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DADDY’S HOME!!!

It’s almost time for….BINGO!!!!

This will be the FIRST TIME we do it during AEW, so it should be HYPED! E mail me at [email protected] with the subject line: “I WANNA PLAY BINGO” and wait for your card (they will be sent out tomorrow morning/afternoon).

Let’s gooooo!!!

The cut off is tomorrow at 11 AM, so send me an e mail if you haven’t already!

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OH YEAH, THIS IS A WRESTLING SITE, ISN’T IT?

It’s Monday…you know what that means.

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A recap of last week leads us to Big E and Owens sitting backstage together. Owens says he’s been trying to prove for years that he’s not that guy who turns on his partners anymore. Big E is rubbing cocoa butter on his body, though, so why would he care? Owens continues to try and explain himself, and E hops up off the box, saying he doesn’t care.

Owens is left to tell himself and all listening that he does, in fact, care.

Seth Rollins is here in…bro, I can’t even describe it. Think blue raincoat/flasher jacket.

Rollins reminds us who he is before talking about Survivor Series and how he will lead his team to victory. The crowd chants YOU LOOK STUPID and Seth tells them that they know nothing about fashion. He wants to get to the bottom of something tonight, though: Who is Kevin Owens?

Is he the prized fighter, the person to put it all on the line for the WWE Universe? Or is he a skake. A liar. A spineless coward. He’s known Owens for a long time, and there has always been one thing you can count on, and its that he will stab you in the back any chance he gets. Ask Sami Zayn. Ask Kofi Kingston and New Day. Owens is a paramecium.

Here comes Owens to chase Seth out, then back into the ring. Right hand to Seth in the face. He grabs Seth on the outside and hits another right, sets up for a powerbomb on the apron, but Seth grabs the ropes and pulls himself in the ring, only to high tail it out and up the ramp.

Riddle takes forever to say that he’s going to get payback on Omos.

Omos did not attack them, says Orton, but Riddle had to play hero, and got mauled. So let’s not do that again. Orton doesn’t care about The Street Profits. Riddle is offended. He says they are right behind Orton.

Orton turns and The Profits don’t look too happy. Riddle says he wants the smoke. Randy speaks for himself, saying he meant eery word. He doesn’t care what they do in the ring, but if they have a vendetta with Omos, you’re on your own.

I’ve seen this now so do you:

Match 1: The Street Profits, Randy Orton, and Matt Riddle vs AJ Styles, Omos, Robert Roode and Ziggler
Ford and Roode start it off and Ford does some lippy shit that looks good. He tags in Dawkins who sends Ford atop Roode then covers for 1..2.NO!!! Knee from Roode. An elbow to the back of the head. Tag to Ziggler is in. So is Orton. He stomps the chest, turns Ziggler and stomps the chest again. A third. He stomps the ankle, the other ankle, tag to Riddle. Scrape of the head. He flips Riddle into a flip and Riddle covers for 1..2..NO!!! Whip from AJ to Riddle after they both enter. AJ throat thrusts, goes for Styles Clash, Riddle kicks out of it, another kick, surprise triangle! AJ stands, lifts, and Riddle takes him over the top! Both men on the outside!

We are BACK and Roode and Riddle are stirring in the corner. Riddle high kicks Roode in the corner. Ziggler comes in to distract, but to no avail. Roode hits a suplex and tags in Ziggler. Ziggler drags Riddle to his corner and tags in AJ. Knee to the face. AJ corners Riddle, yells at Ziggler, and tags him in. Ziggler tags in Roode as AJ yells at him too. Roode with. Neckbreaker. Cover 1..2..N!O!! Roode with a boot to the neck. Riddle backflips off of Ziggler, punches AJ off the apron, enziguri to Ziggler, Riddle gets the tag. In comes Orton. Clothelsine to Ziggler, again, powerslam and in comes Roode to get one of his own. AJ grabs Ziggler on the apron, pulls him up and drags him through. Orton locks the head, DDT to Ziggler. Orton calls for the end. He waits. Ziggler stands. IN comes Roode to turn Orton, he gets kicked and sent into Omos, sending him off the apron. Clothelsine sends Roode outside. AJ flies for the forearm, Orton ducks, kicks AJ, and sends AJ over the top rope! Omos catches AJ! He drops him nicely and hops to the apron.

Back and Omos is sweating like crazy. He has Ford in his clutches as he tags in Roode. Roode corners Ford, hitting a chop across the chest. Tag to Ziggler, and he’s got Ford needing some help. He locks the head, backs into the corner, Ziggler tags himself in, He kicks the side as AJ holds Ford. Ford crawls towards his corner, and Ziggler back elbows Orton for no reason. He locks the head of Ford, Orton enters the ring, ref holds him back, neckbreaker to Ford. Cover for 1…2..NO!!! Ford lifts Ziggler, Ziggler with a sunset flip and a pin for 1..2..NO!!! Ford hops up high and hits an Enziguri. Both men down. Tag to Roode. Tag to Dawkins. He comes in, punhes AJ of the corner, hit a clothesline to Roode, hops over Roode, hits a spinning back elbow, grabs Ziggler, T-Bone Suplex, one for Roode!! Dawkins rushes the corner, a spinning right hand, grabs the entering AJ, double underhooks and spins with a neckbreaker. Tag to Omos, and he enters slowly to look down on Dawkins. Dawkins with a right, Omos grbs him and hits a chokelsam. Ford flies right into the clutches! Omos sends him t othe outside. Tag from Riddle. Orton is pissed. Riddile runs in with a knee, another, he gets grabbed by the head, and Omos hits a Tree Slam! Orton is visibly upset. Orton finally enters, but ROode and Ziggler grab his boot and send him into the steps on the outside. Omos is about to tag in AJ, but Ziggler takes the tag away. Roode shoves AJ on the outside, upset with him.

Omos grabs Roode by the neck from behind. He sends Roode into the barricade. Ziggler slides into the ring, covers, and gets a 1..2…3!!!

Winners: Randy Orton, Matt Riddle, and The Street Profits
Although one could readily expect for this match to be a banger, and the story is relatively easy to tell, it still suffers from what a bulk of RAW suffers from – simply that we FEEL like we’ve seen this a thousand times before (and honestly, we kind of have), thereby eliminating the urgency to watch and enjoy. This, coupled with some tropes that are really just tiresome, means the match must lean on the quality, and with two commercial breaks and them doing the bare minimum (which, to be fair, is pretty solid for all eight guys), means there’s nothing here.
Total Rating: ***
Match Time: 21:57

After the match, Orton enters and hits Ziggler with an RKO.

Rey and his son are talking in the back. Owens rushes in to talk to Rey, telling him that he respects Rey’s opinion. He needs to know that Rey believes him.

Rey says he’s kind of pre-occupied. He says he believes Owens, but hesitantly, and his music hits.

Coming Soon Veer Mahaan Sal Mubarak

Rey is in the ring with Dom, saying that Team RAW is a team full of champions, everyone except Dom. So for now, he’s still on Team RAW, but only if he wins against his opponent right now.

His opponent is….

Bobby Lashley.

I should note that I’m not entirely sure why Pearce cares who is on either Team RAW or SD considering he runs both, right?

Match 2: Dominik Mysterio vs Bobby Lashley
Lashley destroys Dom as Adam Pearce watches TV backstage. Lashley tosses Dom into the ring after sending him into the post and finally locks in The Hurt Lock.Dom looks to tap, but Lashley stops ihm. He sends Dom to the outside. Ref starts the count, gets to 5, and Lashley leaves the ring. He gets Dom on his shoulders, Rey pulls him off, so Lashley gives him a big boot. Lashley grabs Dom anyay and sends him into the post yet again. Lashley sends Dom into the ring. He waits in the corner.

SPEAR to Dom. Full Nelson, and Dom finally taps.

Winner: Bobby Lashley
Meh
Total Rating: NR
Match Time: Longer than it needed to be

Rollins rolls up on Alpha Academy, saying he knows Gable has a match coming up, but he’s gotta ask about the whole Owens situation. Gable drops his clipboard, says Seth has come to the right guy. Gable brings up his degree. He can categorically confirm that Owens is an enormous liar, just like Aaron Rodgers. As for Big E, he doesn’t have what it takes, but he will learn.

Match 3: Big E vs Chad Gable
Big E works the wrist, Gable flips out of it, gets whipped, hops over Big E, hits the ropes, ducks under a clothesline, runs over Big E leap frogs and hits a back elbow. Cover for 1….NO!!! Big E with the big splash on the apron. Big E sits Gable on the top rope. Gable back elbows Big E down then rolls over the back of E. He eats an elbow, Big E kicks, Gable swings his leg and dragon screws the other leg. Gable drops some knees onto the inside knee. He locks the leg and pulls on the ankle. Chop block from Gable to the back of the knee. Another. Gable hits the orpes, Big E sends him to the outside. Gable rolls in, Big E locks up for a belly to belly, but Gable reverses! Nice. Gable to the top rope. Moonsault to Big E! Cover or 1..2…NO!!! Big E lifts Gable, drops him, throat thrust from Gable, waist lock, roll up INTO A DEADLIFT GERMAN!!!! 1…2…NO!!!! Gable sits Big E up on his shoulder.. Cover for 1..2…3!!!!

Big E fights himself down, shoves Gable, misses a splash, but Gable runs into an STO. Straps down. Big Ending

Winner: Big E
About as good as one would assume it would be, even if the end was never in question.
Total Rating: ***
Match Time: 4:53

Otis enters the ring, staring down Big E. Ref, who is like a milk dud compared to the big boys, holds them back.

Owens is still looking for love backstage, talking to R-Truth. Truth believes him. He believes in Big Foot, Lochness Monster, monster under the bed, the leprechaun in the hood, he believes the earth is flat, but round in parts and places. He believes in the Thanksgiving Man.

The RAW Women’s team is backstage with Pearce and Sonya. She tells them there will be a five way where the winner faces Becky Lynch. In comes Piper who wonders why wasn’t she included? Belair had a chance at the title and crashed and burned. Becky has moved on, why hasn’t Sonya.

Belair wonders who Piper thinks she is talking to. Pearce breaks up the bickering, says…

Here’s Dana, wondering why she wasn’t included. And Liv? She’s been waiting for this? She’s been overlooked more than any one of them. She wants respect.

Here is Nikki to say that she’s been champion before. She deserves to be on the team.

Vega and Carmella talk some shit. Rhea tells Mella to watch herself, because if she ever talks about her partner like that again,

In summary: bitches be crazy.

Rey is backstage, talking about how Pearce is corrupt and his son suffered from it.

In comes Theory, who secretly takes a selfie.

Reggie is here, now, with his title. He’s got a match coming next.

Match 4: Reggie vs Drake Maverick
So this match was scheduled earlier, yet Reggie is in dress pants and blazer, while Drake is in jeans and Hot Topic boots…

Anyway, Reggie does some flippy shit, but Cedric and Shelton are shown beating R-Truth down the ramp. This is enough of a distraction to allow Drake to roll up Reggie for 1..2…3!!!

Winner: Drake Maverick

Total Rating: NR
Match Time: 1:16

Akira rolls up Drake for 1..2…3!!

Akira rolls out of the ring, but Corey Graves is there to roll up Akira for 1..2…3!!!

Byron Saxton rolls him up for a 1..2…3!!!!

Drake rolls Saxton up for 1..2….3!!!

Reggie rolls Drake up for 1..2…3 MINUTES OF MY TIME WASTED!

Becky Lynch is here lookin pretty hot and ostentatious.

Before the match starts, Bianca is sent to the outside by Mella. Rhea and Liv leave the ring to attack her. Bianca is able to send Zelina into the table while Rhea takes care of Carmella. Liv attacks Zelina while refs try to control the situation.

Match 5: Liv Morgan vs Rhea Ripley vs Bianca Belair vs Carmella vs Zelina Vega
I guess things are in order? Bianca and Rhea go face to face until Mella and Vega come in to break them up. Rhea takes Mella to the outside, while Bianca does the same on the opposite side. Bianca makes short work of her, then she and Rhea head back into the ring to stare down. Bianca with the go-behind, reverese, Rhea shoots the leg, Bianca kicks her away, Bianca hits the orpes, flips over, Mella and Vega grab the boots and send her into the barricade. Rhea headbutts Mella’s tits then big boots Vega down. Snapmare to Carmella, dropkick to Mella’s shoulder. Vega chop blocks from behind. Vega with a punch. Mella comes in to beat down Rhea with Vega as well. Stomps to Rhea. Mella with a kick to the face. Cover for 1..2..NO!!! Vega stops the pin. Her and MElla argue. Liv is on the apron, finally, and gets sent off the apron. Mella with a full nelson, Vega kicks her in the stomach, then we get a back elbow, another. Vega with a running kick to the face. Bianca is back, Mella sends her off the apron. Vega covers, and this time Mella grabs her foot and takes her off.

Rhea slaps both girls around a bit, then hits a back suple—no, Vega fights out. Boot to Rhea. Vega holds Rhea up, Mella licks her hand and hits a chop Another chop. A third, but Rhea moves and MElla hits Vega. Right hand from Rhea, another, body slam attempt, but Mella slams Rhea down on the back of her head. Mella sends Rhea into the corner. Kicks from Mella. Li is back, corners Mella, hits a running knee, gets rolled, turns, enziguri to Carmella. Liv jumps off the ropes, stomp to the back. Cover for 1…NO!!! Vega is there to stomp her back. Knee to Liv, Vega sends her down hard. Rhea sends Vega flying across the ring twice. Knee from Rhea, again, another. Rhea grabs the head, lifts Vega and hits a Northern Lights, but Becky is here to break up the pin! Bianca sends Rhea to the outside. Spear into the corner where Vega is! Bianca with right hands. Mella rushes the corner, Bianca back flips over her, and attacks her and Vega. Liv in, Bianca kicks her away, so Bianca bck flips over her, only for Liv to hit some knees. Mella with an ugly face plant. Cover for 1..2.NO!!! Rhea stops the pin. Rhea with a running dropkick. Rhea grabs Vega, Vega with a tornado DDT. Cover for 1..2..N!O!! Bianca presses Vega in the air and tosses her outside onto Mella, Rhea, and Liv. W

We are back, and we have Rhea and with Vega and Liv on the corner. Bianca comes in to double powerbomb Liv and Zelina. Rhea kicks Bianca, Mella in to attack and cover for 1..2.NO!!! Mella covers each one of the girls and only gets a 2 from each.

On the outside, Mella tries to kick Bianca, but she slams her on the announce table first. Rhea is in the ring, and wants Bianca yet again. Bianca goes for KOD, but Rhea lands on her feet and kicks Bianca out of the air. Riptide and a cover for 1….2…NO!!! LIV IS IN TO BREAK IT UP!!! Liv tries for a modified code breaker move, but kicks Rhea into the ropes. She rushes the ropes and hits the Oblivion. Cover for 1..2..NO!! Vega in to stop the pin. She high kicks Liv in the corner. Liv drops in the corner, Vega runs with a knee to the chest. Vega tries for a Destroyer, biut ianca grabs Vega and goes for KOD, kicks Morgan out of the ring, Kiss of Deat.h Cover for 1..2…NO!!!

Piper is here to pull Bianca out of the ring and send her into the post! Mella covers Vega, gets a 1…2….NO!!! Liv Morgan rolls in and gets a crucifix pin for 1..2…3!!!!

Winner: Liv Morgan
Lol. The longest road ever to get to the result that everyone should have saw coming and no one will care about.
Total Rating: *1/2
Match Time: 16:03

Big E is backstage walking until Seth runs up on him. He says he comes in peace, but he doesn’t want trouble. He is here to understand where Big E’s head is at. He cant believe Owens. Yeah, Seth popped him, but Big E knows him and knows what he is about. He says to trust the devil you know more than the one you don’t.

Big E doesn’t trust Seth or Owens, but bet those sweet cheeks he’ll be ringside to make sure everything goes smooth.

When we return, Big E comes out to watch the next match.

Austin Theory’s music hits and he comes out, taking a selfie with each of the commentary team, then tries to take one with Big E, but Big E smacks the phone out of Theory’s hand. Theory grabs his phone and leaves angrily.

Seth has something to say before his match.

He says he knows he cme out and said Owens was a liar, and this is true, but he’s not the only one that has been lying.

He says what happened last week was a plan between he and Kevin. It was planned weeks in advance. He says he is coming clean about this because he wants us all to know that e, unlike Owens, is a man of integrity….

Here comes Owens. He runs down the ramp and attacks Seth immediately. Seth hops over the barricade outside, so Kevin screams, asking him to get back in the ring.

Match 6: Kevin Owens vs Seth Rollins
Owens is quick to corner Seth and beat down on his ass, making Seth leave the ring to get some space and air. Owens follows but Seth kicks him then sends him into the apron. Right hand to Owens as they walk around the ring. Another right, and a whip, but Owens reverses and sends Seth into the barricade back first then hits a clothesline. Senton from Owens, who enters the ring, then leaves it. Cannonball senton into Seth and the barricade. Owens chases Seth towards the ramp, where he tries to escape the match. Owens sends seth into the ring, rolls in to follow. Chop from Owens. Chop to Seth in the corner. Seth reverses, tries for a chop, but Owens drops Seth hard. He stomps Seth, then heads to the corner. Seth rolls to the apron, so Kevin drops to the apron and kicks Seth in the chest. Jesus. Lol. He kicks, stuffs the head and looks to powerbomb, but Seth locks his foot with the rope, right hand, headbutt to Owens, Seth locks the head and tries for a suplex. Owens fights back with rights. Owens drops Seth to the mat outside. Owens on the apron, flies with a swanton, but Rollins has the knees up. Seth sends him into the announce booth and rolls inside the ring.

We are back, and Seth hits a back suplex to Owens. He covers for 1..2..NO!!! Bearhug to Owens from behind. Seth releases and stomps yhe ribs, then drives a knee into them. They have a slapfest, but Owens hits a surprise DDT. Owens with a firemans, Seth floats off, slingblade. Seth tries for a splash, Owens rolls away. He heads to the top. Frogsplash! Cover for 1..2…NO!!!!

We are back from another break, Seth hits a superkick, Owens hits one, both men standing, Seth with an Enziguri. He bounces off the ropes and hits a clothesline! Both men down! Owens is up first. He heads to the top rope again. Seth runs up with a right hand! Seth with a back fist. Seth locks up the head, Owens clubs the back, shots to the back over and over send Seth down to the mat. Owens screams, but Seth hops up on the top rope, locks the head, but OWENS REVERSES AND HITS A SUPLEX OF HIS OWN! Rollins stirs. Owens does, too. Seth with a Pedigree!!! Cover to Owens fo 1..2.NO!!!! Seth to the top rope. Owens is there to push him, crotching Seth in the process. Seth is able to get Owens on his shoulders. BUCKLE BOMB! BUT OWENS WITH A POP UP POWERBOMB! Cover for 1..2..NO!!! Owens stands first, again, goes for a Stunner, but Seth escapes and elbows Owens in the back of the head.

Owens to the ring steps. Seth runs out, rushes Owens, and nearly gets tossed into Big E, but Big E stands and Seth goes crashing into the chair. The ref hits nine, Seth gets in the ring. Owens tries, Big E is in the way, ref hits 10.

Winner: Kevin Owens
Thankfully, they went with an amazing match as opposed to a safe bet, giving extra energy to give us some love. Too many times, they go the lazy route, but Rollins and Owens did not. While a little long to start, it was to be expected considering the start time. A solid main event to a pretty lackluster RAW.
Total Rating: ***1/2
Match Time: 24:09

Owens on the apron, frustrated. He back kicks Big E in the face then mounts him on the outside and beats him down over and over with rights. He sends Big E into the steps. Again.

Owens screams in frustration, pulling his hair, he removes the tv on the table and grabs Big E. Pop Up Powerbomb on the apron. Owens screams again. He goes to leave, then runs back to attack again as we fade to black.

End Show