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Csonka’s TNA Impact Review 7.29.15

July 29, 2015 | Posted by Larry Csonka
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Csonka’s TNA Impact Review 7.29.15  

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TNA Impact Review 7.29.15

– Eric Young defeated Chris Melendez @ 3:10 via pin [SQUASH]
Knockouts Title Match: Champion Brooke defeated Marti Belle @ 4:12 via pin [*]
– Magnus and Mickie James defeated Serena and James Storm @ 11:20 via pin [**]

* We get highlights from last week.

Austin Aries Talks: Aries doesn’t care about what people say about him, because no one is better than him right now. He’s upset that he wasn’t included in the #1 contender’s match, and Bully Ray didn’t make a god impression on him. This of course brought out Ray, who said that the fans are the ones that matter, and he asks if he is doing a good job. He then puts over Aries, because Aries beat him in this ring. Ray then says he will get a shot, but not now because Aries already lost to Angle. He then wants a tag title rematch, but Ray reminds him that he just lost in a best of five series. Ray then offers him a shot at the X-Division title, which Aries doesn’t seem to appreciate. He says that the title needs him more than he needs the title, because it’s made for guys like Rockstar Spud, who will never main event. This brought out Spud. Spud’s feeling were hurt, and he put over Aries for all he has done. Aries heeled it up well, and reminded Spud that he shouldn’t have tried to cash in because he now has nothing. They set up a match, where Spud claimed that he thinks he could win. Ray put over Spud, and this led to them setting the stipulation that if Aries wins, he gets the Rockstar name, if he loses, he’ll leave TNA. Aries was really good, as always, but as a whole this was a completely average opening talking segment.

* Jeff and Karen Jarrett arrive earlier today.

* Angle met with Melendez, and they discussed their issues with Eric Young. Angle thanked Melendez for his help, which led to Melendez saying that he needed to beat Young to move on in the business. Angle told him to go after Young.

* Melendez came to the ring with Angle and called out Eric Young. He knows Young has gotten the better of him, but he will not quit and will not accept losing. Young arrived and said that Melendez doesn’t want him coming into the ring, and told him to quit while he’s still breathing. Melendez said he’d beat his ass and here we go.

Chris Melendez w/Kurt Angle vs. Eric Young: Young dominated the match, which had next to no heat, and finished off Melendez with the piledriver. Young is really good, but this feud feels dead in the water; Young could and should be used much better. There is no heat for the feud, and with all due respect to Chris Melendez, he is not a good professional wrestler. This felt like the same match that they already did, ad I didn’t like it any better this time around.

* Borash tried to get a word with Matt Hardy about what stipulation he will pick for his match with EC3. He kept saying “we,” teasing Jeff return.

*Highlights of Brooke winning the Knockouts Title.

Knockouts Title Match: Champion Brooke vs. Marti Belle w/Taryn and Jade: Brooke brawls with Marti and Jade on the floor before the match starts. Brooke took them out and tried to attack Taryn, but Marti attacked and then the match started. This was a rough match at times, Marti did the heel 101 tactics, but it lacked a sense of flow. Brooke finally took control, but then Taryn and Jade got involved. Gail Kim’s music played, nothing happened, the lights came back on and Brooke hit the “butter face maker” for the win. This wasn’t good, they didn’t work smoothly together at all, Marti takes bumps too early at times, and then they did the usual bullshit for the finish. Moving on.

* We get a video for Tigre Uno. These are a great idea to focus on him as a performer and to show his personality. Just keep the Trump shit out of it (like they did this week) and we’re all good.

* Uno then gave a live promo, and Christy Hemme discussed that fact that Donald Trump is NOT here, even though Uno challenged him last week to show up. Uno then said he’s not afraid of Trump or people like him. Oh come on, this shit is stupid. Can we just focus on the fact that he’s champion and continue with the great video package stuff that can actually make us care about him?

* EC3 doesn’t give a shit about Matt Hardy’s stipulation choice.

* Aries faces Spud next week with the Rockstar name and Aires’ career on the line.

* Jeff Jarrett talks with Billy Corgan.

EC3 Talks: EC3 will be defending his title next week at No Surrender against Matt Hardy. He’s not pleased that Bully Ray tricked him, because now Hardy gets to pick his own stipulation. EC3 would be concerned if the match was against Jeff, but he broke his leg; the man that has fallen off of everything in wrestling but got hurt on his moped. After claiming that Matt wasn’t world champion material, Jeff Hardy returned; EC3 was not impressed. Jeff claimed watching EC3 on TV made him sick and that his overconfidence will be the end of him. Jeff claimed that he was healing up, and is training, and when he returns he will drop titanium shins on EC3’s face. Jeff then promised that Matt would end EC3’s reign, and here comes Matt. Matt claims that the naysayers have always said they couldn’t make it, but they always succeed. Matt then retrieved toys from under the ring (tables, ladders and chairs) and Matt made his title shot a Full Metal Mayhem. Also, Bully Ray has banned everyone from ringside for the match. Overall good mic work from all involved, it felt a bit long, but the set up for next week was good.

* Magnus and Mickie James cut a pre-match promo. Magnus says that they should be celebrating because he and Mickie are teaming. But it’s not, because this a fight with a man who tried to ruin his family. Mickie thanks Storm for having her agree to one last match. As far as Serena goes, she can’t believe that she was brainwashed. So tonight, she will have to beat her ass.

Magnus and Mickie James vs. Serena and James Storm: So this started well enough as Magnus rushed Storm and started to brawl. And then, following all of the talk from both sides, we settled into a regular wrestling match by the 1:30 mark. There is no stipulation, but the fact that they hyped this as Magnus and Mickie getting their revenge and Storm wanting to end them. I do not think a regular grappling bout is appropriate here. They also had the big unsanctioned match, so to go back to this seems completely ass backwards. They worked through the commercial, with Storm dominating things. Strom dominated for about seven-minutes, until they did a double down spot. The ladies finally tagged in after eight-minutes, Mickie ran wild and then got the Thesz press off the top for a near fall. Strom tried to attack Mickie, she fought back and Serena hit a Malenko style gut buster. Serena called for Khoya, the ladies brawled and then Khoya accidentally hit Storm. Magnus planted Storm with the powerbomb, and Mickie scored with a really sloppy primal scream DDT for the win. Mickie then got the DDT on Storm to close the segment. They worked the wrong match here to close out this feud, it made completely no sense, and who ever wrote the segment and laid out the match should be completely ashamed of themselves. It was ok for a basic TV match, but I feel that they failed writing a final conclusion to the feud so that they could segue into the Revolution dissolution. It makes sense because they are staying, but this segment just didn’t do it for me at all. It felt too long, it was the wrong match and it wasn’t really good.

* Bram will face Anderson next week in a NO DQ match, Eli Drake will face Drew Galloway, Kim faces Dollhouse, Spud vs. Aries and EC3 vs. Hardy for the title.

* We get a long Jeff Jarrett video package.

Jeff Jarrett Joins the TNA Hall of Fame: Tenay introduced Dixie, she told a brief version of the history between herself and Jarrett and then put him over for starting the company. I’m not judging the speech, this was Jeff’s time as he did all of his thank yous, it was emotional and it felt genuine.

* End scene.

* Thanks for reading.

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“I’m out…”

The final score: review Not So Good
The 411
: I will give then credit, they set up a nice card for next week, and it was certainly time that Jarrett go this place in the TNA hall of fame. With that being said, this wasn’t a good show and it felt like a complete chore to get through. The Hall of Fame segment was nice (if long) and I do appreciate the fact that they set up next week’s show, but tonight’s wrestling product was not good at all and the show felt very thrown together. I guess it didn’t really feel edited together al that well, it felt as if they took a bunch of puzzle pieces to me that didn’t really fit but that they made them fit. The best thing was the set up and announcing matches for next week, but the rest pulled it down too much to make it a good show.

Hopefully with next week set with a good lineup, they let the wrestling speak for itself and don’t get in the way of the performers, because next week’s show could get them out of the slump that I feel the are in.