Csonka’s GCW Joey Janela’s Spring Break 2 Review

Csonka’s GCW Joey Janela’s Spring Break 2 Review

– Eli Everfly defeated DJZ, Tony Deppen, Gringo Loco, KTB and Teddy Hart @ 11:12 via pin [***¼]
– Matt Riddle defeated James Ellsworth @ 3:37 via submission [**]
– Carl Pierre Oulette defeated WALTER @ 18:35 via pin [****]
– GCW Title Match: Champion Nick Gage defeated Penta El 0M @ 9:38 via pin [***]
– David Starr defeated Mike Quackenbush @ 11:43 via pin [***¾]
– THE CLUSTERFUCK: The Invisible Man Won @ 40:10 [DUD]
– Joey Janela vs. Great Sasuke @ 26:02 via pin [**]

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– Follow all of my reviews at this link.

– You can check out reviews of Matt Riddle’s Bloodsport here, EVOLVE 102 here, EVOLVE 103 here, and Mercury Rising 2018 here.

– The place is packed, with reportedly 1,500 in attendance.

Eli Everfly vs. DJZ vs. Tony Deppen vs. Gringo Loco vs. KTB vs. Teddy Hart: We start off with brawling and bodies being tossed to the floor. They work into a really fast pace, and Hart hits a suplex on the floor. DJZ back in and runs wild, Hart cuts him off and hits a code red on KTB for 2. He follows with a back stabber on Deppen, and follows with a back breaker. He takes out Everfly, hits a powerbomb and follows with a moonsault to the floor. Deppen follows with a 450 onto the pile. Loco with a dive. KTB fires up and he hits a dive. Everfly hits a RANA to the floor. He then works over KTB, and cuts off Loco. They work up top and he hits a super RANA for 2. They work into a multi-man submission spot, and KTB hits a blockbuster. Hart flies in with a DDT and springboard corkscrew elbow drop. DJZ tosses him, Loco slips off of a double stomp, but rebounds with a cutter. DJZ up top, gets cut off, but then RANAs Loco onto KTB. The DDT follows but Hart makes the save. He tosses DJZ, Everfly hits a RANA, but Deppen hits strikes and a right. He heads up top and gets cut off. Everfly follows him up and hits a DESTROYER off the ropes for the win. Eli Everfly defeated DJZ, Tony Deppen, Gringo Loco, KTB and Teddy Hart @ 11:12 via pin [***¼] This was a wild and crazy opener, and exactly what it should have been as the opener. Everyone worked hard, and while a bit sloppy at times, it was tremendously fun.

Matt Riddle vs. James Ellsworth: Ellsworth attacks before the bell, taking out Riddle’s knee. Riddle quickly fires back with gut wrench suplexes. Riddle follows with chops and running forearm strikes. The XPLODER follows on Ellsworth. The senton follows, and Riddle misses a running knee, as he was aiming for the chin of Ellsworth. Ellsworth dumps him to the floor, but then back in hits the superkick. Another gets 2. He looks for a third, but Riddle cuts him off and the bromission finishes it. Matt Riddle defeated James Ellsworth @ 3:37 via submission [**] This was short, quick, and fun; exactly what it needed to be.

– Virgil arrives. He cuts a promo, and says nothing of note. Ok then.

WALTER vs. Carl Pierre Oulette: Carl is 50 and is in great shape. WALTER gives him a chance to walk before the ass beating begins. Carl refuses. They lock up and we get a clean break. WALTER looks to ground things, but Carl rolls out. They work shoulder tackles, and WALTER gets knocked to the floor. Back in and WALTER hits a shoulder tackle and takes him down. He follows with chops, they trade and it gets a bit sloppy. WALTER hits a slam and sit down splash. More chops by WALTER follows, he talks shit and chokes out Carl in the ropes. More chops follow from both, but WALTER takes him down. He gives no fucks. Carl fires back with kicks and a flatliner. WALTER quickly dumps him to the floor. WALTER follows and Carl fires back with kicks. He gets a table, sets it up and WALTER lays in chops to cut him off. He then suplexes him onto the apron, and lays in more chops. WALTER to the apron, and Carl attacks, but WALTER cuts him off with a kick. More floor brawling follows. WALTER continues to abuse him with chops until he misses and hits the post. Carl attacks the hand; heads up top and the moonsault comes up short, grazing the ref & WALTER. WALTER back on the attack now, moves the table and Carl is dead tired. WALTER powerbombs him through the table. Back in and WALTER hits another powerbomb, but there is no ref. The new ref arrives, counting 2. The old ref is taken away, WALTER continues on with more chops and wants the ref to stop it. He won’t so WALTER continues to kick ass. Carl slowly fires up, drops the straps, and WALTER lays in more chops but Carl fires back and the crowd loves it. WALTER fires back as Carl’s chest is fucking purple. Carl hits a rolling lariat and WALTER spills to the floor. Carl follows with a suicide dive. Back in and Carl follows with another dive. Back in they go, WALTER to the ropes but gets cut off. Carl follows him up and hits a RANA for 2. WALTER fires back and hits a big German. Carl now hits a Finlay roll, and heads up top. The split legged moonsault get 2. Carl back up top, but WALTER cuts him off with chops and follows him up. Carl fires back and knocks him to the mat. Carl follows with a big senton and picks up the win. Carl Pierre Oulette defeated WALTER @ 18:35 via pin [****] This ended up being really great. Oulette is 50, he was dead tired, and almost died on a moonsault, but rebounded and this was an insane hard-hitting match with a molten crowd that just delivered.

– Gage cuts a promo and fires up the crowd.

GCW Champion Nick Gage vs. Penta El 0M: This crowd is great so far. They talk shit and Penta grabs a chair and lays out Gage. More chair shots follow, and then Penta follows with chops. Gage fires back, but gets dumped into the crowd. Penta gets a door, slides it into the ring and gets another. He sets them up in the corners, Gage back in and sends Penta through a door and then does the deal with a falcon arrow for 2. Penta fights back and hits a DVD through a door in the corner. He then uses pieces of the door, attacking Gage, and covering for 2. They brawl to the floor, and Penta works him over with part of the door. Penta lays him on a table, lays door pieces on him and hits an elbow off the barricade, but I AM THE TABLE, no break. Penta now looks for more toys, and gets a chair. Penta makes a door bridge and hits a Penta driver onto it and that gets 2. Penta makes another door bridge, they work up top, but Gage slips out and hits a powerbomb through the door and a chokebreaker for the win. Champion Nick Gage defeated Penta El 0M @ 9:38 via pin [***] This was a good hardcore style match with a great crowd. They worked well together and brought a great sense of intensity to the match.

– Gage cuts a post match promo, promising to fuck people up. The sound system still sucks, and it’s impossible to hear what he’s saying.

Mike Quackenbush vs. Davis Starr: They immediately work into a series of slick counters, and then lock up. Starr trips up Quackenbush, hits a Thesz press, and gets 2. The small package gets 2. They lock up, Quackenbush hits a boot and then hits a lucha arm drag and Starr makes the ropes to avoid the submission attempt. The crowd appreciates the grappling here, Quackenbush hits an atomic drop and then works for an arm bar, but Starr makes the ropes and powders. Back in and Quackenbush locks on an abdominal stretch. WALTER is on commentary, talking about always beating Starr. Starr escapes and hip tosses Quackenbush to the buckles and hits a DVD to the buckles. The shining wizard follows for 2. Starr then clotheslines Quackenbush to the floor and follows with a dive. Starr breaks the count, Quackenbush slowly works to his feet, and Starr rolls him back in. Quackenbush cuts him off and hits a RANA off the ropes. The senton follows by Quackenbush for 2. The Quackendriver gets 2. Starr cuts off the RANA< hits a powerbomb, and hits a northern lights for 2. The running knee follows for 2 again. WALTER says Starr is acting like a dick. Starr gets dumped to the floor, they work to the apron and Quackenbush hits the tornado DT and suicide dive. Starr cuts him off with an apron DDT. Quackenbush counters into a double arm submission. But Starr escapes, and kills him with a lariat for the win. David Starr defeated Mike Quackenbush @ 11:43 via pin [***¾] Starr smartly took the heel role here, being an absolute asshole, and allowing Quack to play the resilient babyface. Quack is still an absolutely excellent performer, and with his style, can work matches like this for a long time. This was a very, very good match, and a beautiful mix of technique and brutality. WALTER was a treasure on commentary.

– Star puts over Quack big time post match.

The Clusterfuck Match: This is royal ruble rules, with eliminations being by pin, submission, over the top, or death. Jimmy Lloyd (last year’s winner), and Session Moth Martina to begin. Martina grinds on Lloyd and #3 is Orange Cassidy. As always he takes his time. #4 is Wheeler Yuta. Martina hits a broncobuster on Lloyd, Yuta hits one as well and Martina hits another. #5 is Curt Stallion, he and Yuta works back and forth. #6 is some due they don’t name (it’s Facade), he hits a big dive to the floor. He then eliminates Stallion. #7 is Swoggle. The commentators are completely wasted. He starts hitting Germans on everyone. #8 is Grado. Swoggle fails to German him and Grado attacks with his belly. #9 is Kikaturo. He does the ropewalk until Grado crotches him. #10 is the invisible man. He runs wild on everyone, and tosses Kikaturo. He then submits Swoggle. #11 is Joe Gacy. He runs wild for a bit. #12 is Earl Cooter. #13 is Chris Dickinson smoking a cigarette. Façade takes him out, but Dickinson fires back and eliminates him. He tosses Lloyd and then powerbombs Yuta to the floor for the elimination. Cassidy never entered, and the invisible man is still in I believe. Dickinson pins Grado. #14 is Dan Severn. They grapple right away, and #15 is Alabama Doink. He attacks Severn, and Severn tosses him. Dickinson tosses Severn. #16 is Ricky Shane Page. Dickinson attacks, and #17 is Marcus Crane, who immediately blows a spot so Dickinson powerbombs him. #18 is two masked guys? They work over Dickinson, and double pin him. #19 is Rory Gulak. Commentary is SO wasted. #20 is an unidentified dude who celebrates in the crowd. Rory took out the masked guys who were never named. Ok, it’s Nate Webb. Everyone stands around doing nothing. He finally gets in the ring. He lays out Gulak and pins him. #21 is Ethan Page. Webb runs wild, but misses a cannonball. #22 is MJF. The masked guys are back, apparently not eliminated. Page & MJF toss them. RSP is back, also not eliminated, but MJF rolls him up and eliminates him. Martina is back, pulling a condom from her pants and uses it as a mandible claw on Page. Page rolls her up and she’s gone. Cassidy is finally in. He fires up as only he can; he mists MJF & Page and hits a double chokeslam. Cassidy up top and falls to the mat and is pinned. The invisible man fires up, working over Page and MJF. Fucking Lloyd is still here and piledrives the invisible man. The commissioner disqualifies Lloyd for the piledriver. Page attacks Webb, and he and MJF cover him for 2. Page & MJF attack ref Bryce Remsberg, and he fires up and runs wild. MJF low blows him and tosses him to the floor. And now Uncle Fester Mikey Whipwreck arrives. He runs wild on Page & MJF for a bit, but they cut him off. MJF up top and Whipwreck tosses Page into him. Webb then pins Page. MJF cuts off the whippersnapper, and hits a splash for the elimination. MJF then eliminates Webb. But the invisible man rolls up MJF and wins. The Invisible Man Won @ 40:10 [DUD] Well, it was a clusterfuck and the joke went on too long. There were certainly a few fun moments, but this did not need to go anywhere near 40-minutes. Cut it in half and it would have been a lot of fun, less is more.

Joey Janela vs. Great Sasuke: They work some back and forth into a stand off. Sasuke grounds things, but Janela escapes. He lays the boots to Sasuke, but Sasuke keeps frustrating Janela, he then hypnotizes Janela, and makes Janela slam himself head first to the mat. They work to the floor; Sasuke gets chairs, and then a ladder. He works over Janela with a cookie sheet, but Janela firs back with chops. Janela lays Sasuke on a table, but Sasuke fights back and tosses Janela off the ropes… BUT I AM THE TABLE! Back in and Sasuke lays Janela on a ladder, and then misses a senton, and lands with his head trapped in the ladder. Janela attacks with an inflatable alligator covering for 2. Janela gets chairs and slides them in. He then sets them up with bad intentions. Sasuke cuts off Janela, and powerbombs him onto the chairs, covering for 2. Sasuke now gets pieces of the broken doors from earlier, and then a full door. Sasuke sets up doors in the corners, and then hits Janela with one. Janela sends Sasuke into a door, and then Sasuke sends Janela through a door. Sasuke now works an arm bar, but Janela makes the ropes, They brawl to the apron, and trade strikes. Janela hits an apron DVD and yells “This is for dirt bike kid & Fuck Jim Cornette!” Janela sets Sasuke in a chair, heads up top and Sasuke moves as Janela sentons to the floor, DESTROYING the chair. Sasuke sets up a table, lays Sasuke on the table, and sentons Janela through the table. Penelope Ford gets involved, distracting Sasuke. She dances for Sasuke, and Sasuke dances with her. Janela then attacks, and hits a rolling elbow. He works over Sasuke, and locks in the figure four. Sasuke fights and makes the ropes. Janela attacks with chair shots; he heads up top and misses the moonsault. To the floor they go, Sasuke gets a table, and sets it up, but one of the legs is broken. He lays Janela on the table and gets trashcan, and puts it on and he climbs up top and takes forever as he has many issues and then throws the can onto Janela and then sentons onto the table as Janela moved, but, I AM THE TABLE AGAIN! Fucking imported Japanese tables. Janela rolls Sasuke back in and covers for 2. They trade strikes; Janela hits a superkick and gets a ladder. He Michinoku drivers Sasuke onto it, but only gets 2. Janela hits a chair assisted top rope double stomp onto Sasuke for the win. Joey Janela vs. Great Sasuke @ 26:02 via pin [**] These two guys killed themselves, and I can appreciate that. Unfortunately they had a plan for a really good 15-minute match and then went nearly twice as long. There were good and interesting spots and a great sense of danger at times, but they just kept going and the exhausted crowd lost interest the longer they went. It wasn’t bad, but I’d only call it ok.

– End scene.

– Thanks for reading.

“Byyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyye Felicia!”

6.0

The final score: review Average

The 411

I won’t lie, I wasn’t a big fan of last year’s Joey Janela's Spring Break show. I thought about not covering the show this year, but a strong promotional campaign and interesting matches pulled me in. I thought that this year’s event was an improvement and that Joey Janela should be complimented on providing a different show that drew a huge crowd. The show started off with a strong and good run, but hit a wall with the Clusterfuck that completely overstayed it’s welcome, and a main event that did the same. If you edit and condense both matches, the show would have been much better. Make sure to catch Quack vs. Starr & CPO vs. WALTER if cherry picking.