wrestling / TV Reports

411’s WWE Raw Report 6.07.10

June 7, 2010 | Posted by Ronnie LaFianza

-Here we go. We kick things off immediately with Bret Hart’s music playing. Here comes Bret Hart and Teddy Long. Coleslaw welcomes us in. Hart welcomes us to the very first ever Viewers Choice Edition of Monday Night Raw. For the first time ever, we can go to WWE.com to vote for the matches and stipulations. Teddy thanks Bret for inviting him to Raw. They know that the WWE Universe is in control of wrestlers from both Raw and Smackdown, and we can even decide the fate of the WWE Championship. Everyone who is involved in the Fatal Four Way for the WWE Championship is in action tonight, and we decide who their opponents are. Teddy wants to talk about Randy Orton. Here comes the man himself though.

Orton comes out with the sling on. We get a recap of Edge taking out Orton’s shoulder last week. He says he wants Bret to forget about the Viewers Choice as he has a choice for Bret. He wants Edge, and he wants him tonight. Either Bret will give him to him, or Orton’s gonna find him and take care of him himself. Edge thinks he can take him out, well Orton’s gonna make sure he takes Edge with him. Edge comes out on the stage.

Edge says lets give Orton what he wants, so he can finish what he started. Teddy interrupts him. He whispers something in Bret’s ear. Bret says he likes that. Since it’s Viewers Choice, they’re gonna let everyone in the arena decide. Teddy says it’s going to be Miami’s choice tonight. Edge will face Orton in either a debate, a sit up contest, or a match where one of Edge’s arms is tied behind his back. Edge says no and that Teddy can’t do that. Bret runs down the options. The crowd surprisingly likes the match the most (I personally would have gone with the debate). The people have spoken. Bret wishes Edge luck as Edge walks off. Teddy now introduces the first Viewer’s Choice match of the night. Chris Jericho vs The Big Show. We will decide what type of match they will have. A Over the Top Rope Challenge, a Submission match, or a Body Slam Challenge. Oh boy. Go to WWE.com right now to cast your vote, and when we come back, the results will be revealed. Here comes Big Show right now as we head to commercial.

-We’re back and Cole and Lawler run down the stipulations. Matt Striker is at ringside with the results. Striker says it’s time to find out what we chose. Body Slam Challenge wins with 48%. Show looks happy.

Match 1 : Big Show vs Chris Jericho – Body Slam Challenge

Jericho looks pretty scared. Show waves to Jericho before they get started. Show wants a hug. Jericho slaps him. Headbutt by Show and here we go. Show with the chops in the corner. Jericho avoids Show in the corner. Jericho goes for a slam but Show clubs him in the back. Another headbutt by Show. Show signals for the punch. Jericho bails out. Show grabs him by the hair and lifts him onto the apron. Jericho drapes the arm over it. Jericho locks the arm up in the apron now and starts tugging on it. Show pushes him off, and Jericho dropkicks the arm. Jericho now kicking the arm. Now he’s punching it. Show goozles Jericho. Jericho rakes the eyes and goes to the second rope. Show chops Jericho on the way down. Jericho goes for a crossbody but gets caught. Slam by Show and it’s over.

Winner : Big Show (It’s a body slam challenge. I don’t know what else to say)

Show locks in that modified camel clutch. Jericho’s tapping out. It’s said that Show has now won by submission? What the hell? I’m confused. Show now tosses Jericho over the top. Show’s music plays him off.

-We get a shot of Miami as Cole and Lawler hype up another match. The Hart Dynasty will either face John and Jey Uso, the Dudebusters, or Great Khali and Hornswoggle.

We hear from the Uso’s. They say they’ve left the Dynasty laid out for the past two weeks. The Dudebusters say we’ll become better people by voting for them. Khali raises his hands high, and so does Hornswoggle.

-We’re back and Lawler hypes up some WWE.com thing where WWE Superstars talk about their High School memories. Can’t miss stuff.

-Khali and Hornswoggle win with 54% of the vote. Oh god.

Match 2 : Unified Tag Team Champions The Hart Dynasty (w/ Natalya) vs The Great Khali and Hornswoggle

Khali and Kidd start things off. Kidd with the kicks to the leg, but runs right into a clothesline. Khali throws Kidd into the corner. Elbow by Khali followed by a chop. Delayed slam by Khali follows. Khali tags in Hornswoggle. He goes to the top. Tadpole Splash misses. David takes out Khali. Tyson covers Hornswoggle and that’s all.

Winners : The Hart Dynasty (I honestly don’t know what to say other than this match did not need to take place at all. This was a lame excuse for getting Hornswoggle on TV)

Post match sees the Uso’s run out, and we have a massive brawl. Hart Dynasty comes out on top though as they send the Uso’s packing.

-Lawler says he has a problem. He gets up and leaves. Cole has no idea what’s going on. Cole talks about the Undertaker and a recap of Smackdown follows.

-We come back and Cole says the cast of the A-Team is here next.

-We’re back and Justin Robert introduces the cast of the A-Team. Everyone except Liam Neeson. Cooper comes out first. He says he was supposed to be joined by Rampage and Copley, but he doesn’t know where they are. He plugs the movie and says they’ve got a great show in store for tonight, and walks off. Well at least we know he’s in the building.

-We see King backstage, saying he’s looking for somebody. Rampage and Copley take him into a room. Rampage and Copley say King’s an officer. King says someones stolen his crown. Copley says they’ll retrieve it. Rampage says he watches Raw all the time, and says he thinks he know who dunnit. They leave and walk right into the Bella’s. Rampage says he’s BA. Copley says he’s Murdoch. They walk off. One of the Bella’s say they loved District 9. Copley says he never saw it, but thought it was greatly acted and other stuff.

-Here comes Santino Marella. Marella’s going to face Kozlov in either a match, arm wrestling competition, or a dance off.

-Dance Competition wins by 84% (I think).

-Santino says he was Backstreet Boy #6, so this one is in the Banks.

Match 3 : Santino Marella vs Vladimir Kozlov – Dance Competition

I don’t know if this is a match, but I’m going to count it as one. Santino starts and does some weird stuff. Some rolls, a split, a Carlton like dance, the Cobra, and some other weird stuff. I can’t believe I’m recapping this. Vladimir says something in Russian. He then says he’s more strong and faster. Here comes Kozlov. Remember when this guy was facing Triple H for the WWE Championship. I didn’t thnik so. God this is weird. Vintage Kozlov. I don’t even know how to recap that. Striker asks the crowd who one. Santino, for the first time in months, gets booed. They cheer Kozlov. Striker declares him the winner. He and Kozlov do some weird shit, Santino spins around like an idiot. He tells Kozlov to catch him and he jumps at Kozlov. Kozlov hits him with a headbutt to the chest that lays Santino out.

Winner : Vladimir Kozlov (I don’t know what to say)

-We see the Diva’s backstage. We’re going to have to vote for either a 6 on 6 tag match, battle royal or champion vs champion.

-We get a recap of NXT. Tomorrow night is the season premier of NXT Season 2.

-We’re back, and here comes the Diva’s as they all line up on the stage. Lawler calls our attention to the titantron as we await the results. The Battle Royal wins with 73%.

Match 4 : Diva’s Battle Royal

All of the Diva’s are in the ring. I hate recapping Battle Royals. Massive brawl to start things off. The Bella’s catapult Rosa through the ropes, thus eliminating her. Tiffany with mounted punches to Michelle in the corner. Layla runs up and pushes her out. Michelle and Layla work down Kelly in the middle of the ring. Kelly goes for the float over, but Layla pushes her onto the apron. Michelle eliminates Kelly. Hurricanrana by Gail to Alicia. Alicia sets up Gail on the ropes. Gail with a hurricanrana, eliminating herself and Alicia. The Bella’s eliminated simultaneously by Team Laycool. Eve with clotheslines, taking out Laycool. This is getting really sloppy. Eve throws Layla into Michelle, eliminating them both. It’s down to Maryse, Jillian and Eve. Maryse and Jillian work down Eve. Eve tries to fight them off but can’t. Eve gets eliminated in anti climatic fashion. Jillian and Maryse high five. Maryse kicks her in the gut and throws her out.

Winner : Maryse (And the single Vince Heads continue. I hate Battle Royals, and this was really sloppy to boot)

-Cole and Lawler recap the happenings of the night. Oh man, I forgot this was 3 hours. They talk about how it’s Edge vs Orton tonight.

-We see Sheamus walking in the back. He sees Kane. Kane says the fact Sheamus isn’t on Smackdown means nothing to him. Because he took out Triple H, he thinks he may have taken out Undertaker too. Sheamus says if he did take out Undertaker, he would brag about it. When he took out Triple H, he made sure everyone was watching. He doesn’t do sneak attacks (Wait, what? Didn’t he take out Triple H from behind at Extreme Rules?). Kane says he doesn’t take kindly to liars and hopes he sees Sheamus again real soon.

-Sheamus is going to face either Kane, Mark Henry or Evan Bourne tonight.

-TobyMac’s “Showstopper” is the theme song for Fatal Four Way.

-We get a recap of the main event of last week. 88% for Kane. Wow, Bourne got like 9%. That sucks.

Match 5 : Sheamus vs Kane

Kane with a knee and an uppercut to start. He throws Sheamus to the outside and works him down out there. Kane throws him back in the ring and goes to the top. Sheamus crotches him. He then hits him with a running powerslam. Pin but only two. That’s the first pin of the night that’s had a kick out. This match will continue as we go to commercial.

We’re back and Sheamus takes Kane down. Pin but only two. Sheamus with a crossbow submission. Kane counters and hits a boot to the face of Sheamus. Uppercut by Kane, and he follows up with rights. Clothesline in the corner, and he hits a sidewalk slam. Basement dropkick to the face of Sheamus. Pin but only two. Kane goes up to the top. Clothesline connects. He goozles Sheamus. Sheamus fights out but gets goozled again. Sheamus counters and hits a reverse DDT/backbreaker type move. Kane avoids a Bicycle Kick and throws Sheamus to the outside. Sheamus gets back in but gets goozled again. Chokeslam connects. Sheamus rolls to the outside though. The count is on. Sheamus gets on the apron but decides that he’s had enough. That’s enough for the count out victory for Kane. Kane is pissed.

Winner : Kane (Finally, a watchable match. This wasn’t bad, actually it was kind of better than I expected, but it was still too short to be anything better)

-Lawler and Cole hype up the match between Orton and Edge. It’ll be Edge with one hand tied behind his back. John Cena will face either Jack Swagger, Rey Mysterio, or CM Punk. That actually sounds good.

-We come back to a video package of Wade Barrett. We get a interview with him now. Wade says that the result of the show was never in question, and just the start of something greater. He said that in one weeks time, he’s going to accomplish something that no one has accomplished in the entire history of the WWE.

-Dibiase is with Virgil, saying he should be running the show. Rampage and Copley interrupt, accusing Dibiase of stealing the crown. Dibiase asks why they think he would want some stupid crown. Copley stops Virgil, and says he’s going to bring out the lie detector test. Rampage gets in his face, and says he’s the test. He’s going to punch him in the face until he tells the truth. IRS says that the crown is his now since Lawler didn’t pay his taxes. Dibiase says he knows they’re the A-Team. There’s a gas. They all put on gas masks. Copley says he’s immune to gas and passes out while the other guys run away. Wait, what the fuck was that?

-R-Truth will team with either Christian, MVP or Morrison while Miz will team with Ziggler, Regal or Ryder as they face off in tag action.

-We’re back, and here comes R-Truth. Truth says the fans are what’s up. It’s up to the fans to pick his tag team partner. He wants to know who it is. Here we go. Is it Christian…MVP…or John Morrison. And it’s…. John Morrison with 54%. Say what? I’m a Morrison fan, but I thought it would’ve been Christian for sure.

-We see King vote for William Regal. AWESOME!!! Here comes The Miz. Miz congratulates R-Truth. They also voted for Khali and Hornswoggle to tag, and then for Kozlov to dance. They obviously don’t know what they want. He doesn’t care who his partner is, because he’s going to beat Truth, and then the first chance he gets, he’s taking back his title. He’s The Miz, and he’s AWESOME!!! Is it Dolph Ziggler…William Regal…or Zack Ryder. 45% for Zack Ryder. That’s kind of surprising although I’m pretty sure these votes are fixed, but still.

Match 6 : John Morrison and United States Champion R-Truth vs Zack Ryder and The Miz

Miz and Truth start things off. Tie up to start, and Miz throws Truth to the mat. Truth ducks under, jumps over and hits a hiptoss. Tag to Morrison. Double hip toss to Miz. Tag back to Truth as they hit Miz with a double suplex. Pin but only two. Truth gets distracted and turns right into a fucking nasty boot to the jaw. DDT by Ryder. Pin but only two. Tag back to Miz. Huge kick to the gut by Miz. Miz then boots Truth in the head. Pin but only two. He now locks Truth in a sleeper. Truth fights out and hits a backsuplex. Miz grabs Truth’s leg, but gets pushed off and lost his shoe in the process. Hot tag to Morrison. Clotheslines to Miz and he hits that flying kick. Huge knee to the jaw of Miz. Pin but Ryder breaks it up.Truth takes it to Ryder, and then Miz. Ryder backdrops Truth over the top. Flying Chuck to Ryder. Miz avoids Morrison in the corner and the Skull Crushing Finale connects. Forget about it.

Winners : The Miz and Zack Ryder (Alright match here. It wasn’t anything great, but it wasn’t bad. Miz and Ryder seem like a natural fit as a team due to their gimmicks, but Miz really doesn’t need to be put back in the tag division)

-We see Edge complaining to Bret in the back. Kane gets in Bret’s face and asks if he took out Undertaker. HAHAHAHAHAHA!! Seriously? Do they expect us to believe a 50 year, almost crippled Bret Hart took out a 300 plus pound active wrestler? Kane said Bret came back for closure. Was it jealousy or was it that Taker’s legend has surpassed Bret’s. If he finds out it was Bret, he will be in a vegetative state, just like Undertaker.

-We’re back, and here comes Edge.

Match 7 : Edge vs Randy Orton

The stipulation to this match is that Edge will have one arm tied behind his back. We get a recap of Orton RKOing Edge last week, only to later be taken out by Edge. Orton comes out with a sling on. The ref ties Edge’s left arm behind his back.

Orton goes for a shot, but Orton ducks. Both guys with a feeling out process. Orton dodges a boot and hits a clothesline. And another. Orton with the stomps all over Edge now. He drops a knee to the face. Orton wants to finish this early. He goes for a RKO, but Edge pushes him off and hits a clothesline. Edge undoes the rope and starts to beat Orton down in the corner. He refuses to stop. The ref calls it.

Winner : Randy Orton (This was used purely to advance the rivalry between these two. I’ve got no complaints)

Edge doesn’t seem to care though. He wants a Spear. Orton counters with a kick to the chest, and then boots Edge out of the ring. Orton goes after him. Edge hits Orton in the arm with a chair. He then hits Orton in the back of the shoulder with a chair. Edge walks off as Orton screams in pain.

-Cole and Lawler recap the happenings of the night for like the 8th time. They hype the Cena match before we go to commercial.

-We see Cena in the back with Bourne. Bourne thanks Cena, but Cena thanks him, because Bourne showed him he’s one of the toughest and most energizing superstars. Savannah asks him about not knowing who is opponent is tonight. Cena say’s his life is crazy right now, as everything is in question as of late. The fans make decisions that are fair and true. Cena says he feels good, because he’s not gonna have to wait and see if his name is gonna be called. He fells good because the Cenation is about to see what he does on Monday Night Raw.

-We see Copley in the back, not knowing what happened. Mean Gene asks him the same thing. He calls him Charcoal. Copley says he lost B.A. Gene says he’s a well respected actor, B.A. is gone, and he’s got a problem. Copley says his resilience to gas is not what it used to be. Gene says he’s got a chance to outshine the original. Gene says the clown that replaced him is horrible. Matthews is standing right behind him. Gene says he’s got a chance to blow the television show right out the water. Copley thanks him and runs off. Gene calls Matthews a loser.

-Oh good, here comes Drew McIntyre.

We see Teddy on the big screen. He reminds us that it’s Viewer’s Choice night. Drew will either face Yoshi Tatsu…Goldust…or a mystery opponent (who’s clearly Matt Hardy).

-We’re back, and Striker directs us to the titantron. 88% for the mystery man. And it’s Matt Hardy. Hardy shouts out we got em’. Here we go.

Match 8 : Drew McIntyre vs Matt Hardy

Hardy looks pissed. Drew tells the ref to back him up and that the match is not happening. He says Hardy is suspended, and Drew made sure of that. Teddy comes out. He says Matt Hardy was suspended from Smackdown, but not Raw, so this match is going to take place.

Hardy with a huge right, and here we go. Hardy takes down Drew and hits him with the rights. The ref pulls Hardy off. Hardy clotheslines Drew over the top. He then slams him into the announce table. He then throws Drew into the barricade, and then into the ring post. Back in the ring now as Hardy runs right into a boot to the face. Matt avoids Drew in the corner as Drew flyis into the ring post shoulder first. TWIST OF FATE!! It’s over!!!

Winner : Matt Hardy (The match was nothing more than a squash, but it advanced the angle between these two and Hardy finally gets the upper hand for once. Good enough for me)

Matt’s not done as he’s slamming Drew’s head into the mat. He shoves the ref off him and won’t stop. He pulls out some of Drew’s hair as Drew bails out.

-We see Rampage in the back handcuffed to a chair. Dibiase, Virgil, and IRS have kidnapped him. Dibiase says Rampage will get his answers and that they’re going to the ring.

-We’re back and Rampage is handcuffed to the ropes. Dibiase says B.A. is probably wondering why they’re doing this. He says because everyone has a price, even him (Dibiase). Someone called Dibiase and said that someone wanted B.A. on a silver plater. Dibiase named his price, and cashed in. WAIT!! RODDY PIPER IN DA HOUSE!!!

Here comes Piper. He says B.A. Baracus. Somethings up with his mic. He says at the first Wrestlemania, all he heard was the A-Team was the hottest show on television and that Mr. T was the biggest star in the world. Well he silenced Mr. T. And now, you, Mr. T. He has to start all over again. A-Team, the movie. The biggest movie this movie this summer. He says everyone is asking Piper if he’s gonna see the A-Team. No, he’s not. Because every time you think you got all the answers, he changes the questions. He’s going to do the whole world a favor. He’s going to beat the mow hawk of Mr. Bad Attitude tonight, because he pities the fool who messes with Hot Rod. But wait. Here comes Copley, being ridden to the ring by Dusty Rhodes and Mean Gene. Rampage fights IRS and Virgil off, and then breaks the handcuffs (it was clearly a prop). SPINEBUSTER TO DIBIASE!! Dusty with the elbow to IRS. Rampage chokeslams Virgil down. Mean Gene congratulates the A-Team. He asks them how they did it. Copley says it was because of Mean Gene. He says he thought of Dusty Rhodes, so he called him. Dusty says it’s great when a plan comes together. They all raise their hands to finally end this.

-Cole hypes up the Cena match again as we head to commercial.

-Next week, Mark Feuerstein of Royal Pains gust hosts.

-King tries to vote for Mysterio, but his computer’s frozen. He finally got it.

-We’re in the back with all three guys. Matthews asks Rey why he thinks he should be competing with Cena. Rey says Cena’s the top dog on Raw, and he’s the top dog on Smackdown, and that he can beat Cena. Swagger says that it’s World Champ vs World Champ, it’s Monday Night vs Friday Night. He lives for matches like this. CM Punk says Matthews always asks the stupidest questions. Punk asks why Cena would want to face the Straight Edge Savior. Punk says it’s because he can make Cena a better person. He will defeat John Cena, and he will join the SES, and the entire universe will know that Straightedge means he’s better than you.

-Punk wins the poll!!! I didn’t catch the percentage, but I’m kind of surprised Punk actually won.

Match 9 : WWE Champion John Cena vs CM Punk (w/ Serena and Luke Gallows)

Tie up to start. Cena tries to rip off the mask, and Punk bails out. Punk gets back in and kicks the legs. Headlock by Punk. Cena pushes him off and hits a shoulder block. Loud “You Can’t Wrestle” chant. Cena with a takedown and he locks in the sleeper. Punk flips Cena over and locks in a headlock. Cena with a leg scissors but Punk fights his way out. Cena goes for the mask and Punk again bails out. Punk gets back in and kicks Cena in the gut. Knees by Punk now, and now shoulder blocks in the corner. Snapmare by Punk, and he dropkicks Cena in the back of the head. Pin but Cena kicks out. Punk wraps the legs around John’s head for a submission. Cena fights out into a STF attempt, but Punk’s too close to the ropes. Cena ducks a clothesline and hits the rights. Bulldog by Cena. He runs off the ropes but Gallows trips the leg as we head to commercial.

We’re back and Punk has Cena in a sleeper. Cena counters into a FU attempt, but Punk counters that into a DDT. Pin but only two. Punk now throws Cena out of the ring. Serena punts him in the gut. Punk with a kick to the back. Punk now throws Cena back to the inside. Kick to the chest, and then one to the back. Punk kicking Cena all over. Cena with the huge blows to Punk. Shoulder block 1 connects, shoulder block 2 connects, and there’s the slam. Wade Barrett comes out now. Cena hits Punk with the Five Knuckle Shuffle. Attitude Adjustment coming up, but Cena lets Punk down as Barrett slowly walks to the ring.

Winner : No Contest (Alright match here, but it was used to set up the post match)

Wait, the NXT Rookies are everywhere, and they’re taking out the SES. They surround the ring as Cena stands alone. They all make their way in. This is awesome. Otunga kicks the ref to the outside. Cena goes after one of them, and they’re all beating down Cena. They’re all beating down Cena. Skip boots Matt Striker. Gabriel and Slater take out Lawler. Slater is going ape shit. Sheffield knocks the announce table over. Young is destroying the barricade. He just took out the time keeper. Some guy runs out but they take him out. This is madness. The rookies are now taking the ring apart, literally. They’re pulling apart the ring ropes and taking the canvas off. Cena tries to fight back but Tarver takes him out. Otunga with the spinebuster to Cena. Slater picks Cena up and throws him into a clothesine by Darren Young. Young picks up Cena and throws him into a clothesline from Slater. Punk tries to take them out, but gets beaten down. Slater and Young pick Cena up and throw him into a huge clothesline from Sheffield. Slater grabs the ring rope and tries to choke Cena with it. Bryan yells at Cena, saying Cena’s not better than him. Bryan then hits Cena with a huge kick to the back. Barrett picks Cena up and hits that rolling fireman’s carry slam. 450 by Gabriel connects. All of the rookies now leave the ring as Cena plays dead in the ring. The medics come in to check up on him. They bring out a stretcher and put John onto it. We get a shot of around ring side, and there are bodies everywhere. John gets pushed out by the medics. He gives a thumbs up as he’s being rolled out. That’s how we’re gonna end it. So, for as bad as Raw was, this was a pretty awesome way to end it.


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Ronnie LaFianza

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