wrestling / TV Reports
Ciocco’s AEW Dynamite Review 2.19.25
Image Credit: AEW
Loading...SICKOS! How are we tonight? No, don’t refresh your browser, it really is me back on my usual night and time, after filling in on Grand Slam this past Saturday turned Sunday. Speaking of said show, how can AEW Dynamite stack up to such an awesome event held in the land down under? Well, we have a culmination of the issues between Big Bill and Powerhouse Hobbs, as these two men will battle it out in a street fight. We also have the return of Captain Cool himself, Orange Cassidy, as he will face off with Roderick Strong, with the winner going on to face Kazuchika Okada for the Continental Title next week, and then that person going on to face Kenny Omega at Revolution.
(Sounds a touch convoluted, don’t it?)
We also have the newly minted group The Opps going up against Christian Cage and his Patriarchy, Megan Bayne facing off with Kris Statlander, MJF, and Hangman Page face-to-face, and of course, so much more!
So, how are my Sickos going tonight? I have to be honest, I once said (more than half my lifetime ago) that if I ever made it to age 40, I would have felt like I did something impressive. And, unless something happens between now and 12:01 AM on Saturday, I will in fact get to that age. It truly is crazy how time flies and how things always change, sometimes for the better, and sometimes for the worse, but in the end, all you can do is continue to live your best life and never let anything keep you down.
BAH, enough of my cracking wise, that is not why you’re here, right? You’re here to light up that comment section and enjoy some awesome AEW action, so let’s go!
We are LIVE from Phoenix, Arizona! Our commentators are Excalibur, Ian Riccaboni, and Taz!
Maxwell Jacob Friedman is here, and that can only mean one thing. The face-to-face is going to open us up.
Hangman Page has arrived, and we’re told that there will be massive fines if these two lay hands on each other.
(I mean, yeah? They’re both well paid, so would it even matter?)
The most useful security staff of all time, AEW Security, is around ringside. What are the odds that they get beaten up instead?
COWBOY SHIT chants. MJF throws his gum at someone at ringside. LOL. MJF doesn’t speak poor, he’s talking. The year was 2019, the first-ever event in the history of this company was Double or Nothing. The first match was the Casino Battle Royale, with the winner going on to become the inaugural champion. Max had the match won, but Page screwed him. Page cheap shotted him like a gutless little worm. MJF scratched and clawed his way to the top, and he did so by beating some of the biggest names in the industry. Your favorite wrestler? Beat him! But who did MJF beat for his first Dynamite Diamond Ring? OH, it was Page! He’s now a six-time Dynamite Diamond Ring winner. He headlined and won the biggest show in AEW history. The best and longest reigning AEW Champion of all time. A former International Champion. (Doesn’t he mean Amercian Champion?) And do you know why? Because my name is Maxwell Jacob Friedman, and I am better than you, and you know it!
Page wants to know why he’s talking to him like he doesn’t know who he is. Page knows what he has done. He’s already making history at age 28. But he sounded angry. All of that, and you can’t be happy. Is it because there is something you still haven’t been able to win? From them?
SHUT YOUR MOUTH! MJF says he doesn’t give a damn about the fans. He thinks it is funny how these hypocrites decide who are morally redeemable. These schmucks woke up and decided Page should be the main character? You! The guy who drank a man’s blood? The guy who attacked veterans in the locker room? The guy who drove a syringe through a man’s face? The man who burned someone’s house down to ash? But he’s the good guy? YAY! Hangman did nothing wrong!
(They censor Max saying Cowboy Shit, but not the fans lol)
Everyone loves Hangman! But Max has a question for him. After everything you have done, do you love you? Did you love yourself after you ended the career of Christopher Daniels?
Hangman has lost his mind. Daniels is ten times the man that MJF will ever be. He would rip out his spine and give it to him. If there had been a wrestling company in this lifetime, he gave his life to it. He went out fighting, and he knows CD wouldn’t have it any other way. He took care of wrestling even when it didn’t take care of him. He is the best of all of us, and it’s men and women like him that we can stand in this ring tonight. FALLEN ANGEL chants. It is that selflessness and humility that you don’t understand. If you’re career ended tonight, what would they say about you? Would they say that you are a credit to our sport? Or were you an opportunist? A selfish coward? Taking shortcuts to chase power? You ask why after everything that I have done, that these people still care about me. Page can’t speak for the fans, and he won’t put words in their mouths. He knows what is right, and what is wrong. He has lied a hundred times in five years, but he never lied to the fans. He has faced problems head-on, eye to eye. Page hasn’t run and hasn’t hidden. He worked for everything. The World Title. The tag titles. He worked for it. Max has spent five years scheming, using people. Page hopes that for once, for your sake, there is a small part of you that is wondering, is it true? Because it’s not. And deep down, Max knows it.
Max laughs, oh my god! Are you a child? Aw, I’m sorry, did I not win fantasy squares on my way to the top? The history books don’t give a damn how you got it done. He’s earned everything, but he can’t say the same about Page. The powers that be decided to prop Hangman up. He walked in here in 2019 with all the buzz. Max just needed a scarf and a mic. You have earned nothing. He walks better, dresses better, and he is better.
Page says he is real and drops the mic. Max says you can be the main character all you want, he has no problem being the bad guy. He drops his mic as the two men face off and then back up. Here comes Security to the apron. Max puts his hands up, stops at the ropes, and turns around again. MJF spit on Page. Ew gross lol. Hangman goes to jump MJF, but he escapes the ring. Security then proceeds to get the beat down. Well, call me surprised.
Christopher Daniels is here. This is what he was fighting for the whole time. Don’t listen to MJF. He knows who you are, and Page knows who he is. Hangman leaves the ring as Daniels helps up one of the guards. Daniels takes a look around on the ramp, as Excalibur runs down our card for tonight.
(Well, that was a fun exchange. Obviously, hardly anyone can match MJF on the mic, and Page can’t, but he did it in a different way and was effective.)
Video package highlighting the sights and sounds from Grand Slam Australia this past Saturday/Sunday!
(I mean, say what you want about Cope (Just Cope), but the fans singing Metallingus, chills!)
Christian Cage and the Patriarchy are here for their 6-man match!
Renee Paquette is back after the break with The Undisputed Kingdom. Roddy speaks. ORANGE! It seems like they are destined to do this forever. He knows that Orange is friends with Kyle, but he is going to beat him. O’Reilly says that the Conglomeration is a lifestyle, but Roddy is going to have to break that back. Cole says that Roddy is the better man, he might like Orange, but Roddy is the man, that is undisputed.
Back to the ring, here come the Opps, and our match is underway!
The Patriarchy W/Mother Wayne vs. The Opps
Shibata and Sabian start us off. Shibata works wrist control and a hammerlock. Sabian tries to match it, but Shibata isn’t having it and hits Sabian with a kitchen sink. Tag to Joe, and him and Shibata chop away at Sabian. Joe with the casual trip, and a backsplash senton. Nick Wayne tries his luck, but he suffers the same fate. Joe stares down Cage. Christian finds tagging in, but he tags right back out to Wayne. LOL! Joe takes Wayne to their corner and pounds him out. Shibata in, now HOOK. Wayne is getting the business lol. Shibata back in, snapmare into a chin lock. Shibata thinking PK, but Cage trips him up, and Sabian elbows Shibata. Fisherman Buster by Wayne for a two-count. PIP Break.
-Don’t care about the Impractical Athletes.
-AEW Collision, on TNT and Max in case you forgot!
-Detect this: you shouldn’t take what you are allergic to!
-Can we replace this guy with the Passive Progressive ads?
-Something about that Shiba commercial kind of pisses me off.
-Novocaine, he can’t feel pain!
-Gronk does Pizza Hut! Take that, Am-Aron and George and their Little Caeser’s!
-Advil the pain and your liver away!
-Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh ohhhhh oh oh, oh oh!
We’re back, as the Patriarchy was in charge during the break, but Shibata has fought back. Sabian and Wayne try to keep Shibata away from his corner. Double Irish whip, but Shibata hooks the ropes and takes both men out. HOOK is in now. Clotheslines for all! Overhead suplexs for all! Cage in, but he gets sent to the floor. Northern Lights bridge by HOOK on Wayne for a two-count. Fisherman’s Counter by Wayne. Everyone does their stuff now! Joe FLIES through the ropes and kills Cage dead. Wayne rolls HOOK through and holds the ropes for a two. Wayne’s World attempt, but HOOK catches him with the Red Rum! Cage runs away lol! Wayne gives it up!
WINNER: The Opps
TIME: 9:45
THOUGHTS: Not a bad match, fairly paint by the numbers, but I loved Cage being afraid of the Opps and then leaving when Wayne was in trouble. It fits lol.
RATING: ***
The Opps celebrate post-match, as Excalibur tells us that MJF and Hangman are official for Revolution! Taz calls the Opps the Hops. I think we could go somewhere with this.
“THOSE OPPS GOT THE HOPS!”
Coming up next, Big William and Powerhouse William face off in a street fight!
COMMERCIALS!
We’re back, as we see highlights from ROH Global Wars this past Monday. Bandido pinned Chris Jericho. To the here and now with Renee and Jericho. Did he accomplish what he set out to do getting pinned by Bandido at Global Wars? Wipe that smirk off your face, Renee. No Chris Jericho, no AEW. He gets treated with disrespect and vitriol. Why is that? He is a nine-time champion across all companies. They ask Jericho for a picture, but they hand the camera to Bandido. Congratulations, he is going to give Bandido a shot at the ROH Title this Saturday. Forget the bounty, he has the chance to do this himself. He is going to show him that people are getting too comfortable around Chris (BLEEPING) Jericho.
DO THE TITLE CHANGE, YOU COWARDS!
To Justin Roberts! He lets us know that anything goes in this following match. Thanks, Justin!
Street Fight: Powerhouse Hobbs vs. Big Bill
Hobbs walks to Bill as he approaches the ring, but Bill kicks him in the face. Not a smart start there, Hobbs.
This fight quickly goes up the steps. Both men come back down the stairs, and Hobbs clotheslines Bill back over the barricade. Hobbs rams Bill into the barricade twice. On the third try, Bill hits Hobbs with a soundboard. Bill grabs an Allen Wrench and proceeds to hit the steps, the barricade, and then the ring post. Swinging like Aaron Judge there lol. Hobbs takes advantage and wallops Bill with a steel chair. Bill still had the wrench, though, and finally hits Hobbs in the face with it. WE WANT TABLE chants, as Bill flips off the fans. Remember when the fans were into Bill? Yeah, me either.
Hobbs tries to get to his feet, but Bill hits him with a big boot. Hobbs is busted open, as Bill lifts Hobbs up and hits a chokeslam on the ring steps! PIP Break.
-Has anyone watched Common Side Effects? What do you think of it?
-Sonic has a lot of good values.
-Suits LA are back.
-Not the right Progressive commercial, but better than the guy who knows it all.
Quick break is over. as Bill sets up a table in the ring with help from Bryan Keith. Hobbs is back in the ring, though, and drops Bill with a trash can. Another shot to the head of Bill. Hobbs rips his tank-top off. MEAT chants. Hobbs has Bill up, but here is Keith with a chair. Hobbs punches the chair away, as Keith looks scared. The Bad Apple gets a one-hand chokeslam through the table. Damn! But Bill takes advantage and clotheslines Hobbs to the ramp. MEAT FOREVER chants, as Hobbs catches Bill and hits the World’s Strongest Slam. Hobbs has the backpack that Big Bill had and hits Bill with it. Hobbs empties out the backpack and we have pieces of bricks on the ramp. Hobbs hammers away on Bill as we get POWERHOUSE chants. Bill to his feet, punches earn a universal MEAT chant. Hobbs breaks that with a kick to the gut. He slams Bill’s head off of the ring steps ten times in total. Both men on the ring steps. HOBBS THROWS BILL OFF THE STEPS AND OFF THE STAGE AND THROUGH THE BARB WIRE TABLE AT RINGSIDE! Bill is caught in the barb wire, and he cannot make the ten count!
WINNER: Powerhouse Hobbs
TIME: 10:40
THOUGHTS: Big men doing big men stuff and having a good street fight. Hobbs needed the win more if they plan to push him again to the main event scene.
RATING: ***1/2
To the back, Renee has the Murder Machines. Renee says showing up the tag team champions was bold. Cage says bold indeed. They wanted to talk business with the Hurt Syndicate, but surprise, they’re nowhere to be found. Archer says that they are going to take the titles from them. EVERYBODY DIES!
Justin Roberts in the ring, we are returning with Double or Nothing on May 25th in Glendale, Arizona!
Roll the cameras and set the stage, because TIMELESS Toni Storm is here, with Luther in tow! Oh, no, he’s gone now lol.
The lights dim as Toni takes center stage. This whore, this slut, this tramp, is your new champion. On the other side of the world, she faced the Woman from Hell, the woman who broke her heart, took her title and ruined her soul. Mariah May, you sick bitch! But Storm is proud of her, because she gave her the fight of her life, and she beat her with her small package. They say the best things come in small packages, but you should have worn protection because she railed her with the biggest package there is. May has been compromised to a permanent end. Storm is starring in the new film Queen of the Ring on March 7th. If she is going to be the best, she has to face the best. Women of wrestling, lend me your ears. Put your head up and your tits out. Whether it is Willow, Kris, or Wendi Richter. Let’s go tit for tit, lip to lip, but only one woman stands tall, and her name is TIMELESS!
(I uh, yeah, that was wild lol)
Promo now for Gabe Kidd. You know, the guy who never shuts the fuck up and lost to Kenny Omega at Wrestle Dream in January? The man who doesn’t need AEW, but he apparently is coming to Collision this Saturday. That’s odd!
Kris and Megan will be going at it on the other side of the break.
COMMERCIALS!
Renee is back after the break with Willow Nightingale. She breaks the fourth wall by saying that Renee’s husband attacked her last week, and if on cue, here comes Marina. They tussle, but Marina ends up with the upper hand. The Death Riders (sans PAC) go to the ring now. Do you know who Moxley is? He is the World Champion! This is his ring, this is his camera, this is his title, you’re sitting in his seats. No one comes into his house and issues a challenge. Cope is probably still on his ass, face down in the dirt in Australia. He will pop Cope’s head with his bare hands, and if he shows up at Revolution, he will finish the damn job!
Jay White is out now, with some bad numbers here. Oh, here comes PAC, he is actually here. And apparently, so is Cope (Just Cope). He enters the ring behind Moxley, as White hits a Bladerunner on PAC. SPEAR TO CLAUDIO! SPEAR TO YUTA! Cope (Just Cope) has spike! White has a chair! The Death Riders run like cowards, despite the numbers advantage. Cope (Just Cope) chases after them. He has a mic now. Moxley, this isn’t your arena, these aren’t your seats, these aren’t your people. They’re my people! Moxley is probably halfway back to whatever bridge you live under. You’re a coward. You have no guts, you have no nuts, you have no spine. He is going to take out his “goon squad” one by one until Revolution, where he will kick Jon’s ass!
Again, to the back with Renee, she has “Four Belts” Mone! Phoenix! Say hello to your CEO! She doesn’t want any puppets or surprises! Renee says she is 14-0 and it looks like no one can stop the Mone Train! No, Harley found out the hard way that she is no match for Mone. Apparently, Lexy Nair talked to Momo Watanabe. She has chosen Mone for the TBS Title at Revolution. Take my heart now!
Mone says what the hell was that? She said no surprises. You want to face Mone for the TBS Title? Come to Dynamite and say it to her face!
Kris Statlander is here for what promises to be a fantastic big girls match!
Kris Statlander vs. Megan Bayne
The bell rings and we are underway. Both ladies come face to face in the middle of the ring. They lock up and fight for control. Bayne gets the better of that and takes a cheap shot. Statlander tries to shoulder tackle Bayne, but she stands tall. Bayne tries the same, but Kris stands tall. Bayne kicks Kris in the gut, but Kris responds with a leg trip, a front flip senton, and a standing moonsault for a two count. Statlander mounts Bayne in the corner, but she fights her off. Roundhouse kick by Statlander. She charges in, Bayne gets the leg up, but Kris grabs her and lifts her up. Bayne fights out and hits a HUGE flying clothesline! PIP Break.
Ladies match = no PIP thoughts!
We’re back, as both women are back to their feet and trying to get the upper hand with clotheslines. Statlander wins out and hits a front suplex. An axe kick by Kris leads to a two-count. Bayne hits Kris with a wild forearm and a release German. Kris on the ring apron, Bayne follows. Statlander with a side slam on the apron! BUT BAYNE GETS RIGHT UP! SHE GERMAN’S KRIS BACK INTO THE RING! Megan puts Kris on the top rope. Statlander wins out and drops Megan to the mat. Here is Penelope Ford to shove Kris off the top! F-5 Variant by Bayne, that’s a win!
WINNER: Megan Bayne
TIME: 9:30
THOUGHTS: As expected, these women went out there and delivered a great match. Neither one should have lost here, but at least with Ford getting involved, there is the caveat for Kris losing.
RATING: ***3/4
Ford gets into the ring post-match and attacks Statlander. Thunder Rosa is here now with a chair in hand. Ford fights to get the chair away from her, but Rosa shoves her away. She threatens Bayne with it, but Penelope and Megan leave the ring.
Renee working overtime tonight, she has Max Caster. He is 0-2 in his open challenges, should you reconsider this? No, Renee, this isn’t how the Open Challenge should go. They need to face him eye-to-eye. This will continue on Collison, and he wants whoever answers to look him in the eye, shake his hand, and accept that you can never be better than the best.
Psycho Professor Royalty Ricochet is in the house! Really? This is how we’re going to act? You know what, that’s okay because he would be bitter if he had to live in Phoenix. He has a helicopter to lift him out of here, and like Kevin Durant, he is trying to get out of this boring ass town. You do you, he will do him. Ricky will be speaking to the people at home because they can hear him loud and clear. All of these people, all of this booing doesn’t matter. When you boo a winner, you boo into a void of nothingness. Ricky is a winner, and he proved it when he pinned Swerve to the mat two weeks ago. But he’s been proving it since he stepped foot into AEW. He whooped Darby’s ass, Will’s ass, Komander’s ass. Winners, they always have something to show for it, and Ricky has this robe to show for it. He’s not content wearing the robe, he wants to wear a title belt. He will be the main name on this roster, he came to win, but he also came to win gold. That is where his sight is set in 2025. Ricky needs to correct that; he WILL be a champion because he is too damn good-looking not to be.
WHOSE HOUSE? Apparently, it’s Prince Nana’s house! Ricky is looking around for Swerve. Nana knows what he is thinking, but this isn’t that. He wants to talk to Ricky one-on-one, so Swerve was told to stay home. They have been beefing for months, and he doesn’t know where this is going, but Ricky is wearing something that doesn’t belong to him. Nana has been in the business for three decades, closing deals, making history, and the robe has a lot to do with it. The robe represents pride, integrity, those that he walked with, and those that we lost. Anyone who wears the robe has honor, been bestowed the chance to be great, and Nana didn’t give him that opportunity. If he is that winner, then Ricky should give the robe back to Nana.
Ricky says it’s okay, take the robe. What’s wrong, are you going to cry, Nana? That’s okay, we all have emotions. You’re not getting your robe back, Nana. AH-HA!
(That was…something, I guess. I do like the turn-on-the-heel character by Ricky. Delusional Ricky > plain vanilla babyface Ricky).
Our main event is up next!
COMMERCIALS!
We’re back, as we get to hear the new(er) UK theme play out, as Roddy Strong is out first with Kyle and Adam!
Revolution International “Series”: Orange Cassidy vs. Roderick Strong
Good ole JR, Jim Ross is here for this match! Orange is back to Jane instead of Where is My Mind.
The bell rings, as Orange takes off his sunglasses. Excalibur reminds us that it was Strong who took the International Title from Cassidy. Strong with the go-behind, Cassidy fights out, as he gives the lazy thumbs up and rolls up Strong for a two. Strong misses a clothesline, as Cassidy runs the ropes. He leaves the ring and hugs Kyle on the floor. LOL! Cassidy puts his hand up over his face and acts like he doesn’t see Cole. LMAO! Cassidy back in, but now Strong goes to the floor and hugs Kyle and Adam! Take that, Orange! Cassidy with a suicide dive through the ropes onto Strong! Another hug by Orange for Kyle. Feel the love! Cassidy up top, but Strong drop kicks Cassidy out of the air. Strong with chops, but Cassidy rolls to the floor. He doesn’t hug Kyle this time, in case you were wondering. Strong with stomps, and he hits a slingshot powerslam for a two-count. That was creative. Strong stretches out Cassidy as we go to PIP Break.
-One thing you didn’t know was that Foul Play is crap!
-And with that, we get American Dad!
-A kid negotiating terms for her taking Mucinex is something lol.
-Robitussin gives you a voice so you can talk about casual Friday!
-KEEP IT TWISTED, TWISTA!
-How many sites sell stuff now lol. Wild.
-“Vacation Maximizer”. Well okay, buddy.
-Ask for a hamburger at Wendy’s? I’M IRISH, I WANT THE BAKED POTATO!
-Factor does look good, NGL.
-Cap! Cap! Cap!
-AUSSIE AUSSIE AUSSIE, OI OI OI!
-We have AEW on TNT/TBS and Max, in case you nearly forgot!
We’re back, as Cassidy hits one of his patented DDTs on Strong. This was a slingshot version, BTW. Chops by Strong keep flooring Cassidy, only for him to get right back up. HANDS IN THE POCKETS! THIS IS SERIOUS BUSINESS, YO! Dropkick by Cassidy. Cassidy takes Strong corner to corner. Cassidy up top, crossbody from the top. Strong blocks the DDT, but Slumdog Millionaire is countered, too. Around the World DDT by Cassidy, cover for a two count. Cassidy looking for the Beach Break, but Strong with combination strikes. Cassidy rolls up Strong for a two-count. Beach Break, but Strong kicks out at two again. Cassidy goes to lower the elbow pad, but a pump kick by Strong. One backbreaker! Two backbreakers! Third one over both knees! The cover for two. Strong looking for the Strong Hold, but Cassidy rolls him up for two. Another backbreaker by Strong and he gets the Cloverleaf. Cassidy quickly breaks the hold. Strong grabs Cassidy and pulls him up. Cassidy goes for the lazy kicks and then serious kicks. Cassidy gets countered with a pump kick and the sick kick! Stundog Millionaire by Cassidy! ORANGE PUNCH! CASSIDY MOVES ON!
WINNER: Orange Cassidy
TIME: 13:00
THOUGHTS: Premise of a “series” aside, this was a really good match, as to be expected between two guys with previous chemistry between them. Long time, no see for Orange.
RATING: ***1/2
Tony Schiavone is in the ring now. Next week, it’s Cassidy versus Takeshita for the International Title, and then the winner faces Omega at Revolution. The “music” of the Don Callis Family stops Cassidy. Callis has something very important to say. To Callis, Cassidy is nothing but a red-headed hippie. You’re nothing but a loudmouth punk. Callis sticks Mark Davis and Konosuke Takeshita on Orange. Callis kicks Cassidy in his oranges. Here is Kenny Omega! He gets the upper hand for a bit, but the numbers game is too much. Cassidy is alive, he counters Takeshita, allowing Omega to hit Takeshita with a V-Trigger. One for Davis as well! Omega holds the International Title up and celebrates with it, only to realize that Cassidy is staring at him and the title belt. Suspense!
And with that, we’re done!
