411’s NWA: TNA Report 06.09.04

Welcome to THE BEST DAMN TNA RECAP Ver. 1, of the 6-9-04 show for 411wrestling.com. I am your party host Larry Csonka! C “S” ONKA! S Widro! S!!!! But I thank you and all the staff for the kind welcome. As for me, I am doing well, thanks for asking! If you want to know more about me, take a trip over HERE. I am still diligently rehabbing my knee, but today it is swelled up like a basketball. Not fun! But this next little bit will be.

Mail fun!

Here is a colorful one from last week:

JJ won the title AGAIN? Explain yourself Zonka, EXPLAIN YOURSELF AND TNA!!!! I demand answers!!!”

-No Name

Well, My name is Csonka, can NO ONE get that right? But I will assume you were talking to me and give you your answer. Since this intelligent person has figured out that recapping TNA means I work for them I will come clean. I missed last weeks booking meeting, my flight was late and I didn’t get to voice my opinion. But if I had made it, the match would have been MUCH different. Well, not much, but there would have easily have been like 17 more guitar shots. There’s your explanation Slap Nutz.

Thanks to Stephen Randal for the plug in his Sunday Column. The Wednesday PPV might get a name. Actually, I just may name it myself. Also, I have had negotiations with the 411 higher ups, and after a hefty fee was paid, I am glad to announce that the Zonka-Stator will make its debut tonight! Thanks for almost ruining the surprise Stephen.

Back to business, remember I recap on the fly and do my best to catch as much as humanly possible. I don’t do star ratings, not my thing. I have a good time, and yes I really enjoy TNA as well as the WWE and mostly all wrestling. So sit back and relax and enjoy The Best Damn TNA Recap Ver. 1!

Kid Kash and Dallas tell us not to steal cable. He says if we do, we are losers. If we steal cable, we steal from him and Dallas. Don’t piss off Dallas he has 12 kids.

Memorial for Former President Regan runs.

Highlights of last weeks show, mostly the King of the Mountain Match where JJ became the NWA Champion for the 3rd time.

Raven is shown in an empty arena near the TNA Asylum, where he has challenged Sabu! There is a ring in this empty area.

Tenay and West welcome us to the Asylum, with the NEW AND IMPROVED 6-sided ring!

The ring crew rolls out the red carpet, as a trumpet quartet play the classic NWA Theme, for JJ’s coronation as King of the Ring. They announce him as “The Legend, The Immortal and the End all be all” Jeff Jarrett. JJ is out in a tux with white gloves and all. He looks like a waiter! HA! The NWA Belt is resting on a red felt covered table in the ring. The trumpet quartet plays some more. JJ has the mic, and here we go. Crowd with very loud “You Suck” chants. He said the music was awesome, but last week he captured his belt back, but was also made the King of the Mountain. Crowd chants for the Killings. He says there is a man who should come and strap the belt on him, Vince Russo. Here comes Russo. JJ takes his jacket off, and the crowd chants for Killings more. Russo straps the belt on JJ, as the crowd switches to “Bullshit” chants. JJ has a crown too, how cute! JJ puts his jacket back on, as Russo tells him to take a bow. Russo asks why? He says when TNA was started, JJ called him. Russo says JJ said they would work together to be a success. Russo runs down what TNA has done, talks about Impact. Russo says it took teamwork to get it done. JJ interrupts Russo and says when people see the TNA logo, they see JJ’s blood, sweat and tears. It has been ALL JJ. He says he has done it all, it was ALL JJ! Russo says he gives JJ credit, but it is the TEAM that did it. Russo says they need to work together. JJ is pissed. He says Russo is one to talk. He says for 2 years everyone was against JJ. But now he is getting the last laugh. He says Russo needs to lead the charge to jump on the JJ bandwagon. He says Russo is in his castle, and Russo needs to bow. Here comes 3 Live Krew! They beat down JJ! JJ escapes and runs up the ramp. Killings says he spoke with Russo, and JJ will have to go through a 3LK match…..ok.

Scott Hudson with Elix Skipper. Judson says he and Daniels won the fans vote, but Daniels was injured in Japan. They wanted the shot, but they just have to wait 4-6 weeks as Daniels recovers. Trinity is out, and she says there is no crying in wrestling, and the NYC will get the shot. Swinger says he has beat AMW, and tonight he will do it again. Gilbertti mocks Skipper and says they will win. Skipper says when Daniels is back, the NYC will know what time it is.

Highlights of Impact run showing AMW’s Tag Title victory.

Match #1 America’s Most Wanted (Chris Harris and James Storm) © vs. The NYC (Glen Gilbertti and Johnny Swinger) w/ Trinity

All 4 brawl to start. Storm and Gilbertti to the floor, and Harris and Swinger go at it on the inside. The NYC to the floor and Storm fly’s with a plancha on to them. Harris and Swinger in the ring, and Harris works the arm. Swinger gets a boot, and rams Harris to the steel post. Swinger works the left shoulder of Harris, and a tag to Gilbertti. Gilbertti takes him to the floor, and he wraps his arm around the steel post. Gilbertti tries an arm bar, but Harris escapes. Tag to Swinger, and he drops a knee to the arm of Harris. Arm bar by Swinger, and Harris tries to escape. Tag to Gilbertti, who elbows the arm, they drops Harris with a punch. Harris now tries to fight back, and gets a boot to Gilbertti. He charges Gilbertti but Gilbertti gets a hammerlock and Storm saves him. Tag to Swinger, who comes off the top with an elbow to Harris’s arm. They double-team Harris in the corner, and a tag back to Gilbertti. Harris tries to fight back, off the ropes and gets a lariat to Gilbertti! He tries to tag as does Gilbertti and the BOTH DO! Storm and Swinger in now, and Storm is all over them! Back kick, and a STIFF kick to Swinger’s head. Harris is in, and he goes after Swinger, but Gilbertti saves him. Full Nelson slam to Swinger, as Gilbertti takes him to the floor. Storm is left 1 on 2. Russian leg sweep by Gilbertti. He tries an elbow, super kick to Gilbertti! Trinity goes up top, but Desire knocks her off! Harris in and spears Swinger and that is all @ 7:13.

Trinity and Desire brawl through the crowd, and the crowd likes it! Desire slams Trinity into a steel door, but Gilbertti knocks down Desire with an elbow to the lower back. Trinity gets a camel clutch variation and Desire is hurting. They set Desire on a table now, and Trinity goes to the balcony but Pat Kenny and Sonny Siaki make the save.

Pretty good match. The worked the ring well, and the NYC showed some good solid teamwork.

Scott Hudson with Kid Kash and Dallas. Kash says they aren’t going for a tag title shot. Kash says he has been discriminated against. He says he is too good, and has a bad attitude. He says from now on, TNA will find out how easy it is to get some gold. Kash tells Hudson to watch and learn.

Raven is waiting in the empty arena, and Sabu is in the locker room. Sabu sits and looks at a picture of the Original Sheik.

Match #2 Michael Shane w/ Tracy vs. Chris Sabin

Lock up to start, as the crowd chant “Hail Sabin.” Shane goes behind, but Sabin escapes with a hammerlock. Shane reverses and takes Sabin to the corner. Sabin fights back, and chops away at Shane. Reversal series, and Sabin gets a headlock take over. Shane tries to fight back up, off the ropes, and Shane escapes, but Sabin gets a GREAT RANA and Shane goes to the floor. Sabin runs, and gets a springboard plancha to the floor! Sabin rolls Shane backing the ring, as Shane Douglas goes to fins Raven. Shane in the ring, and he tries to toss Sabin out, Sabin tries to skin the cat, but Shane dropkicks him to the floor. Shane has Sabin back in the ring, and clotheslines him down for a 2 count. Shane with a neck vice now, and Sabin fights to his feet, but Shane gets a wheel barrel suplex to counter him. Shane goes up top…MISSES THE BIG ELBOW! Both men are down. Back up, and Sabin takes him down with a sweet Enziguri for 2. Shane reverses a suplex, Sabin escapes and Traci tries to interfere. Shane misses a super kick, Sabin tries the Cradle Shock, but Traci interferes again. Shane escapes and gets the super kick for the win @ 5:53.

Good match but too short. They worked the ring very well, but it left you wanting more.

Shane Douglas with Raven in the empty arena. Raven says it is good that Douglas realizes that Raven retired him years ago. Raven says he and Sabu NEVER had a singles match. The reason is that Sabu is afraid. Douglas laughs it off. Raven says he bled buckets, but Heyman always said Sabu was afraid. Raven says Sabu is terrified, and if Sabu actually comes out, he will retire.

Highlights of some recent losses by the guys in the upcoming Gut Check match.

Sonjay Dutt tries to console Sabu, but Sabu wants nothing to do with him.

Scott Hudson with David Young. Young says he shouldn’t have to earn his job. They say he is 0-53 now. Young says JJ is a genius, and he will win tonight. D Ray is still looking for the ring.

Match #3 Gut Check Challenge – D Ray 3000 vs. David Young vs. Shark Boy vs. Sonjay Dutt

Sharky and Dutt to start. Lock up, and a reversal of arm bars and Sharky takes Dutt down. Back up, and tag to Ray. Arm drag by Dutt, and another takes down Ray. Tag to Young, and he just pummels Ray. Power slam gets 2. Clothesline now, and Young gets another 2. Ray with a roll up gets 2. Cross body by Ray gets 2. Back elbow now, and Ray gets a 2 count. Young tags Sharky, and then tags Dutt. Dutt on the 2nd rope, and Sharky comes over, and we get a sun set flip power bomb suplex combo as looks on. Dutt gets an Ultimo Dragon Asai DDT. RANA to Young. Sharky gets the Deep Sea Driver to Dutt, but Young gets the spine buster to Sharky, then to Ray for a 2 count. Dutt in with a sun set flip and he pins Young @ 3:59.

Dutt goes to the back to see Sabu.

It was there. Nothing special, just to get Dutt back over and to see Young lose again.

Scott Hudson with 3 Live Krew. Konnan says they should have played God Save the Queen for JJ. Konnan has a strap match with JJ, and Konnan is the only one with a strap. BG James gets a Trailer Park Trash Match with JJ. If you can swing it, bring it. Killings says if JJ is still alive then, Killings gets JJ in a Ghetto Justice match.

Match #4 Team Canada (Bobby Rude, Eric Young and Petey Williams) w/ Scott D’more vs. Hector Garza, Jerry Lynn and Heavy Metal

They all attack each other to start. Now to the floor and D’more runs away from Lynn. Young and Garza in now, and Garza takes Young down with a clothesline. Tilt a whirl by Garza to Young. Metal in now, does a flip in, and Williams takes him down. Hip toss by metal and they both go to the floor. Press slam in the ring by Metal to Williams, as Garza and Young come in and they get dueling drop kicks to the Canadians. Lynn left, and is still chasing D’more. Garza and Metal dive over the top and gets cross bodies to the Canadians. D’more and Lynn are back, but Rude takes Lynn down. Rude goes to work, and stomps down Lynn. Rude chokes out Lynn now, then rams him to the corner. Tag to Williams, who drop kicks Lynn in the corner, and gets a 2 count. D’more chokes out Lynn, than Young comes in and kicks away at Lynn. Tag to Williams, who takes Lynn to the corner again. Lynn escapes, and gets an Alabama Slam to Williams as he tries the Canadian Destroyer. Tag to Garza and he and Metal both come in. Young thrown to the floor, Garza gets a moonsault to Young on the floor. Rude has Metal, but Metal gets a Nothernlights for 2! Lynn and Williams back in, and Lynn catapults Williams to the floor. D’more in andnails Metal with the hockey stick, and Rude gets the Canada Bomb for the win @ 7:05.

Good match. These guys did work the ring to it’s fullest. Lots of excitement, but it was just lacking something.

D’more drapes the flag over Metal, Garza gets in and they beat them down. Lynn in with the NWA Flag and he cleans house! He tries the Cradle Pile driver on Lynn, but Williams makes the save. They beat down Lynn, as D’more tears the NWA flag in half! Elix and Sabin run into make the save.

Out back, Sonjay Dutt confronted Raven. Dutt says there will be no match, because of a promise Sabu made. Raven and Dutt fight and Raven beats him down. He hand cuffs Dutt, and calls out Sabu. They show Sabu coming to check on Dutt.

Scott Hudson with JJ. JJ says it doesn’t matter what the matches are.

Match #5 Triple Jeopardy Match Jeff Jarrett © vs. Konnan, BG James and Ron “The Truth” Killings

This is a Barrio Strap match, a Trailer Park Match and a Ghetto Match.

Konnan charges JJ, and JJ gets an elbow. The first to 10 strap hits win. It is 3-3. Rolling Thunder by Konnan, face jam now, and Konnan whips JJ. 8-3 Konnan now, as JJ goes to the floor. JJ gets the strap now, and goes to whipping on Konnan. 8-7 now. JJ gets some powder, and blinds Konnan! He gets the strap, and whips Konnan more and wins @ 2:04. JJ chokes out Konnan now, as the blonde chick from last week watches on.

James is out, “Oh you didn’t’ know?” He has the grocery cart of hardcore fun. JJ charges him. Fall count anywhere. James nails JJ with a trash can lid a few times, then uses a toaster! JJ gets up and rams James with the cart. JJ on the attack, and the blonde chick is called “Mensa.” James back with trash can shots, and tosses some weapons in the ring. Back in the ring now, and JJ nails James with the trash can lid. JJ waffles him again, misses a clothesline, and James gets the Juke and Jive punches. JJ gets to the floor, but James takes JJ to the announce table. They fight on top, and JJ flies off to the safety rail. JJ moves, and James lands throat first onto the rail, and JJ pins him @ 3:17.

Here comes Killings now. Killings has a guitar, and here we go. Killings with the flying forearm, and JJ is down. Running power slam to JJ, and Killings stalks JJ. Killings does the back flip and split combo, and gets a leg lariat to JJ. JJ gets a trashcan and lays into Killings. JJ yells at Killings, and KILLS Killings with a stiff trash can lid shot. Off the ropes Killings goes, and a sleeper by JJ. Killings escapes, JJ of the ropes, Killings misses a leg lariat and JJ gets the sleeper again. Killings gets a jawbreaker, and both are down. They duke it out now, and a SKY HIGH Power Bomb to JJ! Gord Buster suplex by Killings, and he goes up top…MISSES the AX KICK! JJ to the floor, and gets the guitar and throws the ref down. EL KABONG TO THE REF! Killings rolls up JJ and another ref is out and Killings wins @ 4:34!

Blah! Just trash at it’s finest. The point was to have Killings beat JJ. But Killings looks weak, as it basically took 2 of them to wear him down.

Video of Goldi backstage. This is from her office, apparently at 3:15am. She is mad about the rumors that are spread about her. She says she is a working girl…make your own jokes. She says she wants Eric Watts’s contract. She wants Watts vs. Abyss. If Watts wins, he gets the money. If Abyss wins, Goldi gets Watts’s contract.

JJ is in the ring, as the crowd chants “1-2-3!” JJ is mad.

Tenay and West shill next week. Team NWA vs. Team Canada in a flag match. The NYC vs. Kenny and Siaki in a “Humiliation Match.” AMW will take on Monty Brown and Abyss.

Highlights of Impact are shown.

Scott Hudson with AJ Styles. AJ says he takes no one lightly. All AJ needs is a 3 second mistake. He says there is no doubt that he will be the 3 Time X Division Champion.

Highlights of the #1 Contenders match last week on Impact.

Match #6 AJ Styles vs. Frankie “The Future” Kazarian

Borash does the sweet announce job. Kazarian has his own little towel to shine the belt. He really is the coolest guy in the world.

Here we go! They talk smack, and then we get a lock up to start. AJ takes Kazarian to the corner, and lets him go. Again with the lock up, but AJ ducks out, and takes Kazarian to the mat. Kazarian escapes and gets a reverse arm bar, as the crowd chants “You still suck” to Kazarian. Kazarian still has the arm bar, but AJ pushes him off. Crowd is hot for this match. Lock up again, but AJ gets the arm bar now. He wrenches the arm and sits down and Kazarian gets the ropes. Lock it up again, and Kazarian tossed to the floor. Kazarian back in now, and Kazarian takes AJ to the corner, and AJ to the arm bar again. Kazarian reverses for one of him own, they go to the mat, and both nip up to “TNA” chants. Kick to Kazarian now by AJ, and Kazarian tries to shake it off. More kicks to Kazarian’s leg, and AJ follows with a headlock. Kazarian drops to the mat, and AJ walks right over him. Leap frog by AJ, slides under Kazarian and goes for a drop kick but he stops as Kazarian goes to the floor. AJ slings Kazarian in, and catches him for a Styles Clash, but Kazarian escapes. Kazarian off the ropes, SWEET DROP KICK by AJ! Slam by AJ, followed by a knee drop for 2. Kazarian punches away at AJ, gets an STO, but AJ takes him to the floor. AJ tries a cross body, but lands on the Apron. Kazarian slings over, and gets a DDT on the apron to AJ, and follows up with a cover for 2. AJ looks like he had his bell rung there. Suplex by Kazarian who rolls over, and punches away on AJ. Sun set flip by AJ into the Styles clash, but Kazarian escapes and gets a neck breaker on AJ. Kazarian goes up top, and gets a BIG leg drop to AJ. AJ goes to the floor, and Kazarian follows. Kazarian all over AJ now, and rolls him back in the ring. AJ tries to fight back, off the ropes, and AJ gets a corner splash to Kazarian. AJ again, but misses! Drop kick by Kazarian to AJ in the corner, and Kazarian is in control again. Kazarian takes AJ over, and applies a reverse chin lock to AJ. Kazarian picks him up now, and another drop kick to AJ. He chokes AJ over the top rope, and AJ to the floor again. Kazarian follows again, and rams AJ chest first into the ring apron. Kazarian rolls him back in, and takes AJ to the corner. AJ catches Kazarian on the ropes, and Kazarian is hung over the top rope. They fight in the corner, Kazarian climbs…AJ follows. They battle up top…and fall to the apron. They battle back up top again and AJ gets a SUPLEX TO KAZARIAN TO THE FLOOR! Both men are down, and they try to climb back in the ring. AJ is in, and so is Kazarian. Kazarian looks to be in legit pain from that bump. They duke it out now with some STIFF shots! AJ gets a hangman’s neck breaker for 2! Kazarian tries the Back to the Future, but AJ escapes and gets the Bicycle kick! AJ sets for the Styles Clash, but Kazarian kicks him away, and rolls him up for 2! Kazarian gets a Stiff kick for 2! Kazarian sets AJ up top…tries a RAN, but AJ catches him, Kazarian escapes again, FUTURE SHOCK TO AJ! ONLY 2! Kazarian has AJ and HE wants the Styles Clash. AJ fights now, discus clothesline to Kazarian! AJ goes up top, but Kazarian gets a super kick to AJ! Kazarian goes up top…AJ fights out, but Kazarian has him…NO! AJ shoves him off! SPIRAL TAP TO KAZARIAN! (which kinda misses) THAT IS ALL @ 19:25. AJ STYLES IN THE NEW CHAMPION!

Dallas is out! He attacks AJ, but AJ escapes. Kid Kash is out, and he lays out AJ with the steel pipe. He and Dallas beat down AJ now, Dallas slams AJ down, and Kash delivers the Frog Splash to AJ! Kash grabs the belt, and stands tall over AJ.

Great Main Event. It is usually a treat when the X Division and AJ Styles is featured in the Main Event, and this was no acceptation. Great way to end the show.

For those of you that don’t know what the spiral tap is, let me break out the Zonka-Strator and explain.

Ok, of the picture is shown correctly, AJ is the man on top in Lime. He leaps off, and spins a bunch then lands in a senton on top of the blue Kazarian.

This has been the Zonka-Strator for this week.

It wasn’t the best of shows, but wasn’t bad. The JJ vs. 3LK stuff was annoying, but it looks as if they are building for Killings to be the one to beat JJ. The Main Event was a great match, and it looks as if Kid Kash will be AJ’s new nemesis. Remember to check out IMPACT this Friday, and help support another show for us to watch. Don’t forget, I will be back with the Best Damn TNA Recap Ver. 2 as well!

Thanks for reading, until next time I am Larry Csonka and you know you want to be a Zonkamaniac~!