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Csonka’s WWE Royal Rumble 2015 Review

January 26, 2015 | Posted by Larry Csonka
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Csonka’s WWE Royal Rumble 2015 Review  

Introduction
As a reminder, this will not be another traditional recap, but instead it will be a mash up of the Rs, Instant Analysis and my usual Twitter ramblings I would do during the shows; completely uncensored and as the ideas flow unfiltered to the old keyboard. Remember, this is a review; and I am here to review the show. As always, I encourage discussion and even disagreement, just do so in a respectful manner. I will be doing the review for Raw and most PPVs and iPPVs going forward.

WWE Royal Rumble 2015

 photo WWE-Royal-Rumble-Logo_zpskcxvowkg.png


OFFICIAL RESULTS
~ The Ascension defeated The New Age Outlaws @ 5:42 via pin []
~ Tag Team Title Match: Champions The Usos defeated Miz and Sandow @ 9:20 via pin [**½]
~ The Bellas defeated Paige and Natalya @ 8:20 via pin []
~ World Title Match: Champion Brock Lesnar defeated Seth Rollins and John Cena @ 23:10 via [****½]
~ Roman Reigns won the Royal Rumble @ 59:10 [*]


The New Age Outlaws vs. The Ascension: The Outlaws did some mic work pre-match, which pleased the live crowd. Not gonna lie, I always loved Road Dogg’s intro stuff, and if you’re going to use these guys, you have to have them do it. I was really hoping that after the mic work that The Ascension would hit the ring and take out the Outlaws, quick right and in squash like fashion. That did not happen. What’s unfortunate is that the Outlaws are likely the better team to have on the full time roster right now, and the crowd just loathed the Ascension. I feel that WWE put a lot of time into their debut, and don’t think that this match did anything to help them all that much. That’s the sad part, they put the time into it, and I feel as if they are already wavering on them. I personally don’t think they are great, but start and stop pushes don’t do anyone favors. I just have a bad feeling about their main roster future. So hey, they beat the Outlaws, they should bring in the Rock and Roll Express and any other tag teams with any name value and have them beat them for a while. At least the delusional pretenders to the throne gimmick would be fun. The pre-match was actually more entertaining than the actual match in many ways.

Tag Team Title Match: Champions The Usos vs. Miz and Sandow: After what seemed like a never-ending series of various tag and singles matches, we come to the latest tag team title match between the two teams. As many expected, the lively Philly crowd loved Sandow and were hot when he ran wild late in the match. Scary part where Miz missed catching an Uso on a dive, he seriously does not like catching guys on dives. The Usos retained in a fine little match, not nearly as good as many of the Usos matches, but the crowd was fun. The Usos need to move onto new challengers and now.

The Bellas vs. Paige and Natalya: They have been building the feud on TV with extremely short matches, and due to that, no one has really cared about it. Well that’s WWE booking women’s wrestling for you. The crowd, which was into the show thus far, started to entertain themselves with the OLE chant as Brie and Natalya tried something, it ended up ugly. They had a long heat segment on Natalya, and just as she was going to get the hot tag, Brie pulled Paige to the floor. Nikki hit the forearm and that was that. I will say that I liked that they got time and that they deviated from the basic tag formula, that really needs to be done more often. Some may say it lacked drama, but I have no problem with the champion and her partner taking this in an extended squash. With that being said, the match just felt long in a bad way. The disinterested crowd didn’t help, and the other thing was that while they deviated from the basic formula (again appreciated), we just saw a match that saw the one partner not get to tag in or really get involved. Overall this was about on par with the opener, it wasn’t actively bad, but it was just there.

* MINI RUMBLE PROMOS!

World Title Match: Champion Brock Lesnar vs. John Cena vs. Seth Rollins: the Philly crowd having fun pre-match, singing “John Cena Sucks” to Cena’s theme music. Brock dished out several German suplexes early, including one of both members of J&J at the same time. Watching Lesnar toss grown ass men around while Heyman smiles like an evil genius at ringside will never get old. The story of the match was that Brock Lesnar is a grown ass man, and was simply destroying people at every turn. Toss suplexes, catches Rollins on a high cross into an F5, taking three consecutive AA’s from Cena and getting up; great intensity and physicality. Cena and Rollins unintentionally double teaming Lesnar at times to survive was also a nice touch. Cena even speared Lesnar through the barricade and slammed him to the steps, but the monster was still able to get to his feet. Cena picked up the steps and skulled Lesnar, who then landed on the Spanish Announce Table, leading to Rollins delivering the big elbow drop from the ring. Cena and Rollins then had a tremendous back and forth as Lesnar received medical attention. Cena and Rollins work very well together and I always find their encounters entertaining. Cena finally got the advantage, which led to J&J getting involved. As they brought out a stretcher for Lesnar, Cena ate the triple powerbomb. Cena fought off J&J with a double AA, avoided the briefcase shot and hit Rollins with the AA, but Rollins kicked out. Rollins then hit a Phoenix splash, but Lesnar rose from the dead to rain on his parade and started to throw Germans. Rollins then waffled him two times with the briefcase, but then Lesnar fought back with the F5 and scored the win. Brock Lesnar is a GROWN ASS MAN. Tremendous work from all three men, Cena always seems to deliver in big matches, Rollins stepped up big in his really big PPV match as a solo and Lesnar continues to be the beast. I love Brock Lesnar matches, because they are completely different than anything WWE produces. The WWE product feels so homogenized and or sterile at times, but these matches feel different and special. This is exactly what this show needed, loved it.

THE ROYAL RUMBLE: Miz and Truth started. #3 was the first surprise of the evening, Bubba Ray Dudley. The Philly crowd loved this. Bubba then did Dudley Boy spots with Truth, and then tossed Miz and Truth. It’s odd as hell typing “Bubba Ray” and “Dudley” after all these years. Bubba’s run ended after a brawl with Harper and Wyatt, and getting tossed by Wyatt. Erick Rowan beat up Curtis Axel and stole his spot, brawled with his former teammates, and then Wyatt tossed them both and POINTED TO THE WRESTLEMANIA SIGN! The Boogeyman was then brought back for a surprise appearance. Boogeyman and Wyatt did weird shit, and then Boogeyman got tossed. Wyatt then tossed Sin Cara to add to his strong run, and then decided to cut a promo about this being his year. Poor Zack Ryder then made his return, hit a few moves and got tossed.

Shit finally got real as Daniel Bryan came out at #10. After the Dudley surprise the crowd seemed a bit out of things, so the Bryan entrance came at the right time. They got the crowd back into it, and these guys have history so it works on that front as well. That positive energy was killed when Fandango came out and actually hit moves on Bryan. Tyson Kidd and his CAT TRUNKS came out, and he had some fun back and forth with Bryan. Stardust was #13, and Bryan eliminated Kidd. Bryan and Wyatt brawled to the floor, and then DDP was #14. Diamond cutters for Stardust, Fandango and Wyatt, leading to Rusev coming out at #15. Rusev then tossed DDP and Fandango right away, had a stand off with Wyatt but that was ended by Bryan and a missile dropkick. After some brawling, Wyatt then eliminated Bryan; giving 6 or 7 eliminations at the moment. That was a shit elimination, not the fact that he got eliminated but the fact that he got eliminated like a goof. The question is, will the crowd turn on the match? Goldust was #16, Stardust tried to toss him and then they brawled. Well, the crowd is chanting for Bryan now, they are turning on the match. Kofi was out at #17, what wacky thing will he do this year? Right now he’s accomplishing wrestling while a crowd shits on him. Rose was #18, and we’re doing the spot where we have guys in the ring and not really doing much of anything. Rusev tossed Kofi but the Rosebuds caught him and crowd surfed him around the ring and put him back on the apron, they then left as Rose got tossed onto his ass. Roman Reigns was #19, the crowd was not pleased. Goldust and Stardust got tossed, leaving the three hosses to battle.

#20 was Big E, joining the hoss brawl. Some bland action here until Sandow came in at #21. Miz came out to take his spot, Sandow ended up in the match and hit a few moves before being tossed. Sometimes I feel that this company can be completely tone-deaf. He and Miz argued, and that was that. Swagger was #22. The crowd was happy for a few seconds, but went back to hating the match. The Big Guy was #23, ran wild on the other hosses for a while but cut off as the crowd entertained themselves with random chants until Kane came out at #24. Nothing happened as the action really slowed to a crawl. Ambrose was #25, and the crowd came alive again for a while as he ran wild. #26 was Titus O’Neil, who was tossed almost instantly, Warlord style quick, not Santino quick. Wade Barrett and his cape were #27. He kissed the IC Title before rushing the ring, not sure I’d kiss that cursed belt, but to each his own. #28 was Cesaro. Surprising lack of reaction from this crowd, who loves guys like Cesaro; they seem to not care at all anymore. We have bodies just piling up here, Rusev then eliminated Big E to clear out someone. #29 is Big Show. Kane and Show worked together as they tossed Ryback and Swagger quickly.

#30 was Dolph Ziggler, and the crowd came alive for him. Ziggler dished out a superkick buffet and eliminated Barrett. The crowd is behind Ziggler, who then eliminated Cesaro. He then got knocked out by Show and was tossed by Show and Kane. Good work, no need to have him get any run at all. Show and Kane then tossed Wyatt, leaving them with Ambrose and Reigns. Bray’s elimination was extremely lame like Bryan’s, especially after he had such a strong run. Show and Kane then dumped Ambrose to jeers. Wait a minute, where is Rusev? Is he taking a powder, because I don’t recall him being eliminated. Show and Kane argued and brawled as the crowd chanted “bullshit” and “we want refunds”. Reigns then eliminated Show and Kane at the same time, but they returned to attack him. They double team chokeslammed him, and then The Rock appeared. He cleaned house on the big men and Rusev then returned. Reigns speared him, pointed to the WrestleMania sign and tossed Rusev. The match wasn’t good. The booking was disjointed, guys that should have been treated like stars got eliminated like goofs, the eliminations were poorly constructed as they really killed the crowd and Rock coming to make the save and “endorse” Reigns felt like putting icing on a pile of shit.

* End scene.

* Thanks for reading.

4.0
The final score: review Poor
The 411
The undercard was one of the most flat and overall worthless I have seen on a PPV in some time. The crowd had their favorites to cheer for, but there was no real juice or excitement from any of the first three matches. I really wish the pre-show match could have made the main card; I had more fun with that match than any of the three that aired on the main card so far. The first hour was essentially all filler.

The World Title match was a great piece of business, I loved it. It came at the right time as the show really needed it. All three men worked their asses off, they delivered a very different match than the usual WWE style match and they are in the clubhouse with the lead in the WWE Match of the Year. It’s the only redeeming thing on the show and is the only reason the show didn’t get a lower overall rating.

Unfortunately the Rumble match was a bust in my eyes. The good Rumble matches have a great flow, they have good storytelling and dramatic eliminations. I felt that some of the eliminations were poorly timed and poorly executed. It has nothing to do with Bryan winning, but they had to know how the crowd would react. Let him get some run, have some dramatic saves and tell the story that he’s trying to get back the title he never lost and THEN eliminate him. The Wyatt elimination was also poorly handled. This felt like Vince McMahon saying “Why, fuck you that’s why” in terms of his booking. I get that Reigns is his guy, but nothing about the push feels organic, there is no ground well of support for him. They did this last year with Batista, and are likely in the same position this year. It just feels forced. I feel like Reigns was more poised and supported last year for a big win than he is a year later. I just get the feeling that WWE, specifically Vince McMahon (and good old Kevin Dunn), doesn’t know how to read their audience.

Unfortunately, like last year’s Royal Rumble event, this was a one-match show. That one match was excellent, but with the first hour being a completely throwaway hour and the Rumble (another hour) not coming off well in any definition of the word, the overall event just did not deliver. The road to WreestleMania is off to a rough start.

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