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Have you ever asked yourself just how the restaurant IHOP came about?
Me either, but Michael Ornelas is more than happy to share with you how!
You guys, sorry for the shameless plug, but I wrote something recently and I was able to turn it into an audio play and upload it to spotify! Please, give it a listen when time permits! Thank you!
We start with Cole and Pat in the ring. Pat is, obviously, on cocaine, and is hyped as all hell for the upcoming Battle Royale.
Cole sends us to a video package to show us how we got here.
After the package, Jey Uso makes his entrance, and Pat keeps up the Yeetdown.
Uso gets some promo time, ultimately saying nothing until Damien Priest comes out to give him some surprising props. He says one night, Jey beat his ass so bad that he went back into the locker room and told him that he earned Priest’s respect. This is why he wanted him in the Judgment Day. That night, they went out, and Priest doesn’t remember much, but he remembers one thing.
Jey, hilariously, says, “I took an Uber.”
Priest says he remembers one thing that Jey said that night. He said, “We next, Uce.” And he’s here, proud. Jey was right. Priest says, well, actually, half right. Priest was next.
This title shows why he was next. Priest says Jey is just the first on a list of people that the machine is going to feed him to make sure the title looks good on Priest. This is nothing to be ashamed of. Jey gets to be the first to lead the people and fans in making sure that all rise for El Campion.
Jey is like, yo, wut. He wants to holla. Priest is on his way out, but says he doenst get what Jey could possibly say right now after all this.
Jey is offended. That’s all he sees Jey as? Another tag team guy? The only reason Priest is the leader of The Judgment Day is because Rhea Ripley got hurt? By the way, tell Mami he said, hiiiiiyy. With her gone, all that Priest is, is Dom’s bitch.
Priest did what he did, made himself champ, but he aint being fed to Priest, Priest is being fed to Jey. Because he is next. He then asks if Columbus is rocking with him, to give him some Yeet.
JD McDonagh in for a sneak attack, but Jey escapes with ease and hits a Superkick, only for JD to move and Jey to connect with Priest.
Jey tells him my bad and leaves the ring.
World Tag Team Championship Match
#DIY vs Awesome Truth
Truth and Gargano. Truth with an arm drag into an armbar. Truth drops some splits, and the crowd loves it. Johnny is impressed. He offers a handshake and they lockup. Side hedlock from Gargano, Miz gets a tag. They double team Johny with an arm drag then do a double elbow drop. Cover for 1..NO! Tag to Ciampa who comes in with some hard hits. Miz is shocked and meets his energy, trying for a neckbreaker, Ciampa goes for a backslide, Miz rolls through, and gets in a Figure Four. Gargano comes in, Miz ssends him outside, Ciampa rolls him up for 1..2NO!! Johnny in to hit Miz with a spear after the kickout. Ciampa flies over the top rope with a cross body and they celebrate.
WE ARE BACK! But I had some salmon to warm up so I come to with #DIY hitting a Meet in the Middle and a cover for 1..2.NO!!! Miz stops the pin! He and Johnny go at it, Miz tries for a Skull Crushing Finale, Johnny rolls him up! 1..2…NO!!!
Truth in! TRUTH CRUSHING FINALE! Cover! 1..2…..3!!!
Winners: Awesome Truth
We MIGHT be getting a turn here, and it’s probably needed. Wrestling-wise, pretty good match.
Total Rating: ***
Match Time: 10:03
After the match, Johnny shakes the hands of Miz and Truth, but Ciampa ain’t down.
Backstage, Priest is yelling at JD for coming out, saying he had no right going out there and he ddint even get the job done.
Here comes Dominik Mysterio who says he is a bit banged up so JD and Santos Escobar will team up tonight instead.
Priest tells them to handle their bsiness and stay out of his.
Gunther is here!
He and his goons come down. He says he knows what we expect, and he is sorry to disappoint us, but that’s not what he is going to do. He took some time away to think. For 666 days, he elevated the IC title to heights never seen before. His name will forever be embedded in the history of that title.
This also means that for almost two years, he was walking around with a big target on his back, and the pressure of living up to everyone and his own high expectations. That weight is now gone. To Sami Zayn, thank you. He is no longer a target. He is no longer the hunted, he is now the hunted. No matter which brand he gets drafted to, he will make sure his name is embedded into this new era. He officially declares his participation in the King of the Ring tournament.
After that, it’s up to him to decide which title to take next. Sami’s or any other, it’s up to him.
Fair warning, he says. As a champion in the WWE, you will be targeted, hunted by a challenger that is able to win titles and hold on longer to them than anyone else. Already, The General of the Ring. Soon to be the King of the Ring – Gunther.
Nice.
Before they can leave, The New Day is out to sound the alarm. Kofi says Gunther is correct, it is a new era, and what better way to usher it in than with The New Day? Woods says he is the reigning, defending King of the Ring. That makes Gunther a usurper to his throne. A pretender to his throne. Woods plans on cementing his legacy when he becomes two-time King of the Ring.
Gunther tells them that everyone gets it, they understand. Gunther will re-establish the image of the King of the Ring tournament. Woods will be known as a pretend champion.
Woods says interesting, because that’s what Gunther used to be. Kofi wonders where Gunther’s gold at.
Gunther says enough, as they repeat themselves multiple times. He says this is beneath him, then tell Kaiser and Gio to take care of this.
Woods: “No! We fought them so much already!”
Haha. Woods then says ok, if that’s what they want, then they can get it.
The New Day vs Imperium
Kaiser and Kofi to start. Kofi hits a monkey flip off the ropes then a dropkick to the chin. Kaiser sends Kofi to the corner, Kofi kicks out of it, Kaiser with a right hand, then a snapmare into a cover for 1..2.NO!!! Kaiser corners Kofiand tags in Gio, who hits a few uppercuts. He corners Kofi, Kofi reverses, tag to Woods. Woods to the top rope. He drops an axe. Tag to Woods! He hits a shoulder, Woods rolls him away and Kofi hits a springboard crossbody. Whip to the ropes, Gio kicks. Tag to Kaiser. Gio sends Kofi into the corner, hangs him upside down, and we get a double team of kicks from Imperium. Kaiser chokes Woods up with a boot. Kofi with a jawbreaker. Kaiser grabs the arm and goes for a tag, gets one with Gio. Whip to the outside, Gio attacks Kofi, holds onto him, and Kaiser comes in with a clothesline. Kick to Woods sends him off the apron. Cover for 1.2..NO!!!!
We are back, and Kofi with rights nad lefts to Kaiser. He hits some forearms, Kaiser grabs the arm, Kofi grabs the chin, whip to the corner by Kaiser, but Kofi flies off with a clothesline. Tag to Woods, tag to Gio. Woods whips, hits a leg lariat, another whip, Woods catches the head and hits a suplex. Drop toe hold by Woods. Woods dives through the ropes to kick Kaiser, rolls back in, tornado DDT to Gio! Covers! 1..2…NO!!!
Woods in and sends Gio int othe ropes, Kofi kicks, Gio catches him and hits a huge clothesline. Cover for 1..2.NO!!! Imperium tries for a double team move, but Woods shoves Kaiser off the top rope, and Kofi hits a rana to Gio.
Clothesline to Kaiser to the outside, Woods kicks him, hops on the apron, tag to Kofi, Kofi with a backbreaker, Woods flies with an elbow drop. Cover for 1..2..3!!!
Winner:
Total Rating:
Match Time:
Gunther is PISSED. He tosses a chair and stares down Kaiser, then leaves.
Ludwig Kaiser goes into the ring and grabs Gio. He helps him up and walks him out of the ring, giving him a big hug and embracing him. He waits for Gio to get out of the ring, whispers something in his ear, then shoots him into the apron! Kaiser with a huge punt kick to Gio. Kaiser grabs Gio, sends him into the post face-first. Another kick to the chest. He climbs the back of the neck hard. Kaiser holds Gio on the steps until a bunch of agents come to stop Kaiser. They hold him back, and he puts his hands up as they walk him towards the ramp. Kaiser says ok, smirks, and walks up the ramp while Jason Jordan walks behind him. Kaiser then guns it, runs all the way around the ring and dropkicks Gio’s head into the steps and HOLY SHIT that looked bad!! DAMN!
WE follow Kaiser, who walks up the ramp, into Gorilla, and see Gunther waiting. Kaiser tells him that he told him he’d get it done. Gunther smiles.
Drew McIntyre is here.
We get an Andrade video package that says he is not someone’s fool.
We get some recap of Judgment Day trying to take advantage of Andrade, then Andrade turning on Dom.
He says Dom was never loyal. They didn’t want a business partner, they wanted a servant. Nobody tells him what to do. He is now their biggest problem.
Drew makes his way to the ring. A large CM Punk chant starts, so he sits cross-legged and tells the fans that Punk actually hates all of them. The only person he hates more is himself. Ever love something so much that doesn’t quite love you back as much. This is his complex relationship with pro-wrestling.
WE don’t understand complex relationships because the most complex realtionships we’ve ever had is with our right hand. At Mania, he was attacked from behind, then Priest used the briefcase like a coward, then he didn’t get his automatic rematch, but had to compete in a Fatal Four Way. Punk interferes again and Jey Uso takes advantage like a damned coward. As usual, Drew’s back is against the wall. He will come out swinging. He has a new target – King of the Ring.
Sheamus seems to find this a bit bothersome. He walks down the ramp and asks Drew what’s going on. He doesn’t get it. Drew is sitting there sulking and complaining. Let’s be honest, says Sheamus. All he sees is the only person not taking responsibility for his own mistakes.
Sheamus enters the ring and tells Drew this makes him a coward. Sheamus asks if Drew is going to stand up. He’s earned that, no? He’s known Drew 20 years, and for the last four, all he’s heard from Drew is how he was robbed. Then at Mania, he did it – he got his moment and became the champ in front of a crowd. Drew’s brother was there, his wife, then he blew it over some stupid social media spat. Drew should be standing here with the title around his waist. But over a meme and a t-shirt, Drew just threw it all away.
Sheamus tells Drew he’s his friend, they’ve traveled the world together, epic booze ups, and banger after banger together. So as a friend, he is here with some hard truth – a one-armed CM Punk kicked Drew’s ass.
Drew doesn’t care what we think of him, Sheamus knows what Punk did to him as a kid, and knows what this means.
Sheamus says the obsession is taking over.
Drew says ok, before Sheamus was injured, it was banger after banger, but Sheamus has returned, it looks like it’s been burger after burger after burger.
Sheamus laughs this off, says Drew is getting really good at the one-liners. Sheamus says he could lose the weight, though, but Drew can’t lose stupid. He tells Drew to stop blaming everyone else for his mistakes.
Drew rattles off some insults, says that’s what the guys in the back were saying.
Sheamus says he doesn’t care, they can say what they want but Drew cares! He is Sheamus’ friend, his only friend here. They’ve thrown fist then have some pints. Drew is past that, he only fights if it’s worth while, and this is not worth while. He is still there for Sheamus, he’ll go ringside, stand by te table, and watch Sheamus’ back.
Shinsuke Nakamura vs Sheamus
We start with Shin favoring the knee quickly. He kicks Sheamus off the top rope then runs with some knees to the gut. Shin with a boot to the neck. Shin tells Sheamus to come on, and Sheamus asks for the same. He catches a kick, hits somr tight hands, Shin ducks from a clothesline. Shin kicks, an axe kick to Sheamus. Shin hits the ropes, Sheamus pops up, hits a clothesline. Sheamus grabs Shin on the apron then starts the beat down of the chest. He gets a full ten. Sheamus to the apron, he drops the kneepad. Shin turns, running knee to Shin! Sheamus sends Shin into the ring, but he rolls right back out. Sheamus follows outside, Drew is watching by the announce table. Shin kicks Sheamus in the back of th neck, then bounces him off the announce table. Shin to the barricade. He flies off the top of it with a knee to the neck!
We are BACK and Sheamus hits an Irish Curse backbreaker, another one. Sheamus to the top rope. He climbs slow, Shin stands, Sheamus flies with a big clothesline! Cover for 1..2….NO!!! Pat says this is Sheamus’ 1,901st match. Shin with q kick, Sheamus in the corner, Shin spins him, then hits the running German. Shin slides back in, to the 2nd rope, dives and hits Sheamus with a knee. Cover for 1.2..NO!!! Shin with a cravat from behind. Sheamus escapes, hits some elbows, climbs to the 2nd rope with Shin in his arms. White Noise off the 2nd rope! Cover! 1..2….NO!!! Huge kick from Shin. Cover for 1..2..NO!!! Shin is frustrated. Drew watches on as Shin looks to end it, but Sheamus catches him and hits a powerslam. Sheamus is up in the corner. He turns. Tries for Brogue, Shin rolls him up for 1..2..NO!! Shin tries to kick, misses, misses again, big knee from Sheamus. Cover for 1.2…NO!!!
Sheamus flips Shin up for a Cletic Cross, but Shin floats off, hits a knee, kick to Sheamus, runs….RIGHT INTO A BROGUE KICK! COVER! 1..2…3!!!
Winner: Sheamus
Oh Sheamus, how I’ve missed thee.
Total Rating: ***3/4
Match Time: 11:15
Backstage, Sami Zayn is with Jackie Redmond. He says he’s got a lot to say about Chad Gable, but Gable has said he’s goin to the ring later to explain himself, so he’ll wait for that.
Up comes Bronson Reed to tell Sami it’s he that Sami should be worrying about, not Gable. Reed then attacks Sami, smashing him into some boxes. Refs and agents come to hold him back, but Reed runs again with a knee to the fallen Sami.
Chad Gable is out with The Alpha Academy.
Gable says after what happened to Sami backstage, it’s safe to say he’s had a rough couple of weeks. At least what Gable did was justified. Let’s paint the picture. They tear the house down and Sami walks out as champ. But it wasn’t good enough for Sami. He had to rub it in. He found Gable weeping and placed the title in front of his face. He took that on the chin. He stood up and held Sami’s hand in the middle of t he ring, but that wasn’t enough. He found his wife and celebrated when he knew Gable was standing right there. That was Gable’s moment. That should have been him at Mania, him with his daughter celebrating, but he was wasting his time training Sami, wasting his time training a bunch of freaking losers.
Chad turns to face Akira Tozawa. Does Akira have a problem with that? Say something. Gable has a problem with him. All he does is his little dance and racku up loss after loss.
And Maxxine. Pretty as a princess, but dumb as a box of rocks. What else does he have to do? He’s given her everything and got nothing in return.
Don’t even get him started on Otis. Otis, his prized pupil, his number one guy, he has proven himself to be the biggest disappointment of them all.
Gable tells them to back up, this right here is why they signed up, right? For honest feedback to show them how to get better? They cant be mad at him for this. Get on the same page and know that from now on, they will all focus on Gable. They will all win his IC title together. They will help him no matter what, right?
He wants them to say it.
Gable asks Otis first. Say it.
Otis says no matter what.
Gable says good and leaves.
Dominik Mysterio walks up to Ricochet. Ric tells Dom he was really looking forward to beating Dom tonight, but they’ll settle for Santos and JD. Speaking of JD, tell him that Ric will see him Wednesday for their speed match.
Dom and his mustache make fun of Ricochet as he leaves, and here comes Liv Morgan. She stares Dom down, he stares back, and we leave backtage.
Santos Escobar and JD McDonagh vs Ricochet and Andrade
JD and Andrade to start. JD tries for some right hands but Andrade esscpaes and works the arm. JD backs him into the ropes, Andrade reverses and chops. JD tags in Santos quickly. Waist lock by Andrade, Santos with a back elbow, whip and Andrade floats over th back, lands on his feet, hits a shoulder tackle. Andrade locks the head, tag to Ricochet, they both hop over Santos and hit elbows. Dropkick to the head by both and a cover for. 1…NO! Uppercut in the corner. Dropkick to Santos in the chest, then a snapmare and a big elbow drop off the ropes. Cover for 1..2.NO! Cfavat from behind. He works the arm, locks up one arm and pulls back on the other arm into a cover for 1..2.NO!! Ric leg locks, sends Santos flying, hits a dropkick, cover for 1..2.NO!!! Santos chokes Ric up on the bottom rope. Tag to JD. JD kicks the side, another kick, another. Stomps to the ground, a big elbow to Ric’s head. JD pulls him up, whips, back elbow from JD. Cover for 1..2.NO!!! JD with a back suplex.
SHAVE YOUR MUSTACHE chant to Dom.
Ric misses a kick in the ring. Ric hits the ropes, Dom pulls at the leg, JD dropkicks Ric out the ring then checks Andrade off the apron. Escobar with a rana off the apron!
We are BACK and JD hits a low dropkick to the face of Ric. JD sends Andrade off the apron, Santos gets a cover for 1..2.NO!!! Andrade wants the hot tag. Whip to the corner by Santos, Ric fights out, elbow to JD, right to Santos, kick to JD, Duck under Santos, tag to Andrade! He ducks under, sneds JD off the apron, dragon screw to Santos, another, ducks under, hits a right hand, Andrade with a kip up. Running knees to Santos! Andrade covers for 1..2.NO!!! underhook to Santos, but Santso sends him inot the corner, Ric with a bliund tag, Santos hits Andrade with a right hand, Ric with a springboard clothesline then a standing shooting star! Cover for 1..2NO!! JD breaks it up. Headbutt from JD, Ric hits a knee, Crossbody to Santos off the ropes! Both men down.
They both rise, and get tags. In come Andrade and JD. They fight until Ricochet hits the top rope to dive off for a crossbody, but Santos is in to hit him with knees! JD sits Andrade on the top rope, Santos sends Ric to the top rope.
Andrade sends JD off the top and we get Santos hitting a rana to Ric, but he lands on JD! Andrade with a running back elbow! La Sombra! Cover! 1.2…3!!!
Winners: Andrade and Ricochet
Some miscommunications with Ricochet and Santos, but an ok match for the most part.
Total Rating: **1/2
Match Time: 11:57
Here comes Priest to attack Andrade then hit Razor’s Edge to Ricohet! South of Heaven to Andrade!
He tells Dom on the apron that he doesn’t need him, they need him. JD doesn’t understand, because he said it in Spanish, but Damien tells him in English exactly what he just said.
Women’s World Championship Match Battle Royal
Nia Jax vs Piper Niven vs Indi Hartwell vs Candice LeRae vs Maxxine vs Ivy Nile vs Natalya vs Chelsea Green vs Kayden Caarter vs Kitana Chance vs Becky Lynch vs Zoey Stark vs Shayna Baszler vs Liv Morgan
The first girl out is Candice who gets eliminated by Maxxine about two minutes in. Indi big boots her then tries to send her out of the ring, but Maxxine reverses and sends Indi out!
WE come back to Nia Jax eliminated Ivy Nile with ease. Maxxine tries to defend her friend, but Nia shoves her. Nia misses a right, high kick from Maxxine, then a pump kick, and a third enziguri sends Nia to the ropes! She tries for another but Nia grabs her boot and sends her out of the ring.
Becky Lynch is able to eliminate Piper Niven!
Piper drags Becky out of the ring and sends her into the steps! Piper with a running cannonball to Becky!
IN the ring, Chelsea Green is going ham on Nia’s back while Piper tears up the announce table. Nia is outside! She hits a chokeslam to Piper ONTO BECKY! The table doesn’t break! Nia lifts Piper, gets her, SAMOAN DROP ONTO BECKY! TABLE STILL DOESN’T BREAK!
Meanwhile Natalya eliminates Chelsea! BUT THE REFS ARE ALL BUSY AND DON’T SEE HER!! Hahahaha.
Becky and Piper knocked out on th table. Natalya fights Chelsea in the corner.
We are back and commentary says Becky has not been eliminated but she is out cold on the table.
Zoey is able to eliminate Chelsea, and Shayna sends Natie out the ring, too!
We have Nia, Liv, Shayna, and Zoey, while Becky is out. Nia eliminates Zoey. Shayna rushes Nia in the corner, Nia sends her ot the apron, Nia shoves Shayna, Zoey tries to catch her, but Baszler is eliminated.
BECKY IS STIRRING! The crowd loves it. Becky is back in! Kick to Nia, right hand to Liv. Ni smashes her in th corner, Liv sends her flying, dropkick to the back! Nia with a samoan drop to Becky. One to Liv! Nia sends both girls ot the apron. They hang her up then enter the ring and lock the head of Nia up. SUPLEX ATTEMPT TO NIA BUT SHE BLOCKS AND SENDS BOTH GIRLS FLYING WITH A SUPLEX! Nia drags Liv and Becky to the corner! She wants to finish both! But both girls up, send Nia to the apron! Becky with a right hand, Nia fights back, gets to the ing, CODEBREAKER TO NI! Leg drop from Becky!
NIA IS ELIMINATED!!!
Becky and Liv go at it! Becky climbs! Flies, roll through, Liv ggrabs her, sends her, no becky sends Liv to the apron! Liv grabs the head, drags Becky to the apron! Locks up for a suplex! They fight, Becky kicks, locks the head, waits, waits too long! Liv fights! Becky wants a suplex, Liv drops to her knees. Becky with a waist lock. GERMAN attempt but Liv with a back elbow, another, another, Liv kicks the gut, another kick! CODEBREAKER TO BECKY!!! Liv tries for oblivion!
But Becky turns this into a Man Handle Slam! LIV FALLS TO HER FEET! BECKY WINS!!
Winner: Becky Lynch
I thought they were going to give it to Liv, but I’m also ok with this. Girl is a work horse, and it’ll give whoever wins a nice push instead of a “fluke Battle Royal win.”
Total Rating: ****
Match Time: 21:50
Becky gets some fireworks to
End Show
