USWA Championship Wrestling (2.10.1990) Review

-Amazon Prime is missing the February 3, 1990 episode, presumably because Eddie Marlin accidentally sat on his remote control during Father Dowling Mysteries and erased his copy.

-Originally aired February 10, 1990.

-Your host is Michael St. John. This week, we’ll have action from Dallas AND Memphis!

-We lead off with a Jerry Lawler highlight reel, set to “Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap.” The clips are showcasing his new heel persona, including a great clip of him holding the rope open for Kerry Von Erich, and then just letting go so the rope springs up and hits Kerry in the nuts. Lawler looks so awesome in these clips, which showcases the problem they had with this heel turn. Lawler was just so great in the role that it brought him full circle and the fans cheered him again.

-Next we get clips the Soultaker, Charles “Papafather” Wright with an orange mohawk just doing your usual tough guy act.

-And then from there, highlights of a Junkyard Dog vs. Jerry Lawler match from Dallas. Hearing the huge crowd reaction for slow and wobbly JYD is a sad reminder of how much magic that guy still possessed and what could have been possible if he had continued giving a shit after 1983.

-Jerry Lawler gloats about the way the Soultaker left Cobra laying after a Cobra/Lawler match recently. Cobra brought in his friend Junkyard Dog to stand in his corner for a return match with Jerry Lawler in Evansville. And you know what? Evansville is lowering ticket prices by a whole dollar, so EVERYONE can see him knock Cobra around.

-And with that, he head to the Memphis TV studios. Dave Brown and Jerry Lawler are at the commentary table, but here’s King Cobra to call Jerry Lawler a COWARD for needing a bodyguard to stand in his corner and for waiting for the full mandated 30 days before giving Cobra a return title match. Lawler responds with some good old fashioned racism, so Cobra gives him a shot right to the mouth and takes off. Lawler picks up a swivel chair from the commentary table and launches it STRAIGHT at Cobra’s head, metal bottom side first. Holy shit, it’s a wonder Cobra is even moving after the impact.

JERRY “The King” LAWLER vs. T.D. STEELE
-Joined in progress from the Memphis TV studio. Lawler misses a kneedrop and gets caught in a front facelock. Lawler forces him into the corner but gets a right hand. Dave Brown is taken aback by how long this match is going considering Lawler doesn’t even have the singlet strap up. King Cobra runs into the ring to get some revenge on Lawler. He grabs the same swivel chair and Lawler runs for his life out of the studio.

-And now, for the benefit of all the ladies who fainted the first time it airs, we get another look at the video of Jeff Jarrett taking a shower.

“Simply Irresistible” JEFF JARRETT vs. JAMES RATH
-Marc Lowrence is solo on commentary this week in Dallas. Snap suplex and a slam by JJ, and a fist drop from the second rope finishes quickly.

BILLY JOE TRAVIS vs. JIMMY JAMES
-Billy Joe insists on playing a song before the match, but the crowd rudely drowns out his performance of “Black Water” and Travis REFUSES to finish the song, he’s so insulted.

-Armdrag by James, and Travis complains about flagrant tights-pulling. Travis takes over with boots and a slam. Suplex by Billy Joe as a “We want Jeff!” chant goes up, and Travis grabs the house mic to tell them they don’t wanna see Jeff because he’ll just get hurt. Vader bomb by Travis finishes it.

-King Cobra hypes the house show in Evansville, and he’s wearing a Cosby sweater for his promo. That alone just makes me want to buy a ticket.

-Chris Champion will be facing Dirty White Boy in a Loser Leaves Town match this upcoming week.

JIMMY JACK FUNK & DUSTIN RHODES vs. JEFF GAYLORD & SHEIK BRADDOCK (with Skandar Akbar)
-Heels tease dissension in a cute bit where they argue over who gets to pose in front of the camera before the match starts.

-Braddock takes a shoulderbreaker from Funk. Funk works the arm for a bit and gives him ANOTHER shoulderbreaker. Dustin tags in and dropkicks him into the corner, giving him a chance to tag Gaylord. Gaylord knocks Dustin around for a bit but stops to pose and celebrate before tagging in Sheik Braddock. Funk tags in too and he takes a beating, with Gaylord heading back in and connecting with a double axehandle before applying a sleeper.

-Funk survives but they wipe each other out on a double clothesline. Both men tag and Dustin Rhodes fights the world for a bit, but suddenly, The Texas Ranger Team, an elite group of, like, 15 other guys also managed by Skandar Akbar, run to the ring, knock Dustin unconscious with a glass bottle, and put a poncho and a sombrero on him, which is the most humiliating thing you can do to a man, apparently. “The Texas Ranger” turns out to be Gorgeous Gary Young wearing a Jimmy Jack Funk-style outfit, so I feel like we missed something important on the missing episode.

-In Memphis, the Stud Stable announces that Miss Sylvia’s not with them anymore because she’s working at a bar in Missouri and she doesn’t give a damn about them. Robert Fuller pulls out a guitar and treats us to a song…and actually, he’s got a pretty damn good tenor voice, but Bill Dundee comes out and mocks him and Fuller is so frustrated that he stops singing. Brian Lee announces a “Star Search,” encouraging women to write in for a contest where the women watching the show will compete for a chance to replace Miss Sylvia. They make it clear that they don’t want any fat hogs to write in, however.

6.6

The final score: review Average

The 411

One of the issues I'm having here is that the heel side of the roster just totally outclasses the faces in terms of charisma, and it's really difficult to side with the faces in a lot of cases. This is also the second week where they've tried to split the show between Memphis and Dallas, and for the second time, Memphis' stuff just looks infinitely more entertaining.