
The Great Khali (Champion) vs. Batista vs. Rey Mysterio
Match Result: Batista defeats The Great Khali with a spinebuster.
Match Length: 8:00
Match Analysis: Going into this match you have to draw the obvious comparison to the World Heavyweight Championship match at the Great American Bash when The Great Khali faced both Batista and Kane in a Triple Threat Match. This is the exact same match with Kane replaced by Rey Mysterio, so the question is how much that substitution will change (for better or worse) the quality of the match. The first problem I noticed was some hella questionable psychology from Mysterio. We knew that Mysterio and Batista would team up against Khali in the beginning, but it was Mysterio who first turned on Batista and went for a roll-up pin. Sure, it’s every man for himself, and having Mysterio go for the roll-up isn’t even heelish. However, it is just plain stupid. Mysterio NEEDS Batista in this match. There’s no way that Mysterio should be able to hang with Khali on his own, and he should have done everything in his power to keep Batista on his side. It would have made sense for Batista to turn on Mysterio at some point; we’ve seen that he can take on Khali under the right circumstances. But having Mysterio turn on Batista and take his chances with Khali is the kind of idiocy that we usually only see from one of Randy Orton’s concussion victims. The next thing that drove me nuts was when Khali once again got his big dumb ass tied up in the ropes. That seems like it happens every other match. That man needs to learn to stay away from the freaking ropes. Anyway, in the end I think I enjoyed the Triple Threat Match from The Great American Bash more than I enjoyed this match. This match allowed for a greater variety of spots given the wide range of sizes of the competitors, but the monster / monster / monster dynamic of the match at the Bash was just all kinds of goofy fun. Finally, I’m glad to see that Batista FINALLY won the freaking title. I was sick of Khali. Really, really sick of Khali. Batista is the face of Smackdown. You wanna talk about an uncrowned champion? It’s not Bobby Lashley. It was Batista up until tonight, but now he’s got the gold that should go along with the marquee role he’s been asked to play on Smackdown. I could really enjoy having eight Punk / Batista / Cena or Punk / Batista / Orton as the three top dogs in WWE.
Match Rating: **¾

World Tag Team Championship Match
Lance Cade & Trevor Murdoch (Champions) vs. Paul London & Brian Kendrick
Match Result: Lance Cade & Trevor Murdoch defeat Paul London & Trevor Murdoch when Trevor Murdoch pins Brian Kendrick after a sit-out spinebuster from Lance Cade.
Match Length: 11:50
Match Analysis: London & Kendrick! London & Kendrick! London & Kendrick! I honestly do mark more for London & Kendrick than I do for any other Superstar or tag team in WWE today. How can you not love these two goofy bastards? I was PRAYING that Paul London would end up being the bastard son of Vince McMahon. I literally would have taken back every bad thing I’ve ever said about Vince McMahon and WWE if that had come to pass. Anyway, this match started out really well. London & Kendrick were working their style of match, and I was really impressed by how well Cade & especially Murdoch were able to sell their opponents’ rather unorthodox offense. The first hiccup came when London & Kendrick were setting up for their stereo suicide dives. The referee was threatening to disqualify London & Kendrick for both being in the ring past the five count, so they had to break their momentum for London to momentarily head back out onto the ring apron. This meant that Cade & Murdoch had to burn time on the outside until London & Kendrick could reset. This was all a result of WWE encouraging their referees to enforce the rules as much as possible. That’s usually a great idea, and for the most part it actually has helped to increase the credibility of matches. However, the referees also need to be careful not to interfere with the flow of a match, because that’s exactly what happened here. Fortunately, that was really the only noticeable problem with this match. The action was fast and furious from start to finish, and both teams were able to successfully work their own style and incorporate it into a cohesive match with their opponents’ style. This was just a good, solid tag team match, and there were some truly convincing near-falls leading to the finish. You all know how much I mark for London & Kendrick, and I had to stop typing at a few points when I literally jumped out of my chair. I was just loving this shit. You can talk all you want about the lack of depth in depth in the WWE tag team ranks, but matches like this one prove that the teams that WWE does have on the roster are still capable of some great matches.
Match Rating: ***¾

WWE Championship Match
John Cena (Champion) vs. Randy Orton
Match Result: Randy Orton defeats John Cena by disqualification when Cena refuses to yield in his assault on Orton.
Match Length: 7:26
Match Analysis: There were two things I noticed before this match even began. The first was how the crowd came alive as soon as Orton and Cena made their way down the ramp. Sometimes you forget what it means for a crowd to really be involved in a match, and then you get a match like this that reminds you how much a good crowd actually can add to a match. Granted, the crowd wasn’t quite as hot during this match as the crowd was during the Cena / Orton match at SummerSlam, but they were much more alive than they were for any of the previous matches on the card. The other thing I noticed is that Orton now has the aura of a credible main eventer about him. We all know that Orton’s first main even push was a monumental disaster, but this year Orton has grown by leaps and bounds during his feuds with Shawn Michaels, Rob Van Dam, and Dusty Rhodes. During the match, the first thing that I found absolutely amazing was the spot where Orton had Cena down on the mat in a head lock. This almost always leads the crowd to chant, “Boring! Boring! Boring!” But tonight the crowd broke into THUNDEROUS dueling chants of, “Let’s go Cena! Let’s go Orton! Let’s go Cena! Let’s go Orton!” That was really impressive and a true testament to the ability of Cena and Orton hold the crowd in the palm of their hands. This match was really picking up steam, and the crowd was on fire, and then… it all went straight to hell. Seriously, a fucking disqualification? Seriously? Seriously, you mental midgets? Look, there’s a time and a place for a disqualification. Even in a title match, even on pay-per-view, there’s a time and a place for a disqualification. Batista has been in a number of matches where a disqualification actually was the right call. But this was fucking asinine. Bottom line. Just fucking moronic. John Cena has been ON FIRE on pay-per-view this year. He’s put together a series of matches that is absolutely incredible. Epic even. Why the hell would you sabotage all of that by booking a fucking disqualification? Bite me. This was on track to be a three-and-a-half to four star match, but I’m taking a full star away due to the length of the match and the cluster of an ending. Oh, but I’m not done yet. Because we still have to talk about John Cena’s father PUNTING RANDY ORTON IN THE HEAD. Seriously, a father and son team going out and kicking ass? Where have I seen that before? Oh, that’s right. RANDY ORTON AND HIS FATHER! You might say that the symmetry is the point, but to me it takes Cena way too far into heel territory. This guy gets mixed reactions as a face. Let’s not screw with that formula by making him too much more heelish. And then, then, after all of that, we get Coach telling us that Orton will get a rematch next month at No Mercy in a Last Man Standing Match. I’m sorry Coach, but the correct answer was Hell in a Cell Match. Seriously, the whole impetus for this decision was the fact that Cena intentionally got himself disqualified and then subjected Orton to vicious outside interference. So the next match should obviously be held under no-disqualification rules, but it also needs to eliminate the possibility of outside interference. You could meet both of those criteria with a standard cage match, but the magnitude of this feud demands a Hell in a Cell Match. That was the money match. That MIGHT have made up for the craptacular ending. Maybe. But a Last Man Standing Match? I’m just not feeling it.
Match Rating: **½

Undertaker vs. Mark Henry
Match Result: The Undertaker defeats Mark Henry with the Last Ride out of the corner.
Match Length: 11:25
Match Analysis: Is The Undertaker all entrance? No. He’s one of the all time greats in the ring. But if The Undertaker WAS just all entrance, the he would still be the best part of almost every show. That entrance is just flat out awe inspiring. BEST. ENTRANCE. EVER. And in this case it’s a good thing, because we’re about to have Mark Henry main eventing a pay-per-view. Let that sink in for a moment. Mark Henry. Main Event. Pay-Per-View. That… that just doesn’t end well for anyone involved. However, if we must have Mark Henry in the main event, then The Undertaker is one of the few guys in the history of the business who might have a chance of dragging him to a decent match. And, by the way, I actually applaud WWE’s decision to put this match in the main event instead of the Cena / Orton match given the fact that Cena / Orton ended in a disqualification. Cena has OWNED the main event slot this year, but I give a ton of credit to WWE for realizing that you don’t want to end a pay-per-view with a disqualification. And I’m guessing that we’re going to have a clean finish in the Taker / Henry match. The match itself was just about as good as you could expect from Taker and Henry, but it certainly wasn’t any better than that. Sure, it was slow and plodding at point, but there was something awesome about watching two monsters like that go at each other. And hey, mad props to Taker for that Last Ride on Mark Henry.
Match Rating: **¾

Final Thoughts
Match of the Night: Lance Cade & Trevor Murdoch vs. Paul London & Brian Kendrick (***¾)
I think I made it obvious how much I enjoyed this match, but I’ll reiterate it here once again. These four guys went out and put on the definition of a solid, entertaining tag team match. This match easily could have been an awkward clash of styles, but instead these guys found a way to work together and put on twelve minutes of non-stop action. These guys proved that you don’t need to have a huge tag team division to be able to put on great tag team matches. Much love to all four guys.
Trash of the Night: John Cena vs. Randy Orton (**½)
Calling a John Cena match the “Trash of the Night” seems absolutely insane, but unfortunately it’s the truth in this case. However, in Cena and Orton’s defense, the situation really was out of their control. They weren’t given the time to have a real match, and they were booked into oblivion. I have no doubt that these two guys easily could have had the Match of the Night if left to their own devices, but fate (and Vince McMahon) had other plans.
Final Analysis: There were eight matches on the card, and all of them broke two stars. However, only two of them broke three stars, and none of them broke four stars. So I guess the bottom line is that nothing actively sucked (save perhaps for one hella wrong finish), but nothing was mind bogglingly spectacular either. All together you have a show that was definitely entertaining and never outright insulting, but also a show that we might not remember two months from now. Don’t go out of your way to order the replay. Buy the DVD if you’re a collector. Rent the DVD with a couple of buddies if you have a night to burn. Just don’t throw anything at that nice plasma screen during the Cena / Orton disaster.
Verdict: **¾ (for the overall show)